Chapter Five
Greyson slept hard and deep, the dreams fuzzier tonight than they’d been in a long time. They seemed almost like a movie, playing on a screen instead of inside him. Then things changed and the pain began, bringing the nightmares with it.
The desert was cold, and stinging pain came up from the sands beneath him, shooting up his legs. He tried to escape it, but the sand gave way beneath him and every step he tried to take found him sinking deeper. Something was chasing him. Something that lived in the sand, and it wanted him. He clambered harder, trying to get up over the sandbank, but it was falling back in on him now and he was being covered in sand, smothered by it.
He tried to call out, tried to yell, but his mouth was full of sand.
Something grabbed his arm and shook it.
“Snap out of it, Greyson.”
He opened his mouth to ask for help and more sand poured into him, and his leg was caught, sunk into the sand to his thigh. A monster gnawed on his leg, tearing the flesh from the bone.
“Wake up!”
He was hauled up out of the sand, those teeth tearing at his leg.
“Greyson!” It was the growl in the voice that caught his attention, and his eyes flew open to find Luke leaning over him and shaking him.
He gasped as pain shot through his leg, his mouth staying open on a wordless cry. Oh fuck, that hurt. He reached for his thigh, unable to vocalize how bad it was.
Grunting, Luke flipped him over onto his belly like he weighed nothing. Before Greyson could protest that this wasn’t going to help—he’d obviously been lying with his leg tucked under him or something—Luke dug into his thigh.
He cried out. The touch was just as painful, though the warmth from Luke’s fingers made a difference.
“Shh. Shh. I’m trying,” Luke murmured.
“Hurts so bad,” he admitted, barely able to exhale with everything in him so tight.
Luke continued to massage. “This would be better without your pants.”
“My legs are...fucked up.” Though at the moment he would give almost anything to relieve the pain. Tears prickled at his eyes.
“I figured as much, given what I saw at the cabin and that you need crutches to walk. I’m not going to scream and run away if I see a few scars, Grey.”
“I don’t even know you, man.” But somehow that made it easier.
“You want the massage or not?” growled Luke, hands resting on Greyson’s legs.
Greyson glanced over his shoulder, and he had to admit, Luke looked torn up over his pain.
“Yes!” Please, fuck. Don’t stop. He hurt so fucking badly.
“Then let’s get the pants off you.” Luke grabbed the waistband of Greyson’s sweats at his sides and began to tug them off.
He hurt too much to do anything but let Luke pull his sweats down and off. Then the massage began in earnest, strong fingers digging into his muscles. He gritted his teeth, baring them, as his muscles fought Luke’s fingers. The rest of his body had gone tight as it tried to protect him from the pain shooting through his leg.
“Breathe through it, Greyson.” Luke kept working him relentlessly. Greyson had to appreciate that, even if it still hurt like an S.O.B.
“I—Fuck!” He didn’t know about breathing through it. He panted hard, trying to focus on something other than the pain.
“Shh...” Luke breathed on him or something and the pain backed off. Only a little, but it was enough to let him breathe. Luke’s voice felt like a refuge within the hurting.
Greyson blinked once, then yielded to those strong fingers. He unclenched the rest of his body as the pain localized to his thigh. It felt like he was slowly melting. Luke kept massaging, insisting that every one of his muscles ease, not just his thigh. Unbelievably, even his thigh stopped hurting so badly as Luke rubbed it and the other thigh, too.
He hadn’t been this pain-free since before the landmine. Hell, he wasn’t even sure he still had legs at the moment.
He was afraid to say anything, because what if Luke stopped?
Thank God, Luke didn’t. The man had magical fingers and Greyson thought he could do this forever. It had been so long since the pain had been this tolerable that he barely could remember how to breathe. Only now it was because of something good instead of something bad.
Luke ran a single hand along his spine; there were surprisingly few calluses on Luke’s hand. “Easy now. Don’t tighten back up and ruin all the work I’ve done.”
“No. No, I’m scared to breathe.”
