Chapter Fifteen

 

I was ambushed by that motherfucker Brandon. He stabbed me in the side, and I couldn’t fight because I went into shock for a few minutes. By the time I pulled myself together, I was outside and they threatened to shoot Aly if I moved. So I stayed frozen and focused on managing my pain and staying conscious. Seeing Aly walk up to this mess ripped me up. It sent fire to my heart, and there was nothing I could do about it.

This was one of those very few instances in my life where fear was the reason for my fire over anger, and it was only because of Aly and what he’d do to her to get back at me. This was my fault, and Brandon was here as well.

Dear Jesus.

Aly wasn’t even out here for two seconds before throwing every single motherfucker in that room for a loop by pulling out a gun. Where the hell did she even get a gun? Honestly, in that moment, it didn’t matter to me where she got the gun because there were too many guns pointed at her and she was entirely too concerned with saving me.

I usually didn’t take anything Ryan Oakland said seriously, but it was Aly’s reaction when he brought up Carmen that caught my interest. Aly was hiding something from me, something big.

I stared at her blank face. “What the hell do you mean Carmen didn’t die in a car accident?”

I hated that I was giving Ryan the fuel he wanted by reacting. I told myself I wouldn’t get worked up over what she had to say. She could have told me she was a freaking axe murderer and I would have kept my cool. But she managed to keep a secret in the one area that was certain to get a reaction from me, the death of a loved one.

“I didn’t want to lie to you,” she cried, still holding the gun up at Ryan. Her grip was faltering. “It wasn’t personal. My whole family has told this story for ages. It’s just what we tell people…versus the truth.”

“Oh yeah, well, your family members are such upstanding citizens you should listen to them.”

“It wasn’t their lie I was telling,” she said quietly. “It was mine. My story.”

I looked at her, completely stunned now.

“I begged my parents to say she died in a car accident because I never wanted to face the reality of what happened again. Carmen was different from birth. She never cried, was never angry, and couldn’t understand rules. It was like speaking to a wall sometimes. She only reacted when it strictly pertained to her. We ignored all the signs, though. She and I played well together, and she did as she was told. But then…”

Aly stuttered and looked at the guns and then at me before sitting back on her heels to keep from falling over.

“We were playing some game, and I didn’t let Carmen win like I usually did. She leaped across the board game and held me down. She took one of the trucks and started stuffing it down my throat. I couldn’t think or breathe, and I started panicking. She then took another one of the game pieces and stuck it in me. I was so focused on breathing I didn’t notice until the aftermath of everything. Well, then she wrapped her hands around my neck and started choking me. I tried gasping for air, but her grip didn’t allow for any slack. Luckily, my parents walked in and pulled her offme. My parents called the police, and she was taken to a psych ward for evaluation. It turned out she was a sociopath. She’s in some insane criminalasylum now, and I never spoke of it again. My parents went obsessively Christian after that. I made up this lie and promised to always obey them if they kept my secret. Now move the gun away from X.” She turned to Ryan and stood back up. There was a dead look in her eyes.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I whispered. How could her life have been worse than it already was? Why did she lie?

She didn’t look at me when she spoke again. “Two of the three people in my life tried to kill me. I didn’t want you to know there was another. I liked you and…” She turned the gun on herself. “…what if I kill myself? Will you let him go?”

My heart raced, and Ryan smiled. I saw Brandon come up behind Aly. I tried to warn her, but he’d already grabbed the gun and tossed it aside. He grabbed her left arm and jerked it behind her painfully. She kicked around, and then he swung his leg under her knees, forcing her to the ground.

“This is your fault, Brandon! You knew there was more to the Carmen story. You told him!” She tried to turn around, but he kicked her square across the jaw.

I jerked forward but was instantly reminded I was stabbed. “Step away from her!” I yelled.

“Oh yeah,” Ryan said, grabbing my hair. “What the hell are you going do about it?” With that, he threw me back down.

“Fuck.” Aly had to hang on.

I had texted Dad our 911 code when I was down after Brandon stabbed me. He had to get here fast, though. I was losing a lot of blood, and I couldn’t pass out and leave her here alone.

“So,” Ryan said with a smile. “Step two of the plan is a favor to both of you. Let’s start with Aly again. Aly, why don’t you tell Axel the one thing you’ve been avoiding telling him...about your feelings.”

“You are sick,” she spat out, wiping the blood from her mouth. “Why are you doing this?”

