Werewolf Romance
By: Jennifer Mckenzie
Captivated by the Dark Pack
My dreams are simple.
It all starts with me looking at my bedroom mirror. It is oval, antique and beautiful. I stare at it as it reflects my pale freckled face and my dark curly hair. I smile at it out of habit and my dimples appear on both sides of my chubby cheeks. I look down at what I’m wearing, expecting to see me in my plus-sized-pajamas. Instead I see myself wearing a sexy purple lingerie, silk. But I know I don’t own anything like this in my wardrobe. I look back at the mirror and saw that I looked good wearing it. I caress the silk lingerie with care and feel as if I’m wearing them for someone.
But who can that someone be? I thought to myself.
That’s when I hear the familiar clink of my apartment door. Someone just entered. My stomach flutters with excitement. He’s here. His footsteps are coming closer to where I am. I’ve been waiting for him but I don’t know who he is.
Who’s there? I ask, and the sound of his footsteps stop. But the question feels wrong. No, not wrong, absurd. I feel as if I should know, as if I’m missing on something. Why?
For a while I just stand there, puzzled at myself. Why do I not know but feel as if I should know him? As if I do know him?
I walk slowly pass the bookshelf that separates my bed from the small living room, towards where his footsteps stopped. I carry my baseball bat just in case. And then I see him, facing towards the window, his silhouette outlined by the city lights of Manhattan. I lower my bat. Even from the back, I am mesmerized by his beauty. His body, muscled and macho like a calvin klein model. He just stands there, gazing at the window, deep in thought. I realize, I do know him. I know him for a very long time now. He’s important to me.
“Honey, you’re here.” I say, the words escaping my lips before I could think of saying any of them. And yet, I’m not surprised. It feels like I’ve been saying this to him almost every day now. He starts to turn around, and just before I can see his face, I wake up.
I blink my eyes more than necessary. I look at the window beside my bed. Usually I see insects flying or crawling there. Today I see a mosquito.
The morning sunlight streams through my window. Beep beep my alarm goes, Its 7 am. I stop its beeping and let my thoughts linger for a moment. I find it strange, that no matter how much I get used to dreaming it, the amount of curiosity I have never lessens. After a few minutes of self questioning, I get up to do my daily routine. First, I drink water and make breakfast which I eat in silence. And then after that I take a bath and change into my clothes. Unlike other girls, I don’t usually take long in changing clothes, I just wear the hell I want to wear. When I finish, I take a brief look at the mirror, the same mirror I looked at in my dreams. I smile out of habit and as always, my dimples appear in each side of my chubby cheeks. I take my bag from the table and go to work.
***
As I close the door to my apartment building, I was greeted by the smell of strong coffee combined with car smoke, which I breath in and out deeply. Cab horns sound everywhere I go, produced by rush hour traffic and impatient drivers. Typical monday morning, I thought. I struggle finding a cab at first, even bumped to a guy on the way. Thankfully, he was nice enough to help me, and within minutes, he had found me a cab. I say a polite thanks and open the cab door. I look at him once again, from inside the cab. He’s cute, I thought. But no way am I crushing on him. I know his type of women. Probably skinny, with make up filled faces and unboring personalities which is kind of the opposite of me. I thought bitterly.
Mrs. Chang, our boss, was waiting at the meeting room for me when I arrive at work. The expression on her face is smiling and friendly as always, which is neither good nor bad. You can never tell with Mrs. Chang, one day she’s greeting you for a job well done, the next day she’s firing you with the same expression in her face.
The company I work for is called Greetings Corp., and my job here is to write greeting card lines. They say I’m good at it, that I was born to be a greeting card writer, but really I’m just staying by this job for the moment, by moment I mean, for the past 4 years now. I just haven’t found the right publishing house for my book yet.
Today, Mrs. Chang is wearing a silver suit, which looked good on her. The suit complemented her asian features and dora haircut quite well. At first glance, you won’t even notice she’s 53.
“You’re late Rowena. The meeting’s already done.” She says, her face tightening but still managing to smile, she does it with effort.
“I’m sorry ma’am, got stuck in a traffic.” I say as I try to fit myself in one of the chairs.
“That’s okay now, Rowena.” She said, reassuringly while also gesturing me to another seat, larger, with a polite smile.
“With all due respect ma'am, why am I here?” I said, when I finally am seated down. She chuckled. I hate being laughed at, but I don’t show her that.
“What you’re here for is actually very exciting. Do you want to hear it?” she says, with a high spirited tone.
“Sure.” I replied with forced interest.
“We’ve decided to give a major project to you. Its called ‘Spring time, happy time!’. Its a series of greeting cards dedicated for spring season. So you in?”