The hand on his back pushed beneath his T-shirt, and moved slowly up and down again, leaving tingles. “Stop thinking and let your body do what it has to.”
“It’s forgotten, you know? It doesn’t feel like my body anymore.”
“That’s not right, Grey. You need to reconnect with your body. Concentrate on this.” Luke worked along the bones of his spine, pressing against them.
Greyson swore he felt himself stretching, getting taller.
Then Luke ran his hand back and forth across Greyson’s shoulders, and lower, over his rib cage. “Breathe,” Luke whispered, and the sound was like another touch.
“Breathe,” he repeated as his entire body went heavy.
“That’s right.” That hand moved along his back, long touches that dragged over him. “Okay, I’m going to flip you, get the front of your thighs.”
It was the only warning he had before Luke turned him. Fuck, the guy was strong.
Then the wonderful touches began again. Greyson thought if he could bottle the way this felt and use it on his aches on a daily basis, the pain would never be awful again. Luke’s thumbs eased along his inner thighs a few times and suddenly, with the pain gone now, it hit him how they were half-naked together, Luke’s hands all over him, making him feel good.
His cock jerked and began to fill. Oh God. Oh fuck. Maybe Luke wouldn’t notice.
Whether or not Luke had noticed, Greyson was now hyperaware of every touch—hell, of every breath that Luke took, that he took. Was he breathing too loudly? Was Luke? He could feel Luke’s thigh resting against his leg, so damn close to his hard-enough-to-cut-diamonds cock.
Then he realized Luke was hard, too. He couldn’t miss the way the man’s underwear tented out. That was one impressive erection.
Had he really just thought that?
He licked his lips, trying to figure out how to shift away, how to hide his own hard-on before Luke noticed. Greyson stared up into the darkness, at the barest shadows dancing there, cast by embers from the fire. He tried to mentally strip, clean, and rebuild his weapon, but his thoughts kept drifting to what it would feel like if Luke were to do something about his erection. What if Luke massaged his cock instead of the rest of him?
He closed his eyes and worked on making his breathing slow and even. Luke would leave if he thought Greyson had fallen back asleep, right?
“Well, this is kind of awkward, isn’t it?” Luke’s fingers brushed the base of Greyson’s balls.
He hissed as pleasure rocketed through him, and his muscles tightened back up again. “I’m sorry.” Dammit. He knew better than to get hard near another guy. He’d spent years keeping his preferences to himself.
“For what?”
Greyson waved vaguely toward his errant cock. “That.” God, how embarrassing. How could Luke be so casual about this whole situation?
“I’m hard, too.” Luke palmed his own cock through his underwear. “It happens.”
Whoa. He really wasn’t in the army anymore. “I’m used to being around guys who would kick my ass for getting a hard-on like this.”
Luke’s voice was gruff. “Well, you aren’t around them anymore. I think it’s hot that you like my hands.” He smiled and brushed against Greyson’s balls again. “Want me to jerk you off? Might help you sleep.”
Holy fuck. No way was this gorgeous stud offering to jerk him off. What if Luke could tell he hadn’t done this before? And what if things were weird afterward?
He teetered on the edge, not entirely sure which way he’d go.
Luke leaned in, and he could feel Luke’s hard-on pressing against his hip. “You can tell me to stop anytime if it’s too much or if you don’t like it. I’m assuming it’s been a long time for you.”
Luke had no idea. Greyson looked into his eyes and saw steadiness, kindness. Heat. He nodded. “A really long time. But I want you to.”
And then he was getting his first kiss. Luke slowly traced Greyson’s lips with his tongue, slipping it in when Greyson gasped. He couldn’t have known that he would feel it through his whole body as well as on his lips.
Luke rubbed his hand along Greyson’s cheek, cupping it and tilting his head. Luke’s tongue pushed deeper into his mouth, moving inside him. He trembled, reacting to the new sensations. Shit. What was he supposed to do with his hands?
Luke pulled away slightly. “Breathe.” He put his hand on Greyson’s forehead. “Breathe.”
