Chapter 13
The Stresses of Entertaining
Evelyn was nervous, which was a major distraction. “Can I get you something to drink? I have milk, water, iced tea, or apple juice.” She sounded like a moron. Certain words didn’t fit in her vocabulary, too awkward in comparison to the life she had and the way she attempted to live now.
Jason settled into the chair at the table and sifted through his bag. “Iced tea would be nice.”
With shaky hands she twisted the ice trays and plopped two cubes in a glass. Jason knew a little about her background, but she didn’t want to volunteer too much. The last thing she wanted was to appear illiterate and uncultured. He’d already discovered how little she could read, so she gave him her favorite glass in hopes that it compensated for some level of sophistication. Smart people usually had nicer things.
Settling into the chair next to him, she slid him the beverage. He sipped it and thanked her. “How did you make out yesterday?”
Her hands slid the paperwork in front of him and she waited anxiously. Most of the stuff she had to go through at work whenever there was a lull in shoppers. Luckily, Nick was there to answer any questions and Mr. Gerhard was surprisingly quiet today, not getting on her back over every little thing like he usually did.
“Um, it was okay. I think I understood most of it. I didn’t get very far. Oh, before I forget . . .” She reached into her pocket and removed the envelope of cash.
Jason took it and smiled. “Thanks. It’s a lot easier for me to deal in cash with things like this. I appreciate it.”
“Thank you. I’m glad I found you. That’s only two thousand. When you need more let me know.”
His eyes bulged. “Uh, Evelyn, most people pay me by the hour.”
She knew that, but she was so afraid he’d get frustrated and quit on her that she wanted to pay him in advance. “Well, consider your first twenty hours handled. We already used four of them anyway.”
He shook his head. “Then let’s get to work.”
There was a sharp knock on the door and she frowned. “I’m sorry, let me see who that is. The people in the office downstairs said my electric bill would be in soon. That’s probably them dropping it off.”
“Not a problem. I’ll look over this stuff.”
She stood and quickly rushed down the steps and unlatched the door. She came up short when she peeped through the hole and found Lucian glaring on the other side. Her hand fumbled to unlock the door. “Lucian? Wh-what are you doing here?”
“Is this a bad time?” His dark eyes narrowed on her, full of suspicion. Chances were, if she peeked around the corner she’d find Dugan—who was really starting to piss her off. Didn’t these people have work? “As a matter of fact—”
“Invite me in.”
She stiffened. Okay, clearly he knew she had company. Not wanting to make a scene, she eased the door closed and stepped into the alley. “Why are you doing this?” she hissed.
“Who is he?”
Once again, he’d bulldozed into her personal business with no regard to her privacy. “Damn it, Lucian, you can’t keep doing this! Not every part of my life is open to you, and you need to accept that.”
“Bullshit. This is your private home. I get that you need this right now, but how would you feel if some woman was visiting me at the penthouse? Call it whatever you like, Evelyn, but fair is fair. You can’t hold a double standard.”
She gripped her temples, very aware of her pricey minutes with Jason ticking by. “Can we talk about this later?”
“I’m not leaving until you give me some answers.”
Just once, she wanted something to be her own. Bristling with frustration, she snapped, “Do I ask you for every detail of your private dealings? No. Why can’t you draw a line? I draw plenty for you!”
He stepped close enough that she could see the fine silk threading of each button on his jacket. “Let’s not beat around the bush, Evelyn. You want me to admit I’m jealous? Fine, I will. There’s a man I don’t know in your apartment right now, only a few feet away from your bed. Don’t pretend this is all right. Not when you crashed a benefit just this week because the thought of another woman accompanying me was enough to get you to interfere.”
He was right. Jealousy was a new emotion that wasn’t sitting too well with her. No matter how much she wanted to throw his accusation in his face, declaring she’d never stoop so low, she couldn’t. The idea of him dancing with someone else, dating someone else, was simply disgusting to her. She had no idea she owned such possessive tendencies, but when it came to Lucian Patras, he was hers.
