I didn’t want to admit it but I found the entire college experience overwhelming. My expectations were that once I landed at Berkeley, I’d be off and running but I found myself more jogging around in circles.

Didn’t I just pass this building? Is this map purposely trying to mess with my head?

I was staying in residence for the first year but I had already started seeking out leads for a house for the second year. I could tell I wasn’t going to fare well inside the dorms. It reminded me too much of home already with the noise and fighting, even if it was done in banter. I wanted some peace and quiet, something I could only find in the corner of my room, with my earbuds in. That wasn’t what I was looking for.

Even still, I forced myself to ignore the outside noise that I’d been trained to do for so long. My parents’ endless bickering had taught me well after all. I could get through my first year—I was halfway there anyway.

I’d been home and back for Christmas break, an awkward affair since Gray hadn’t been there. He’d been invited to the Laurier’s for dinner and while we had too, my parents steadfastly refused “to have anything to do with those people.”

Personally, I was relieved. It was uncomfortable enough sitting through Mom and Dad’s not-so-passive/aggressive jabs at one another. I couldn’t imagine what it would be like sitting through an entire meal with the Lauriers.

Especially not after what happened at the wedding.

I shivered slightly as the thought of Mal crossed my mind, despite the warmth of the California sun on my face.

It was January in the Golden State and even though the locals considered it cold, the temperatures dropping to fifty-five degrees, it was outright balmy to me. My DNA was made for this weather, not the bitter cold of Colorado. I was home, even if I didn’t know anyone.

Across the campus, I could see the students who also hailed from colder climates. Some of my fellow classmates even donned shorts to commemorate their first time celebrating a winter without snow.

“Hey Blake!”

I turned at the sound of my name and watched as Beth Jansen scampered toward me, her dark bob fanning in the wind. I slowed to let her approach.

“Hey.”

“You going to Peterson’s lecture today?”

“Do I have a choice?” I asked hopefully. If there was a way I could skip the man’s sonorous drone for two hours, I would happily have taken it but Beth laughed.

“Not if we want to pass oceanography.”

It was supposed to be fun, getting a bachelor’s in science. I had always had a passion for biology after all and high school had made the subject interesting. Who would have thought that listening to Professor Peterson drone on about microorganisms would make me want to lapse into a coma? It made me long for high school…well, not really. I might have missed the classes but I didn’t miss the people.

College was an entirely different experience. No one cared that I wanted to keep to myself. I was surrounded by other nerds like me, ones who weren’t ridiculed for reading. Not to say there wasn’t a slew of jocks and princesses but they were easily avoided. And next year I’d be living off campus and away from the frat boys and sorority girls. Then I would be completely free of any reminder of my childhood. Or so I hoped.

“I’m having a get together on Friday night at my dorm,” Beth told me, huffing as she tried to keep up the pace. She was a chunky girl and the first friend I’d make since coming to Berkeley. I liked her but she was a little bit of a hanger-on. I was probably being over-sensitive. I hadn’t ever really had people want to spend time with me the way Beth wanted to and I didn’t know how to handle it.

“Uh…sure, that sounds good,” I told her. “What’s the occasion?”

“It’s my birthday,” she replied and I arched an eyebrow in surprise.

“Well that sucks,” I laughed. “You must get ripped off, it being so close to Christmas.”

Beth chuckled.

“Don’t I know it.”

I nodded slowly.

“What time?”

“Anytime after seven is good.”

“What can I bring?”

“Just yourself. It won’t be a big thing. Just a few friends, some drinks, maybe some Just Dance.”

I groaned to myself but maintained the smile on my face. The idea of a bunch of geeks dancing around to a video game made me cringe.

“Sounds good, Beth.”

We paused in front of Valley Life Science Building and Beth sighed.

“I’ve gotta pee. I’ll meet you inside.”

I nodded and watched as she waddled off toward the bathrooms but before I could climb the steps to the entrance, I saw something out of the corner of my eye and I whirled, my heart pounding.

Was that who I thought it was?

He was gone though and I wondered if my mind was playing tricks on me. It had happened a lot since the wedding—I thought I caught a glimpse of Malcolm Laurier in the weirdest spots but of course that was ridiculous. He was wherever he was—far away from Berkeley. I assumed he was at some private college that his parents had bought their way into. I couldn’t envision that Mal had the grades to attend college otherwise. I would never have to see him again, not unless I ran into him when I was visiting my parents and that was unlikely since I rarely left the house when I was in Sterling.