“Oh, of course, that would be a privilege Mrs. Chang.” I say, even though this is the 4th time I’ve been assigned to this kind of project.
“Wonderful! You’ll be working with a new member by the way, He’s an illustrator. Is that okay? We need someone to show him how things work around here.”
A new member? Hmm, this can’t be all that bad. Working at this company for 4 years now does make you feel a bit sick of the people around you every once in a while, at least we can see a new face. A new person to talk to is certainly fine for me.
“I’ll teach him what I can, Mrs. Chang.”
After I and Mrs. Chang am done chit chatting, I go directly to my desk beside Riley, who is the closest thing I’ve ever had to having a bestfriend. His pale face beautified with all kinds of make ups imaginable and his dark hair dyed with all kinds of hippie colors. He is like a walking rainbow, the absolute definition of LGTB. When he sits, he looks taller than me, contrary to when we’re standing.
“Guuuurrrl, what took you so long? We’ve been waiting for you for like- forever now.” He said, in his gayest voice possible.
“Got stuck in traffic.” I shrug. “So what did I miss?”
“Same old routine. Everybody did well, except Martha’s. You know how persistent she is. But Mrs. Chang wasn’t all that interested in her presentation, we could tell. So when she told Martha, she might not get most of her works published, she didn’t take it well. It was okay at first but then you didn’t come and then we waited for you, she went full retard and stormed out of the room. Jealous much?”
Dearest Martha, my lawful enemy, always trying her best in sabotaging my life. I hear her sobbing from the other corner of the room and I lean over my desk to take a glimpse. She was already glaring at me with her bulged eyes. I bet she’s wishing for me to go to hell. With her yellow sun dress and ginger hair, its kind of hard to tell she’s a bitch.
“Jealous is an understatement.”
“What else?”
“Well, we’ve already done our presentations, so after that there’s not really anything else to anticipate, except finding out who is assigned with the project. But we all know its you.”
“Didn’t Mrs. Chang tell you about the new guy?”
“Everyone! I’ve got an announcement from Mrs. Chang.” Kyle, Mrs. Chang’s assistant, announced.
We all face towards him.
“The spring time happy time project is assigned to none other than, Rowena.” People clap and smile at me, Martha’s face flush with detest, which gave me a moment of satisfaction. I smile back at the others greatfully.
“Also, a new member will be joining our team today-”
A new guy enters the room and all our eyes focus on him. Something in him seems familiar, I know I’ve met him before.
Kyle’s voice begin to fade out in my mind as the new guy walk towards the center of the room. I can hear Riley shrieking in excitement as Kyle gestured the new guy towards where I’m sitting. He walk towards me like a catwalk model. I could feel Riley shaking me hard but I don’t go back to reality yet. I hold my stare and don’t look away when our eyes meet. I’m lost in his pulling gaze.
“Nice to finally meet you, Rowena.” Offering a handshake. When I take it I return to reality. God he’s hot, I’m pretty sure I’m a river down there right now, I thought.
“Oh, umm, nice to meet you too. Sorry for staring, You just- you look so familiar. What’s your name again?”
He smiles and I can see his bright white teeth. I try my best not to show my attraction to him.
“I’m called Daniel, I helped you get a cab this morning, you remember? We kind of bumped into each other.”
“How could I forget? Thank you again.”
“It was nothing. I’m glad it happened. I mean- what a nice coincidence this is. Mrs. Chang said I’ll be working with you.” A nice coincidence indeed.
“Hey, Rowena. I’ll be going to lunch now.” Riley said behind me, happy to be interrupting our conversation. Is it lunch time already? I must’ve been late for hours. I turn to see Riley, his smile teasing me. I forgot about him there for a while. I roll my eyes and say, “Stop it. I’ll catch up with you later.”
“‘Kay, toodles.” Riley said as he walk past us.
I turn back to the new guy, we’re the only ones left in the office now.
“Yeah, I know. Kind of strange in a good way.” I say, trying to sound casual. I think I could kiss Mrs. Chang right now. “So, if you have any questions, you can ask me now.”
“I’ll ask away while we work on the project. So, where do we start?”
“How about a tour of the building?”
“That’d be great. I’ll treat you lunch, so we can start discussing about the project without getting starved.”
“I’d like that.” I say politely.
***
“So, why did you decide on writing greeting cards?” I ask out of curiosity. We’re sitting at the cafeteria eating lunch. By now, we’ve walked almost all the offices in the building. It isn’t really a big building to begin with. I see Martha, a few tables away staring at us.
“You could be a model if you wanted to.” I added, and then regret it as soon as I realize what I said.