Part of her liked that he was equally possessive, but at times like this it was a huge inconvenience. Before she could come up with another excuse, his fingers brushed against her cheek and he whispered, “There’s nothing you could confide in me that would make me stop loving you, Evelyn. I trust you. It isn’t that I think you’re having an affair, it’s that there’s a man in your apartment and you won’t tell me why. I don’t know him. How am I supposed to trust a stranger in such a setting with the woman I love when I know nothing of his purpose? Confide in me. Let me in. I promise not to interfere, just . . . let me know what’s going on.”
All of her life she’d studied people from afar, assuming she could predict the most logical reaction to an event, but there was something completely illogical about knowing someone up close and personal the way she knew Lucian. It frightened her, how often he’d surprised her. There was nothing predictable about him.
Their relationship had taken a severe detour over the last month, but this was not the man she left behind. This was someone sensible and understanding, someone who needed her reassurance as much as she needed his. He didn’t compute with the arrogant man she’d met last year. And while she liked it, she didn’t know if she could trust this open side of him.
Shades of truth played in his eyes, begging her to trust in him. That look telling her all he wanted was to know she was safe. It was as if he needed the assurance as much as breath.
Last night he arrived in a mood she was sure would lead to a fight. Something in the tone of his voice had transformed the energy into something sexual. But he’d blown her away with his gentle possession of her body. He was still Lucian, but there was something more there, something that fascinated her and made her want to lean into that illusion of security. Was it an illusion?
Taking a huge chance, she let out a long breath and pushed open the door. “Come on.”
Opening the door, she led him inside. Slowly marching up the stairs, he followed. He wasn’t the creeping giant she once feared. He was her friend. She’d been so afraid of exposing her flaws to his perfection, but with every step she acknowledged just how ungrounded her worries had been. When she reached the top step, Jason turned.
The man’s face showed surprise that they were not alone. “Hello,” he greeted politely. Jason was easy to talk to and she liked that about him. That was why she hired him.
Lucian stood, a tower of authority to her left. “Good afternoon.”
“Lucian Patras, this is Jason Dodd. He’s helping me get my GED”
The expression on Lucian’s face was one of utter surprise. Whatever he’d expected her to say, it wasn’t that. Jason stood and extended his hand.
“Wow, I’ve heard of you. How do you do?”
It was uncharacteristic, how taken off guard Lucian was. His shock registered in every motion, from the slow progress of his handshake to the way he glanced back at her and blinked. Strangely, there was a hint of regret in the now-soft set of his eyes. Perhaps the reminder of how uneducated she truly was had become too much for him to bear.
“Now you know,” she muttered.
Her eyes went to the primary worksheets and handwriting lessons scattered about. Lucian slowly approached the table and picked up a sheet. It was a simple vocabulary page that had taken her several minutes to work through.
Lucian cleared his throat. “Jason, would you mind giving us a minute?”
Her tutor glanced at her then back to Lucian. “Uh, yeah, you know, I think I left a book in my car.” He found his way down the stairs, and the door quietly shut behind him.
Lucian’s thumb and forefinger rubbed over the thick paper with a childlike illustration on the top beneath the directions. “You’re getting your diploma?”
Her lips pursed. “Eventually. I heard it takes fifteen hours a week. I’m a little behind, but I know basic math and once I get a handle on reading, I think I can do it.”
“I have no doubt,” he agreed in a voice laden with emotion. Was it shame? Pride? She couldn’t guess what was going through his head.
“You probably get why I didn’t want anyone to know.”
His gaze snapped to hers and his eyes narrowed. “Let’s get one thing straight, Evelyn. The only thing I feel in regards to your initiative to educate yourself is esteem. There’s no question in my mind you’ll achieve your goal.”
She hadn’t realized how afraid of his reaction she was until the tension rushed from her shoulders as a near sob of relief shook her frame. “Thank you.”
His fingers traced her jaw and tipped her face up. “Hey, you’re one of the strongest women I know. Not everything is measured in reading, writing, and arithmetic. You will do this. I have no doubt.”