The wedding between my brother and his sister had been a whirlwind of bitter emotions which had reached a fever pitch at the reception. I was a little surprised my mom hadn’t made a scene in the church but I privately wondered if Dad hadn’t slipped her a Xanax or something to keep her quiet.

It wasn’t until she’d gotten into the champagne that she confronted Carmen Laurier. I couldn’t be sure how the conversation had started but I remember watching in horrified fascination as their respective husbands yanked the women apart and dragged them into separate parts of the massive banquet hall.

“Your mom is a piece of work,” a voice in my ear had rasped and I spun to glare at Mal with contempt.

“My mom?” I retorted. “Have you seen what your parents raised?”

I was referring to both him and his sister, of course. We glared at one another but I couldn’t help but notice how attractive he looked in his tux. Mal had stood up with Grayson, a fact which had annoyed me endlessly but I didn’t say anything to my brother. It wasn’t like he was going to do anything to upset the Princess, no matter what my opinion was on the matter. He’d made his choice and there wasn’t anything anyone could do about it.

If he wants this oversexed pig to stand up at his wedding, who am I to say boo?

Secretly I wondered if I wasn’t mad because Ella hadn’t asked me to stand in her wedding party. She had chosen her friends and a cousin without even asking me, further enhancing my poor opinion of her. I was certain she’d forced Grayson to include Mal on his side. Why couldn’t Grayson insist that I was a bridesmaid too?

I didn’t want to stand up with those phonies anyway, I thought firmly even though I was well aware of how petulant I sounded in my own head. I had a good case of sour grapes and I hated myself for it.

These were just things that never occurred to me before the Lauriers had forced their way into our lives.

“You’re much prettier when you smile,” Mal mocked me and my scowl deepened.

“I wish I could say you’re more attractive when you shut your mouth but that’s not true.”

He grinned disarmingly.

“I know. I’m hot no matter what I do.”

I hated the way he twisted my words and I hated even more that he was right. Smiling or not, he was gorgeous.

He’s a gorgeous, arrogant prick. Why do good looks always fall to the undeserving?

I turned to leave him but he grabbed my arm, the feel of his hand over my bare skin sending a fission of unexpected heat through my body.

Get it together, Blake. You’re probably going to get cooties now.

“Let’s get a drink,” he suggested and to my absolute shock, I found myself nodding before I could refuse. Instead, I let him lead us toward one of the two bars set up in the ballroom.

“What are you drinking?”

“Vodka and OJ,” I replied. Recklessly, I added, “Make it a double.”

The bartender nodded, not bothering to ask us for ID as Mal ordered a beer.

“That went better than I expected,” he commented and I eyed him through my peripheral vision.

“What did? The ceremony?” I asked dubiously and he nodded.

“You think so?”

“I thought for sure your parents would make a scene, stand up and protest the union.”

I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to tell him I was just as surprised. I had half expected my mom to thrust a handful of photographs forward, courtesy of some PI she’d hired to follow Ella or something equally ridiculous. I had to admit, Mal was right—it could have gone a lot worse.

The bartender slid the drinks over the bar and Mal handed me mine. Our fingers brushed and once more, I was overwhelmed by heat by his touch.

Seriously, Blake? I yelled at myself. This is Malcolm Laurier. He’s not only the brother of the wretched Princess, he’s the biggest man-whore in school.

“It was inevitable that they got at one another sooner or later,” Mal continued, taking a sip of his beer. “But at least they waited until the wedding was official.”

He was still talking about our parents still but I was struggling to maintain the heat rising in my face. I didn’t want him to see my face turning crimson but it was becoming difficult to hide.

I still didn’t say anything and followed his lead, pressing the straw to my lips and sucking back the drink easily.

I couldn’t even taste the vodka.

“Are you still standing here?” Beth demanded from the top landing. “What’s wrong?”

I had completely zoned out, staring after nothing and Beth had apparently already gone to and returned from the bathroom.

“Yeah…I just thought I saw someone I knew,” I muttered, striding up the steps to meet her.

It was just a stupid, drunken kiss six months ago. What do you want to bet that Mal doesn’t even remember it?

Ugh. I needed to stop. I couldn’t believe it had happened at all but as I overanalyzed it like I did everything, I knew that it had only occurred as a way for both of us to outlet our frustration. Mal certainly had no interest in me romantically and it didn’t matter how attractive I found him, there was no way I would ever entertain dating someone like Malcolm Laurier.