He chuckled. “Yeah, I get that a lot. But I don’t like being publicized. So I decided to just become an illustrator for greeting cards. It sounds fun, and I’ve always been into arts.”
“Yeah? Have you been an illustrator before?”
“No, art was just a hobby then. By the way, I have some prototypes back home, I’ll make sure to bring them tomorrow.”
“Great! I-”
“Hi Daniel!”
I look behind and see Martha, grinning at Daniel, skipping around the cafeteria like a 17 year old. Oh god, I thought as I roll my eyes.
“You can come join us in our table if you want to.” She said, filling the aura with her evilness. “You don’t have to work so much already, you’re new here! I’m sure Rowena will understand, right?” She adds, smiling at me with the fakest smile in the entire world, not even celebrities’ million dollar plastic surgeries could compete with its fakeness.
I smile at her mockingly, not trying to hide a single detest I feel for her. Daniel raises his eyebrows. His perfect formed eyebrows that I so want to have.
“I’m quite fine here with Rowena, she hasn’t worn me out. Not just yet.” He winks at me. I don’t know what that means, but it made my insides melt. “I’ll be fine here Martha, Thank you.”
“Okay. But, will you call me later?”
I want to punch her in the face.
“We’ll see.”
Martha smiles at Daniel for the last time and finally walks away, towards her table. She looks back again to glare at me like the immature person that she is. I shrug it off and proceed to discussing the project with Daniel.
But as the day passes on, our talks drift further away from work. Soon we find ourselves talking about our hobbies and experiences. I find out he loves music just as I do but not only that, he also knows how to play the piano. I tell him I love music too, but that I only know how to listen to them. He tells me that listening is an underrated talent. People can listen to music by ear, but few only really listen by heart.
Time flew fast like eagles today. To my surprise, I actually had fun talking to Daniel. We had lots of shared interests and passions. I also find out that he paints every now and then, but he doesn’t sell them. He just keeps him in his home. I asked him why, and he told me it was kind of personal to him. I stopped asking immediately, I wanted to know him, but I didn’t want to pry.
I went home with a smile on my face, which faded shortly when the landlady, Mrs. Tsu showed up at my doorstep. I know exactly why she’s there.
“Don’t worry, I’ll pay right after the check comes in this week.” I smile down at her. She’s old and asian too, but without Mrs. Cheng’s soothing personality. She glares up at me and slowly descends downstairs. I sigh in relief. I’m gonna have to get from my book money for now.
I walk into my apartment, small but cozy. Luckily, the window shows one of the most beautiful views of the Manhattan street lights I’ve ever seen. I stare at it, where the silhouette of the man in my dreams usually stood. I could see Daniel there too, perfectly outlined by the city lights. I shake my head.
Daniel is really nice to me, but that doesn't mean he likes me as something more than a friend or a co-worker. Besides, how do I know I even like him? I barely even know him. And yet…
He seems so familiar. I didn’t get to notice it before but now, I realize I felt a strange familiarity while I was talking to him. Like, I’ve known for a very long time.
That can’t be possible.
I change into my home clothes and sit in the living room. I turn on the TV, get my notebook and scribble my ideas for the project. The noise of the TV is comforting, as I scribble on. I can’t help but anticipate for tomorrow. I’ve never had to scribble my ideas at home. Before, I would just go to work and write whatever the hell I could think about in my desk, and they’d think its a masterpiece.
And now, here I am.
Is this what they call a serendipity?, bumping into him this morning?
I drop my pen in the middle of a thought as I doze off at the couch.
I dream of him again. But this time, it doesn’t start with me looking at the mirror.
I’m in my bed with someone. His scent looming through my nose. I exhale it like cocaine and it makes me feel high. As always, his back is facing me. I realize as I get up that both our bodies are bare. How strange, I’ve never been this exposed before. I’m insecure of my body enough not to show too much skin. And yet, again… I don’t feel any signs of obscurity in this moment. In fact, it feels comforting. In fact, it feels like home.
Is this a dream?, I ask myself. I think not. But it must be a dream, it feels too good to be true. I run my hands through his hair like I do it everyday. Is this the man who owns the silhoutte by the window? The city lights outlining his perfectly formed body?
He moans and I realize this is the first time I hear his voice in my dream. But they sound terrified, like he’s having a bad dream.
“They’re coming. “
“Who's coming?”
He’s shaking now. But he won’t turn around, and I still can’t see his face.
“They’re coming for us Rowena! Hide!” He shouts, but he’s still sleeping.
“Shhh, shhh, no one’s coming, love.” I say, trying to calm him down.