His confidence left her breathless. Yes, he was her friend.
“Can I ask something of you?”
She blinked, not understanding the sheen of tears suddenly blurring her vision. “Yes.”
“I know your first instinct will be to say no, but think about it. Don’t give me your answer for a few days, until you’ve truly considered my request.”
Emotion was pushed aside for practicality. Who knew what he was about to ask? “Okay.”
“The money, the thirty-five thousand, it’s for your education. Let me pay for it, Evelyn. Let me give you that one thing, not because you asked, but because I want to be the one person who gave you something you truly wanted and truly deserve.”
She took a deep breath. “I’ll think about it.”
He nodded, apparently content with her consideration. “Good enough.” Placing a kiss on her cheek he asked, “What time is your lesson over?”
“Ten.”
“Will you stay with me tonight?”
At that moment she was so attracted to him—not because he offered her a free and clear education, but because he accepted her as she was and still desired her all the same—there was no way she could turn down such an offer. “Yes.”
“I’ll have Dugan pick you up at ten fifteen.”
“Okay.”
He smiled. “You know, sometimes I don’t always do the right thing. I’m sorry my curiosity got the better of me. A part of me wishes I would’ve waited until you were ready to confide in me, but then a selfish part of me is glad that I know what’s going on and that I don’t need to beat up this Jason fellow.”
She chuckled, knowing he was kidding. “Are you really okay with this? I know it’s weird. I’m just trying to be a normal person—”
“Hey, I am beyond okay. I’m so damn proud of you it’s . . . I don’t know what. I never felt like this before. Sure, it would’ve been nice if your tutor was a woman so I didn’t have to worry about him peeking down your shirt, but I’m beyond happy that this is what you’re investing in. You. It’s about time somebody did.”
Something soft and gushy and entirely girly bloomed inside of her. Without thinking, she propelled herself at him, wrapping her arms around his broad shoulders and squeezing with all her might. They were always so controlled around each other until that jolting moment when the sexual tension became too much. This was different. This was unprecedented. This was the first time in her life she felt no shame for being exactly who she was, because in his eyes, no matter what, she was beautiful.
***
Evelyn awoke after a long bout of lovemaking and crept through the dark condo to find Lucian exactly where she knew he would be. His expression softened the minute he noticed her, his arm lifting invitingly.
She climbed onto his lap and rested her head on his bare shoulder as those strong arms closed around her. Breathing in his familiar scent, she realized, like the scent of burning leaves or the scent of the cots at the shelter, his rich musk now held a very special nostalgic place in her heart.
He always smelled so fresh and good. Her mother, when she was clean, had a stronger scent that wasn’t unpleasant, just . . . different. Pearl often smelled of cold weather, briny and sort of metallic, like winter. Parker smelled like most boys. Evelyn wondered what she smelled like.
Pressing her nose into Lucian’s throat, she inhaled deeply. Lovely.
His hand coasted over her tangled hair. “I miss you being here all the time.”
She missed him too. It was a difficult predicament. Part of her demanded this physical space between them, but another part longed for the convenience of always having him near. Her independence was something she longed for. She’d always had it, but this time it was different. It was on her terms, not based on uncontrollable circumstance. She wanted to hold on to that hard-earned freedom with both hands.
She wasn’t sure when she’d be satisfied, but expected one day she’d be comfortable enough to let it all go and surrender to the currents of life. The tides had changed. She no longer had the sense of drowning.
Her exhaustion was welcome. It was one that followed a hard day’s work and too much thinking over written words and elementary math equations. It was a good sort of tired, nothing like the unending hunger that came with her previous nomadic existence. Yet it was all so new, and that was why she had trouble trusting its perpetuity.
“I know. I miss it too.”
“Will you ever come back to me?”
She loved these moments tucked away in the shadows of the night. It was their confessional, where eyes needn’t meet and secrets could be told. “Yes. When I’m ready.”
Warm lips pressed into her temple. “How often will you see Jason?”