“Because!” Ryan shouted. “I hate him! He’s gotten every single fucking thing he wanted, and then Sarah befriended this angry fuck and wouldn’t even look at anyone else, so I taught her a lesson. Then you came, and it just reminded me how much I fucking hate him.”

“You liked Sarah?” Aly asked before I could. Then she threw me a look of deep sympathy.

He glared at her. “Talk or he dies,” he said, cocking the gun at my head.

She looked at me and then Ryan, but it was cold and indifferent.

“I love him. Is that what you want to hear? I’ve been avoiding him because I love X and I know he’ll run. There, you happy?”

I stared at her, open mouthed. “You love me?”

She turned slightly red, but she was too focused on Brandon holding her to see me. She didn’t say anything.

“Now,” Ryan said, clapping his hands together. “The final step of my plan.”

He was torturing Aly in the worst way. He was toying with her emotions. Where the fuck were the police? My parents? The downside of a small town…. everything takes forever, and I was going to lose consciousness if they didn’t hurry. I was trying to use skills I’d learned in boxing to manage pain, but that would only last so long. Wouldn’t someone have heard the shouting or the guns by now?

“What the fuck is the ‘final step of your plan’?”

Ryan grinned at me, and I instantly knew. I shot up, and Ryan pushed me back down.

“Relax, Axel. You’ll lose blood. I’m not going touch her,” he paused, “Brandon is.”

Aly gasped, and Brandon grabbed her wrists and started pushing her down.

“You know, Aly. I love how things come full circle. You rejected me, now I get to show you a smidge of all the anger you’ve caused me all these years. Such a cock tease,” he said, turning back to me. I swore I’ve never felt more on the verge of crying or killing in my life.

“I hate you!” she gasped.

He started to push her down further, but she managed to get one of her handsfree and grabbed the gun that he had so conveniently laid down by her. She put the gun to his chest.

“Step away or I’ll shoot,” she warned.

He hobbled back, and she stormed at him.

“You wouldn’t,” he stuttered.

She cocked the gun.

“Aly,” I said slowly, trying to calm her. She’d regret it the rest of her life if she killed him. It’d destroy her.

“You were my best friend!” she shrieked. “I loved you like my own flesh and blood, and you hurt me and lied to me, and now you told them about CARMEN, and you were going to rape me.” She put the gun to his head and cried, “I hate you so much. You’ve ruined everything.”

Luckily, cops came storming in at that moment yelling for everyone to “get down on the ground.” Everyone dropped their guns and fell to the ground. One by one, the cops started taking people out in handcuffs. Thank God for my parents. They must have called the cops right after I texted them. A cop came over to me and started inspecting my wound and asking me a bunch of questions about what had happened. I had lost quite a lot of blood, but luckily, I had sustained no other injuries. It was sort of a miracle. I looked across thelawn and saw Aly still kneeling on the floor in shock. Luckily, the gun had since been removed by one of the officers, but she still looked completely haunted. Her eyes were glazedover, and her mouth was slightly parted. There was a cop crouched down next to her whispering, but it didn’t seem as if she could hear him.

I tried to push myself up, but the EMT who had just come over gently pushed me back down.

“Sir, you have to stay here until we know the extent of your injuries.”

“I have to go to Aly,” I said, gritting my teeth and looking him square in the eye. “That cop will never get through to her. She needs me.”

The EMT threw me an annoyed but understanding look. He got it. My girl came first… always. I looked down at his hand and saw a shiny gold ring on his finger. He was married.

“How about this?” he offered as he gestured for another EMT with a gurney to come over. “You cooperate. Get on the gurney, and you two can talk while I get you to the ambulance.”

In the right state of mind, I would have ignored the EMT and stormed over to Aly, but I was too weak. I mean, luckily, I knew the stab wound didn’t go as deep as it could have, but still I had lost quite a lot of blood and stars were clouding my vision. So reluctantly, I gave the EMT a swift nod. He immediately sprang into action. The gurney was already near me, and the two went to work lifting me onto it and working to stop the blood loss. I couldn’t keep my eyes off Aly and the officerthat was trying to pacify her.

“Charles!” one of the EMTs called. The officer with Aly quickly turned around, giving the EMT a nod. The two met in between Aly and me and began mumbling as the other EMT got everything settled and prepared to push me into the ambulance. The officer, Charles, and the EMT shook hands. Charles walked back over to Aly and carefully grabbed her arm to guide her towards me. She was still so dazed that the officer was all but pushing her along.