Something’s hit the window. I turn to see what it is, just as a figure opens up the window. The figure was big and bulky. He smelled like dogs. Usually the scent comforts me, but this one is different. I began to tremble in fear.
“Who are you? What do you want?” I hear my own voice waver as I say this. The figure stays
I wake up just in time as the figure stabs a knife through the body next to me.
I bolt awake to the sound of the loud advertisements in the television. I’ve dropped my pen and notebook when I dozed off. I pick them up and hear loud knocks in my door.
As I opened it, I see Mrs. Tsu’s frowning face glaring at me.
“Keep it down!”
“Sorry, sorry. I fell asleep in the couch.”
She glares at me even more and left without another word.
I turn the television off and sigh. Sweat had trickled through my face. That was the creepiest dream I’ve ever had. It seemed so real. I go to bed and tuck myself in. It says 1:32 am in my alarm clock as I see a fly buzzing through my window. I let my thoughts wander from unicorns to mythical gods, anything to keep myself from remembering the nightmare I just had. Anything, to keep myself from succumbing into fear.
I fell asleep once again. But this time, I don’t dream anything.
***
The next few days, Daniel and I begin our brainstorming. He presents all his prototypes to me as I scribble down quotes about it in my notebook. I feel the tingling familiarity again, but I don’t say anything. Instead, I keep my head low, and avoid eye contacts with him as much as I can. I force myself to look at him every once in a while, just so he doesn’t get suspicious of my avoiding him. I suggest improvements about his illustrations to me and he does the same about my writing. Even with the awkward aura, we manage to finish half of the total 100 required designs for the spring season in less than 2 weeks. Mrs. Cheng is very pleased with us that she’s given all the investors a copy of our samples. Its nerveracking enough presenting an idea to the investors, sending them samples has got to take a lot of guts, even though it seemed that simple. The company had a reputation to keep after all.
We are an incredible team, Mrs. Cheng had said to us when we reported our progress to her. Two peas in a pod. I smile shyly as Riley teases us when I tell him about it on our way to lunch.
“You did a very good job Rowena. I was lucky to have you as my partner.” Daniel says, and I don’t know how I can still stand in front of him when deep inside I know I’m falling. I’m falling? I can’t be falling too fast. I have to remember my dreams, my book, I can’t have distractions right now. Especially not with my co-worker.
“That’s very nice of you to say Daniel, you did just as well.”
I say that to him genuinely. I can’t have my feelings bias my judgements. I remind myself that I have a goal, that I have a dream. And that is where I should put my focus on, not this petty crush.
My good mood finally began flourishing until Martha came to my vision.
“Hi Rowena! You look nice in that sweatshirt. Really hides your belly very well. Mind if I have lunch with Daniel today?” She said.
How can so much evil be inside in this girl? She’s even wearing sparkling shoes for christ’s sake. Literally sparkling shoes.
Glitter was everywhere Martha’s feet landed on. But she was obviously not pleased about all this. She manages to drag Daniel to her table before I can even reply. He was nice enough not to refuse. I sigh. The tightness in my chest, which I didn’t notice ‘till he left is slowly lifting away. Daniel’s expression was sorry. I shake my head and smile at him, so he knows its okay for me.
Why does he even need my opinion about this? He can have lunch with whoever he wants to. But why do I feel this lump in my throat? As if I don’t approve of him having lunch with that bitch? No, I can’t be jealous. I shake my head for what seemed to be the millionth time that day. I’m not jealous, I tell myself.
“Girl, you jealous?” Riley asked.
“No.” I said, rather abruptly.
“You’re jealous. I can see it your eyes.”
“There’s nothing in my eyes”
Riley sighed. “You can be as defensive as you want. But I know in my heart that you’re jealous. “
“Whatever.” I say as I roll my eyes at him.
At lunch, I don’t talk to Riley. I just sit there and let him do all the talking. I nod with disinterest as he asks me unimportant questions. Blah blah blah he goes. I don’t know why I’m like this, but I feel like he’s exposed me, like an open book. I’ve spent enough time with open people that I know how not to be like them.
After lunch, I realize how stupid I am for ignoring Riley. After all, I’ve considered him as the closest thing I’ve ever had to having a bestfriend. That must mean something, right? So as a peace offering, I ask him about the projects he’s been doing. He replied like nothing ever happened that lunch. I’m not sure he knew I was mad at him, but nevertheless, this should make everything better.
“You need any help?” I ask.
“Nah, I can do this. Plus you’ve got a lot more to do with Daniel.” He says ‘Daniel’ with obvious emphasis. He glances towards Martha and Daniel, in the other corner of the room. She still hasn’t let him go yet. Daniel was staring at me while Martha was gaping all over him. He shrugged and formed a gun with his hand and shot himself with it. Martha laughed annoyingly loud. She doesn’t even notice his looking at me. I had to laugh, Daniel laughs too.
