Present day ...

“Damien?”

I had just left the bathroom as my wife called my name.

“Yeah, babe?”

“C’mere,” she shouted from the kitchen. “You can deal with this disrespectful little shitehead.”

Uh-oh.

I jogged down the stairs, down the hallway, and into the kitchen where my second eldest son, Kailen, was leaning against the counter, looking down at his feet. Alannah stood in front of him with her hands on her hips, tapping her foot on the ground. This was becoming a regular occurrence. Kailen was twelve, but his attitude was getting out of hand. He talked back, didn’t do what he was told, and I knew Alannah worried herself sick over him.

“What’s wrong?”

Alannah didn’t look away from our son. “D’you want to tell ‘im or should I?”

Kailen peeked up at his mom, then looked at me and dropped his head instantly.

“Fine,” my wife clipped and turned to face me. “He didn’t help me with dinner when I asked ‘im to because he was too busy playin’ on his phone. I took it off ‘im and told ‘im to help me, and he told me to piss off and do it meself.”

My eyes widened as I moved around my wife. Kailen tensed as I reached for him and fisted the fabric at the collar of his sweater. I hauled him out of the room, down the hallway, and into the living room. He didn’t say a word, and he didn’t struggle. He just walked with me and clasped his hands together and rested them on his knees when I sat him down on the couch across from me.

“Wait,” he yelped when he saw me reach for the belt on my jeans. “Please, I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?” I repeated. “You’re suddenly sorry because you don’t wanna get belted?”

Kailen swallowed. “I didn’t mean to snap at ‘er. I was arguin’ with someone, and she spoke to me at the wrong time, and I took my anger out on ‘er. I saw the look on ‘er face when I said what I did, and I feel like shite, Da. I’m sorry.”

I set my jaw. “I don’t stand for anyone disrespecting my wife. Just because you’re my child doesn’t mean you get a pass. Get your ass up.”

Kailen hesitated but got to his feet and turned away from me before I had to ask him to. He hadn’t needed to be whooped in months, but he still knew the drill. He pushed his sweatpants down to his thighs revealing his boxers and balled his hands into fists as he waited. I removed my belt and wasted no time in punishing him. I swatted his backside five times, then told him to pull his pants up and sit back down. He did so as I replaced my belt, and I didn’t miss the tension on his face as he slowly sat down. I knew he ass was on fire, and I wanted him to remember that was what happened when he disrespected his parents.

“Now,” I said, sitting down across from him, “who were you arguing with?”

Kailen didn’t answer me.

“I can go and get your phone—”

“It’s no one ye’ know,” he interrupted. “He’s just a ... friend.”

I raised a brow. “I know all your friends.”

“Not this one.”

I waited for him to continue.

“Da, I don’t wanna talk to ye’ about ‘im.”

That hurt my feelings a little bit because this was the first time he had ever said that to me. Usually, Kailen could talk to me about anything, so this made me think something was really wrong for him to keep it from me.

“Why not?”

“Because I just don’t.”

I grunted. “Kailen, what aren’t you telling me? You haven’t been yourself these past few months, you act out, and you constantly have an attitude. What the hell is going on to make you so angry all the time? I can’t help you if I don’t know what’s wrong, son.”

My child locked his grey eyes on mine, and seconds of silence ticked by, then out of nowhere, he began to cry.

“Kailen?” I frowned. “Did I hit you too hard?”

I instantly felt sick. I had meant to punish him for being disrespectful to his mother, but I didn’t mean to cause him actual pain.

“No,” Kailen choked, frantically wiping at his eyes. “It’s not that.”

I got to my feet and sat next to him, putting my arm around his shoulder.

“Kai, what’s wrong?”

He turned his body to mine and wrapped his arms around me, placing his face against my neck and sobbed. My heart began to beat fast, and adrenaline flowed through my veins. I was sick with worry now, and I had no idea what to do other than comfort my child.

“It’s okay,” I told him. “Whatever is it that has you this upset, it’s going to be okay. I promise.”

