The sun beat down on Nicole’s head as her lungs burned. It hadn’t been that long since she last gardened, had it? Her body protested as if it hadn’t lifted a finger in manual labor in a long time. She looked over her garden. Lush flowers and vegetable plants spilled over their planter beds, healthy and vibrant—like they were every year.
She looked down into the bald patch of ground and estimated where the last tulip bulb needed to be planted. Jabbing her spade into the rich soil, she scooped out the dirt into a pile. When the hole was deep enough, she pressed the bulging root into the bottom and covered it with earth. Then to make everything just right, she raked the ground out smooth and smiled at the results. This spring, there would be color everywhere.
She picked up the sprayer hose and squirted off her hands. Aaron was always complaining about the fact that she refused to wear garden gloves. But truly, there was nothing like the feeling of rich soil running through her fingers. Still, to avoid an argument, she’d better shower and scrub every last speck of dirt from under her fingernails. Aaron was coming home and she didn’t want to spoil his mood.
Stepping up to her two-story clapboard house, she removed her soiled shoes. She made her way through the back door into the kitchen. Dishes were piled in the sink. Oh, how she hated washing dishes. She sighed.
Shower first, dishes after.
She went into the master bath and turned the water on as hot as she could stand it, stepping into the bedroom to choose an outfit to lay out. She frowned at her closet. Only one dress hung there beside two blouses. She really wished she could afford a decent wardrobe. But Aaron’s job could barely pay the bills as it was. There was never anything left for frivolous purchases.
She took out the only dress she owned and her one pair of dress shoes. Opening her lingerie draw, she found a much better assortment. Aaron made a habit of buying her silky, frilly undergarments at each occasion that called for a present. He mentioned he didn’t trust buying her outer clothes, but underwear… he couldn’t go wrong with that.
Actually, right now she’d take a new T-shirt and pair of jeans over any piece of tiny, lacey undies. She’d literally die for a new outfit.
Stepping into the bathroom, she slipped out of her clothes, stood, and shrieked at the stranger. Dark hair framed a pale face with wide, brown eyes. “Holy crap,” she whispered when she realized it was her own reflection in the mirror. She could have sworn it was the ghost. She narrowed her eyes and stepped forward. Did she really look like the ghostly woman she saw yesterday? Could she have imagined it? How could a ghost have her face?
Maybe she was going crazy. Ghosts didn’t exist, did they? But she spoke with one. And the ghost spoke back to her. Claiming she was her daughter. How could she have a daughter? She was only twenty-five years old! And she’d sure as heck remember if she had given birth to a baby. Besides, the ghost looked to be only slightly younger than she was. So how old did the ghost think she was when she gave birth to her, five?
Nicole shook her head and stepped into the shower. The warm water cascaded over her body as she closed her eyes and sighed. She lathered quickly, attempting to finish before the water turned cold. She didn’t make it.
Shivering, she stepped out and dried off. She probably wasted too much time distracted by her thoughts. She should have gotten in immediately.
She quickly pulled on her clothes and zipped up her dress. Yanking a brush through her hair, she remembered she still had dishes to do before Aaron got home. She’d have to hurry.
Minutes later, she was up to her elbow in bubbles, scrubbing quickly. She raised a cup to place it in the cupboard when she jumped, dropping the mug. It shattered on the floor. She didn’t pay it any attention as her eyes darted around the kitchen.
She was being watched.
“Hello? Is anyone there?”
No one answered her. Silence stifled the room like a thick comforter on a hot summer night. She swept up the broken glass, and then redoubled her efforts to get the dishes clean, hoping that Aaron would get home sooner rather than later.
She’d just wiped down the counters and dried her hands when she heard gravel crunching under the tires of a car. He was home.
She rushed to meet Aaron at the door. He was smiling when he got out of his pickup truck. Thank heavens he was in a good mood.
“Hey honey,” he greeted as he pecked her on the lips. “What’s for dinner?”
“Dinner?” Her heart sank. How could she have forgotten to cook dinner? “Um, I wanted to see what you’d like to eat before I started cooking it.”
He scowled at her. “I’m hungry now. What have you been doing all day?”
Her irritation threatened to rise. She squelched it immediately. “I was working in the garden.”
“I should have known. Well, I’m going see if there’s a game on. Let me know when you’re done with your wifely duties and have a proper meal to feed your husband. And don’t let this happen again. I don’t work hard to come home and starve.”
She had to bite back a retort. What was with her today? She was always a pleasant and obedient wife. Why was she so irritated by her husband’s behavior?”