When I look at Riley again, he was smirking at me. He was even singing, ‘Daniel and Rowena sitting in the tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G’. I shook my head and smile. It made me think about kissing Daniel. His lips into mine, my hands brushing his beautiful hair. For a while, I stare at nothing, thinking about it, with my mouth half open. Riley’s singing puts be back to reality. I cover my face when I realize I’ve been blushing.
***
3 weeks later, we finally finished the project. Everyone was happy with the results, especially Mrs. Chang.
After work that day, me and Daniel decide to have a little picnic. Even though it was a little late for that. We bought books from the library and read them together.
It was a happy night for me. Just reading and looking at the stars, talking about our dreams in life. I’ve found out a lot about him in our 3 weeks of working together. I noticed that whenever the questions become too personal, he switches the subject into something else, which I absolutely understand. I don’t blame him for not trusting me. After all, it’s not like we’ve known each other for a long time now.
“The stars are beautiful tonight.” I say.
“They’re always beautiful.” He says, but I get the feeling that he’s not talking about the stars.
He’s staring at me. I shift uncomfortably as I realize this. I didn’t even take the chance to put lipstick today.
“Yeah. I just didn’t notice it ‘till now.”
“I’ve always noticed before.” He tells me, still staring at me.
What do I do? I feel myself panicking, I don’t like being looked at for too long.
“Umm, want to grab pizza?” I ask, trying to change the subject. I turn to him, his bright blue google eyes still staring at me.
“Look I-”
“I’m in love with you Rowena.”
No, this is not happening. I don’t believe this is happening.
“I don’t know what to say.”
“These past few weeks have been the happiest I’ve ever been,... I’ve never felt this feeling in my entire life. I’ve been with other girls before but… they’re not like you. You’re smart, professional, witty and all things I thought I might never find in one girl and yet, here you are! I just wanted to tell that, I’m just so happy that you exist and that I get to meet you and that…”
And that what? I think I know what he’s going to say, but I don’t know if I’m ready to hear it.
“And that I love you.” He says it at last and stomach feels like I had eaten fireworks. “Its okay, you don’t have to say it back.” He added.
I found myself speechless. This guy just said the most beautiful things anyone has ever said to me. I never thought I’d hear these words in my entire life. I stare at his eyes, and realize the truth. The truth I’ve been trying to hide for weeks now.
“I love you too.”
His face lifts up into a smile. He hugs me tight and I hug him back tighter. I can’t believe how happy I am. I will remember this for the rest of my life.
He leans toward me, I realize I’ve been staring at his lips. Oh, how it would feel to have his lips on mine. He leans closer, as if he’s read my thoughts and my heart beats faster than ever.
“I want to kiss you.” He whispers.
“Then kiss me.” I tell him, and he does.
He kisses my lightly at first, but the longer we kiss, the more intense it gets. He begins kissing my neck, and oh it feels paradise to me. He had aroused something in me that I had never thought existed before.
We get into my apartment, trying to control our turned-on bodies as we ascend to the stairs. Each heartbeat of mine feels like an atomic explosion. I get my keys and open the door. Quickly we get inside and he kisses me with such passion and starts caressing my ass.
“Nice ass” He says as he smacks it softly. I bit my lip, I can’t control myself now. I’m so horny.
We make our way into my bed as I take his clothes off, pass the bookshelf. We’re half naked as we reach my bed. He’s on top of me now. I open up his zipper and take his pants off, he does the same to my panties. He kisses me all the way down to my...
“Oh, Daniel” I moan in pleasure. He’s so good with his tongue down there, I can’t not moan.
“I want to make you feel good. I want to please you.” He says, and I swear I’m melting. After that, he steadies himself, I feel it, its hard and big. He puts it in position and pushes it forward.
I moan even more, I don’t care if Mrs. Tsu hears it.
He kisses me all over my body and I can’t help but want even more.
Every push and pull felt like heaven. Oh Daniel. His scent is all over me. I can’t think straight anymore. We are gasping for air when we finish. He kisses me one last time in my forehead. So familiar...
We both fell asleep after, and I dream again.
I’m looking at the mirror, wearing the purple lingerie. I’ve dreamt this before, I know what’s going to happen. I hear the clink of the door, and just as I thought, footsteps start coming towards me. I walk to where footsteps came from and find him standing there, outlined by the streetlights. As usual I say, “Honey, you’re here.”
I’ve expected myself to wake up, but I don’t. Instead I keep dreaming this time, and was able to finally see his face. When the man turned around, I was able to see Daniel’s face.
