I was still upset.

I wasn’t necessarily mad at Calloway for what he did. I wasn’t angry that he still wanted that kind of intense sexual relationship. If anything, I felt guilty that I couldn’t give it to him. When I saw Jet and Cynthia going at it, it did turn me on. The way she wanted him so much, allowed him to possess her like that, really was a turn-on.

But I hated watching him hurt her.

I hate hearing the crack of the whip against her skin.

I hated seeing him have so much power over her.

I would never forget what it was like to have my freedom taken away, to have my life in the hands of someone else. Being at someone’s mercy was the worst thing in the world, and I absolutely despised it. Even if Calloway was the one holding the reins, it brought back so many painful memories.

Calloway would never understand.

When I ran away, I promised myself I would never allow anyone to treat me that way again. When I met Hank and he pulled his tricks, I fought back and never gave up. If I allowed Calloway to do this to me, I was afraid of the repercussions for my psyche.

I never allowed myself to be damaged goods, to let myself become swallowed in self-pity. I was a strong woman who didn’t quit. I had to keep going, to remain positive until the very end.

But these conversations brought out the worst in me.

At the end of the workday, Calloway arrived at my office, silent with his announcement. It was difficult to tell if he was in a good mood or a bad mood at this time of day since he rarely said anything.

His silence was impossible to ignore, so I packed my things and walked out with him. The office seemed to be back to normal like it was before they found out Calloway and I were an item. We didn’t hold hands or show affection at the office. Even in the elevator, Calloway kept his hands to himself.

We spent the drive home sitting on opposite sides of the car. Calloway looked out his window, and I looked out mine. We hadn’t had sex in a few days, which was our new record. Even when I was on my period, that didn’t hold him at bay. I was certain he was getting anxious, and I was anxious too. That first step was difficult to take, where we would move forward and forget about the last time we were naked together.

We walked inside the house, and I slipped off my heels by the door. They killed my feet every day, but they looked so good with everything I wore that I had to keep wearing them.

Calloway slipped off his jacket and hung it on the coatrack. He walked up behind me and rested his hands on my arm, gripping me gently.

I froze in place, forgetting to breathe.

He rested his forehead against the back of my head, his gentle breaths falling on the back of my neck. His fingers were callused against my skin, but they were warm and inviting. His touch was nothing like it was in the playroom at Ruin. This touch was gentle, full of affection, just the way I liked. “I need to make love to you.” He pressed his lips against the back of my neck, a kiss as light as a feather.

A thrill immediately shot down my spine. My body came to life after the last two days of dormancy. Like he’d never hurt me, I suddenly craved him with urgency. The second his lips were on me, I felt that shot of ecstasy, the rush I only felt when he touched me.

I tilted my head back against his shoulder and exposed my neck, wanting more of his mouth on me.

He took the offering and kissed my neck and my jawline, his stubble rubbing against me as he devoured me. His kisses were slow and purposeful but full of undeniable passion. He squeezed me with his strong hands then wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me into his chest as he kissed me harder.

Now I was desperate for his mouth on mine. My skin wanted more of his caresses, but my mouth was the one in charge. I craned my neck despite the discomfort and kissed him over my shoulder. He kissed me harder once he had my mouth. He yanked me into his body, pressing his hard cock right against my ass.

Like I’d never been upset at all, I wanted him more than I ever had.

We took our time getting up the stairs. Sometimes he pinned me against the wall in the hallway and kissed me because he was too impatient to wait until we reached the bedroom. Another article of clothing was removed and dropped to the floor, forming a trail throughout the house.

By the time we entered the bedroom, we were both naked and anxious. He got me on the bed with my back to the mattress. While he wasn’t as carnal as he was the last time we fooled around, he was still aggressive and desperate. He made me feel wanted, desired. I was vanilla and I would always be vanilla, but he still craved the plain flavor.

He pinned my legs back with his arms behind my knees, opening me wide so he could enjoy me as thoroughly as possible. He held his massive frame above mine with the strength of his arms. He was a sight to behold, a man so sexy it was hard to believe.

The head of his cock found my entrance like it had a mind of its own. He stretched me wide apart, making my eyes sting with tears because I realized how much I’d missed his throbbing cock inside me.

He watched my eyes water but understood what the tears meant. He gave me his entire length then closed his eyes as he moaned, feeling the same surge of joy. His balls slapped against my ass with his initial thrust, hitting me hard right against my cheeks.

I dug my nails into his ass as I pulled him deep inside me, feeling the pleasure and discomfort his entire length caused. Sometimes I didn’t understand his need to be so violent, to chain me up and slap my ass until I cried. I thought the sex we had was already incredible, already perfect. Could it really get better than this?

He dug one hand into my hair as he began to thrust inside me, claiming my pussy as his all over again. His lips were just inches from mine, but he didn’t kiss me, his warm breaths falling on my skin. I could hear his arousal with every breath he took, could feel his desperation for me every time he thrust inside me.

