Chapter Nine

 

Aly went downstairs and helped my mom with dinner, and I knew it was time I spoke to Dad about the whole situation. I found him sitting on the couch drinking a beer. The minute he saw me in the doorway, he gestured for me to sit down.

“Let’s take this out to the porch.”

He nodded, and we both went outside under the darkness of the night sky and sat on the porch.

“So…” Dad began. “Let’s start from the beginning. Who is she? What happened? What do you need from me? All that. Sound like a plan?”

I nodded. “Aly and I met on a train a couple of years ago. She was leaving this overbearing Christian community to find herself; I was on my way to a boxing tournament. We had a lot in common. I offered her a job to try and help her make enough to get situated in the city. It was the only way I knew how to help her. She said she’d come and see the arena. While she was there, my PA, and a guy I thought was my friend, felt her up. She panicked, left, and we didn’t see each other again until a week or so ago. That was my fault. I was scared and never went after her.”

“You didn’t beat up the guy who touched her?” Dad asked. “I figured that would have been a trigger.”

“She stopped me. No, literally she grabbed my fist mid-air to get my attention,” I said, laughing at the memory.

He raised his eyebrows. “Well, damn.”

“Yeah, she may be small, but the girl is fucking feisty. Anyway, we haven’t known each other long, but if feels like we have and she’s the nicest person I’ve ever met. I couldn’t not help her. She has no one, and I do mean no one. Onto why we are here. She saw the headline about why I was leaving boxing and reached out to me. We agreed to meet up. I had no idea she went back home, so we set a time and a place. She never showed. Something in my head told me to check the newspaper, and when I did, there was a missing persons ad put out on her by her mom. Long story short, I went to find her.”

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. Dad watched me quietly while he nursed his beer.

“The police in that area are so corrupt. I found her in a storage closet being sliced up with a knife by her supposed best friend while her dad watched. It was to make her a better Christian or some shit like that. They didn’t want her leaving town. I got the details from the hospital staff. The nurses told me they put her in there when they found out she was leaving town. They tased her, quizzed her on Bible verses, and if she got anything wrong, they’d tase her on a light setting so she stayed conscious. When that wasn’t enough, they started cutting her up with a knife. I’m sure you saw her arm. They barely gave her enough water to survive and didn’t feed her damn thing the whole five days. I think that’s why she’s always so fucking hungry. Some sort of after effect.”

“Oh my God,” Dad said and dropped his beer on the table.

I’d never seen him so stunned. His jaw twitched.

“You’d never know she’s been through all that so recently.”

“I know. That’s another thing I wanted to talk to you about. She seems fine, but I have a gut feeling this will all catch up with her. No one is just ‘fine’ after all that shit. No one. She’s a fucking strong woman, so I don’t know what will happen, but let’s just keep an eye on her.”

Dad nodded in agreement. “I’m glad you brought her here, son. I’m proud of you.”

“Proud of me?”

“You saved her life and didn’t nearly kill anyone in the process. There’s plenty to be proud of there.”

“I’m not gonna lie; if she hadn’t been bleeding and begging me to get her out of there, I would have.”

“Anyone would have wanted to, Axel. That is pretty normal. The thing is you didn’t. You thought of her first. For that, I am proud of you.”

“Thank you.”

“Now what do you need from me? Why else are you here?”

“I need your help. You got Ryan Oakland convicted and got me out of juvie.”

“Yes,” Dad said hesitantly.

Whenever discussed that. We never discussed how much it meant to me either. Not only did he fight for me, but he also fought for Sarah when no one else did.

“I need to get Brandon and her dad convicted. I’ll do the grunt work. Hire all the right people. I just need to know how you did it. She’s not truly free until they are behind bars.”

“Of course, I’ll help you,” Dad said as he ran his hand through his hair. “But, Axel, this is going to take time. A lot of time. Remember how long it took me before?”

“I know,” I mumbled.

“So what’s your plan until then? What’s hers? What are you to her, boy?”