Stepping into the kitchen, she filled a pot with water and turned it on to boil. Spaghetti was always a safe meal to serve, and it was quick. Taking out an onion, she chopped it on an old, wooden cutting board. Goose bumps broke out across her body, and her eyes darted up. She could swear someone was watching her!
The sound of a football game filtered in from the living room. “Yes!” Aaron shouted. “Manning does it again.”
It couldn’t be Aaron. It had to be the ghost. “Listen, I don’t want to hear anything you have to say,” she whispered. “And I’m warning you, if you don’t get out of my house, I’m going to get a priest to exorcise your butt and send you to hell.”
Silence.
She waited several minutes before relaxing and getting back to her cooking.
Finally, you sound like the mother I know. The voice startled her, making her jump and splatter sauce across the wall.
“I’m not your freakin’ mother!” she whispered harshly.
I’ve got something to show you, the voice said, and then mumbled softly, Gods, I hope this works.
“You stay out of my head!” Nicole whispered.
Sorry, Mom. I wish I could. But you need this.
Seconds later, Nicole found herself skirting around an old, rusted-out Volkswagen Bug. Rain pelted her face and exposed arms as she ran. She tried to make herself stop, but she had no control over her body. She seemed to be a spectator as she played out a scene. But this was more than a movie. Her mind was filled with thoughts and emotions. She was about to do something she really didn’t want to do, but at the same time, she was desperate to get it over with.
With hands shaking and teeth chattering, Nicole opened the passenger door. Inside sat a tiny, four-year-old girl wrapped in blankets and clutching a ratty teddy bear. Her big blue eyes looked up at her, her bottom lip jutting out. She looked like she was about to cry. Nicole rushed to lift the child out of the car. She slammed the door shut with her foot and hurriedly carried her toward a tall, brick building.
The girl shook in her arms. “Mommy, I don’t want my picture taken. Please don’t let them take my picture!” she pleaded from deep inside the blankets.
“Shut up, Sara,” Nicole whispered quietly. She looked around, passing by several people moving along the paved walkway leading to the door.
“But Mommy, I don’t want anyone to see me.”
“I said shut up. They’re going to pay us five thousand dollars.” A mixture of joy and relief made her smile at the thought of that much money. She could just picture taking that money and shoving it in the face of her stupid landlord. He couldn’t possibly evict her if she paid him all the back rent plus an advance on the next three months.
“Mommy!”
“When you can feed yourself and pay your own bills, then we can talk. Until then, you don’t have a say in how I make money.” She adjusted her grip when Sara started to slip.
“But Mommy…” Her daughter used her most annoying screech.
“Sara, that’s enough! If you say one more word, I’ll give Tuddles to the thrift store. I swear I will.” Sara clamped her mouth shut and squeezed her bear tight. Tuddles was Nicole’s leverage whenever she needed Sara to do something. One little threat against her prized bear resulted in immediate cooperation.
They walked through the doors a few moments later. A young woman, with a bright pink, skintight dress sat with her long legs crossed behind a glass desk. Her four-inch stilettos lay next to her bare feet.
“Hello.” The woman forced a smile as she looked Nicole over and slipped on her shoes.
“Hi, I’m Nicole; I’m here to see Mr. Mathis.”
The woman pushed a button on a box and said, “Brian, your nine o’clock is here.”
A door opened a minute later, and a middle-aged man with tanned skin and bleached blond hair approached. “Nicole.” He raised an eyebrow and looked her over as he spoke. “So glad you could come. I’m Brian; we spoke on the phone.”
“Hello,” Nicole answered simply.
“Come with me. We need to talk before we can start.” He led them through the doors to his office—although the word office didn’t seem to fit the room they entered. It looked more like an art gallery, with framed photos lining the walls and strange, abstract sculptures placed randomly around the room. Even the chairs looked like works of art, with flowing lines and brightly patterned upholstery.
“Now before we start our work here, I want to see your daughter’s legs. You said she looked like a mermaid, but I’ll admit I’m having a hard time believing it.” He sat on one of his chairs and crossed his arms over his chest. “However, as owner of The Shocker, I do have an open mind.”
Nicole sat as Sara looked up at her, horror in her eyes. Sara slowly shook her head in disbelief as tears leaked down her cheeks. She kept her mouth clamped shut and squeezed Tuddles so tightly that Nicole could hear one of the seams rip.
