I blink rapidly and try to focus on what my aunt just said, but it’s like another person spoke the words that came out of her mouth. I pull my hand from her tight grip and try to keep my voice calm. “You hired someone to make Nathan cheat on me?” Horror and disbelief fill me. “How could you do that to me? I ended our relationship over a lie.”
Sebastian’s hand falls away from my shoulder, but I don’t let it bother me; I’m numb with anger.
My aunt fists her hand on the bed. “He did sleep with her. Though it was after you left him. I’ve always told you, Talia. It’s just you and me. I’m the only one who will be here for you. Who will always be here for you. When you got engaged, I knew I had to do something. Nathan would’ve ruined you, just like your father ruined my sister.”
“You told me he left us.”
She nods briskly and grips my fisted hand. “Your father left your poor mother with a newborn. Weak-willed man! Tasha was so depressed. When she tried to take her life, I was there for her. But she just couldn’t let him go. I didn’t stop her the next time.”
I wrap my arm around my stomach, feeling ill as I try to process it. “How could you not help your own sister?”
“I didn’t make her take the pills, Talia!” My aunt’s face flushes. “You were supposed to be mine. Your father met me first, but he fell in love with Tasha and gave her a baby. Her life should’ve been mine, and yet even though she had you, she couldn’t see past her own sphere.”
Tears stream down my face as I stare at her in shock.
My silence must’ve seemed like understanding, because my aunt pats my arm. “Don’t you see, I couldn’t let a man destroy you the way your father did your mother. I wanted you to go places, be independent.”
She heaves a sigh and waves her hand, like doing so sweeps her decades’ old confession away. “It was for the best, Talia, but I didn’t expect the girl I hired to fall in love with your fiancé. She called me a few weeks ago, wanting to know more about you. Since I hadn’t seen much of you these last few months, I wondered if you were seeing Nathan again and that’s what prompted her call, so I told her something she could use to tip the scale in her favor. If Nathan’s not in your life, maybe your success as an author is what drove her to reach out to me.”
“Are you saying this Paige person is the one stalking Talia?” Sebastian’s tone is crisp, all business. “What information did you tell her?”
She looks at me, as if for permission. I stare blankly at her. I want to think she is having a true slip from reality, that the pain meds are giving her nonexistent memories and none of this is real. But as my mind reconciles the blonde server I almost bumped into at the kick off party with the quick image of the girl I saw messing with Nathan, and then Cass’ later comment about Nathan dressing down a female server at the party, my aching heart knows that I’m finally hearing the truth. Is the combination of the meds on top of her condition bringing all this out of my aunt? Aunt Vanessa knows nothing about my past, certainly nothing that could destroy a relationship. “What did you tell Paige?”
Her gaze slides to Sebastian, then back to me. “You’re okay with me telling him about the drugs?”
Blood drains from my face. I jump to my feet, my whole body quaking. “You knew?”
My aunt snorts. “I’m not an idiot, Talia. I needed to get us out of that situation and the fastest way was to get through nursing school. How could Walt pay for it when he hadn’t worked a carpentry job in over a year?”
I jam my hands in my hair and dig my fingers into my scalp. When Sebastian grips my elbow and tries to calm me down, I jerk from his grasp and lean close to her, hissing, “So was it okay with you that Hayes got his rocks off by violating me on the side too?”
My aunt’s eyes widen and her bottom lip quivers. “I didn’t know, Talia. I knew you delivered bags. I would never let anyone hurt you,” she says, reaching for me.
I jerk away from her, whispering, “What kind of monster are you?”
Aunt Vanessa’s eyes narrow slightly. “I guess I’m the kind of monster who protected you.” She quickly looks at Sebastian standing behind me, then returns her attention to me. “Does he know you’ve killed a man?”
It’s bad enough that Sebastian has just learned all about my fucked up family, but now that he knows my darkest secret, I want to shrink into the floor. “It was an accident,” I whisper.
“Was it, Talia?” Aunt Vanessa’s eyebrows pull together. “I saw the mess you left behind in our apartment that night. I know how much you loved Amelia.”
I throw my hands out. “Walt was wacked out on drugs. He shoved Amelia too hard, and the way she fell and hit her head killed her. When I wouldn’t go along with his plan to say her death was an accident, because I wanted him charged for being under the influence, he threatened me. Not an hour before, he sat right there, passed out in the same room, while Hayes violated me. I was so angry that he was more worried about covering up his part in Amelia’s death than mourning her that I dumped an entire container of those stupid pills on him. When he came after me for destroying their drugs, I went for the gun to protect myself.”
My aunt nods slowly. “I got home and saw Amelia and Walt’s bodies and the drugs strewn everywhere. Then I noticed your shoe print in Walt’s blood and I put enough together to know you were in trouble. I didn’t know about Hayes, Talia, I swear to you, but I knew he’d blame you for destroying his drugs, so I took care of it. I was the one who blew up our apartment. Cleaned up your mess…to save you. I protected you, like I always have, because you have always come first, and you always will.”
My aunt’s twisted mindfuck idea of protecting me leaves a heavy silence in the room. I’m afraid to even look at Sebastian, and he hasn’t tried to touch me since I shook him off. Or was it since my aunt told him I killed Walt? I jump at the sound of the door swinging open. Unaware of the tension in the room, the incoming nurse looks at her watch and says, “My patient has one more test for the day, folks.”