“I don’t know,” I said, frustrated. “She just got released. I’m just trying to...” I sighed and slumped in the chair. “I have no fucking clue what I’m doing. I’m not a pro boxer anymore, and as if that wasn’t a hard-enough adjustment, now I have her to worry about.”

“This is a train wreck waiting to happen, you know that, right? Between the two of you. Your issues. Her issues. What you guys are gonna do next. Ryan Oakland. ” He paused and assessed me. “However, I don’t see a better way to handle everything right now. We’ll start the paperwork for the case. You work on gathering evidence and preparing Aly. Of course, your mother and I will be there for you as long as you need us to be.”

I looked at my feet. “Why are you two so good to me? I’m not a good son. I’m not even a good person. This isn’t some insecure, self-pity bullshit. It’s just fact.”

Dad looked at me and smiled. “Three reasons. One, we are good people,” he smirked. “Two, and most importantly, we love you very much. Always will. There’s not much you can do to change that. Lastly, Axel, you’ve made a lot of bad choices. You have a raging temper and are rude to virtually everyone you meet. However, you area good man. Somewhere in there is an exceedingly good man. It was demonstrated with Sarah and now with Aly. We will never stop believing in that person. We’ll never stop hoping you can heal enough to let us in again. We miss you.”

I nodded. Emotions filled me, and I couldn’t find the words to speak. Dad recognized it immediately and understood.

“I do have one condition if you want to continue staying here, though, Axel.”

“Yes?”

Dad looked me square in the eye. “You have to continue boxing while you are here. It controls your temper like nothing else. That and deep breathing. You will need those skills to stay in control under all this stress. You can’t go from pro boxing and getting it all out eight hours a day to nothing. You will lose it. I want you to find a gym in the next three days.”

“Fine.”

“There is another benefit to the girl staying here.”

“That is?”

“Your mother.”

“Huh?”

Dad straightened his posture and turned to me. “You know, Axel, you’ve never given your mom enough credit. She is not an exceedingly strong woman, but she is an exceedingly loving and understanding one. She will be able to help Aly, love her. I’m sure that will be invaluable to her right now. As for you, yes, your mother doesn’t understand you, and your temper scares her. However, the only reason she is so nervous around you is because she loves you so much and wants you to love her back so bad that she is scared to say that wrong thing and push you away even further.”

I sat there and took in what he said. He was right. I was such an asshole. I was about to respond when Aly’s bright face rounded the corner.

“Dinner’s ready!”

The next few days, Dad and I worked on getting everything set up for the case. I kept Aly in the dark for now. Aly spent almost every waking moment with my mom; cooking, cleaning, reading, watching TV. I assumed she needed a woman, someone gentler. I got that. Plus, Mom seemed to love the company. I made an effort to be nicer to Mom after what Dad said. It seemed to shock her, but I noticed her anxiety around me had died down a lot. It made me feel bad about how I treated her my entire childhood. None of that stopped me from continuing to keep everyone at a distance, though. The only time I left the house was to go to my old boxing gym. I hated being there just as much as everywhere else. Everyone asked me for autographs and freaked out because I made it pro, which was a big deal to everyone in this proud, small-ass town. Plus, the safety rules were so strict when sparring that it did little to help me.

That Sunday, I was woken up by the sound of my mom’s heels clicking on the living room floor. The couch was fucking uncomfortable, but I’d never tell Aly that.

“What are you doing?” I grumbled as Mom paced around my sleeping space.

“It’s Sunday, Hun. We have church.”

Oh yeah, I forgot. I threw the pillow over my head and then heard pans clanging in the kitchen.

“Now who the fuck is that?” I snapped as Dad entered the living room.

“It’s Aly.” My mom laughed.

“Oh yeah,” I grumbled.

My mom knew Aly was one person who could get away with being that outright annoying without me saying anything. She was too damn cute.