“Aly, it’s me,” I said gently. “It’s X.”

She didn’t even turn her head. Despite there no longer being an active threat, Aly’s eyes were wide and glazed over. In her head, she hadn’t been saved yet. She still saw the group of men who had just emotionally toyed with her in the worst way. This was the reason I hated Ryan Oakland more than life itself. He didn’t pick on me, because he was too much of a coward. He picked on the people I cared about most, the people I loved: usually innocent young girls who did absolutely nothing to him.

“Aly. Aly!” I snapped. My tone became more pressing the longer I was faced with that distant look in her eye. “It’s me. It’s Axel.”

“X?” she said slowly, and I saw her eyes flicker with familiarity.

“Yeah, girl. It’s me.”

At the use of her old nickname, she finally blinked and looked at me and the gurney I was being pushed on. Her eyes filled with worry as she briefly looked down at my stab wound and the EMTs pushing me. I wanted her to stop worrying; I wanted to be sure she was somewhat okay before the stars that clouded my vision took over. I was close to the ambulance and even closer to passing out, and Aly still looked like she was somewhere far away.

“I love you,” I said, desperate to reach her. She just stared at me blankly in return. I tried again. “I love you very much.”

“You do?” she whispered.

“Yeah, I do, Al. Knew it right away. Sorry I had to yell at you seven hundred times before I figured it out.”

She gave me a weak smile and looked over her shoulder at the EMT and then at the ambulance I was approaching. “Get to the hospital. Be okay, Axel. Be okay,” she whispered to me and squeezed my hand.

“You’re not coming?”

“I’ll meet you there.” She tried planting a really bad fake smile on her face, but it was sad, broken, and distant. Her eyes were empty.

That was when I knew this was far from over because Aly Abernathy was most definitely not okay.

 

 

 

 

The minute X was taken away, one of the EMTs came over to me.

“Ma’am, are you okay? Did you sustain any injuries?”

“No, I wasn’t touched. I’m fine. How’s X? Is he okay?”

“I’d still like if you would come with us just to be sure.”

“With all due respect, I’m not going. I’m not hurt. What I want is to meet X at the hospital. Is he okay?”

“He’s okay. He passed out the minute he got inside, but he’s strong. He told us he was going to pass out for a bit. I’ve never seen that before. We are taking him to the ER now. He’ll get some blood, stitching, and he should be okay.”

I nodded. The EMT looked me up and down.

“Ma’am, are you sure I can’t take you to the hospital to get checked out?”

“I said no!” I snapped but then mumbled a sorry. I couldn’t yell at someone who dedicated his life to saving people.

He nodded and walked away. I stared out in the distance for a minute and then felt a presence next to me. I looked over and saw a young officer, probably no older than twenty-two.

“Ma’am?”

“I told the EMT I’m not going to the hospital!” I snapped.

“Ma’am, we have to ask you a few questions. I can drive you to the station.”

“I’m not going to the station until I know X is okay.”

“Ma’am…”

I gave him a death glare.

“I’ll drive you,” he said with a sigh and shrugged his shoulders. “But, ma’am, we will have to ask you some questions, okay? We will keep an officer stationed at the hospital. Now, I am going to have to ask you to leave the scene so we can pull evidence.”

We walked out to the front of the house where the officer’s car was. From across the lawn, I saw X’s dad. I froze.

“I need to talk to him,” I said, breaking my trance and turning to the officer.

“Okay, how about you two drive to the hospital together? I’ll follow. While you are waiting for your boyfriend to get out of surgery, you can answer some of my questions.”

“Okay. That’s fair,” I said, already turning around to go to X’s dad.

He stood there solidly with his arms crossed over his chest. His lips were pursedtight, and I could see his eyebrows pulled together in worry.

“What are you doing here? You should be with X!” I said before he could ask me any of his questions.

He gave me a knowing look. “Do you think Axel was going to let us both go with him when you stayed back?”

I huffed and bit my lip.

“Axel has always been a lot to handle. He is over the top and driven in everything he does. There is no middle ground with him. It’s how he became so successful in boxing, but it’s also why he couldn’t live in that world for too long. He lets very few people in, but the ones he does, he protects furiously.”

