Chapter Two
Willow
Whispering my goodbyes to Tanya and Hadley, I slip out of the house while Gunnar is talking to his brothers and head straight to my car. Hopefully, I can get out of here without him noticing I am gone. Judging by the way his eyes have followed me all night, it’s doubtful but still worth a try.
Sliding into my car, I strap in and start it up as my mind goes over everything that has happened over the last few hours and the way Gunnar seemed to follow me around all day. I still can’t figure out what in the hell is wrong with him or why in the world he seems to be so interested in me. I haven’t shown the least bit of interest in him. At least, I pretended not to be interested. It’s not that I don’t want him; every woman would want Gunnar Brady. Hell, a nun would willingly strip bare for the man and worship his body all night.
Gunnar is one of the most handsome men I have ever seen. In fact, he may be the sexiest man I’ve ever laid my eyes on. Tall, so tall, probably closing in on six-foot four. He’s a big guy, without an extra ounce of fat anywhere on his body. Gunnar is built in a way that lets me know he works hard for a living, with muscles covering him from head to toe. I can imagine what the muscular arms would feel like wrapped around me.
His hair is a mixture of different shades of brown, from gold to dark mahogany. Looking closely, there even appears to be a few strands of coppery red thrown into the mix. It’s trimmed close on the sides, with the top a little longer, causing his bangs to fall into his eyes. He has a neatly trimmed beard lining his chin, making it appear to be chiseled from stone.
His eyes, though, are what drew my attention, caught it, and kept it. I had to make myself look away. They are blue, like his brothers’, but they are darker, nearly a midnight blue. Staring into them made me think of a stormy night. I know I could get lost in them if I’m not careful, so careful is what I am going to be. I cannot take the chance of getting hurt again.
Just as I pull out of the driveway, I hear the sound of another vehicle starting up. Looking into my rearview mirror, I see a bright red 4x4 following closely behind me. No doubt, it is Gunnar coming to rake me over the coals for leaving. Damn, I should have known he would follow me.
As I pull onto the highway, my foot pushes down on the accelerator, hoping he will give up his pursuit. He follows suit, staying right on my tail. I go faster, lifting a middle finger up in hopes he will see it. He isn’t getting the hint, or maybe he is and just doesn’t care. Right as I’m about to scream in frustration, my phone rings. There is no doubt in my mind, Gunnar is calling to bitch at me for leaving without telling him.
Pulling it out of my purse, I lay it on the console, click speaker, and try to contain the growl of frustration building up inside of me. “How in the hell did you get my number?”
“Willow, baby, it’s so good to hear your voice,” a husky voice says, sending a wave of nausea through my body.
“Mr. White,” I grumble, realizing I would much rather be talking to Gunnar than the man on the other end of the phone. “What do you want?”
Deacon White was once my professor and is older than me by nearly twenty years. I didn’t care about either of those things when I crawled into his bed and fell head over heels in love with him. Our ages didn’t matter in the least. To me, he was young and handsome, the perfect man in every way. Being with him made me feel more alive than I had ever felt in my life. Even when he made me promise not to tell anyone about us, claiming that he would lose his job, I was still ecstatic to know a man as amazing as him loved me. I was deliriously happy for nearly a whole year. It bothered me not being able to tell Hadley and Tanya, but I thought it was worth it, just to have him as mine.
The only problem was that he wasn’t mine, not in any way that mattered. In fact, he had a wife and two children that I only found out about after a pregnancy scare during the spring semester. How in the hell he hid them from me for so long, I’ll never know. I’m sure part of it can be blamed on my complete devotion to him. I was blind and dumb when it came to the man I thought was my true love.
When I told him about the baby, he finally told me the truth about what I was to him: a distraction, just something on the side, nothing more. He made sure I knew he wanted nothing to do with me or the baby. He even went so far as to have me moved to another class and spent the next few months pretending I didn’t exist.
Luckily, it was a false alarm, and I wasn’t left carrying the asshole’s child. Still, I will never forget the feeling of being discarded by the man I thought loved me. It’s something I never want to feel again. I will do whatever it takes to make sure that never happens, even if it means being alone for the rest of my life.
“Deacon, you call me Deacon,” he states, sounding more than a little pissed off. “I hate when you call me Mr. White.”
For nearly three months, I didn’t call him anything. In fact, I only saw him twice in passing in the hallway. We both did our best to stay away from each other. That all changed two weeks ago, when we bumped into each other at a pub that is frequented by both students and staff. Believe it or not, the man had the audacity to walk up and snatch the beer from my hand, saying a pregnant woman should not be drinking alcohol. As soon as I enlightened him to the fact that it had just been a false alarm, he started a campaign to get back in my pants.
Grinding my teeth, I attempt to keep my attention on the road and away from thoughts of the past. “I quit calling you Deacon the day you told me I was nothing more than someone to warm your bed, while your wife was recovering from giving birth to your child.”
