Chapter Five
Willow
Looking around Hadley and Tucker’s living room, a smile crosses my face. Our friend, Kelby, came down from Lexington to visit us. He was best friends to all three of us while Tanya and Hadley were still attending the University of Kentucky. This year, with both of them here in White Chapel, he has become my only friend.
He became my rock after everything that happened with Deacon. Even though he didn’t know what was wrong, he knew something wasn’t right. He stuck to me like glue. We even shared an apartment this semester. If Hadley wasn’t about to pop, and I hadn’t promised her I would be here to help with the baby, I would be living with him next semester, too.
“You look even prettier,” Kelby says, laying a hand on Hadley’s rounded belly. “I never thought you would look good fat.”
Tanya’s hand flies out, hitting him in the back of the head. “She’s not fat, dude. She’s pregnant. There’s a big freaking difference.”
“I may be pregnant, but he’s right. I’m fat as a cow. I can’t even see my own feet these days,” Hadley says with a smile.
I laugh at their easy banter, remembering all the days and nights we spent together last year at school. I miss those days, but they’re long gone. I hate to admit it, but I’m jealous Hadley and Tanya got their happily ever after, while all I have are bad memories of an asshole who was never good enough for me in the first place.
Oh well, it’s over and done with now. Time to quit dwelling on it. “How long are you gonna get to stay, Kelby?”
“I’m not sure. I haven’t made any definite plans, not until Christmas break is over, anyways. Of course, after that, I’ll be going back to school,” he explains with a shrug. “I may just stay until school starts back up.”
“You’ll have to come back after the baby is born,” Hadley says, shooting a smile his way. “You know, you will be an honorary uncle.”
They go back and forth for a minute, deciding what the baby will call him. Hadley wants him to be plain old Uncle Kelby, but that’s not good enough for him. He wants to be known as Uncle Supreme, the favorite uncle of all time.
Laughing at him, an idea pops into my head. “You could always just transfer to Western with the rest of us, then you wouldn’t be so far away.”
Kelby leans back on the couch and looks at me in way that lets me know he is seeing down deep into my soul. He knows I’m lonely without me even saying a word. I don’t have to; he can just read it.
He places his arm around my shoulders and pulls me to him. “Lexington is not very far, and you already know I can’t switch schools. My scholarship is for UK. Even if it wasn’t, Noah is there. Anywhere he is, is where I’m gonna be.”
I knew he would say that, and I don’t blame him. If I had a man like Noah, I wouldn’t want to leave him, either. I lean my head on his shoulder, thinking about how great of a guy Kelby is. He has always been such a good friend, always there when we needed him. As much as I will miss him, I know he is right.
“Yeah, I know, but just think of how great it would be,” I say with a smile, letting him know I’m just teasing. “It would be like old times again, with all four of us together. Think about the trouble we could cause.”
Kelby chuckles and says, “We did have some great times, didn’t we? I’m always telling people embarrassing stories about y’all.”
Reaching up, I lightly slap him on the chest. “You better not be. I’ll kick your ass.”
My phone rings, bringing an end to our conversation. I reach into my purse and drag it out, scowling at the name on the screen. This is the fifth time today Deacon has called me. I haven’t answered, but I did listen to his voice mails. All were filled with him begging me to give him another chance, each one more pathetic than the last.
After sticking my phone back in my purse, I look up to my friends and see them all staring at me. “What?”
“Who keeps calling you and leaving you with that pissed off look on your face?” Tanya asks, looking worried. “It isn’t Gunnar, is it?”
I almost tell her yes, to drag out her guilt for giving him my number, but I don’t. Instead, I just shrug and play it off as nothing. Of course, my friends are not going to let that fly. Each one goes after me, wanting to know what is going on.
“Do you remember Professor White? He taught English Lit. our second semester,” I ask, knowing damn good and well they do.
Every girl on campus knew Deacon. He was that teacher, the one everyone dreamed about. He isn’t sexy in the way that Gunnar is, but he is handsome. He’s beautiful in a way that makes women swoon. He looks a lot like Patrick Dempsey, curly hair and all. The few streaks of silver in it only add to his beauty.
“You didn’t,” Hadley says, leaning back in her chair and putting a hand on her overly round belly. “With our teacher?”
“I’d do him. Hell, I’d do the man every day then twice on Sunday, if he’d let me,” Kelby states, followed quickly by Tanya’s agreement.
“Oh, yeah. Me too. Well, if I didn’t have Major, that is.”
Taking in a deep breath, I tell them about everything: our relationship, his secret family, and even the pregnancy scare. Finally, I tell them about how he treated me and how it made me feel. By the time I’m done, I’m in tears.