“I know,” I said, looking down at my hands with a small smile. “I found him fascinating and frustrating from the first time I met him. He’s…” I sighed. “I’m lucky we became friends. I don’t know where I’d be without him.”

His dad gave me a soft look. “We should head to the hospital. I want to be there when Axel gets out of surgery.”

I nodded. We both headed to his car, and I immediately went to the back seat.

“Aly, you can ride in the front.”

“No, it’s okay. I, um, think I’m better off back here. I need to think,” I said, scrunching my face and brushing my hair back.

“Sorry, Aly. You are riding up front. The last thing you need is to think.”

I rolled my eyes, but his tone was firm and didn’t allow for any negotiation, so I followed him to his car. I was impressed by his ability to stay calm given what he had just walked into. Once we were on the road, we headed to the hospital at an alarmingly fast rate. As we sped down the freeway, my mind began to race. My dad is dead; he felt bad about what he did. Brandon almost raped me. Carmen…

“Aly, Aly…” a deep voice said.

“Yes...uh, yes,” I said, snapping out of it. “Yeah, what can I help you with?”

He shook his head and shot me an amused smile at the weird way I asked that last question.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” I responded.

“Aly, you were breathing heavily and rocking back and forth. You were on the verge of a panic attack.”

“Oh no, I wasn’t.”

He shot me a look but let it go.

“You know,” I said as we approached the hospital, “you guys are amazing parents. Thank you for being so good to me. Thank you for letting me stay with you and talk to you and for not letting me die in that alley a few months ago. I could never do enough to thank you.”

“You can do one thing for me.”

“Anything,” I said.

He parked the car and turned to me. “Talk to my son. About everything. Give him a chance. I think he’d surprise you if you trusted him with how you are feeling right now. Don’t make the same type of mistake me and his mom made, because you will lose him.”

I looked at him desperately, but I reluctantly nodded. I didn’t want to, but if that was the only thing this man wanted of me, I had to give it to him.

We both ran into the hospital as the reality of X’s injury set in. We were told he was on the fourth floor and still in surgery. The second we found out where our waiting room was, we took off in a sprint. We both went to the lobby, and I paced around until the young officer who had spoken with me earlier rounded the corner. I whimpered. I didn’t want to answer questions, but it didn’t look like I had much of a choice.

“Aly…” the young man said softly. “You ready?”

I nodded. I followed him into a private office where I relayed the details of what happened. I left out what exactly Ryan and Brandon made me say; I just told him they made me relay personal secrets. The officer didn’t question me further on those points. I think he could tell I wasn’t ready and he let me pass on those details for now. I’m sure he figured he could get it from X, which was fine. He continued questioning me until a short red-haired nurse popped in and told me X was out of surgery and asked if we could talk. I immediately thanked the officer and headed to the waiting area where his parents were. They looked beyond worried, and I completely understood how they felt. The nurse looked at all three of us and gestured for us to follow her to a more private section in the hallway. We followed her. All three of us fidgeted nervously.

“So…” the nurse began, “Axel handled the surgery well and is in recovery. We put him in a medically induced coma to help accelerate the healing process. He lost a lot of blood, and that posed the biggest threat. However, he is a very strong young man, and we were able to stitch him up. He should be awake in six to eight hours. Feel free to grab some food or go home and rest. You need to take care of yourselves as well. There is nothing more you can do until he wakes up.”

“Thank you, Sheri. I appreciate your help,” X’s dad said gently.

“Yes, thank you!” his mom chirped in.

I said nothing. I just tried to breathe and stop myself from having a panic attack in front of X’s parents. The nurse nodded to the three of us and walked off, tucking her clipboard in closer to her side.

“What do you want to do?” X’s tear-stained mom asked the two of us.

“Well, we could stay in X’s room and wait for him to wake up, but I think we should prep the house for his arrival. Then we can head back here.”

“Set him up in the bedroom,” I added quickly. “He’s taking the bed.”

“He’ll be angry… even given the circumstances,” his dad warned.

“I could care less.”

His dad nodded. “Are you coming with us?”

“No, um, I’m going to wait in the waiting room.”

X’s dad looked at me suspiciously but decided to let me have my space, which I was grateful for.

For the next five hours, I sat in the waiting room staring straight ahead. My body felt like a statue. Sometime in the third hour, another officer came to speak to me and I politely obliged and told him what I knew. Around the sixth hour mark, X’s parents came back. They both looked slightly more rested and a little less anxious. I greeted them with my best attempt at a smile, but I could see X’s dad didn’t buy it.