Sitting up, I glanced at everyone. Mom sat on the couch next to me, along with Dad. They were drinking coffee and talking. According to the clock, church wasn’t for another half-hour. Sundays were my rest day from the gym and boxing. It was annoying I couldn’t sleep in. A few minutes later, Aly came in the room wearing a casual red dress, barefoot with her hair up. She walked around the corner and immediately looked down. She turned bright red when she saw me. I was shirtless. I couldn’t help but laugh out loud. My parents smiled as well. She’d seen me shirtless before, but I think it felt more intimate for her in my house.

“Um,” she said, still looking at her feet. “I made some oatmeal for everyone if anyone’s hungry.”

With that, she whipped around and headed for the kitchen.

“Aly, ”Dad said, stopping her midway. “We are going to church in a bit. Axel told us you are Christian. You are welcome to join us.”

“Oh,” she hesitated.

I immediately whipped around to face her. Aly was a devout Christian. It was the biggest thing I remembered about her. Why was she hesitating?

“I have stuff to do, but thank you.”

Something flashed in her eyes as she spoke. Confusion? Pain? The minute she finished speaking, she abandoned her plan to go to the kitchen and bolted up the stairs at an alarmingly fast rate. I turned to my parents, confused.

“You should go talk to her,” Mom said in a gentle voice.

“What? Why?”

“That girl up there is hurting and confused. Think about her faith and then what she’s been through, how confusing that would be.”

“Why me?” I said, waving my hands. “Isn’t this more your area of expertise?”

Mom looked at Dad. “No, this is something you have to do. You know her better, Axel.”

I groaned and ran a hand over my face. I sat there for a second before I felt a shirt land on my back. I grabbed it and turned to my parents, confused. Both of them were holding back laughter.

“Put a shirt on first. I think she’ll appreciate it, ”Dad said, suppressing his amusement.

“Ha-ha,” I said sarcastically and then smiled to myself.

I threw my shirt on and reluctantly trudged up the stairs. I got to her room and knocked on the door softly.

“Aly, it’s X. Let me in.”

“Uh, one second,” she yelled. I heard her shut something and then some shuffling around.

“What’s going on in there?” I said, trying to rein in my patience.

“Nothing,” she called out. Then she opened the door for me.

I stormed in and immediately started looking around for anything suspicious.

“What do you want, X?” she asked. There was a twinge of anger in her voice.

“First, to know what the fuck you were doing in here before I walked in?”

“Nothing.”

“Tell me the fucking truth, Aly. What were you doing?”

“Has anyone ever told you how bossy you are?” She turned and adjusted something on her counter.

I grabbed her shoulders and whipped her around to face me. “Tell me. ”I tried to sound more gentle. She stared at me for a while and then slumped in my arms with a look of absolute emptiness in her eyes.

“Nothing you’ll care about.”

 

Before X walked in, I was applying for a gun license. If I was going to leave here, I’d need a gun. I needed a way to protect myself. A year ago, even two weeks ago, I would have never carried such a weapon, but what happened with Brandon and my dad was a wakeup call. I had to change, become stronger, and I would. I knew X was angry at me. He wanted to know what I was doing. I couldn’t tell him. He’d try and stop me, and I didn’t want to be stopped.

“I highly doubt that,” X said, crossing his arms.

I pulled out of his grip. “Besides, you don’t tell me anything. Why do I have to spill all my deepest secrets to you? It’s not fair! You know way more about me than I do about you and I’m tired of it. I know nothing about you. I didn’t even know your name until a week ago!!!”

“I appreciate you never using it,” he said softly.

“Yeah well,” I scoffed. “I’ve never met that person. I’ve only met X, so it wouldn’t make sense for me to use your name.”

“Aly,” X said desperately.

“Don’t Aly me!” I yelled.

I was at the end of my rope with everyone. I felt empty and alone. To top it all off, I felt confused and guilty for the space I was putting between God and me. I wanted nothing to do with anything Christian, and it was eating me apart.

“Just don’t! You tell me nothing, yet you help me as if you care. I have no idea what you think of me. No clue. I have no one in this world anymore, and the only person who acts like they might give a crap won’t say two words about himself or his feelings. If you don’t want to talk to me, then please just go. I can’t…” I said, pointing to the door. “Please.”