Or maybe I had just told myself that knowing that there was no way he would entertain dating someone like me.

He’d be no different than Chance Edwards, trying to pop my cherry. I can only imagine what that locker room conversation would sound like.

I cringed at the memory. I had been uninhibited enough in that coatroom at the wedding to have let it gone further than it did, a combination of the alcohol and the hate bond we shared overwhelming my common sense. Had I just gone there with Mal to stick it to my family in some childish way, half-hoping to get caught and cause another scene? That would be a play right out of my mom’s playbook, after all.

If the coat check guy hadn’t come back when he did, I would have been regretting a lot more those days than I already did.

But it did explain why I kept thinking I saw Mal everywhere after the wedding, even in California.

Ironically, I didn’t see him once in Sterling when I went home over the holidays, not even in my mind. I’d thought the hallucinations were done. I guess I was wrong.

We made our way into the auditorium which was already filled with students, ready to sleep though Peterson’s lecture and found seats near the center of the room.

“Okay people,” Prof Peterson intoned from the podium. “Settle down.”

“He’s wasting his talents teaching oceanography. He should be a hypnotist,” Beth muttered and several of the students around us tittered at her comment. It was a good observation. I could already feel my lids getting heavy and the man hadn’t even started speaking.

“Probably more money in it,” someone nearby added and we chuckled again. The students were all getting into mocking the unsuspecting prof.

“He’s a walking cadaver. I swear he’s a vampire.”

“More like the Grim Reaper. I can feel my soul being sucked right out of me as we sit here.”

My blood ran cold. I recognized that last voice and my head whipped around to stare into the smoky grey eyes of Malcolm Laurier who sat two rows back, encircled in a flock of admirers as always.

Quickly, I jerked my head back. He hadn’t seen me, I didn’t think. Or if he did, he made no outward comment.

I hadn’t been imagining it—I had seen him and now he was in the same breathing space as me.

“Are you quite finished with your giggling up there on the left?” Peterson snapped in our direction and everyone stopped snickering in unison. I sank into my seat, wanting to disappear entirely but of course I couldn’t be that lucky.

What was he doing here? Visiting? He sure as hell hadn’t been in that lecture hall before—I would have noticed for sure.

I thought of all the times I had thought I’d seen him on campus and suddenly I was mortified.

I had no idea whether he’d decided to go to college or if he had gone anywhere although I was sure he had. The man was our high school’s golden boy after all. But had he come to Berkeley?

More humiliation filled my face. It wasn’t like we’d done much talking at the wedding or before.

But we stuck our tongues down each other’s throats just fine.

The campus was huge—it wouldn’t be strange to have overlooked him for three months…would it?

I was so confused and I eyed Beth whose eyes were already growing hazy as Peterson began his lecture.

“Beth,” I hissed. She glanced at me.

“What?”

“Do you know that guy, two rows back? The dark haired one with the intense grey eyes?”

She looked behind her and I stifled a groan. I hadn’t wanted her to look but it was too late now.

“Uh…he looks familiar. I think I’ve seen him around the dorm. Damn! He’s sexy!”

Her voice was much louder than it should have been and there was another round of light laughter. I silently prayed to any god who might be available that the floor swallow me whole.

“You know him?” Beth asked hopefully. I shook my head curtly but kept my eyes firmly planted on the podium. I didn’t want to risk even the slightest chance that I might catch Mal’s gaze in my view. If he hadn’t seen me before, thanks to Beth, he’d certainly seen me now.

All I could do was figure out a plan to escape the hall without having to speak one word to him.

Because I had been thrust into another dimension, some parallel world where Malcolm Laurier attended Berkeley, Peterson’s sermon flew by for the first time ever and he was done before I even knew what had happened.

“That was extra brutal,” Beth chirped, rising from her chair. “You coming?”

I didn’t move. I wanted to make sure Mal left first.

God, what if he’s waiting for me? What will I say to him?

“In a minute,” I muttered, slowly turning my head. I was sure that he’d be waiting in the aisle, staring at me with that lazy smirk which made me want to punch his face but to my shock, he was gone, along with his flock.

He hadn’t even noticed me.

Disappointment flooded me and I swallowed the weird lump in my throat.

But why should he notice me? He’s still the same jerk he was in high school, kiss or no kiss, in-law or not. He’s still the same guy I’ve always hated.

Screw Mal. Whatever he was doing at Berkeley had nothing to do with me. Nothing had changed, even if he was a student there. I’d just have to learn how to avoid him.