Kailen cried harder and squeezed me tight. I said nothing further; I just held him and waited for him to calm down enough to speak. This took at least five minutes.

“I’m scared to tell ye’.”

I leaned back from him and used my thumbs to wipe away tears from his face. He looked so much like my brother Dominic that it freaked me out. I knew that meant he looked like me, but when I looked at Kailen, he reminded so much of my brother ... just with my white hair.

“Don’t be scared,” I told him. “Don’t ever be scared to tell me anything, okay?”

Kailen sniffled and he nodded. “It’s ... it’s about a relationship I’m in.”

That was news to me. He was only twelve.

“You’re in a relationship?”

He nodded. “Yeah, I am.”

“Okay,” I said slowly. “Who with? Do I know her?”

Kailen looked down at his intertwined hands. I wondered why he didn’t answer me, then it struck me that maybe I didn’t ask the right question. I asked if I knew the girl he was dating. I assumed he was in a relationship with a girl when I shouldn’t have.

“Or him?” I added. “Do I know him?”

My son jerked his eyes up to mine, and he looked so scared that I wanted to break down and cry myself.

“Kailen, are you gay?”

He shook his head rapidly from side to side.

“Hey, hey, you do not need to be scared,” I assured him. “Your sexuality will never change how much me and your mom love you, okay? You’re still Kailen, still my pain in ass son who I love more than life itself. You’re perfect the way you are.”

Kailen cried again and threw his body at me once more, and I blew out a breath, fighting off tears of my own because I knew I’d be no good to anyone if I broke down. I’d have to call in Alannah if that happened because once I cried, I was a goner.

“D’ye not think I’m straight?”

I looked down at Kailen whose face was still against my chest.

“I’ve never thought about it, to be honest,” I admitted.

My son was silent for a moment, then he said, “Well ... I’m not.”

“Not straight?” I questioned.

He nodded. Once.

“That’s—”

“I’m not gay either,” he interrupted.

He leaned back from me, wiping his face once more. He was shaking, so I reached for his hand and held it in my own. This conversation was huge for him, and he had obviously kept this bottled up inside for a long time, and it made me ill to think that he worried over telling me. That he was probably scared he would be rejected.

I tilted my head. “Are you bisexual or pansexual? Or gender queer? I’m afraid I’m wildly ignorant to what some of those mean, and I know there are a lot of other sexualities, but I will learn them all if—”

“Da,” Kailen cut me off, and he huffed a little laugh. “Ye’ don’t need to learn what they all mean.”

“But I want to,” I said. “If you identify as one, I want to know everything about it so I can connect with you better.”

Kailen squeezed my hand. “Ye’ already know every about me sexuality.”

“I do?”

He nodded. “I’m bi ... like Uncle Alec.”

“Right,” I said with a nod of my head. “You’re getting the same chat that Leland got. Don’t fuck around with a girl’s, or a boy’s, heart or me and you are gonna have problems. Understand?”

Kailen had a ghost of a smile on his face as he bobbed his head.

“Am I the first person you’ve told?” I asked.

He shook his head. “Uncle Alec knows. I told him a few months ago ago, and he has been encouraging me to tell ye’, but he said he would respect me decision to tell ye’ when I was ready.”

That was fair. I didn’t know what it was like to be anything other than straight, so it made sense for Kailen to confide in someone he could relate to.

“How long have you known you were bi?” I asked. “I honestly didn’t think you would be interested in girls, or boys, yet.”

His face flushed red. “Last year, I saw a girl who I thought was pretty, and I wanted to kiss her like you do with Ma ... then a few days later, I saw a cute lad and thought that same thing about him. I didn’t know right away, but when I started to like girls, I liked boys in the same way too.”

“I’m sorry you felt like you couldn’t talk to me or your mom.”

“I wanted to,” Kailen said, “but I kept backin’ out of it.”

“Why?”

“I didn’t ... I just ... I was afraid ye’ would be different with me.”

Pain thrummed in my heart.