“As often as he can manage. I have years and years of missing out to make up for. I want to learn as fast as my brain can manage.”
“Don’t burn yourself out.”
“I don’t understand that concept.”
“I know you don’t. You’re like the little engine that could. Quitting’s a foreign term to you.”
“It’s grueling,” she admitted.
“What is? Never letting yourself give up?”
“Yes. There were times I thought about not moving. About just giving over to the frigid lock on my bones and the hollow feeling in my belly. There were days it was simply impossible to move my fingers, all my energy going into shivering uncontrollably, where my hunger became an emotion I couldn’t contain. But I always forced myself to find food and something to keep that fire burning.”
“I can’t fathom that sort of existence. It’s so far from the privilege I’ve known. It’s a wonder we found each other.”
Yes. It was. “Do you know . . . out of all those freezing winters and hungry nights, the emptiness I felt when we were apart put those aches to shame.”
He stilled, even the breath in his chest coming to a halt. “I’ll never regret anything as much as those days apart. I was a fool and I’m so sorry I did that to both of us.”
Her lashes lowered and she found comfort again in his scent. It was the affirmation that she needed, telling her he was truly there. So many nights she’d tried to conjure his scent, searching for it in items he’d left behind, but it didn’t exist. “I don’t think I’d go if you asked me to leave again.”
“There are lots of things I wish to ask you again. Leaving’s not one of them.”
He was referring to marriage. No matter how much their time apart taught her how she needed him in her life, marriage was still something she wasn’t ready for. Oddly, they fit each other. While some might assume debutantes of high society would be better suited for a man of Lucian’s stature, they were wrong. Something inside of her—some very stingy part—knew he was made for her and she was made for him. But the time to confirm such feelings was not now.
She wondered if she’d ever reach a point that she could agree to such commitment without a thread of uncertainty. When she’d met Lucian, she’d assumed intimate relationships were as black and white as anything else. She couldn’t have been more wrong.
Love was like piloting a jet through a mountain range, blind. It was freeing and exhilarating, but at the same time, at any second the person risking their life piloting that plane could crash and burn, shattering into nothing but dust—all for one glorious ride.
When the sun came up they ordered breakfast. Her body was tired from many hours of lovemaking and not enough hours of sleep. She savored every bite of her delicious scrambled eggs. Raphael, the chef at the hotel, must have known it was for her. He slipped in a small triangle of French toast generously dusted with powdered sugar beneath a dollop of homemade cream. A strawberry, carved into a starburst, perched at its side.
She ate until her belly could hold no more, and then it was time to leave. “Will I see you tonight?” Lucian asked as he made a production of kissing her good-bye.
“Jason’s coming at three, but tomorrow I have off.”
He growled and nibbled her lip, his fingers slipping beneath the waist of her wool pants. “I feel myself coming down with something. Perhaps I better tell Seth to reschedule my appointments.”
“You do feel warm. Hot even.”
His mouth trailed down her throat as he cupped her ass. The flesh of her nipples tightened and she moaned softly, wishing she could stay. His lips found hers. It was a kiss filled with dark promises. She groaned as her sex twitched, asking for more. “I can’t be late. I don’t feel like getting called into the office for a lecture.”
He drew back. “Did you have to go to the office yesterday?”
“No, but I wasn’t late.”
“Don’t let that manager of yours take advantage. I want to know if he treats you any differently than the other employees.”
She rolled her eyes. Even little old Clemons was not out of the Patras jurisdiction, apparently. He smacked her ass.
“Don’t give me that look. I’m serious.”
“Okay,” she said with little conviction.
His phone rang and he glanced at the screen before answering. “She’s on her way down now.” He hung up and kissed her one last time. “Your chariot awaits.”
***
Evelyn pushed aside her worksheet when customers began loading groceries on her belt. “Hi, how are you today?”
The older woman strategically grouped her refrigerated items and boxed non-perishables and mumbled some form of reply. The rhythmic beep, beep, beep of the scanner filled the silence as items tallied on her register. She efficiently bagged the objects and when the order was complete, Evelyn instructed the woman to slide her card. Not everyone was having a bright and cheery day here at Clemons Market.