I wake up suddenly. Daniel is the man in my dreams, I realize. But that can’t be true, impossible. I’ve never met him before. I turn to my side expecting him to be there, but he’s not. Maybe it was all just a dream. But I know, last night was real, if not then, why am I naked right now?
I don’t know why Daniel snuck out of the apartment. But for all I know, maybe he’s just in a hurry. What time is it anyway?
I look at the clock, its 8 am. I’m late for work again.
I quickly do my morning routine and go to work.
When I arrive at work, I find myself anticipating to see Daniel. I ask Riley, he says he didn’t see Daniel this morning.
I didn’t see Daniel for the rest of the day. I don’t know why. Didn’t he just say to me, the other night that he loved me? Maybe it was joke. If it was, then it certainly pissedme off.
Days pass. Daniel still hadn’t showed up at work. People are beginning to wonder where he’s been. I tell them I don’t know. Martha is spreading lies about it, that attention seeking bitch. She’s been telling everyone about Daniel going on vacation and that he’s asked her to come with her.
“Then why are you still here?” I ask when I overhear her talking.
“Eavesdropping much?” she says, and I roll my eyes at her. “Oh, just drop it down Rowena, I know you’ve always been jealous of me. And now you can’t handle it that Daniel prefers me. How could you ever think that Daniel would want someone like you?”
I ignore her and walk away. I murder Martha inside my head a lot of times as I walk home. I wasn’t assigned any new work anyway.
The next day I am called at the meeting room with Mrs. Cheng, 2 days after we’ve passed final output to her. Presenting it to the entire office had been fun, since Daniel had gotten along with almost everyone in the office. He’s even close with Julius, the office janitor. Daniel is all kinds of nice and pretty, and everyone wants to get along with him.
I remember when we finished with our presentation that day, everyone in the room clapped. It was by far the best project I’ve had since day 1 here at Greetings Corp.. After the presentation. All of the office staff went to a bar to celebrate, I didn’t go with them.
“Are you listening, Rowena?” Mrs. Cheng asked.
“Yes.” I say, even though I’m not.
“Oh there you are Daniel!”
I look around and there he is, entering the meeting room. I want to ask so many questions, but I control myself. I don’t want to look like I’m not a professional. I don’t want to look like I care.
“Sorry for being absent Mrs. Cheng. I was sick and I didn’t have anyone to tell you for me.” He continues talking, ignoring me, like I don’t exist at all. I don’t understand him. I thought he loved me.
When Mrs. Cheng let us go, instead of asking him all my questions, I ignore him. It hurts me not talking to him this way, but it hurts more that he’s not talking to me. That he’s fine ignoring me this way. Riley notices my coldness towards Daniel and tried to ask me about it. I told him I wasn’t feeling well today. I advises that I go home to rest. I do as he advised.
As I got outside the building, I realize Daniel has been following me. I turn around to look at him, my eyes very close to crying now.
“I’m so sorry, but we can’t be together Rowena.”
“Why?”
“I’m not- I’m not like the others. You deserve someone who’s better than me.”
“I don’t understand Daniel! You tell me you love me but you say we can’t be together! I don’t understand any of this at all.”
“I’m so sorry.” That’s all he says. And I walk away.
That night, I cry my heart out in my apartment. I shouldn’t have told him I love him too. I shouldn’t have let him inside my heart. I shouldn’t have…
I can feel my heart breaking into several pieces as I think through all things I shouldn’t have done. I hear a knock in my door.
“Who’s that?”
“Its me, Rowena.” I hear Daniel’s voice from the outside of my room. I don’t get him at all. Just recently today he’d told me we can’t be together, and now here he is in my apartment.
“I need to talk to you.” He added
“I just don’t feel like talking.” I told Daniel.
“Please I have something to explain to you.” I don’t talk back to him. I thought maybe if I just leave him there, he’ll go away and I can finally cry in peace. But even after midnight, he’s still at my door.
“Okay.” I finally let him in.
“I’m really sorry about- everything.” He says. “But there’s something you need to know about me. I’m not safe. You’re not safe with me.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m not normal.”
“What?” I am so confused right now.
“Its something like a disease.”
oh my god, what if…
“Do you have HIV?” I ask.
“No, no” He laughs and then turns serious again. “Its not that. Its not a contagious disease.”
“Then, you need someone to take care of you.”
“No, its not safe.”
“But I thought it isn’t contagious.”
“Its not safe for you.”
“But what if I don’t care about my safety.”
“I care.” He says, sternly.
“You don’t know how beautiful you are Rowena.”