Finally, seven hours later, the same nurse came back out wearing a bright smile.

“He’s awake and doing very well, I might add!”

X’s parents immediately sprang to action. They stood up and bolted down the hallway, and I stayed close behind them.

We got to his room, and his dad and mom ran right in, but I didn’t. I stood outside the door. His family was with him. I wasn’t family. In that moment, I felt more alone than I ever had in my entire life. I took three steps back and then ran into the women’s restroom and hyperventilated. Where would I go? What had gone so wrong in my life? My thoughts were spiraling out of control when I heard my phone ding. I pulled it out and opened the text.

“You going to make sure I’m okay or are you going hide forever?”

Shoot. I winced and did the walk of shame out of the restroom. I walked back to X’s room and stood in the doorframe.

“Hi,” I said, fidgeting with my hands.

I was trying so hard not to cry. X used the hospital bed to push himself up to sitting. He made a pained expression as the back of his bed shot upright. His mom and I both stepped forward, but he was up before anyone could stop him or help him.

“X, seriously, be careful. Your stitches,” I warned.

He gave me a sympathetic look and turned to his parents. They both nodded at him and started walking out of the room, patting my back on their way out. Where were they going? Don’t leave me here, I thought, panicked. When his dad passed me, he leaned in and whispered in my ear.

“Don’t forget what I told you, Aly. Talk to him.”

With that, they were both gone, and I was left alone with X. My heart was beating so fast, and I felt like I was going to vomit.

“Your parents probably wanted to stay with you,” I mumbled. “They’re so worried about you.”

He just kept staring at me. His gaze was intense as his black hair sat over his even blacker eyes and face that was pale white from blood loss. He had dark circles under his eyes, but somehow despite all that, he seemed strong.

“You’re pale,” I continued. “I guess that’s a side effect of everything, you know. I…”

“Aly,” he said, cutting off my nervous stuttering with one word.

“Yeah,” I said, ducking my head.

I didn’t know what I was waiting for or expecting from him, but all options scared me: love, hate, anger, rage, sympathy, distrust… it was all terrifying.

“Come here.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, X.” Tears slipped down my cheeks. “I don’t think…”

“I said come here,” X said firmly. “Don’t make me get bossy.”

I weakly walked over to his bedside.

“You feeling okay? Can I get you anything? I mean, the nurse said….”

“Aly!” X snapped. “Sit.”

I immediately sat. Being with him was so awkward now.

“What do you want?” I said, looking anywhere but at him.

“Are you okay?” he asked gently, pulling my gaze towards him. “I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking sorry that you got involved in this. I knew he would try and pull something. I just never imagined… that.”

“I’m fine,” I said, trying to convince myself more than him. “Like, I’m totally fine.”

“Really?” X said with a frown. “Totally fine?” He leaned forward.

“Mm-hmm…”

X leaned forward until he was right in my face. “I call bullshit.”

I held my defensive stance for a second and then let my shoulders fall, and I slipped back in the chair.

“What do you want from me, Axel?” I yelled as tears rolled down my face. “Huh? You know it all now! You know that anyone who’s ever loved me has either tried to kill, screw me, or run away from me, so I guess that’s all there is to say!”

X didn’t react at all. He stayed perfectly still while I was on the verge of throwing my chair across the room.

“How do you feel about your dad?” he said calmly.

The one time I didn’t want X to be calm, he was.

“He’s dead, you know, so I guess sad. Right? Yeah.”

“There is no right or wrong answer, Aly.”

“I hate you so much,” I said, standing up and trying to blink back the tears stinging my eyes.

“You can hate me all you want as long as you stay.”

“Stay?” I yelled. “I can’t stay! You...you… There’s…”

X took a shaky breath, and I came over immediately, worried something was wrong with him. When I was by his side, he grabbed both of my hands firmly. It felt weaker than his usual grip, but it was still strong enough to keep me in place.

“What are you doing?! You’re going to hurt yourself!” I yelled.

I tried to jerk away, but he tightened his grip. Honestly, I probably could have gotten away, since he was pretty weak, but I am not sure I wanted to. I was torn between wanting to run and wanting to be held.

“You’re supposed to be hurt. You’re still pretty dang strong for a guy who was stabbed.”

“Stop fighting, Aly,” he said softly. “Please.”