The next few customers were a little more pleasant. In between orders, Evelyn returned to her studies. Today she was working on combination vowels like in the words boat, coat, and oat. It wasn’t rocket science, but she was immensely proud of herself.
Jason was a patient teacher. Being the only qualified instructor she ever sat down with, she noticed an impressive difference in how her mind was beginning to process the squiggly lines, putting sounds to letters, and grouping sounds to form words. He encouraged her when quitting was tempting and he never let her get overly frustrated.
Much of the process of learning to read was frustrating. Directions were difficult. Luckily, Nick knew her secret and he was always a register away if she had any questions.
Mr. Gearhart had been MIA for the last few days. That made sneaking in her studies between customers a bit easier. Anyone who saw what she was working on would clearly know she wasn’t as educated as she should be. She’d gotten in the habit of putting her dictionary over the juvenile illustrations of tugboats, puppies, and sand pails. By next week she’d be on the second grade workbook and she hoped the pictures would be a bit less infantile. Getting rid of the baby format was just another motivator in her long journey.
A young woman stepped into her aisle and began unloading items. Evelyn pushed her paper aside and scanned the tub of coffee. “Hi, how are you today?”
The girl had auburn hair and an easy smile. She looked about twenty-five. “I’m good. How are you?”
“Good, thanks. Do you have any coupons?”
“No.”
Evelyn continued to scan and bag the order while the woman waited. The customer glanced at the register area as she played with her cell phone. “Do you have a child?” she asked, motioning to the phonics sheet.
Heat tickled the back of Evelyn’s neck. Hiding her discomfort, she turned and bagged three boxes of cereal. “Um . . .” Should she lie? It was only a customer. “Yes.”
“How old?”
How old was a first grader? “Six.”
“Boy or girl?”
What was this woman writing a book? “Girl.”
“That’s nice. What’s her name?”
Sometimes Evelyn preferred the grumpy, quiet customers. “Pearl,” she said the first name that popped in her head.
The girl’s manicured brow rose as if Pearl was an inappropriate name for a little girl. Evelyn lifted the filled bags onto the metal apron of the checkout. The girl pushed her cart forward and loaded the sacks of food. She returned to the card device and continued to play on her phone as she processed the rest of the order.
There was a quiet snick and crunch sound that caught Evelyn’s attention. She didn’t recognize the sound. When she heard it again she turned and blinked at the tiny white flash of light. Snick-crunch, snick-crunch, snick-crunch.
The girl appeared to be dialing something, maybe playing a game or texting—Evelyn stilled. “Are you taking my picture?” Indignation tightened her brow.
The customer had the good grace to blush and lower her phone. She quickly slid her card. “It says wait for the cashier.”
Evelyn’s jaw dropped as she stared at the girl and her phone. She repeated herself, “Did you take my picture?”
The customer’s mouth opened to form a reply, but said nothing. Her lips curved in something of a satisfied smile and she suddenly said, “You know, I don’t need any of this stuff after all.”
Dodging the cart full of groceries she tucked her phone away and turned to flee the store. What the hell?
“Hey!” Evelyn called. She abandoned her register and caught up to the girl at the automatic doors just before the chain of shopping carts. Her fingers curled around the girl’s sleeve. “Why did you take my picture? What about your groceries?”
She smirked and Evelyn’s blood ran cold. “Thanks for the interview.” She tugged away and bolted into the parking lot.
Fucking paparazzi!
Evelyn’s knees tightened as she thought to chase after her.
“Evelyn.” She stilled at the sharp tone in Mr. Gerhard’s voice. Gritting her teeth, she turned to her waxy-faced boss. “What’s going on?” he asked.
Speechless, she fumbled for an explanation. That woman had stolen pictures of her and—oh God, what had she told her?
“My office. Now.” Her manager turned and stalked to the back of the store.
Anger boiled up inside her chest. She marched back to her register and flicked off her light.