“Son,” I said, firmly. “I love you no matter who you’re attracted to. Your sexuality doesn’t even come into play. It never has, and it never will.”

“I knew that,” Kailen stated. “I did, but there was a fear in the back of me head that ye’ wouldn’t.”

“I hate that you’ve been thinking about and worrying about this for a long time.”

“It’s cool.” He one-shoulder shrugged.

“It’s not,” I pressed. “I don’t want you being afraid to be yourself especially around me or our family.”

Kailen cringed. “I don’t want the lads to treat me differently.”

“Your brothers?”

“And me cousins,” he added. “Georgie knows, but I don’t exactly know how because I never told ‘er. She just started talkin’ to me one day about who she fancied and said if I got with ‘im, she’d kick me arse.”

I snorted. “That girl is a clever one.”

“Yeah.” He nodded in agreement.

“Is this why you’ve been so out of character the past few months?” I asked.

“I guess,” he said tentatively. “I get mad when I can’t talk about who I liked in the way Leland or me cousins do because I was worried they’ll laugh at me or not want to be close to me anymore. I think I started to pull into meself, and that’s when I started gettin’ angry with everyone. Then Rome joined me footie team, and he told me one day after we hit the showers that he fancied me and me heart nearly stopped. Apparently, he was bisexual, and everyone knew it. I started textin’ him, and then we’ve got together in secret because he knew I hadn’t told anyone that I was bi.”

“This Rome is your boyfriend?”

Kailen blushed again as he nodded.

“Are you happy that you’re dating him?”

“Yes,” he answered. “I am.”

“Then I’m happy that you are happy, but you’re only twelve, and that’s extremely young to be in a relationship. I’m warning you that you’re not to enter into anything physical until you’re old enough. You may not have to worry about pregnancy when dating Rome, but there are other things that can give you a surprise.”

Kailen’s face was crimson red. “We’ve just kissed a few times, and that’s it. I swear.”

“Good.” I nodded. “I want to meet him.”

My son’s eyes widened. “Jesus, why?”

“Because you’re my son, and I want to make sure this dude you’re dating is good enough for you. Have you got a problem with that?”

He ducked his head and smiled. “No, I don’t.”

“Good.”

Kailen exhaled a deep breath, and said, “Da, I feel so ... light after tellin’ ye’ this. I love ye’ so much for still lovin’ me even though I’m different.”

“Different?” I repeated. “Everyone likes their cup of tea their own unique way, so in that sense, we are all different.”

“Ye’ sounded exactly like Auntie Branna just then.”

I laughed. “Don’t tell your uncle Ryder. He’ll rag on my ass if he knows.”

Kailen grinned and shook his head.

“Is Rome the only boy, you know, you’ve kissed?”

“The only person,” Kailen corrected. “I’ve never kissed anyone else.”

“Why not?” I asked, feeling offended on his behalf. “You’re a handsome kid. You look like me and have your mama’s smile. Girls and guys would be crazy not to crush on you.”

Kailen sunk lower in the chair as he groaned.

“Please, stop,” he said. “This is mortifying.”

I laughed. “My bad.”

Kailen snickered. “Will ye’ come into the kitchen so I can tell Ma? I’d rather ye’ were with me.”

“I heard everythin’!” Alannah suddenly barrelled into the sitting room, taking us both by surprise as she dived over my body and landed onto top of our child. I shook my head and smiled when she started crying, and Kailen looked over her shoulder at me in a panic. He hugged her and comforted her, but she was a complete mess by the time she got to her feet.

“Me precious boy,” she cried and kissed Kailen’s face. “You’re so perfect, and so handsome, and you’re gonna be the best boyfriend that Rome or anyone could ever ask for. I love ye’ so much.”

I laughed at Kailen’s deer in the headlights expression. He looked at me and playfully glared as Alannah tackled him with another hug. She didn’t let him go for a long time, and when they finally did separate, he tugged her into the kitchen so he could help her with the dinner as he was originally asked to do. I followed them and silently watched them interact. The difference with Kailen was incredible; it was like I could see a weight had been lifted off his shoulders now that he’d revealed his secret to us.