Greyson closed his eyes, and suddenly it was the easiest thing in the world to find Luke’s rhythm and breathe with him.
“You’re not a soldier anymore,” Luke said quietly. “You’re a man in the forest trying to deal with his demons. You don’t have to deal with them anymore.”
“I wish that were true.”
“What I meant was you don’t have to deal with them alone anymore. I’m bigger and scarier than any demons, personal or otherwise.”
“Like you want to be dealing with my shit.” Luke was as much a loner as he was, maybe even more of one.
“I could have taken you back to civilization instead of bringing you here, but I didn’t. And I could have let you lie out here and deal with your nightmares and your pain on your own, but I didn’t.” Luke stared into his eyes, big body keeping him warm. “Now you’re here and we’re snowed in until...” Luke shrugged. “April-ish.”
“April. It’s October.” That was crazy. And what if Luke decided come December that he wanted his space back?
“Once the snow starts, we stay put until the snow melts again. So maybe April, maybe May, it could be March, but probably not.”
“Then where do you go?” Greyson asked.
“I don’t go anywhere. I live out here full time.”
“Is it better in the winter or summer here?” Talking seemed far safer than kissing.
“You’ll have to wait and see. But in the winter, we won’t be disturbed. It’s just you and me for the foreseeable future.” Luke waited a couple of beats, then kissed him once more.
Greyson found himself opening his lips, letting Luke in again. Luke slid his tongue along the roof of Greyson’s mouth, then touched his tongue. Greyson took a shaky inhalation, hands opening and closing around Luke’s arms. Then Luke teased his tongue, like he was inviting it into Luke’s mouth. Greyson touched the tip of his tongue to Luke’s, then followed it back for a moment, tasting Luke before pulling back into his own mouth. It was incredible, how such a small thing could feel so big. Maybe it was because it was the first time he’d kissed like this or maybe it was because Luke was so strong, but there was no denying this was a man he was kissing.
Deepening the kiss, Luke pressed him back against the couch cushions and Greyson shivered again, his cock hard where it lay against Luke’s hip.
He didn’t want to stop, but the weight of years of denying himself pressed down on him. He pulled away from the kiss, staring up into Luke’s eyes.
“Don’t worry,” Luke murmured. “I want to make you feel good. We can stop at any time.”
“I don’t want to stop yet.” No, he wanted more of these amazing kisses, of this connection he’d never had before. If he’d truly known what he was missing, Greyson wasn’t sure he could have denied himself.
Luke reached out and cupped Greyson’s cock.
Fuck! It made him gasp, made his cock feel even harder, like it was going to split the skin. Hell, Greyson could feel Luke’s touches in his belly and his balls. Luke rolled Greyson’s cock through his underwear, watching his face.
He groaned, hips beginning to rock. He wanted more.
“You’re allowed to take what you need.” Luke rubbed, which encouraged Greyson to keep humping up into Luke’s hand. “I’ve got you. You’re stunning.”
Greyson glared at him. “Look at me. At my scars. They blew me up.”
“And you lived. Don’t let the mine be an excuse not to prove you’re alive now.” Luke growled, and it echoed slightly around the room. The sound rumbled inside of Greyson, like it was physical, not aural.
Greyson’s eyelids got heavy and his lips parted as he arched again. Luke slipped his tongue into Greyson’s mouth. He kept rumbling and the sound felt like it was filling Greyson. Luke squeezed his package tighter, rubbing the tip of his cock through his underwear.
When Greyson moaned, Luke’s eyes closed and his hand moved faster. He pressed his lips to Greyson’s neck, and sucked. The agile, wet tongue on his skin, and the strong hand moving over his cock were more than Greyson could have ever dreamed of.
“Oh my God.” He gasped and jerked up toward Luke.
“It’s Luke, but I accept the compliment.” Luke pressed the heel of his hand against Greyson’s cock, rubbing harder now, the touch somehow exactly what Greyson needed. The scent of desire filled the room and he realized that was him and Luke, that smell.