I wanted to come already, either because Calloway was that good or because it’d been two days since the last time we made love. Before he came along, I was just fine being single and saving myself for the right guy. But now that I’d been with Calloway, I was grouchy when I didn’t get my fix. I was angry when I didn’t get those blissful orgasms that Calloway handed out like candy. I turned into a spoiled brat who needed to always get her way.

I ran my hands down his chest and felt the sweat stick to my fingertips. His muscles tensed and shifted as he moved his body in the sexiest ways. His breathing was harsh with arousal, and the quiet moans he made as he thrust into me made my pussy tense automatically in response. I wanted to keep going for the rest of the night, but I wanted to come. If I did, Calloway wouldn’t last much longer because the expression on my face usually triggered his orgasm. So I held off as long as I could to make it last.

“Let go.” His words came out as a command. “I’ll make you come as many times as you want, sweetheart.”

Calloway knew me better than I realized. He could read my mind and understand my body even better than I could. He gave me a hard kiss, full of tongue and passion, and pounded me into the bed so I would be forced to explode.

And I did.

I dug my nails into his back as I came around his cock, shaking with an explosion that gripped me by the throat. I screamed so loud I hurt my own ears. My pussy tightened around him as my come gushed all over his length, dripping down to his balls.

The pleasure was so good I became light-headed, floating above the clouds as I enjoyed the exquisite tenderness between my legs. The ecstasy compensated for the dry spell we went through, making up for the lack of physical bliss we deprived ourselves of over the past few days. “God, I love you…” I meant those words in many different ways, but each one was sincere. I loved him because he was a good man with a big heart. But I also loved how amazing he was when he was between my legs.

A quiet moan erupted from deep in the back of his throat, his ego obviously doubling in size. “Don’t make me come, sweetheart. You know how much I want to.” He slowed his pace and rocked into me gently, moving through my slickness. He usually changed positions after he made me come the first time, but now he stayed on top of me, rocking me hard enough to make my tits shake up and down.

He leaned down and pressed his lips to mine, kissing me slowly, bringing my arousal back up to top speed after a few seductive minutes. He sucked my bottom lip into his mouth then rubbed his nose against mine, teasing me before his mouth was on mine once again.

God, he was hot.

He pinned my legs back farther then changed the angle, making his pelvic bone rub right against my nub. He applied the right kind of friction and made my clit throb with pleasure. My pussy somehow became even wetter, even tighter.

Calloway could sense the difference. “Your pussy is fucking incredible.”

That was only because he was the sexiest man on the planet.

He increased his pace because he knew I was on the edge of another explosion. He was driving me home, getting me to the finish line so he could join me. “Show me that O, sweetheart.”

I reacted on command, and I came all around him, screaming again like the first orgasm never happened. I dug my fingers into arms and held on as the sensation rocked through me, burning hot like lightning just struck me. It was so good I wanted to cry, so powerful I wanted to collapse.

Calloway kept pounding into me as he approached his climax.

I pressed my hand against his chest and made a very selfish demand. “One more…” I was lucky enough that I had a man who could make me come at all, and I shouldn’t take it for granted. But I was greedy after two days of nothing. I was so hard up I wasn’t even sure why I stopped him from spanking me in the playroom. All the pain in the world would be worth having him inside me.

He clenched his jaw like he was annoyed that he had to restrain himself. His eyes bored into mine, their usual look of intensity shining bright. But he didn’t release himself, somehow finding the strength to hold it together for a little longer. “What my woman wants, she gets.”

* * *

“How did your date go?” I asked as I sat across from Christopher at the deli. He picked me up for lunch while Calloway’s assistant picked up something for him. He was busy at the office, so he didn’t have time to join us.

“She was so boring. Almost fell asleep.”

“Almost fell asleep on a date?” I asked incredulously.

“Yep.” He took a bite of his sandwich and chewed. “She was that boring, if you can believe it.”

“Actually, I can’t.”

“She doesn’t have friends or hobbies. She just goes to work and then goes home. She’s hot as hell, but that’s all she’s got going for her.”

“So when dinner was over, you just went home?”

“No.” Christopher took another bite and scarfed down his food quickly. “We fucked, and then I went home.”

I rolled my eyes.

“I told you she was hot.”

“So she couldn’t have been that boring.”

“Well, there’s no talking during sex, so it’s pretty hard to be boring.” He ripped open his bag of chips and put them on the table between us so we could share. “What’s up with you and the Hulk?”

“The Hulk? He’s not green.”

“But he turns green when he’s angry. I’ve seen him in action.”

“Things are good…” I sipped my iced tea then dove my hand into the chip bag.

“Oh no.” Christopher saw right through that. “What happened?”

I told him about the fiasco at Ruin.

“Rome, just do it. You can tell the guy is really into it.”

“I know he is…but I don’t want to.”

“The guy wouldn’t have made a move unless he thought you might be into it.”

I didn’t mention all the details about Jet and Cynthia. That was a little too awkward to talk about.

“He’s given up a lot for you. I don’t see why it’s so difficult for you to do something for him—even if you don’t like it.”

“Do I really need to explain my reasoning?” I didn’t want to repeat myself for the fifth time.

“Look, I get what you’re saying. But relationships are about sacrifice, right?”