“What the hell was that?” Nick asked as he sent a customer on their way.
Hands trembling with outrage, she snapped, “That woman took pictures of me and left all her crap here!”
“Pictures? For what?”
She grabbed the stack of tabloids she’d collected over the week. Inky words mocked her and surrounded pictures of Lucian and his limo. Slamming them on the belt of Nick’s register, she gritted her teeth. “She was a reporter.”
He glanced down at the newspapers and cursed.
“Evelyn, please come to the back.” The intercom interrupted the cheery music filling the store and her stomach seemed to bottom out. Now she needed to deal with this.
She pressed the Process button on her register. The woman had slid a card, and Evelyn wanted a name. Steering the cart out of the way, she trudged back to Mr. Gerhard’s office like she was visiting the gallows.
Her heart clattered in her chest as her knuckles grazed the door.
“Come in.”
Her steps grew heavy as she pressed into the office. The floor, where she forced her gaze, was dusty. A crumpled receipt sat in the shadows beneath his wooden desk. She waited for him to speak. The words you’re fired, rang like a taunt in her head.
“Mind telling me what just happened?”
She shrugged.
“First I see you leave your register. Then I see you accost a customer. This is unacceptable.” When she said nothing, he said, “Shut the door and have a seat.”
Keeping her breathing steady, she pressed the door the remainder of the way closed and slowly paced to the chair across from his desk. Dropping into the seat, she kept her gaze down.
“You’re going to have to explain your actions.”
Her eyes closed and she sighed. “That customer was taking my picture, and then she said she didn’t need her groceries and left.”
“And you thought the right thing to do was chase after her and grab her? We could have a lawsuit.”
She glared at him. “She was taking photos of me!”
“That’s no excuse for your actions.” He sighed and leaned back in his chair, his fingers tapping his manicured mustache. He appraised her for some time then announced, “I’m changing your shift. I think you’d be better suited for evenings.”
Her breath froze like tiny vines of ice in her lungs. If she worked nights, she wouldn’t be able to continue her lessons. “I can’t do nights.”
“You’re still in the preliminary stage of employment. You need to be flexible if you intend to become a permanent employee.”
She didn’t want the evening shift. That meant walking home after dark. Less time with Lucian. No more working with Nick. And worst of all, no time to get tutored. All forms of pride took a backseat as she blinked back tears. “Please, Mr. Gerhard. My schedule works for me the way it is. I don’t want it to change.”
“I think you’d be better under Monica’s supervision.”
“Monica?”
“The evening store manager.”
Her mind ticked over solutions rapidly as she tried to figure out a reasonable argument. Maybe she should go back to her housekeeping job at Patras. Maybe she could talk to someone above Mr. Gerhard. She hadn’t even earned her first paycheck yet, and she had the sinking suspicion there wouldn’t be another.
She stood. “I’m sorry you feel that way. My schedule doesn’t allow for me to work a night shift. I’m afraid if you insist on changing it I’ll have to put in my resignation.”
His brows shot up from behind his coke-bottle glasses. “Now, I didn’t say you had to leave.”
Maybe this was for the best. Lucian offered to pay for her tutoring and the more she considered his offer the more grateful she became. Over the past week things had changed. She was seeing more and more reasons to trust that he wasn’t going to abandon her. A very romantic part of her believed, wholeheartedly, he’d always be there. She could figure something out. She was a survivor.
As she thought of possible solutions, she realized her manager was still talking. “. . . Now, I’m sure we could come to some agreement. What do you say we discuss this more over lunch? It is completely your choice however.”
As she caught his suggestion, a frown pinched her face. That slimy feeling returned, the one she usually got in Mr. Gerhard’s office. Why was she back here more than anyone else? His smile was patronizing beneath the mop of his mustache, and his eyes were hooded and magnified behind those thick lenses.
Deep down, she knew he was crossing a line, and she knew if Lucian found out he’d kill her manager. More complications she didn’t want to deal with.