Luke tugged at Greyson’s underwear, working them down. Greyson probably should have protested, but he couldn’t remember why. As soon as Luke had Greyson’s cock exposed, he pounced, pulling Greyson’s cock into his mouth. There was no hesitation to the move, Luke freely offering him this immense gift.
Lightning shot through Greyson, the pleasure intense and enormous, as was the knowledge that Luke was doing this for him, accepting him scars and all. It was too big to contain. He stiffened and shot, nearly in the same motion.
Luke sucked it all down—sucked him down—mouth still on him, still pulling. Greyson stayed hard, and his need barely felt assuaged. How did that happen?
Luke growled deep in his chest, and Greyson’s cock jerked, spurted. Oh God. This was... It was huge. His broken body was suddenly working again.
“Aches,” he said, not sure if he wanted Luke to stop or if he was afraid that Luke would.
Luke used his tongue on Greyson’s slit, and he arched, keening. Luke circled the head with his tongue, then sucked again.
Greyson gasped. “Sensitive. You have to stop.”
Luke lifted his head. “What?”
“It’s so sensitive.”
“That’s a good thing, Grey.” Luke kissed the tip of Greyson’s cock.
“I feel raw inside.”
“Different from how you usually feel, though, isn’t it? Better?”
Greyson closed his eyes, but he nodded. He was out of his depth and he’d eventually need to tell Luke the truth about his lack of experience, but there was something hopeful, something good in what they were doing.
Luke nuzzled his cock again, rubbing it along his cheek until he found Greyson’s balls. Those he licked and sucked, first one, and then the other. Greyson spread, ass moving on the couch cushion. Humming, Luke rubbed his cheek against the inside of Greyson’s thigh, dragging along the skin.
He stiffened. “There’s lots of scars.” Too many.
“Like I said, I’ve already seen them. Besides, scars don’t scare me.”
“No? Because they sure fucked with me.” They still were, really. An ugly reminder of what he’d been through.
“Let me see properly.”
“They’re ugly. Sore.” Greyson let Luke shift him, though.
“It’s going to be all right.” Luke tugged on his underwear again, working them down the rest of the way.
Greyson knew the ropes of scars were brutal, that the muscles were misshapen from surgery. Luke began to touch, fingers digging in carefully. Luke had already touched him there, had seen, too, but now he was looking. Greyson winced, hiding his burning cheeks in his arm.
“You don’t need to be embarrassed. You got these being a hero, Greyson. They’re a symbol of bravery, of strength.” Luke kept gently working his muscles, his scarred flesh, growling steadily.
“Are you mad?”
“What?” Luke blinked up at Greyson, clearly surprised. “Mad? No, not at all. Why?”
“That noise. It’s sexy, but you might be mad.” Greyson felt his cheeks go even hotter at his own words.
Luke frowned for a moment, then understanding dawned on his face. “Oh, the growling. It’s something I do. I’m not mad.” He grinned suddenly. “You think I’m sexy.”
“I wouldn’t have let you...if I thought you weren’t hot.”
Luke looked like the cat that got the canary, obviously pleased by Greyson’s admission.
“You’re scary hot,” Greyson admitted. “You make me make bad decisions. Sleeping with a roommate is not smart.”
“Upgraded to scary hot. Usually I wouldn’t care, but I like hearing it from you. And I am not a bad decision. I’m probably the best decision you could make.”
“I’m sitting here in a house in the woods, mostly naked with another man.”
“Sounds pretty fucking good to me.” Luke leaned in and pressed their lips together again, bending him back against the couch and leaning against him. It made Greyson feel protected.
Luke deepened the kiss, and Greyson started to get lost in it, the relaxation melting his renewed tension.
Rubbing his hand along Greyson’s badly scarred leg, Luke carefully worked the muscles again, touching the scars, one after the other. Proving Luke wasn’t afraid to touch. Greyson whimpered, curled into Luke with a sigh. It felt good, Luke holding him, sheltering him.
Rumbling softly again, Luke looked down at what his fingers were doing, working the poor muscles and tracing the tangled mess of scars.