“That’s not true, I’m not beautiful. Maybe I’m just not beautiful enough for you to say” I say, looking down.
Daniel gets up from his chair and walks closer towards me.
“You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met Rowena. That’s why I’m doing this… to keep you safe..If only I had the chance..”
“What chance?” I ask, suddenly. I look into his eyes and I know he’s hiding something from me.
“No, you can’t know this.”
“I can’t know wha-”
And suddenly his lips is on mine. And I can’t think of anything else except him and me, as if the world doesn’t exist anymore.
I take his clothes off him as he takes mine with intensity. I can feel he’s been trying for us to not end up this way again but we can’t control our bodies anymore. I sit on top of him, my breast exposed now, caressed by his hands. He opens up my zipper and I do the same to him. Within seconds, we are naked. I see all of him and he can see all of me. I am in love with this man. And I don’t care if I get hurt so bad, all I know is that I want to be with him for as long as I live.
He lays me softly to the bed.
“Oh honey, I’ve missed you so much.” He says and then he pushes inside me.
I moan as pleasure take control of my entire body. I know then that I’ve felt like this before, that this is not my first time. But I can’t remember when or who.
All my doubts are fading away like chalks in a black board. Pleasure, lust and Daniel, the only things that I can think off. And the rest of the night, that’s all we do.
***
The next morning, I wake up to see I’m sleeping with a beetle beside me. Where’s Daniel? I thought as I stroke the beetle. I knew he’d be gone. Last night, last night was his way of saying goodbye to me. I feel a lump in my throat again, I feel like crying. And then the strangest thing happened.
The beetle became Daniel, sleeping soundlessly like an innocent child. I don’t understand, what’s happening. I rub my eyes, just to make sure I’m not dreaming again. But it was real. The beetle- it turned into Daniel. He opens his eyes and gets up… He sees my puzzled expression and knows exactly what had happened.
“What are you?!” I say to him.
“I’m sorry Rowena- I can explain-.”
“WHAT ARE YOU?!”
“I told you last night…”
“Is this the disease you we’re talking about?”
“No,.. I’m sorry I lied to you..”
“Lied to me? I- I’m sorry. It must be me, maybe I’m just seeing things. Tell me I’m seeing things Daniel.”
“You’re not seeing things. Its my fault. They can’t know that you are already aware of my condition again. No, they’ll take you away.”
again… has this happened before?
“What do you mean again?”
“I’m sorry, I have to go.”
I fall silent. I don’t know what to say. This can’t be true. I feel anger rushing through my heart. I feel my eyes stinging as tears began to flow.
“GET OUT.”
“Rowena, I’m sorry. This is what I’ve been telling you last night! This is why we can’t be together!”
“I said, GET OUT OF MY APARTMENT!”
“I’ll always protect you, remember that!” Daniel says, as he picks up his clothes. He looks at me one last time and transforms into a fly and flies past my window.
All those insects in my window. That was him.
***
“Congratulations Rowena! Daniel! You’ve done very well, the investors liked your work very much! They even doubled their investments, this is good news! We have to celebrate!” Mrs. Chang exclaimed. She’s practically dancing to herself now. We are at the meeting room a few weeks after Daniel transformed into a fly and flew past my window.
Mrs. Cheng was so happy because our project sold well, she did not even notice the awkwardness between us.
I spent the entire day concentrating on working on the new project assigned to me, and listening to Riley talk about this guy he met at the bar.
After work, I decide to walk home alone.
“Do you want to get coffee or dinner?” I hear Daniel’s voice behind me.
I don’t say anything. I don’t get him at all. I don’t get our relationship. We are worst than a roller coaster ride.
“Rowena, you can’t keep ignoring me forever.”
“And you can’t keep following me forever” I snap back at him.
“Im sorry. okay? But you know why I’m doing this. You know why we can’t- why we can’t be together!” Daniel yelled suddenly, unable to conceal his feelings anymore.
“Don’t think I don’t know that Daniel! I’ve been telling myself that for the past few weeks and still I can’t get you out of my mind! You say, you don’t want to be with me but here you are following me and asking me for dinner? or coffee? I don’t get it!”
“I just want to protect you Rowena!”
“Protect me from what?!”
Daniel falls silent and I take the opportunity to walk away. I can’t take it anymore.
I walk faster enough and I pray to God for him to stop following me. I finally reach my apartment. The moment I close the door, I cry my heart out.
Its so unfair. Why can’t I get the one I want? Why?
That’s when I hear someone, by the window.
“Stop right there.” I say, getting my bat, ready to strike at Daniel.
But instead, its not Daniel that I see. Its another man.
