Monroe
Squirting sanitizer on my hands, I plaster on my best smile and pray I don’t have animal feces visible on my clothes. There’s a man standing at the edge of the drive talking to Tess. When I come around the corner, he looks up.
“You must be Monroe. I’m Jerry.”
I take his offered hand for a quick shake. “It’s nice to meet you, Jerry. What can I do for you? Are you looking to adopt a dog, because I’ve got several ready for a forever home?”
The pudgy man shakes his head. “Oh, no, quite the opposite.” He takes a step back and turns for his car. “I’m here to drop one off.” Jerry opens his back door and pulls out a large bird cage with a blanket draped over the top. “My father passed away a few weeks ago and left me his bird.”
“I’m so sorry to hear about your father.”
“I appreciate that. It was expected so we were as prepared as we could be.”
I smile and nod, unsure of how to respond. “Are you here because you need to learn more about caring for your bird? I’ve got some great reference books you could borrow.”
“No, you don’t understand. I don’t want the bird.”
My eyes widen. “You don’t?”
“My father was crazy and his bird is even crazier. Quite frankly, I don’t have the time or patience to deal with the darn thing. I was told you take animals.”
“Well, yes, but—”
“Perfect.” Jerry sets the cage at my feet and grabs a giant bag out of the back of his car. “Here’s all of his stuff—food, toys, and I tossed in a picture of my dad.”
“Why would I need a picture of your dad?”
“I don’t know, I just thought he might like looking at it from time to time.”
“Oh, okay, so—”
“So that’s it,” he interrupts. “That’s everything.”
Before I have a chance to respond, Jerry hops in his car and peels out tossing up a cloud of dust.
Tess fans her hand in front of her face. “Does this happen often?”
“No. Most people drop their pet off after hours in a box on the front step.”
She looks at the cage hidden under a white blanket. “Well, let’s find out what’s in there.”
I pick up the cage and carry it into Animal Haven.
Tess lifts the hem of the blanket over the top of the cage, and we come face to face with the most gorgeous bird I have ever seen.
“It’s a cockatoo,” I breathe, leaning down to get a better look.
The bird is all white with a black beak, and obviously doesn’t like my close proximity because he squawks, erects the lemon colored crest on top of his head, and fluffs his feathers.
“I don’t think he likes us,” Tess says.
“He’s just scared.”
“What do we do with him? I’ve never cared for a bird.”
“I’m not entirely sure. I’ll call the vet to see if he can stop by and check the bird out. Maybe he can give us some tips.”
“It sounds like you’ve got a solid plan. Is there anything you need me to do for you, or should I get back to what I was doing?”
“I’m good.”
Tess heads out back to finish up whatever she was doing. I grab the bag Jerry dropped off and pull out a container of food, two toys, and a picture of an old man who looks nothing like Jerry.
“Well, I don’t know your name, but I know what your owner looked like,” I mumble, staring into the now empty bag.
“Dave,” he says.
The loud, screeching voice startles me. With a hand to my chest, I jump back and look at the bird. “You can talk?”
“Dave,” he repeats.
“Is that your name?”
“That’s my name, don’t wear it out.” His words are mumbled because, well, he’s a bird, but I can still make out what he’s saying.
“What else do you know? How old are you Dave?”
“That’s my name, don’t wear it out.”
“Yes, I know that. How old are you?” I ask again.
“Shut up!” he yells.
“Excuse me?” Hands on my hips, I glare at Dave. He tilts his head to the side, starts laughing, and I’ll be damned if it isn’t the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.
“Shut up, Dave,” he yells, bouncing on his perch in the cage. “Go to sleep, Dave.”
“You want to take a nap? Now we’re getting somewhere.” I lower the blanket over the cage. “There.”
“It’s dark in here.”
I peek under the blanket. “It’s supposed to be dark, you’re taking a nap.”
“Shut up!”
I drop the blanket. There are a lot of things I’m willing to do in this job, but arguing with a cheeky cockatoo is not one of them.
“It’s dark in here.”
This is going to get annoying fast. “Goodnight, Dave.”
“Goodnight, Dave,” he says.
Dave sighs and doesn’t make another sound.
“Just what I need,” I mumble, walking out of the room.
I call the vet and leave a message to see if he can stop by to give Dave a checkup. Unfortunately, I’ll have to keep Dave separated from the other animals until I get a clean bill of health from the vet.
Ruby bumps into my leg on her way to her water bowl and I reach down to pet her head. “You should probably stick with me today, girl. I’m not sure you’re ready for the likes of Dave.”
The next few hours fly by as I finish up the chores that Jerry interrupted. When I return to the office to check on Dave, I find him sitting on Tess’s shoulder. She’s thumbing through a book and he is looking over her shoulder as if he’s interested in what she’s reading.
“I take it you and Dave have become friends.”
Tess and Dave look up and then she frowns at the bird. “You told me your name was Simon.”
“That’s my name, don’t wear it out,” he says, bobbing his head.
“I’m starting to think the bird doesn’t know what he’s talking about,” I say.
“I’m not so sure about that. I’ve been doing some research and cockatoos are incredibly smart,” Tess says, raising a reference book she likely got from the book shelf in the office.
I pull out a chair and sit down. “What else did you learn?”
“Well, they like Kale, broccoli, carrots, sweet potato, and squash.”
“Ew,” Dave—or Simon—squawks.
Tess laughs and continues. “They also eat fruit in moderation, and should always avoid chocolate, avocado, caffeine, dried beans, pretzels, and alcohol.”
“Grab me a beer!”
“Sorry, Dave, I only have Tequila,” I reply.
“Simon says, shut up!”
My mouth drops open and Tess chuckles. “He’s funny, isn’t he?” she asks, clearly smitten with the bird.
“Sure, if you like being lied to and told to shut up.”
Tess reaches up and pets the bird. He pecks at her hand with is beak and she yanks it back. “I think he’s cute. If you don’t have anyone else in mind, I’d love to foster him.”
“What? Really? You don’t know anything about birds.”
“I can learn.”
“Are you sure you want to?”
“Why not? I’ve got nothing else going for me. Simon can keep me company.”
I rest my hand on hers. “You’ve got lots going for you.”
She rolls her eyes. “Yes or no, Mo. Can I foster Simon?”
“Simon says, yes,” the bird yells.
Tess smiles. “See, Simon says. You have to do what Simon says.”
“Fine, but we have to get him checked out by the vet first.”
“Speaking of the vet, he called why you were out back. He can’t stop by, his schedule is too packed, but he’d be happy to squeeze us in if we can bring the bird to him.”
“Oh, okay.” I look around, unsure of when I’ll have time to take him.
“I’ll take him,” Tess offers. “And then if everything turns out okay, I’ll just bring him home with me. We’ll even stop by the pet store on the way and grab a few more things.”
I don’t think I’ve ever seen Tess this excited, and who am I tell her no? “Fine. If you’re sure.”
“Did you hear that, Simon?” she asks. “You get to come home with me.”
“Shut up!”