The man stood and approached. “It’s alright. Whatever her legs look like, we can work with it. If you lied to me, and she has completely normal legs, I’m willing to allow that. I’ll have to reduce the pay I offered, but I like your daughter’s look. She’s got an angelic face. Either way, she’s perfect for what I have in mind. And our team is great at altering photos.”
Nicole swallowed the lump in her throat and said, “You promise you won’t use her name and you’ll blur her face, right?”
“Of course! We wouldn’t do anything to put your daughter in danger.”
Nicole nodded. “Okay.”
Nicole pulled the blanket away as Sara fought against her. Sara kept her mouth shut, but moaned her fear and disapproval. When the blanket was off, Sara buried her face in Nicole’s chest and sobbed. Guilt gnawed at Nicole. She knew how appalling this was for her little girl.
“Holy…” Brian began, shock stealing away his words. “It really does look like a tail!” he said, his eyes wide.
Sara sobbed against Nicole’s chest. For a moment, she wondered how she could do this to her own child. But then she remembered that unless she could get the money, they’d be out on the streets with no money, no food—completely destitute. Or she’d be forced to go to the government and they’d take Sara away from her. She didn’t have a choice. This was her only hope.
Brian ran to his desk and pushed a button. “Tink, tell Michelle’s crew to come into my office. Now!”
Seconds later, a short, skinny Goth woman with a clipboard came running into the room followed by several others. She skidded to a stop as her jaw dropped, along with her clipboard.
“Michelle,” Brian said as the flustered woman picked up her papers, “gather every available body. This one’s going to be big. I want pictures in studio, and I want pictures on site. We’re going to take this from mermaid washes up on the beach to mermaid integrates into human life.”
He turned back to Nicole and said, “I’ll need you to sign some paperwork. I know I told you it would only be an hour or two, but after seeing your daughter, I think it best if we take the whole day, including doing some outdoor shots. I’m perfectly willing to financially compensate you for the extra time it’ll take.”
Thoughts swirled in Nicole’s head, like what kinds of things she could spend the extra money on, all the things they had gone without. She could even get Sara a wheelchair. That would sure take a load off her back and at the same time give Sara some freedom. This was a good thing. Finally, she could give Sara the things she deserved. “Okay,” she answered.
“Superb,” he bellowed with a wide grin and turned to a man with purple hair. “Cleary, you’ve got a good eye. Why don’t you take the first round of shots?”
Nicole had to fight back the urge to shove people off as they took Sara and whisked her away. She followed Sara as she was caught up in a whirlwind of activity: chattering voices and flashing cameras. Everyone who saw Sara gaped in shock. Nicole repeatedly had to swallow the guilt that rose in her throat. They would blur her face in the pictures, they promised her they would. And they would change her name. She kept repeating those words in her mind.
Sara looked like a deer caught in headlights. She kept darting looks at Nicole with accusing eyes. The photographer took picture after picture, pose after pose, some with props, and some without. They even took her to a beach and had her pose in the surf—with Sara shivering in the cold air. Nicole kept telling herself that this was for Sara’s own good.
Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, they finished with her baby. Sara was sound asleep when Nicole carried her back to the car. The day had completely exhausted her. A seven thousand dollar check was warm in Nicole’s back pocket. She should be excited about the money. That money would mean security for them—a warm place to live, food to eat, and freedom for Sara. But she couldn’t be excited, not with the worry that was squeezing the breath out of her lungs. The thought that she’d just made the worst mistake of her life plagued her mind.
Let’s fast-forward two weeks.
Nicole didn’t argue with the voice; her mind was filled with the heartbreaking event she witnessed. She tried to deny that these were her memories, but as she passed through them, she knew they were true. These things really happened.
The scene changed. Nicole found herself in a grocery store, browsing the shelves as she pushed Sara in a wheelchair. Her daughter bounced and chatted excitedly at a new doll clutched in her hands. It was a cheap thing, just five dollars, but to Sara, it was the greatest treasure in the universe.
“How would you like some TV dinners?” she asked Sara.
“Can I get chicken nuggets?”
“Absolutely, baby,” she said as she pulled several dinners out of the freezer and placed them on Sara’s lap. Happiness swelled in her chest. There were no outstanding bills, no back rent, and she had money to spend on food.
A middle-aged man who looked like he’d spent too much time eating supersized meals at McDonalds gave her a shy smile. “Keep dreaming, buddy,” she said. The man immediately flushed red and turned away. Nicole knew that people thought she was full of herself. But truly, she tried being nice to men like that, and it always turned into a mess—telling them she wasn’t interested, attempting to let them down easy, it was all so exhausting. She found it best to squelch it from the start by being rude.