X looked at me, conflicted, and then stormed out. I slammed the door behind him. I crawled into bed and lay there. I was going to stay right there until my gun license got approved and I could get out of here. The email said it could take up to a week and I was cool with locking myself in that room and sleeping until then. I skipped lunch, and no one said anything. It wasn’t until dinner that X’s mom had come up and gently encouraged me to come downstairs. I thanked her but said no. Around ten that night, I heard the front door slam shut. X was home. I knew it immediately by the tension I could feel even from upstairs.

It took less than ten minutes to hear his footsteps storming up the stairs and his fists pounding on my door.

“Aly, open the door now!” he yelled. There was no restraint in his voice. He was pissed.

“It’s open,” I snapped back and pulled the covers up to my neck. I was in my pajamas: short shorts and a cut off tank with no bra. I had to remember not to get out of bed no matter what he said.

He came barrelling in the room, and I immediately noticed he reeked of alcohol.

“Are you drunk?” Disappointment and anger laced my voice.

“That doesn’t fucking matter!” he roared. “Why the hell haven’t you left your bed? And why the hell aren’t you eating anything?!”

“I’m not hungry,” I said, pulling the covers up higher.

“Don’t test me, Aly,” X warned.

“You are an angry drunk, you know that?”

He raised an eyebrow at me. “And that comes as a surprise to you?”

“No. It doesn’t.”

“Now get the fuck out of bed and come eat some food. I’ll be a nicer person if you would just stop with this shit right here,” he said, gesturing to the bed.

“You’ll never act like a nice person! I know you are a nice person, but for some reason, you refuse to act like one!”

I clenched my fists so tight around the top of my covers I could feel my nails digging into my skin. I knew I was speaking out of anger, but I didn’t care. I was sick of being bossed around.

“You are coming downstairs!”

“No, I’m not!”

“Yes, you are.”

I shook my head. “No, I’m not.”

He spun around. “Fine! Is this what you want to hear? You want to know about me so bad, huh?! My best friend in the whole fucking world, the girl I loved, was raped by some idiot who’s apparently out of prison and back in this fucking town. I found her after it happened and let her go home. I let her go when I knew she should have gone straight to the hospital. The next morning, they found her dead. All I have left of her is a letter that she gave me. A letter that I that reminds me every day that I managed to do the exact opposite of everything she asked of me. I went to juvie afterward for beating up the bastard who raped my girl. Are you fucking thrilled now?”

The vulnerability in his voice was beyond apparent despite his anger. The anger was no longer rage; itwas hurt. Deep seeded pain buried under years of distractions, drugs, and fighting.

“Now come downstairs and eat before I lose my fucking mind.”

I stared at him in shock. He turned away from me and looked at the ground. I climbed out of bed and put my hand on his face.

“I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry. What was her name?”

“Sarah. Her name was Sarah.”

“At least she died with someone who cared about her so much. Most people don’t ever get that, Axel.”

He snapped out of his fog the minute I used his real name.

“Axel?”

“Yeah. We’re in private, right? That is your name. So I felt it was appropriate to use.”

He paused and then looked down at me. Something flickered in his eyes, and I realized what I was wearing. I pulled away from him instantly and ran to the bed so fast I got dizzy and had to lean my head against the headboard. My body still wasn’t up to par.

I sort of expected X to be laughing when I finally opened my eyes again, and vertigo and nausea had passed, but he wasn’t. He was staring at me lustfully. I think.

“You dizzy?” X asked before clearing his throat.

“A little.”

“I’ll grab your food this one time.”

“Thank you,” I mumbled with bright red cheeks. The air in the room had changed dramatically. I felt a weird combination of embarrassment, lust, and confusion.

He reached the door and then turned back towards me. “You know, you are an extremely beautiful woman. You don’t get enough credit for that.”

I was lit up from head to toe. I groaned and grabbed my phone for a distraction. There was a ding in my email box. I opened it, and my heart skipped a beat.

Your request for a gun license in the state of California has been approved.