I was proud of him, so damn proud. I walked out into the hallway when one of my other sons ran down the stairs.

“Leland.” I sighed when he jumped the last three steps and landed on the floor with a thud. “You’re going to break your damn neck. Walk down the stairs like a regular person.”

“Da,” he beamed, turning to face me. “Just the man I wanted to see.”

The boy was thirteen, but he acted sixty.

“What’s up?”

“I’ve a question.”

“Shoot.”

“Have ye’ ever seen a girl so beautiful that she made your heart stop beatin’ in your chest with one glance at ‘er face?”

I looked at my eldest son and wondered what girl turned my child into a poet.

“Yeah, Leland,” I said. “I have, and she is your mom.”

“This girl is like Ma.” He smiled. “I’m gonna marry ‘er.”

“Hold your horses.” I chuckled. “You’re only thirteen.”

Leland flicked his grey eyes to mine, and said, “I’ll marry ‘er when I’m eighteen then. I’m not being stupid and marryin’ her after spendin’ loads of years in love with her like you did with Ma.”

My lips parted. “Things were complicated with me and your mom. It wasn’t that easy.”

“Love is always easy, Da. Once ye’ find the right girl, it’ll figure itself out.”

I watched him walk into the living room, and as I stared after him, I pondered if he was really my son or Alec’s.

“Who is this girl that has you madly in love with one glance?”

Leland fell into the couch, and said, “I’ve no idea, but I still love her.”

God, give me patience.

“Start from the beginning.”

“I saw ‘er on the sidelines durin’ me match today.” Leland sighed. “She’s one of me mate’s cousins, I know that much, but they left before I could ask ‘im what ‘er name was. She’s from Japan, and holy crap, she’s beautiful. She has hair as dark as night, skin like caramel, and she’s itty bitty. I’m gonna marry her, I know it.”

“You’re spending too much time around your uncle Alec.”

“Da,” Leland groaned as he rolled off the couch and onto the floor. “I’m in love, and I don’t even know ‘er name.”

I smiled, shook my head, and said, “Text your friend and ask him her name.”

“I already did that,” he grunted. “Akio says he won’t tell me because I’m not sniffin’ around his cousin. He said she doesn’t speak English very good either. He’s standin’ between me and the girl I’m goin’ to marry, the shitehead.”

I laughed. “Love always finds a way, don’t worry.”

“I guess,” he said just as Alannah hollered, “Dinner’s done.”

“Thank God,” Leland said as he got to his feet. “Bein’ in love makes me hungry.”

I playfully swiped at him as he ducked out of the room. My remaining three sons, Noble who was ten, Soren who was eight, and Heath who was six, all descended the stairs, talking at once. They walked by me without a word, but when they entered the kitchen, each of them hugged and kissed their mom. I glared after the little turds before I followed them and joined them all at the table as my wife, and Kailen, served us dinner. Once everyone was seated and eating away, conversation about the soccer games earlier in the day became the main topic of discussion.

“I have somethin’ I wanna say,” Kailen said during a moment of silence.

Noble looked at Kailen, and said, “So say it.”

“I will, but before I do, I want ye’s to promise me ye’s won’t think differently of me.”

I felt nervous on my son’s behalf but so proud of him for deciding to tell his brothers about his sexuality.

“I’d never think different of ye’,” Soren said. “So shoot.”

The rest of the boys nodded in agreement, so after Kailen looked at me and his mom for support, he took a breath and said, “I’m bisexual, and I have a boyfriend. Ye’ might know ‘im. It’s Rome Forrest.”

Leland, who was next to me, began to choke on his chicken, so I smacked his back out of instinct.

“You’re gay?” Leland eventually asked, his breathing laboured.

Kailen stared at not only his brother but his best friend.

“No,” he said, calmly before he repeated, “I’m bisexual.”