“Hey, it’s the mermaid girl from the cover of The Shocker!” someone shouted. Nicole looked up to see a group of teenagers staring at her daughter. After a stunned moment, they came up to them, their eyes wide as they darted looks back and forth between her and Sara. A tall, gangly boy seemed to be the leader of the group. “Is she really a mermaid?” he asked, looking at Sara.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Nicole growled as she pushed Sara toward the checkout.
“It is her!” The group was all talking excitedly and followed her.
“Hey! Check it out—there she is!” a girl shouted to another girl, pointing to the newspaper on the checkout.
Nicole followed the pointing finger. There, in full color glory, was Sara, lying in the surf—looking every bit the mermaid the magazine said she was. Sara’s eyes had been red from crying in that picture. Her crystal-clear face looked into the camera with angry, accusing eyes.
They promised they wouldn’t show her face! They lied to me!
Nicole looked down at her daughter in her shiny, new wheelchair. She was curled up in a ball, sobbing. The TV trays lay spilled on the floor along with her precious doll.
“Let’s see her!” a boy yelled, coming toward them.
“Just leave us alone,” Nicole snapped as she picked up the groceries and the toy from off the floor and placed them on the checkout counter. When the grocery store employees started whispering and pointing at The Shocker, she gave up and left her groceries as she pushed Sara out the door. She could hear the footfalls of the group behind her. She hurried toward the direction of their apartment. When the group continued to follow and the excited chatter built, she ran.
Arms from behind grabbed her. Nicole shouted as the wheelchair handles slipped from her grip. They had been on a downward slope. Nicole struggled in the grasp of her assailant as Sara’s chair picked up speed, racing toward a brick wall. The chair hit the wall first, but Sara’s little body soon followed. Her head cracked into the bricks, and her body slammed to the ground. The mob was on her instantly, ripping the blanket off.
Nicole slammed her head back into the nose of her attacker. He shouted as he loosened his grip, and she took off in a sprint toward Sara.
“Get your filthy hands off my baby,” she shouted as she shoved her way through the crowd. In the center, several teens knelt beside Sara. A click and a flash told her someone had taken her picture. Sara was sobbing. The blanket covering her body had been ripped away. She sat exposed, weeping on the cold pavement, with blood dripping down the side of her face.
A boy who looked about seventeen turned toward the crowd and said, “I can’t believe it. It has to be a mermaid.”
“It? You’re talking about my baby!” Nicole shouted and continued to rant at him, using foul words. Words she never imagined she would use. They spewed uncontrollably from her mouth. Even then, the words were too mild for the heartless teen. When the boy looked back at her, Nicole’s fist flew, connecting with his jaw. She was about to swing again, when hands pulled her back. The boy’s head turned toward her. He was livid as he cursed. Raising his own fist, he struck Nicole across her temple. Dots swam in her vision as shouts erupted. Someone said something about the police, and she heard footfalls, some coming, but most going.
“Are you alright, miss?” a warm, male voice asked.
Nicole didn’t pay him any attention as she crawled over to her little girl. She picked up the blanket, wrapped Sara in it, and pulled her into her arms. “I’m so sorry, baby. I’m so sorry…” she repeated over and over as she knelt on the sidewalk, cradled her child in her arms, and sobbed.
A fading voice said, “We need an ambulance at 3203 Hickory Way.”
Nicole was trembling when her tiny kitchen once again came into view. “I remember…” she whispered, sinking to the floor. She tried to recall other memories. There were flashes, images, but as fast as they came, they flew from her mind. “I remember you… You’re Sara.”
Yes, Mom.
“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, baby.”
It’s okay. It was a long time ago. And you were doing the best you could.
Nicole continued to sob at the memories. “Who am I?”
I can’t tell you now. He’s coming. Be careful, Mom. You’re not safe.
“What’s going on?” Aaron stood over her, taking in the sight of burning spaghetti sauce, and boiling, mushy noodles.
“I… I’m sorry, honey. I don’t feel so well,” Nicole said honestly. Her entire world was falling apart. Her life was a lie, a deception. Who was she? Who was Aaron? Was he part of it? Was he deceiving her?
“I’m going to lie down,” she said.
“What about dinner?”
“I’m sorry, honey,” she answered. “There are cold cuts in the fridge and chips in the pantry.”
Despite the fact her back was to him, she could feel his eyes narrow as his gaze bored into her back.