“But I’m not willing to sacrifice everything I believe in. I’ve been knocked around too many times in my lifetime. I don’t want to go through it again just because my hot boyfriend is into weird shit.”

“He wouldn’t be knocking you around,” Christopher corrected.

“Fine. He would whip me like an adulteress in the middle of the town square,” I said sarcastically. “Much better.”

“Don’t be a brat, alright? It’s not like that either.”

“You’re only saying this because you’re into weird shit too, Christopher.”

“Maybe,” he said in agreement. “But if you don’t keep your man happy, he’ll go looking for it elsewhere…”

The insinuation made me run cold.

“I’m not saying Cal is a cheater. Seems like a really honorable guy. But one day, he’s gonna get frustrated and leave. That’s how men are. We need a woman to keep us fed and keep us satisfied. If you do those two things, we won’t go anywhere. We’re very simple creatures.”

Christopher said a lot of stupid things, but that wasn’t one of them. When men didn’t get what they needed, it was natural for them to look for it elsewhere. “But he is satisfied with me.” I knew Calloway wanted to do those things sometimes, not all the time. If that were the case, we wouldn’t have lasted this long.

“I’m sure he is—for now. Just think about it, Rome.”

“I already have.”

Christopher knew I could be just as stubborn as he was, so he dropped the subject. “How do you find a nice woman in this city? Someone who’s super sexy but super awesome too. I’m not a big fan of online dating, so I haven’t gone there.”

“We’re in New York. There are amazing women everywhere.”

“Yeah, but I need a woman who’s wife material.”

“What’s wife material?”

He took another bite as he considered the question. “I don’t care if she’s rich or poor, but I want her to be doing something with her life, you know? Be passionate about something.”

“Again, lots of women meet that criteria.”

“And she’s gotta cook, and not just Top Ramen.”

“That shouldn’t be hard to do.”

“And she’s gotta be sexy, but not vain about it.”

Most pretty women I knew were like that, so that might be difficult. “That might be a little hard to find.”

“Well, I’d rather have a super awesome chick who’s a six than a boring-ass chick who’s a ten…so I guess looks are negotiable.”

“You know what you should do?”

“Hmm?” he asked.

“Just go out and meet people. When you find the right woman, you’ll know. Don’t make a list and expect her to fit each criteria. Calloway doesn’t fit all of my criteria, but that didn’t stop me from falling in love with him.”

“Well…he doesn’t meet one extremely important item on your list. And it seems like it’s been a recurring problem.”

I didn’t want to live without Calloway. My heart bled for him in ways it wouldn’t bleed for anyone else. Being madly in love with him made me accept his flaws, no matter how disturbing they were. “We’ll make it work. I don’t know how, but we will.”

“Maybe I can meet someone at Ruin. You know, a kinky chick.”

I couldn’t picture Christopher with any of the women there. If he wanted a wife, he needed someone who wasn’t willing to have a chain around her neck. “I think you would have a good time but wouldn’t want to settle down with her.”

“Hmm…that’s true.”

We’d never talked extensively about Christopher’s love life. Ever since he decided he wanted to settle down and get married, that was all we ever talked about. Christopher didn’t seem desperate, but he definitely seemed anxious. “When it’s meant to happen, it’ll happen.”

“Hopefully. Just hope I didn’t wait too long that all the good ones are gone.”

“You haven’t been out with anyone that you really liked?”

“Well…” He dug his hand into the chip bag. “There was this one woman, Kim. She was pretty amazing. Beautiful, cool, she had the whole package. But I slept with her and never called her again…ignored her phone calls. She’d never give me another chance.”

“How long ago was this?”

“Like…six months ago.”

Yeah, she’d probably moved on by now. “Why did you blow her off?”

“I really liked the connection, but I was so anti-commitment that I didn’t even bother. Since I wasn’t looking for anything serious, I just tuned everything out. I didn’t start thinking about how awesome she was until recently.”

If it were me, I probably wouldn’t give Christopher another chance. It would make me come off as a desperate, something I refused to do. If this Kim chick was anything worth chasing after, she was probably the same way. “Six months is a long time.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure she’s long gone.”

We ate the rest of our lunch in silence until every single piece of food was long gone. Christopher eyed his watch like he needed to get back to work soon. “I’ll walk you back to the office and head on my way.”

“I don’t need you to walk me, Christopher. Hank is no longer a problem.” In fact, he was a complete pussy.

“I know Cal. He’d be ticked if I let you walk on your own.”

“You guys both need to accept the fact that I’m perfectly safe now. Let’s go back to normal.” Christopher and I walked out of the deli and headed to my building a few blocks away. “And my building isn’t even on your way.”

“I could use the exercise.” He walked with his hands in the pockets of his slacks.

“I still don’t want things to be this way. I can’t remember the last time I was alone—truly alone.”

“No one likes being alone, so consider yourself lucky.” He walked me until we reached the outside of my building. He looked up at the large floor-to-ceiling windows then raised his hand for a high five. “See you later, sis.”

I smiled then smacked my palm against his. “Good luck with the ladies.”

“I don’t need any luck.” He waggled his eyebrows. “But thanks.”