I huffed but stopped fighting him. I let my hands go limp and turned my head to the side to face away from him. He let go of my hands, and for a brief moment, I thought he was gone. However, a second later, I heard the sound of the bed being raised and then his strong arms were wrapped around me in a surprisingly gentle, intimate gesture. I wanted to fight him, but for some reason, with that one move, he tore my wall down.

“I’m so sorry,” he said again. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“I’m not ready to talk,” I finally said when we broke away. “I can’t…”

He nodded and grabbed my hands to pull me towards the bed. We both sat there tucked into one another before he turned to face me again.

“You don’t have to talk to me. Especially not now. I will say that I am so fucking hurt for you, Aly. So fucking hurt. I said we wouldn’t talk about it, but we do need to discuss one thing.”

“And that is…?”.

“Why are you trying to run again? What are you running from?”

I tried to stand up, but X put his hand on me, gently forcing me back down. “Okay, your dad made me promise to talk to you, so I will.”

X looked at me curiously and shifted around to place even more focus on what I was going to say.

“X, I’m alone. I have no one in my life, and that’s not fair to you. I still want to be friends someday, but I just need to get away and somehow deal with everything. I don’t know if I’ll ever be the same girl you met on the train. I feel… I don’t know broken, empty somehow. I’ve already put you and your family through so much. I won’t continue to do so, Axel. I just can’t do that to you. I care too much. Don’t you get it?”

X took a very deep breath and grabbed one of my hands. His expression was serious. Probably the most serious I’d seen him.

“Listen to me closely, Aly. There is a reason my dad asked you to talk to me.” He sighed, and his expression darkened.

Despite my desire to distance myself from him, I couldn’t handle seeing him in pain. I squeezed his hand, and he gave me a weak smile.

“Aly, that’s what Sarah told me in her letter before she died. She said that the only person who has ever really loved her was me. She said she couldn’t do that to me. That I couldn’t be in charge of putting her back together, in charge of loving her and keeping her alive when she just didn’t want to be here anymore. She said that she would never again be the Sarah I knew. Aly,” he said, closing his eyes in pain.

When he opened them again, there were a few tears in them. Not anger, fury, or fighting...tears.

“I would have given every one of my limbs to tell her what I am going to tell you now. I don’t fucking care how many friends you have or how much you have to lean on me. Go ahead, lean on me! Fucking fall on me if you have to. Just don’t leave me, don’t run away. When I first met you, you were a young girl running away from home to find herself. You said the first thing that came out of your mouth and looked at the world around you with fear and amazement. You could barely carry your bag and showed up in Seattle in a white dress as if you had no clue it rained. You told me you were lost when you met me and because of it, I related to you. Still do. You’ll make friends one day. Have a great job. All those things. Life fucking changes at the speed of light.

“Ya know, this past month, we have both been so immature avoiding saying how we really feel and what we want to do moving forward. I’m done with that. I want out of this stupid fucking town, and I want to start my own boxing gym, do things my way. But whatever it is I do, wherever I go, I want you with me. I want you to be my girlfriend, and I want us to get through this together. We can talk about all the details later. I need to heal up and well, you know, we need to make sure you are stable. After that, we will make a plan, and until then, I’ve got you. Okay? Don’t worry about how many friends you have, how much money you have, or how crazy you go. Just don’t run away and we’ll somehow work shit out.”

I paused and looked at the man with black eyes and black hair. The man who was capable of so much violence and yet so much kindness, all at the same time.

“I’ve gotten better about the word vomit thing, haven’t I? I mean, l don’t just say whatever comes to my mind anymore.”

He smiled. “No, now you either ramble nervously or avoid the topic entirely.”

“Yeah,” I said, trying to bite back a smile as I looked down at my feet.

“Aly?” X said, grabbing my chin and pulling my gaze towards him like he always did when he had something important to say. “Did you mean what you said? Do you love me? I sure as hell understand if you don’t, but I need to know.”

I bit my lip and tried to look down. “Axel, please.”

“I need to know, Aly.”

“Why do you care about me so much? Why are you so nice to me? I don’t get it!”

“Easy, because I love you. I’m fucking crazy about you. You’re the most confusing, interesting woman I’ve ever met. You’re a walking oxymoron all the time, and I never stop wanting to hear all the crazy shit you have to say.”

I looked into his black eyes and realized I had to make a decision there would be no turning back from.