Leland stared at Kailen, and Kailen stared right back at him. I didn’t realise I was holding my breath until my chest began to burn with pain. I prayed my son didn’t say something homophobic because I knew it’d devastate Kailen. They were the closest of my boys, and they were always together.

“I’m not hungry anymore,” Leland suddenly said and got to his feet.

Tears filled Alannah’s eyes instantly.

“Leland!” Kailen shouted, jumped to his feet and stopped Leland from leaving the room. “Don’t be like this, man. Please.”

“Be like what?”

“Don’t be weird about this,” Kailen pleaded, his hands shaking. “You’re me best friend, me brother, and I don’t want ye’ to ... to hate me.”

“I don’t bloody hate ye’,” Leland stated. “I’m pissed at ye’.”

“Why?”

“Ye’ know I hate Rome Forrest. He is an arsehole who never passes the bloody ball durin’ our matches, and he always talks shite, now I’m supposed to be chilled with ye’ just announcin’ at the dinner table that you’re goin’ out with ‘im? No, ye’ can piss off, Kailen.”

Things were silence for a few seconds, then Kailen’s laughter rang loud and clear.

“What the hell are you laughin’ at?” Leland demanded, shoving his brother. “This isn’t funny.”

“You’re mad at me about Rome, not about me bein’ bi?”

“Are ye’ thick?” Leland asked, baffled. “Obviously, it’s over Rome. Why would I be mad at ye’ over ye’ likin’ lad?”

Alannah laughed as the tears left her eyes, I practically deflated against my chair, and Kailen wrapped his arms around his brother and hugged him tightly.

“I’m was shittin’ it to tell ye’. I thought ye’ might—”

“Want nothin’ to do with ye’?” Leland finished, returning his brother’s hug.

Kailen nodded and cleared his throat when he and his brother separated.

“Rome’s chill, Leland.”

“No, he’s not, and I’m not bein’ nice to ‘im,” Leland stated. “I don’t care if ye’ marry the fella. I’m not bein’ nice to ‘im. Not now, not ever.”

“You’ll come to the weddin’ though?” Kailen asked, smiling. “If we get married, that is.”

“Obviously,” Leland said with a roll of his eyes. “But I’m not bein’ nice to ‘im, no matter what, so you’re just goin’ to have to get over that ‘ere and now. Accept it, because I have.”

Kailen laughed, shoved his brother, then returned to the table. Leland followed him and returned his seat. Alannah was wiping her eyes, and I was grinning like a freak.

“This is so weird,” Soren said, his brows furrowed. “Why would you like boys? Girls are really pretty. Look at our ma and Georgie.”

Kailen looked at his brother, and said, “I can’t help it. I just happen to like both boys and girls.”

Soren looked around the table, then to his mom, he said, “Do I hafta like boys? ‘Cause I don’t wanna.”

His mother laughed. “It’s not a choice, baby. Ye’ like who ye’ like ... ye’ just aren’t allowed to be mean to someone for who they like, okay?”

“Okay.” Soren nodded and went back to eating his dinner.

Heath looked at Kailen, and said, “I like dogs. Does that mean I have to marry one, Kai? ‘Cause that’d be cool.”

A moment of silence passed before we all burst into laughter. Heath frowned as he looked at us; he was clearly dead serious about his question, and that made it funnier. He rolled his eyes and returned to eating his dinner, ignoring all of us. After we settled down, some of the kids asked Kailen questions about him being bisexual, then it was just accepted, and everyone moved on from it. From the look on Kailen’s face, I knew he was happy.

He was being himself and that made me happy.

“Da,” Noble said as I pushed my plate away and rubbed my stomach.

“What?”

“When are ye’ gonna shave your beard?”

All of my sons looked at me. Alannah ducked her head, but I caught her grin. I reached up at touch the beard I had been growing out over the past few months and frowned. “I wasn’t planning on shaving it.”

“Ye’ should,” Noble said. “It looks stupid.”

“Hey.” I frowned. “Don’t hate on me beard, ye’ little turd.”

My son snorted. “It was either slag ye’ your beard or your gut.”