Running my hands over my eyes, I shake my head. “How could I have been so stupid, so damn blind to what he really was?”
“Oh, sweetie,” Kelby murmurs, pulling me further into his hold. “Love can make us mere mortals do stupid things.”
“I take my words back. I wouldn’t do him,” Tanya says, breaking the tension.
Just like that, the moment is done. We all start laughing, just like we always do. I’m so focused on being with my friends, I don’t even hear the front door open, but I sure see when Gunnar storms into the room. He heads straight for us, with a look of fury on his face.
“Get your damn hands off my woman,” he says to Kelby, reaching down to pull me into his arms. “I don’t want to ever see you touch her again.”
I don’t even have a chance to say a word before I’m tossed over his shoulder and whisked out of the room. I try to fight his hold, but he’s got his arms locked tightly around me. Without a word, he pulls me through the foyer and straight to the front door.
Just as Gunnar is pulling me outside, I hear Kelby say, “Now, that’s a boy I would do. I may even let him have it three times on Sunday.”
I bang my fists against his back and shout, “What the hell is wrong with you? Put me down and let me go, right now.”
He doesn’t let go, just keeps walking out the door. When we get to the porch, he slams the door behind us and puts me on my feet. His eyes are focused on me, full of anger and something else that I suspect is hurt. Why? I have no idea.
“I will be damned if some other man is going to have his hands on you. You’re mine. You just haven’t realized it yet,” he states, folding his arms across his massive chest. “Nobody, I don’t give a shit who they are, is gonna take you away from me.”
Surprised to realize he is jealous, I forget all about the fact he just tossed me over his shoulder and forced me to come with him. “Gunnar, it’s not what you think.”
He doesn’t reply, just stares at me with those deep blue eyes. There’s something in them, something different than before. If I’m not mistaken, I think it’s fear. Can he really be scared of me being with another guy?
“Kelby is just a friend. After Tanya and Hadley left, he was the only friend I had. You don’t have to worry about him because he has a boyfriend of his own,” I say, not bothering to mention that what I do is my business.
I see the look of shock cross his face, followed quickly by a look of relief. His body also loses some of the tension he had just a minute ago, as if the weight of the world has been lifted from his shoulders.
“Fuck, Willow. I’m sorry. That shouldn’t have happened.” His hand goes to his hair, messing with the bit on top. “I don’t know what happened back there. I just saw his arm around you, and with the way you’ve been ignoring me, it’s making me fucking crazy.”
As I stare into his eyes, I know I have to put a stop to this, this push and pull we have going on. He wants more than I am willing to give. Even I want more than I am willing to give. Who could have thought that we could become so attached after only knowing each other such a short time? I have to put a stop to it before someone gets hurt.
“You are right. I have been avoiding you, but I have a good reason. You just have to trust me about that and leave me alone,” I tell him, hoping he will take my words to heart. “This is just not going to work between us.”
I try to turn and walk back in the house, but Gunnar just pulls me back to him. As I look in his beautiful blue eyes, I can’t help it as a tear slips down my cheek. He wipes it away with his thumb then leans down and places a kiss on my cheek.
“Please, don’t cry. I don’t know what happened, and I won’t if you don’t tell me. But, I promise you, no matter what it is, we can figure it out together,” he whispers, resting his chin on the top of my head.
I give my head a little shake before saying, “It’s not that simple. I can’t handle having my heart broken again when you realize that I’m not the one you want.”
With his arms wrapped around me, he leads me down the steps. “Did someone break your heart?”
For some reason, it all comes bubbling out. After keeping it a secret for so long, in one day I have told four people. Three of them were my best friends, and it felt good to share it with them. Sharing it with Gunnar feels even better.
“He was a fucking idiot,” he says, coming to a stop beside his truck. “I know you think you’re stupid, but think about the poor woman he is married to. That chick has got to live with his ass.”
His words cause a laugh to slip past my lips. He’s right; I got off easy. She’s got to put up with him for the rest of her life, or at least until she gets smart enough to kick him to the curb. I face plant in his chest, letting the laughter out. He just holds me, obviously realizing I need this moment.
When I step back, Gunnar reaches out and opens the door of his truck. “I’m asking you to trust me, to give me a chance to prove there is something here. A chance to show you that what I feel is real.”
“I don’t know if I can,” I say, wishing I was braver.
He leans down and brushes his lips over mine. “At least, give us a chance to see what can happen between us before tossing me aside. “
I want to. I want it more than anything I’ve ever wanted before, but I’m scared. I’m so scared that this man is going to take my heart, and it’ll never be the same again. Looking into his eyes, I just can’t say no. Not saying anything, I climb into his truck and shut the door. He stares at me through the glass, a smile on his face. I just hope I’m not making the biggest mistake of my life.