The scent of peppermint and coffee was suddenly suffocating. Her gaze slipped over the washed-out grease stain on the breast pocket of his pink Clemons shirt just beneath the narcissistic name tag proclaiming he was something better than the rest of them.
“I’m trying to be your friend here, Evelyn.”
Her gaze flashed to his and something inside of her snapped. “No, you’re not. You’re trying to manipulate me. You’ve asked me to lunch over and over again and I’ve continually made it clear that I’m not interested. Have you ever asked Nick or Gary or Todd to lunch? No. And I imagine it has a lot more to do with their lack of breasts than their job performance.”
She was really doing this. Her fingers went to her name tag and snatched it off her shirt. “That woman violated my privacy. Rather than sympathize with your employee, you used the opportunity to further your creepy advances. I’m. Not. Interested. I quit.”
She tossed the name tag on his desk and exited the office. When she reached her register, she was trembling. Her fingers clumsily collected her papers and books and shoved them into her bag.
“Hey, you all right?”
“Do me a favor,” she said as she slung her bag over her shoulder. “Make sure they get my address to mail me my check. I quit.”
“What? Why?”
“Because that waxy motherfucker asks me out nearly every day, and he just tried to change my shift. He’s always leering at me and brushing up against me and I can’t take it anymore.”
“You need to tell someone if he’s harassing you.”
“I’ll be sure to write a letter to management,” she snarled, needing to take a jab at herself in that moment for some unknown reason. “I am so sick and tired of being treated like a piece of flesh. Goddamn it! What does a girl have to do, not to be some sort of object in this world? People are writing about my personal business! Taking pictures of me at work! I just want to blend in! That’s all I’ve ever wanted! To blend the fuck in.”
Nick was suddenly at her side, ushering her away from the registers and into a quiet corner behind a juice display. “Hey, hey. Calm down.”
Her breath quaked and to her horror, drops of tears fell from her cheeks, blooming into dark, rosy puddles on her pink shirt. She only wanted a normal job with a normal boss and a normal life. Why could nothing ever be normal?
She’d gone from the gutters to an ivory tower to what she finally hoped was average, and now, because of her stubborn temper, she had nothing.
The heel of her palm scrubbed away her stupid tears and she shrugged off Nick’s touch. It was only meant to comfort, but at the moment she didn’t want the weight on her skin.
“Gerhard’s a jerk. I see the way he watches you. Seriously, Ev, you can complain to management.”
More attention she didn’t want.
Pulling herself together, she shifted and sniffled in a deep breath. “No. This isn’t where I want to be anyway. No offense. I just . . . I’ll figure it out.”
“But I like you working here,” he admitted. “We have fun.”
They did have fun. It was nothing tangible, but Nick made her laugh and helped speed along the hours. Something inside her told her this might be the end of their . . . friendship. The word settled in her head like a battleship trying to parallel park in a shoebox. He was her friend.
He didn’t want anything from her. Theirs was a mutual respect for silly jokes and meaningless chatter. She never had that before. With Parker, there had always been an underlying sense of struggle, a weight that siphoned away all those free opportunities to simply be.
Her relationship with Pearl was work. When had it become so much work to have a mother? Perhaps it had always been that way. No, there was a time when Evelyn was merely a child expected to sit and have her hair braided by her mother’s fingers and go to bed in her mother’s arms. Those days seemed lost, worlds away.
Then there was Lucian. He made her laugh. He made her smile. He made her do a lot of other things that were fun. Every other face from her existence paled in comparison to his. Her emotions calmed at the mere thought of him.
She grinned at Nick. “I really liked working with you too, Nick. Maybe in a few weeks we can get together and hang out. Grab lunch or something.”
Her friend smiled sadly. “That would be cool. I can introduce you to my new girlfriend and maybe you can bring your bazillionaire.”
She laughed. “Maybe.” Would her life ever be ordinary with a man like Lucian in it?
They hugged and said good-bye. She felt marginally guilty for leaving the cart of food for the others to put away, but she was done. Another job, another chapter in the life of Evelyn Scout Keats.