I growled. “So I don’t have a six-pack anymore, sue me.”

“Uncle Nico still has his six-pack.”

“Noble,” I growled. “You’re on thin ice, princess.”

He hated being called princess.

“Don’t hate on me just because you’ll be fat in a few years and look like Santa Claus!”

I sucked in a sharp breath. “You take that back, you little shit.”

My son got to his feet and stomped out of the kitchen.

“Santa Claus wishes he was as ripped as me!”

I didn’t have a six-pack anymore, but I was still pretty damn toned.

“You’re fooling no one with that beard, Da,” he hollered back. “You’re gonna look like Father Christmas when it gets really thick, and Uncle Alec will never let ye’ live it down.”

I paused and realised my son was right. Once my older brother realised this, he would compare me to Santa Claus because my hair was white ... and that would fucking kill me.

“Clippers,” I grunted as I got to my feet. “I need my clippers.”

Everyone laughed as I left the room and headed up to my bedroom. I entered mine and Alannah’s bathroom, picked up my clippers, and stared in the mirror.

“Can I shave it for ye’?”

I glanced at Noble as he leaned against the doorway. “Does it look that bad?”

“Nah,” he answered. “I’m just teasin’, but I know what Uncle Alec is like, and he’ll slag ye’ for sure.”

He was right. I lifted him onto the counter, handed him the clippers, instructed him on what to do, then held perfectly still as he shaved my beard. When he was finished ten minutes later, he looked proud of himself. He leaned in and kissed my cheek, which was so cute I forgot about him being a turd.

“Want to watch how I shave with a razor to get the rest of it off?”

Noble nodded and spent the next few minutes watching me shave. He was interested in the whole process, so I talked him through it all. It dawned on me that it would only be a few more years until I would be showing Leland how to shave, then Kailen, then Noble then my other sons. Time was flying by, and there was nothing I could do about it.

“There.” Noble smiled when I used a towel to dry my face off. “Ye’ look like me da again.”

I chuckled as he jumped of the counter and ran out of the room. I looked in the mirror, then left the room, walked over to my bed, and fell on top of it.

“Nice arse.”

I grinned into my pillow. “Where are the boys?”

“Leland is in charge of cleanup tonight, so he has recruited all of them to help.”

I rolled onto my back, and said, “Get your fine ass over here then.”

Alannah approached me, and said, “I think I’ll miss the beard, but Noble was right. Alec would end ye’ with jokes over it.”

“I know.” I sighed. “He’s a dick.”

My wife laughed as she climbed on top of me. She leaned down and brushed her lips over my freshly shaved skin. I slid my hands around to her ass and squeezed. She moved her lips to mine and smiled.

“Do we have sex or take a nap?”

I looked up at her, and said, “We had sex this morning, so I vote for a nap.”

Alannah laughed and rolled on her side next to me. She cuddled against me, and said, “I’m so proud of Kailen.”

“Me too,” I said, hooking my arm around her body. “I had no idea that he was dealing with it, though. Did you have any idea?”

“None,” Alannah answered. “I’m so glad we all know, and everyone is happy for him because it breaks me heart thinkin’ how scared he was that maybe we wouldn’t accept ‘im.”

I kissed the crown of her head. “Me too, but he’s happy now. Did you see his smile?”

“Yeah.” She relaxed. “He doesn’t have to hide anymore.”

I sighed, feeling content. “I love you, freckles.”

“I love ye’ too, Jack Frost.”

I smiled. “Can you believe it’s been twenty years since I first met you?”

“No, because it feels just like yesterday. Now we’re married and have five handsome young men. I love our life.”

“Me too, freckles. Me too.”

I closed my eyes and relaxed. I loved my wife and my kids more than life itself, but I would be lying if I said they didn’t wear me out. It was worth it, though. They were worth it. I counted my lucky stars every single night when I slid into bed next to my wife that I led the life I did because things could have turned out very different for me had it not been for my brothers.

I owed everything to them, and I always would.