“Hello Rowena. Long time no see.” He says, his voice sending shivers through my spine
“Who are you? What do you want from me?” I say, holding my bat tighter.
“Just an old friend. You probably don’t remember me anymore.” He says.
I realize, he does look familiar. I do know him. He was a bulky man, with white sleeveless shirt. He was handsome, but the evil look in him would make any person cower.
“What are you doing here?”
“Stop right there Harold!” I hear a voice behind me, its Daniel.
“What a pleasant surprise Daniel!”
“Who sent you here?” He asks.
The guy laughed. “Do you really have to ask that? I know you know the answer to that question Daniel. It was stupid of you to come here again Daniel. You know it won’t be long that we’ll find out about this.”
“Sierro.” Daniel said.
Sierro. Who is he? I feel like an idiot, watching them both circling around each other.
And when I blink my eye, I see a wolf where the man stood. “You’ll be a nice snack.” he says as he launches at me.
We hit the wall hard. I feel my head throb with pain. The last thing I see is Daniel transforming into a wolf himself. I know because he’s color is different from Harold. And then I see no more.
***
I dream of my husband.
I dream of the first time I saw him.
I was in the local cafe, writing for my book when I saw him with what seemed to be his best friend. I stared at him for a long time then, he was so handsome and perfect. I order another frap just to get more time, so I could stare at him more. I notice that wherever he and his best friend goes, they never fail to grab everybody’s attention. They are the definition of swag. Right now, both of them seem to be staring at the group of girls a few tables far from them. I realize then, who am I to want him? Look at me, I’m not even fit for the pants I’m wearing, how can I say I’m fit for him then?
Days pass, I notice that he and his best friend kept coming there more often, so I come there, just as much. Not a month later, I make friends with him. I find out that his name is Daniel and that his best friend is named Harold. We became friends and talked about all our dreams. I told him I wanted to be a writer. He’d told me he wanted to be nothing else but happy.
We had so many shared interests, music, books, you name it all. But Daniel had had a girlfriend then, her name was Elaine. She was tall and slim and perfect. She was fit for him and she was so in love with him, I could tell. Who wouldn’t be in love with him? She was also just as nice, and we became friends too. Not for long, the two of them broke up. I didn’t know why, but whatever reason it was, I never saw Elaine again.
A few months later, we finally became more than friends. It was the best days of my life. At first, Harold was nice enough to hang out with us. But sooner he’s coming with Daniel became less frequent. And then, before he had asked me to marry him, he showed me his true nature. I was afraid at first, but I love him so much that I’m willing to take the risk just to be with him. And then we got married. No one of our friends and family came to our wedding. I have no family, I’m an orphan, and I didn’t make any lasting friendships. Daniel’s family didn’t approve of me, because I was human. They see me as a threat.
The first few months of our marriage we’re a bliss. We rented an apartment in Manhattan, new york. I continued my writing, while he did illustrating. At last our dreams came true.
I was writing, and he was happy.
But one night, after all the caution that we’ve done, Harold found us. He attacked Daniel. He paid a warlock to wipe away my memory of him.
When I wake up, I’m at the hospital.
The temperature is much warmer than I’m used to. I am sweating.
Where’s Daniel? It was the first thing I thought of. I remember everything now. I want to tell him that, about our past, about our first few months as married couple. I remember that now. I’ve accepted him for who he is, but he’s clan, the Wolf and Shape shifter folks, they don’t trust me because I’m not like them. And that’s why they made me forget him. Those dreams I had, they weren’t dreams. They were memories.
I see Daniel as he enters my room, he’s carrying food. He runs to me immediately when he sees that I’m awake.
“Rowena, you’re awake now!”
“Daniel! honey, I remember everything now. Everything about us.”
“I’m so happy. For a moment I thought I’ve lost you forever.”
“Daniel, what happened to you after they wiped my memory?”
His expression became grim. “They tried to wipe mine as well, they tried to marry me off with Elaine. But I remembered you not long after. I managed to escape before our marriage.”
“What happened to Harold? Where are we?”
“Don’t worry now Rowena. We’re far away, they won’t catch us here yet. I defeated Harold, he got away just in time before I could kill him.”
I remember now, Sierro and the pack, they’ve been hunting us down because they disapprove of our marriage.
“What about Mrs. Tsu? Did she notice the mess we’ve made in the apartment.”
“Don’t worry about that. I’ve managed to pay the local warlock and he cleaned the place for us. Your bills are already paid.”
“Thank you. but… Where are we? Its warm in here. Are we in a different country?”
“Shhh, rest for now, Rowena. I will answer your questions when you are healed.”
“But--”
“Don’t worry, we are safe for now, my love.” Daniel says.
THE END