I was done waiting to go see Hannah. I took the weekend, including Friday, off work so I could get as much time with her as possible. Hannah knew I was coming since Steve kept me up to date on what she was doing. From everything he said, she wasn’t doing anything crazy, she stayed close to Sierra when the guys couldn’t be around her. She hadn’t agreed to any more dates or even made friends with any guys.
I was so happy to see my sister that I didn’t care what we did. I would have been perfectly content hanging out in her room all weekend. She had other plans because she said I needed to get a feel for college living. Thankfully, that meant eating at her favorite pizza place, the Pizza Mill, and hitting the bookstore so I could get Western State gear to wear to the game. The Pizza Mill clearly deserved its title as the favorite. I would quickly gain 20lbs if I lived here and it would all be due to the pizza. It was a given that Steve and Sierra would go with us but there was no sign of Curtis Friday night.
Saturday was the craziest thing I had ever seen. Starting with the tailgating, which was fun all on its own. Hannah introduced me to Alfred and Norma and they instantly felt like the grandparents we never had. Hannah got busy helping Norma, which left me alone with Sierra because Steve was busy helping Alfred while Curtis was busy visiting with his friends. She wasn’t nearly as shy as I had her pegged for. She had a disposition that was different than most of the ladies I normally hang out with. Not counting Hannah, or wait even counting Hannah, because it was apparent quickly that Sierra may be sheltered but not nearly to the level we have sheltered Hannah.
After hanging out with Sierra while tailgating, I found myself looking for her throughout the remainder of the day. The game was fun to experience but really it was more fun watching Sierra have fun. Steve let me know I was welcome to crash at their room, but I didn’t want to give up my time with Hannah and Sierra.
Steve hung out with us at the girls’ room until well past midnight. He and I talked privately while the girls got ready for bed. I told him I was taking Hannah out tomorrow before heading home. He asked if he could see me privately before I took off then requested that I not let Hannah know. Instantly, my guard was up; why did he want to talk to me? It was like a ton of bricks hitting me at once. He likes my sister. He put himself into the role of protecting her since we aren’t here and now he fucking likes her. What the hell am I supposed to do about it. I can’t just drop everything back home and move here.
Hannah and Sierra walked back into the room wearing far too little clothing. I quickly ushered Steve out and would have liked to kick my sister out as well. Hell yeah! Sierra wore skimpy sleep shorts and a tank top. I knew she had a smoking hot body beneath the clothes she wore. But seeing it in person was more than I had previously thought. Seriously looking at her now I was automatically updating my spank bank files. If I didn’t figure she would slap me, I would ask her to turn around and maybe bend over. Damn my dick was getting hard.
I quickly made a bed up on the floor. It was far from comfortable, but being this close to Sierra made it totally worth it. Maybe she would get up in the night and forget that I was here; trip and fall landing herself pussy first on my dick. Chances are slim. But I can picture it in my mind. Before I could even get my t-shirt and jeans off I could hear Hannah snoring. I couldn’t help but laugh then ask Sierra, “How can you sleep with her snoring like that?”
“She only snores like that when she is really tired. The last two days have been busier than we are used to. Plus, if I am honest, I snore too so it’s not like I can complain. The fact that we both snore makes us quick to try and fall asleep first.” She spoke quietly so she didn’t disturb my snoring sister. “What do you think of Western State? Are you okay with her being here?”
I took a minute to formulated my response because honestly, up until Steve asked to talk to me, I was totally good with her being here. “I love it here. I was prepared when we moved her here to hate everything about it but over the last couple of weeks I can see she is doing really well. This weekend I thought I would see things that would make me want to drag her back home with me. I am not going to lie, I am nervous about the possibility of her and Steve hooking up. She has never been allowed to spend time with guys let alone date them.”
She didn’t respond by being offended which made me respect her a little more than I already did. I don’t know if I could be objective enough to hear someone say the idea of my sibling dating theirs made them nervous and not be offended by it. “I hear what you are saying. It isn’t my story to tell but I know my brother is the most loyal person I have ever known. That being said, he is also the most respectful person I have ever known. Trust me when I tell you I wouldn’t just say that, because I certainly don’t say it about Curtis. If my brother wants to date Hannah, she couldn’t find a better man to be with. Again, I am not just saying that because he is my brother.”