“Don’t. They’re awful. Vicious.” Ugly. Proof of how close he’d come to death.
“I told you that they’re a sign of your strength, your heroism, your honor. And they don’t scare me. Or repulse me. What was this?” Luke traced the ragged outline that was left of the tattoo he’d had and Greyson’s skin felt like it was on fire beneath Luke’s fingertips.
“Nothing. A tattoo.”
“Do you have any others?” Luke kept touching it, then shivered.
“No. No, this was one I got with my brother. He passed away—lymphoma.”
“I’m so sorry for your loss. I know how important brothers are.” Luke sounded like he spoke from experience.
“Thank you.” Greyson lost himself in a moment of remembering his brother—how things had been before the cancer, because that disease had stolen his brother from him long before he’d actually died.
“What was the tattoo?” Luke still traced it, as if he were unable to keep his fingers away.
“A fantasy thing—a crest with a dragon. He was into D&D, so he got a dragon’s foot with a claw and I got this. I knew I didn’t want any of the guys in my unit giving me shit.”
Luke kept touching and Greyson’s skin kept tingling.
“Where did you have it done? Who did it?” The more Luke traced what was left of the tattoo, the stronger the tingling sensations became.
“Some dude. Really, I don’t remember his name. Blond and skinny. Like I said, my brother was dying and this was something for us to do together.”
“Huh.” Luke bent and kissed it.
Electricity shot through him and Greyson jerked, pulled away. “Fuck! Sorry. Sorry. Nerves. You must have hit a nerve.”
Luke ran his hand along Greyson’s leg, top to bottom and back up again, soothing now. “I felt it, too. Looks like we have electricity, as well as chemistry.”
“Weird. Must have been static shock, huh?”
“Somehow I think it was more than that.” Luke leaned back in and stole another kiss.
Greyson responded without thinking. Despite his exhaustion, his pain and his belief that there was nothing left for him, Luke made him feel good.
Luke straightened, then leaned back, bringing Greyson with him, carefully maneuvering them both until Luke was lying on the couch with Greyson on top of him. Luke cradled him, hands landing on his ass. Greyson might have protested, because this should have been weird, except Luke had helped him through some of the worst pain he’d had in recent memory and had made him feel incredible on top of that.
He yawned, suddenly exhausted again, his body insisting on rest, on healing sleep.
“It’s okay. Let the relaxation help you to sleep.” Luke’s deep voice was spellbinding. It had to be hypnotizing him.
“No dreams,” he whispered. “Please.”
“No dreams. Just deep, healing sleep.”
“Okay.” He believed. He didn’t know why. It didn’t matter. He needed this, so he believed.
* * *
Luke couldn’t sleep. He adjusted Grey to keep any pressure off his bad leg, then shifted Greyson again to what he thought would be a more comfortable position. This man was his. He didn’t know how he’d missed it when he’d first knocked on Greyson’s—Grey’s—door. Except that he hadn’t been looking for it—hadn’t been looking for his soul mate.
Not now. Not out here in the wilds away from civilization. He hadn’t been expecting it, full stop.
Oh sure, a couple of his brothers had found their soul mates, but when did that ever mean anything? Mark had found his ages ago, and then lost him again. There were no rules on timing when it came to soul mates, as far as he could tell.
Grey had been a man in need of rescuing and rescuing people was what Luke did. He would have brought anyone in the same circumstances home with him. No one else would have begun tugging at him, though, the way Grey did. No one else would have gotten more than a massage. That’s when he’d felt it, their connection.
At first, he hadn’t believed. Goddess, he still wasn’t entirely sure that he did. Even as he thought that maybe it wasn’t so, something inside him said that it was. Crazy as it had been for Grey to have come up here in the middle of nowhere, completely unprepared for the weather, it was a good thing he had. Otherwise they would have never connected.
And that would have been a shame, because as new as it was, Luke already knew, he wouldn’t give this up for anything. Now he had a soul mate to protect. Now he had a purpose.