As Sebastian and I start to move toward the door, my aunt leans forward in her bed, her brow furrowed. “I was surprised when I saw Paige working at your kickoff event. At the time I just thought it was an odd coincidence. Was Nathan there?” When I nod numbly, her gaze shifts to Sebastian. “Find Paige. That deranged girl has to be behind the stalking and attacks. She hated that Nathan never gave up on Talia. Have her arrested and protect my niece.”
As soon as we walk into the hall, Sebastian pulls me over to a quiet spot near the stairwell. “Do you know what Paige looks like?”
I really don’t want to discuss how I’ve seen her, but I swallow my pride. “Yes, I walked in on her messing around with Nathan once at work. That’s why I couldn’t place her face. I’d only seen her once.”
He dips his head and looks at me. “So she was the blonde you saw at the event?”
When I nod, he pulls out his phone and calls a police contact. “We have a suspect with motive. Please have your men pick up Paige Hansen for questioning.” A pause. “Yes, attempted murder of Talia Murphy. I’ll meet you at the precinct. I want to be in the room when she’s questioned.” He eyes me as the man’s voice rumbles. “Fine, at least let me listen in. Yeah, yeah…lawyer bullshit. Just pick her up. I’m coming.”
He hangs up and says, “Are you okay?”
Too many emotions are racing through me. My brain feels like it’s exploding, but my body is numb. I still can’t believe what my aunt did. How she destroyed my life in so many ways. I’ve never felt more alone. I blink, not even sure how to answer him.
Sebastian rests his hand on my shoulder. “Why didn’t you tell me about shooting Walt?”
The way he asks the question, his tone is very careful. “You knew, didn’t you?”
He shrugs. “I learned about the fire another way, but it was enough to help me narrow down where you lived. Once I got ahold of the police report and crime scene analysis of your apartment, I put the fact that a single bullet was found wedged into a far wall and the medical examiner noted something the size of a bullet had damaged one of the male’s ribs, together with everything else you’ve told me since…so yeah, I figured you might have shot him.” He pauses, then exhales his frustration. “Were you ever going to tell me?”
“That I murdered a man? Or how about the fact that I’ve done things I’m disgusted by? Does it matter that I did it to survive?” I meet his gaze and the disappointment there rips at my heart. “The condemning look in your eyes is exactly why I didn’t tell you, Sebastian. I didn’t want to lose you, but I guess it’s too late for that.”
When I start to walk away, he grabs my arm, his expression hard, furious. “You’ve spent all this time worrying about losing me, when you’re the one who’s always running. All I’ve ever wanted was for you to fucking trust me enough to tell me everything, no matter what.”
“You mean like you’ve told me everything?” I shoot back. “You should’ve told me about your colorblindness, but you held back. And why did you leave the Navy if it wasn’t because of your vision impairment? Did you share? You could’ve, but you didn’t. And for the record, how am I supposed to believe that I’m the only one who’s ever been to your apartment when you conveniently whip out a pair of handcuffs at a place I wasn’t supposed to be, and no one but you ever visits? As much as I’d like to blindly believe, Sebastian, I guess that old saying is true; trust goes both ways.”
He stares at me, jaw muscle jumping, then says in a clipped tone, “I’m going to the station. I think it’s best if you stay here in the waiting room.”
When Sebastian slams the Exit door open and heads down the stairs, I sag against the wall. God, could I have fucked up any more with him? How can I trust the man so easily with my life, but not with my heart? I want to bang my head against the wall for being such an idiot. The one thing I worried about the most, him discovering everything about my past, isn’t what destroyed us. It was my own inability to trust him with it.
Charlie arrives a few minutes later, and when he sees me crying in the hall, he tugs me into a chair in the waiting room. I let him comfort me, because I’m truly at a loss as to why I’m crying so hard. Is it for losing Sebastian? For losing my faith and trust in my aunt? I can’t explain any of my family’s fucked-up scenario to the sweet man sitting next to me, so I don’t even try.
While I’m dabbing my eyes with a tissue, my phone buzzes with a text from Sebastian.
PainInMyAss: Paige confessed to sending threatening letters and to breaking into your apartment. Still in interrogation.
His text is cold and impersonal. Just the facts. I sniff back my tears and send him a “thank you for the update” response. Then, scroll through my contacts and type Nathan a quick text.
Me: I just want to say that I believe you about that intern. I don’t think I ever really said that. No hard feelings.
My phone instantly rings with a call from Nathan. I exhale a heavy sigh and send the call to voicemail, already regretting trying to absolve some of my guilt.
Patting my shoulder, Charlie says, “You’ve had a long week. Why don’t you go home and take a warm bath. Visiting hours will be over soon. I’ll let your aunt know that you’ll be back tomorrow morning.”
I stare at him, unsure what to say. Will I be back? How can I even be around her, let alone trust anything she says now? But what if the doctors diagnose her with something debilitating? What if it’s something terminal? I’m her only family. Numb all over, I just nod and stand. “Thank you for being such a good person, Charlie.”
He stands too and hugs me. “Don’t worry, Talia. I’m sure Vanessa will pull through whatever this is. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Now that my stalker has been arrested, the idea of taking a long bath in my own tub sounds instantly appealing. Even though the realization that I won’t be going back to Sebastian’s apartment depresses the hell out of me, I decide going home is better than the hotel. I’ll definitely be taking Cass up on her movie and ice cream marathon promise as soon as she gets back.
Nathan tries to call me again as I hail a ride home. When a cab drives up, I turn off the audible alerts and drop my phone into my purse. The sound of it hitting the handcuffs I swiped at Sebastian’s before we left—I couldn’t stand the idea he might use them on someone else—is just another sad reminder of what Sebastian and I could’ve had.