Six days until the marathon.

I woke up early to do a short run, and then made my way home to do a little yoga before I went into work. When I got to my building, there was a folded piece of paper tucked under a rock on the bottom step.

On the next step was another note.

I laughed as a tear dropped down on the pieces of paper. God did I miss him.

I picked up the next paper.

I went into my apartment and put his notes in a drawer. Then I did my yoga as planned.

Knowing he was thinking about me and wanted to be forgiven was enough for today. My focus was the marathon and nothing else. That was an exaggeration, of course. Charlie was a constant on my mind. But I didn’t have the mental energy to spare this week. I had to be selfish and focus on my goal.

Five days until the marathon. Two days without Charlie.

When I got home from my short run, waiting for me on the bottom step was a smoothie from my favorite smoothie place, with a note underneath.

I took his note, tucked it in the drawer with the others, and drank my smoothie. He was winning my heart back one gesture at a time. No, that wasn’t right. He’d never lost my heart. My heart was a romantic fool who would follow Charlie anywhere. It was my faith and trust that had been damaged.

Four days until the marathon. Three days without Charlie.

Rachel was back from her honeymoon and it felt just a little warmer and much sunnier in the salon. I was dying to hear every last detail, but I had to wait all day until we could hit the wine bar after work.

The three of us cozied up in a booth near the back, and with sangria in hand and tapas on the table, Rachel told us about her trip.

“People thought we were crazy when I told them we were going to Croatia for our honeymoon,” Frannie raised her hand and Rachel laughed, “but I’m telling you, it’s ideal. I mean, there are beaches and castles. Can you get any more romantic? It’s like two or three Disney movies combined!”

“I saw the pictures you texted. I’m a believer!” I said.

“But the most important question: how’s married banging?” Frannie asked.

Rachel giggled. “So good! Like, I had no idea it could get better, but it does!” She leaned forward and said quietly, “And we decided to try ditching the birth control and go for it.”

Frannie gasped. “What? Babies?”

I rubbed my swelling heart. “I’m going to be an aunt?”

Rachel nodded. “Hopefully within the next year. Joe and I are getting old, so we gotta get this show on the road.” She sighed. “Can’t you just picture a little red-headed baby Joe toddling around?”

Frannie shook her head. “I can’t. I really can’t. You guys have to slow down. I just accepted the possibility of marriage, and now my Rach is going to be having babies? It’s too much!”

Rachel squeezed Frannie’s hand across the table. “Aw, Frananas. I’m not pregnant yet! Although, Joe’s sperm could have found my little egg by now…”

Frannie covered her ears. “No, no! I’m not ready for this!”

I laughed. “Just give her a day or two and she’ll be on board. I’m very excited. I call dibs on baby snuggles!”

Frannie lowered her hands. “I do love baby snuggles. You know when their tiny little fists grab your finger and you’re surprised by the strength of their grasp. Oh god, listen to me!”

Rachel pointed at her and laughed maniacally. “No one can resist the allure of chubby little babies!”

Frannie melted in her seat. “I’m powerless!”

“So, onto other things. What’s going on here?” Rachel gestured toward my head. “I mean, you look hot, but I was more than a little shocked when I walked into the salon this morning.”

I let Frannie catch Rachel up on everything because I was tired of even thinking about it.

“Oh, Charlie. Why?” Rachel looked physically pained. “Have you talked to him yet?”

I shook my head. “He’s been leaving me notes, and yesterday he left me a smoothie. He made up a word for how sorry he is because he said sorry doesn’t cut it. He’s trying.”

“That’s adorable. Are we still mad at him?” Frannie asked.

I heaved out a long sigh. “No, not really. More hurt and unsure.” I waved a hand around. “I don’t want to talk about it anymore! Let’s discuss how Frannie wants to marry James and love him forevah and evah!”

Thankfully, the spotlight was off me and we spent the rest of the time focused on Frannie.

When I got home, there was a small package waiting for me on the bottom step, along with a note. I took it up to my apartment and flopped down on the couch before opening it. Inside the package was a pair of pink running socks. I recognized the brand. My running socks were nice, but these were top of the line, the Rolls-Royce of socks.

I smiled for him then. He couldn’t see it, but he was the one who did it.

Charlie.

Three days until the marathon. Four days without Charlie.

Not seeing Charlie all week seemed like a smart, responsible idea at the time, so I could focus on training and make sure my mind was clear. But my training schedule was very light for the week. I actually wasn’t supposed to run at all for the next two days, and it was killing me, because I needed it. I was nothing if not a rule follower though, so I did an hour of yoga instead, which was only slightly cheating.

At work, I happened to look out the window at the exact time he was walking out of his shop. Our eyes met for the briefest moment, and my heart ached, so I looked away. If I couldn’t be with him, I didn’t want to see him.

I scrubbed the salon from top to bottom after the last client left. Rachel was sitting at the front desk doing payroll while I mopped.

“Any presents from Charlie this morning?” she asked.

“No. I don’t need presents. The notes, though…” I shook my head.

“That good?”

“Charlie gives good note. He left me one after that first day in the music shop. I have a whole collection from him.”

“That’s so sweet. One might even say romantic.” Rachel waggled her eyebrows at me, making me laugh.

“There’s no doubt he’s romantic. And it doesn’t even feel like he’s trying to be romantic, he just is, you know?”

She nodded. “He’s one of the good ones, E. He’s definitely no Edward.”

I sighed. “I know. But what he did...it reminded me so much of Edward and my parents. It triggered a lot of feelings I hadn’t faced. That I didn’t want to face.”

“Losing your parents?”

I looked down at my mop. “Yeah.”

Rachel came around the desk and wrapped me in her arms. “Joe and I will always be your family. It’s a permanent thing, no conditions. I know it’s not the same as having your parents, but you’ll never be alone. Got it?”

I nodded against her shoulder. “Got it. It’s not the same—it’s so much better.”

Rachel and I left the salon together, and when we got to my building, we both saw the brown paper bag sitting on my steps.

Rachel gasped. “Oh! What’s in it?”

I pulled the bag open and peeked inside, a delicious smell wafting up. “He left me dinner!”

She clutched her chest. “I’m not going to say anything, but do you hear that sound? It’s my heart going pitter-patter.”

I swatted at her. “Get out of here, you!”

Laughing and running away, she called, “See you tomorrow!”

I took my bag into the kitchen and removed the take-out container. Inside was a grilled chicken breast on a bed of brown fried rice. It looked healthy, yet more delicious than anything I’d make myself.

At the bottom of the bag was a note.

Three more days, and I could go to him and try to fix this. But there was a long, twenty-six-mile road ahead of me. One I’d have to travel alone. Once I did that, conquered it, then I’d be brave enough to take another chance with my heart.