I’m going to miss this when I leave for school. That's all I can think as I lie under the comforter in Sandra’s guest room with Derek. This moment feels right, it feels safe. But it’s going to be gone before I know it.

Ever since he broke down and told me about his mom, things have been different. He's finally opening up to me instead of pushing me away. And I feel closer to him than ever before. I've fallen for him. Completely. I'm in love with Derek Wade. The thought makes me want to kiss him and run from him all at the same time. Either way, I’d be left breathless.

“What are you thinking?” he asks me.

He's running his fingers through my hair as I lie with my head on his chest. The sound of his heartbeat is steady and soothing. My fingers lazily trace circles on his bare chest. This moment is so close to being perfect.

“I'm just happy right now,” I answer as I continue to caress his chest, moving down to his stomach. Right now being the words he won’t register as important.

“Yeah? I'm feeling pretty happy right now, too. Thanks to you,” he says and kisses the top of my head.

I lick my lips and try to get rid of the sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.

“I can't believe my break is almost over. I’m not looking forward to going back next week,” I admit. I’m dreading being so far apart from Derek, especially with how sick his mom is. He pulls me closer, resting both hands on my hip. I can't believe how much has happened in the past four weeks. I don't want this to end. If only you could pause time and live in a single moment forever.

“I’m not going to like you being so far away, but it's only for a few months. And I'll definitely be coming down to see you,” he says as he runs his hand down my back. “We’ll make this work. Don't worry, sweetheart.” He kisses my hair and runs his hand up and down my arm as he says, “You know I can't stay away from you for long.”

I pick my head up off his sculpted chest to kiss him.

My body reacts the moment our lips touch. We've spent most of the day in bed, and I still want more. I’m not sure I'll ever get enough of him. Thank God Sandra and Tony are at Tony’s for the weekend.

He slowly kisses down my jaw to my neck. He's already hard again, I can feel him pressing insistently against my hip. As I go to climb on top of him, his phone rings.

A chill sweeps through my body, killing the mood. Who would be calling him so late?

He doesn’t make a move to go for it. “Do you need to get that?”

“No, it's not important,” he says as he continues kissing down my neck.

“But what if it's someone from work?” I ask as I slide off him, ignoring how his hands at my hip are trying to hold me to him.

He strokes my cheek softly. “It doesn't matter, sweetheart. When I'm with you, I'm with you. No one else matters.” He pulls me on top of him and starts kissing my collarbone, running his hand down my back to my ass.

His phone starts ringing again. The hairs on the back of my neck stand up, and I have a bad feeling about this. “Are you sure?” I ask, glancing at his phone and then back at him.

I know his mom has a different ringtone, so it’s not her. It’s not his house calling, but I don’t like it. I have a really bad fucking feeling.

“I'm positive. Come on, it's late. Let’s get some sleep,” he says and he pulls me closer to him. He covers us both with the down comforter, and wraps his arm around my waist.

I hope it isn't anything important and that it’s just my paranoia. I try focusing on his steady heartbeat and rhythmic breathing.

But a moment later it goes off again. I push off of him and give him a look.

He sighs with exasperation and crawls out of bed, walking over to the dresser to check his phone, the third call going to voicemail before he’s able to answer.

He puts his phone to his ear to listen to his voicemail. I pull my knees up to my chest as I wait for him to tell me everything is okay and that he was right. But my heart stills in my chest as his expression changes.

The blood drains from his face. It’s bad. Whatever’s happened is bad. Fuck. My heart squeezes into a painful knot.

“I have to go,” he says, pulling his jeans on and stepping into his shoes.

I’m already out of bed, grabbing a pair of yoga pants off the floor and trying to put them on quickly. “What is it, what’s wrong?”

“It’s my Ma, I have to go. I’ll call you later,” he says, turning toward the door.

Pulling a hoodie over my head and not bothering with a bra, I yell, “Derek! Wait! Is she okay? I'll come with you!”

“I’ll be fine. Just stay here. I'll call you later,” he says shortly. Goosebumps prick over every inch of my skin at his rejection. Is he really pushing me away right now? He knows I know how close he and his mom are. If she’s not okay, I want to be there.

“Let me come with you. Let me be there for you,” I beg him while grabbing a pair of socks.

“Emma, I don't fucking have time for this! Stay here. I'll talk to you later,” he yells as he storms out of the room. I can’t believe him. I know he’s hurting right now, but he can’t just push me away like this. He knows as well as I do that he needs someone. I need someone too.

He’s not emotionally stable right now; he’s not going to be able to handle this. He’s hurting, and he needs someone. Everything in me is telling me that he’s going to need me. I run after him, banging the door against the wall and chasing him down the stairs.

The front door slams before I’m able to get to him. I stare at it, my mouth open and lungs barely functioning.

After a moment, my body starts trembling. I always listen to him. I never tell him no. And that’s my fault. It’s going to ruin me. But listening to him right now is going to ruin us. I can’t let it happen. I know it with everything in me.

I head back upstairs to put my sneakers on. I'm not going to listen to him this time. Fuck that. Something’s wrong, and he needs me.

I grab my phone to text Sandra to see if she knows what's going on. Hopefully, Tony told her about whatever’s going on with his mom.

I slow my steps, my heart pausing. His mom. I shake my head, my throat closing as I think about seeing her yesterday. No, she’s going to be okay. I swallow the spiked lump that’s suffocating me and ignore it. Brushing the tears from my eyes I throw my hair up into a bun, grab my wristlet and my keys then head downstairs.

I'm checking my phone what seems like every thirty seconds. For Sandra, for Derek. I just want to know what’s going on. I stifle the emotions threatening to cripple me. I focus on my breathing and on Derek snapping at me like that.

The anger comes back and it’s easy for me to ignore the pain.

I can't believe he expects me to just sit back and let him handle this on his own. He can't just push me aside and take on something like this alone.

I climb in my car, the freezing cold sending a chill down my spine, turning my breath to fog in front of my face, and my phone dings. Sandra finally texted me back. I turn the key, bringing my car to life before checking her text.

My mouth goes dry and my heart stops when I read her message, my entire body feeling like ice; Derek’s mom died.