There is a moment of silence before he replies. “I didn’t mean any of the things I said. I told you all that was just a mistake.”
Yeah, it was a mistake that he was afraid his wife would find out about. “Sure, it was. Our whole relationship was a mistake.”
“We need to talk, Willow,” he growls out, not liking the direction our conversation is heading.
Rolling my eyes, I lose my patience. “I have already told you, more times than I can count, there is nothing for us to talk about.”
“I made a mistake,” he says, lowering his voice in a way that used to turn me to mush. “I was afraid, afraid of losing my family. Now, I realize you are the only family I need. I’m divorcing my wife. We’ll share custody of the kids, but that will be all.”
A snort works its way out of me, turning into a peal of laughter. “Do you really think I would want you now? Not to mention the fact you walked out on me when I needed you the most, but do you think I would want a man that would betray his wife in such a way?”
He says something, but the sound of a horn honking draws my attention away from the conversation. I peek into the rearview mirror again and see Gunnar still on my tail, motioning for me to pull over. He isn’t giving up, and there is no way I can let him follow me home. Dad would freak the hell out if I pulled in with one of the Brady boys trailing behind me. He may like them, but he doesn’t think they are good enough for his girls. In fact, he doesn’t think anyone is.
Deacon’s voice breaks into my thoughts, but I cut him off. “I’ve gotta go.”
With that, I click the phone off and look into my mirror once again. Knowing I have no other option, I give up, slow the car down, and pull into the next dirt road I come across. Coming to a stop in front of an old barn, I sling my car door open and step out into the chilly air. My hands go to my hips, and I glare at Gunnar’s truck as it comes to a stop behind my car. This is going to end here and now.
“My God. What is wrong with you?” I shout as soon as he steps out of his truck. “What the hell do you want?”
“You,” he answers, walking my way, not even bothering to shut his door. “And I always get what I want.”
For some reason, his words send a wave of excitement through my body. Even though I know this can lead to nothing but heartache, a part of me wants it. A huge part of me wants to feel alive again, to forget everything that Deacon did to me. A larger part, though, wants nothing more than to shield myself from the inevitable pain I know this will cause.
“Maybe that’s the way it usually goes for you, but not this time,” I tell him, even though I can feel my nipples tighten in anticipation. “I told you already, I’m not into one night stands. I don’t do that sort of thing. If you want a piece of ass, I’m sure there are a few girls back at Major’s party who would gladly give it up to a Brady brother.”
“I don’t want anyone but you,” he says, coming to a stop in front of me. “And I told you, this isn’t gonna be a one night stand. I don’t just want a piece of ass. I want you.”
His words cause my clit to pulse, sending a wave of pleasure through my body. I have to close my eyes and draw in a deep breath to keep myself from pulling him to me and dragging his lips to mine. I can’t do that, though. I can’t take the chance of getting hurt again. I’m not sure why, but as much as Deacon hurt me, I think Gunnar could hurt me even worse.
“No, no, no,” I say, more to myself than him. “I can’t do this.”
“Oh, yeah, you can,” Gunnar mumbles, causing me to open my eyes. “And you’re gonna have a hell of a lot of fun doing it.”
He is standing right in front of me, staring down at me with lust in his eyes. He doesn’t give me a chance to say anything more, just wraps his arms around me and lowers his head to mine. As soon as his lips touch mine, I know I’m in deep shit. His kiss, mixed with the feel of his hands on my body, is unlike anything I have ever felt before.
I know I shouldn’t be kissing him back, but I can’t help myself. His hands work their way up under the hem of my shirt and lightly caress my bare back. The thought of those warm hands touching me in other places causes my body to press closer to him. My hands have a mind of their own, one of them reaching up to run through his hair. The other grasps his shoulder, making sure he doesn’t pull away. Our kiss continues, becoming more heated with each second that passes.
My body comes alive, as if all my nerve endings are awaking at once. I want this. I want this more than anything I’ve ever wanted in my life. Still, the thought of Gunnar discarding me after he is done sends a cold chill throughout my body.
I finally pull away from him, trying to catch my breath. “What are we doing?”
The insane question is out before I can stop it. I know what we are doing; we’re damn near undressing each other standing out here in the open for all to see. We are going to have sex and that’s all. I just have to remember that sex is all it is. There are no emotions involved, especially not that painful thing called love.
“Anything we want,” he tells me, brushing his lips softly against mine. “And we’re going to do it over and over all night long.”
Looking into his eyes, I make a decision, one that could lead to heartbreak but will also lead to the pleasure I need. “Once, one night, and that’s it. After that, you leave me alone.”
“If that’s what you want.” His large hand comes up to cup my cheek as he stares into my eyes. “But when this is over, you’ll be begging for me to do it again and again.”