“Wow, I didn’t think I would ever find someone who spoke as highly of their sibling as I do. Sometimes it makes me feel bad knowing that Hannah is so perfect. At least I can be consoled with the fact that Kyler isn’t perfect too.” It was hard to keep the emotion out of my voice. I certainly didn’t think the conversation would turn in this direction. Wow, I hadn’t voiced my feelings of inadequacy in years despite them being there all the time.
“I certainly wouldn’t want to tell you what to think or feel. But I can tell you a few quotes that help me. ‘I’m stronger because I had to be, I’m smarter because of my mistakes, happier because of the sadness I’ve known, and now wiser because I learned.’ my other favorite is ‘you were born to be real, not to be perfect’ I gave up a long fucking time ago comparing myself to anyone else. We are always more forgiving to others than we are to ourselves. We all have that voice inside our head, some of us are just better at turning the volume down.” She pauses as if she got lost in her thoughts before she said, “Running. It is the only thing that helps me control the volume.”
Fuck she was cutting me wide open. Hannah had mentioned that they lost their parents which just kills me. Now to hear the quotes she tells herself, it’s like she just opened a window for me to see into her thoughts and feelings. It is more than any other person has ever done for me, even more than Hannah. It makes me want to take her in my arms and tell her over and over again that she is perfect just the way she is. I mean, looking at her, she is fucking perfect. But learning about what is on the inside makes her even more perfect. What do I say that won’t cheapen our exchange? “Thank you. Hannah really is my best friend and she would do anything for me or anyone she loves. I think I have worried for so long that if we didn’t shelter her, she wouldn’t choose us. She wouldn’t need us. Seeing her in her new world this weekend, I see that she is still my best friend; she is still the girl I grew up with. Giving her freedom hasn’t changed her, she still has the same beliefs and values. She is still my little sister. Selfishly, that makes me happy.”
She laughed quietly. “That is totally normal. I know my grandpa didn’t give the guys a choice, he kicked their asses out and made them go to college. He wouldn’t let them have a car because he was afraid they would drive home every weekend to see me or protect me. At first I was pissed at Grandpa; then I was scared they would go off to college, meet new friends, and forget about me. To this day, I don’t think either of my brothers have any idea what I went through during my senior year. Grandpa was sick and fucking stubborn and it was so hard to take care of him by myself.” I could hear the wavering in her voice before the tears took over. Normally I hate it when people cry. Seriously, ask Hannah, I will do anything to avoid having her cry. I’ve made plenty of Dairy Queen runs simply to avoid having to deal with tears. This was different, hearing Sierra cry was killing me. I got up on my knees then made my way to her bedside. I brushed her hair away from her face so I could look in her eyes. With my hand on the back of her head I pulled, awkwardly I might add, until I had her face squished into my bare chest. Through the tears she started to giggle and pulled away; she climbed out of her bed and grabbed tissue from the desk across the room. Fuck me, her little sleep shorts rode up the crack of her perfect ass and she did nothing to fix the situation. Damn I just wanted to touch her and my dick was making it very obvious that he’d like to take part in it too.
She climbed back onto her bed sitting up sideways, she patted the bed beside her offering me a place to sit. “You can sit up here, I won’t cry anymore. Thank you for the hug, sorry if I got snot on you. That isn’t why I was giggling. It reminded me of when I was little and my dad would make be blow my nose using his hanky that he always carried. I’d blow my nose real hard then try and hand the hanky back to him but he’d never take it.”
She rested her head on my shoulder and within minutes she started snoring just like my sister. Crazy thing is, I actually liked having her head on my shoulder. The feeling running through my body is nothing like what happened the first day I met her, when my knees almost gave out. That was totally a sexual zap running through my body. This is a peacefulness running through my body. This is the most comforting feeling I have ever experienced. I sat there quietly for about twenty minutes before reality hit; the volume of the voice in my head was down. I eased her into her bed and no sooner did I let go of her body than the volume was turned back up. It took another half hour before I was finally able to switch everything off and sleep.