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Daddy Secrets by Mia Carson (15)

Levi

The moment the door closed, I sagged.

“Are you okay?” Ella asked, her concern clear in her voice. “I’m sorry, Levi. I’ve ruined everything. You should just forget about me and

“Don’t!” I snapped. “Don’t tell me how I should feel or how I should treat you. I get enough of that from them,” I said with a jerk of my head toward the door.

“But your family!”

“We’ll get past this or we won’t, but I’m not going to let them run my life. I’m going to date who I want to date, be with who I want to be with. If they don’t like it, they have a choice to make. They can either accept me as who I am, and accept whoever I make part of my life, or we can go our separate ways.” I hurried to my truck, opened the door, and tossed the duffle into the seat. “I need to go. The longer I stand here, the worse it is.”

“Wait. Come to the house first. Mom and Dad will want to see you. Stay and have dinner with us. Please don’t go away mad.”

“I’m not mad. Well, not mad at you.”

“Upset then. Just have dinner with us before you go. I’m worried about you.”

I watched her a moment. The hope and concern on her face convinced me. “You’re sure your mom won’t mind? They’re not expecting me.”

“I’ll call them on the way. She won’t care.”

I blew out a long breath, trying to regain some balance. “Okay. Thanks.” I smiled at her, trying to lighten the mood. “I am a little hungry. I didn’t finish my lunch.”

She seemed to relax a bit. “I’ll see you there,” she said and hurried to her car.

I glanced at the house. Mom and Dad were standing in the living room, watching me through the window. I was too far away to make out their expressions, but I gave them a solemn wave in parting. They returned the wave before I walked around the front of my truck and sat down behind the wheel.

As I followed Ella, the weight of my actions began to press in on me. As I sat alone in the eight by twelve concrete room at the police station, I had time to reflect on my actions. I’d nearly started a brawl in Dolly’s. I should feel guilty, did for creating a scene, but I didn’t regret for a moment the fact I’d called Steve out for his actions. He wanted to get a rise out of me? Well, he’d gotten one.

But putting Mom and Dad on notice, that was a big step. I’d have preferred to steadily win them over to Ella, gradually reminding them how much they’d once adored her. Unfortunately, I could tell from talking to Mom when we arrived, their minds were made up. Mom, at least, saw what happened today as Ella’s fault. So long as they insisted on blaming Ella for the ill-advised actions of others, including those of myself, there would be no changing their minds.

If I’d stayed, I’d eventually say something I’d later regret. I’d seen the look on Mom’s face when I threw the rape at her, and that was mild compared some of the things I felt like saying. I’d hurt Mom’s feelings, and maybe Dad’s too, by walking out, but right now our house was a powder keg and Ella was the match.

I pulled to a stop behind her car and stepped out of the truck. I wasn’t sure this was a good idea. My relationship with the Johnsons had improved immensely, but that was before I tried to start a fight in Dolly’s. I took Ella’s arm and pulled her to a stop before she opened the door.

“Are you sure about this?” I asked.

She smiled and opened the door. “Come in and see for yourself. Mom? Dad? Levi’s here!”

Abby was the first to arrive, running down the hall to Ella, but Helen and Ken weren’t far behind. As Ella swept Abby up in her arms, Helen pulled me into hers and gave me a long hug.

“Thank you, Levi,” she said softly.

She stepped back and drew a finger under her eyes as if wiping away tears. Before I could recover from that enthusiastic and unexpected greeting, Ken had my hand in his, his free hand on my shoulder, as he gave my hand a firm shake.

“Yes, thank you. I’m glad you’re not in trouble with the law, but if something like this happens again, you call me. I’ll have you bailed out before your chair gets warm.”

I glanced at Ella as she whispered in Abby’s ear. As Ken released my hand, Abby reached for me. I took her.

“Thank you for helping my mommy,” Abby said and kissed me on the cheek.

That hit me hard, hard enough that I felt my own eyes tear up. “You’re welcome, Abby. I’ll always be there to help your mommy.”

“Come in, come in,” Helen said, motioning me deeper into the house. “I haven’t started dinner, but make yourself at home. You still remember where everything is, right?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“That reminds me,” Ella began, motioning me to the dinner table that shared space with the kitchen. While Helen moved about in the kitchen, the rest of us sat down at the table so we could all be together. “You need to avoid Dolly’s for a little while.”

I winced. “I’m really sorry that

“Oh, you hush,” Ella said. “She actually kind of supported what you did, but she doesn’t want people to think they can start breaking the dishes and get away with it.”

“I can understand that.”

“Don’t you mind that none,” Helen said as she hurried around in the kitchen. “You come here and I’ll feed you.” She became more serious. “Ella told me you had a falling out with Will and Judy. Is there anything Ken or I can do?”

I shook my head. “No, thank you, Mrs. Johnson. I’m sure we’ll work it out.”

“Well, until you do, you have a home here,” Ken said, and Helen nodded.

“Thank you, but I’ll be okay. It’s only for a couple of days.”

“Would you consider staying with us?” Helen offered. “We’ve got the room.”

I smiled at the offer. So many good memories were flooding back. Ken and Helen had been like a second set of parents once. They were working hard to make me feel that way again.

“Thank you for the offer, but I don’t want to be underfoot. The Hamlinton Inn will do for a couple of days.”

Helen nodded. “Okay, but if you change your mind, know that you’re welcome.”

For the next six hours we talked, had dinner, and talked some more. Ella and I recounted our versions of what happened at Dolly’s in exacting detail, much to the delight of Ken and Helen. They enthusiastically supported what I’d done and expressed disappointment they hadn’t been there to see it themselves. After they’d squeezed every detail out of us, the conversation turned to happier times past. There were plenty of stories swapped, lots of laughter, and more of those good memories bubbled to the top.

“Thank you, Mr. and Mrs. Johnson—” I began.

“What did we tell you about that?” Ken warned me playfully.

I grinned and tried again. “Thank you, Helen, Ken, for dinner and the company, but I should go.”

“You’re sure you won’t consider staying with us?” Ken asked.

“Thank you for the offer, but no.”

“Well, okay then. Will you at least join us for dinner tomorrow? I can do better than McDonalds, and since you can’t go to Dolly’s…” Helen suggested, letting the offer dangle.

“Okay, sure. Thank you.” That seemed to satisfy her, and I rose from my place at the table.

“Levi, wait just a second,” Ella said.

I sauntered to the front door and paused. I thought she was going to gather Abby, but she appeared without her, her purse slung over her shoulder.

Where’s Abby?”

“She’s spending the night with her grandma.” I felt a tingling rush of excitement but said nothing. She had to make the first move. I wasn’t going to pressure her after what she’d been through. “If you’re not willing to stay with Mom and Dad, would you consider staying with me?”

The rush of excitement grew. “Are you sure you’re ready for that?”

“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. Are you?”

Ken and Helen were giving us some privacy, so I pulled her into a quick kiss. “I’ve been waiting for the right time,” I whispered into her ear.

“This is it.”

I nodded. “Then I’m sure.”

She smiled in that way I remembered so well. “We have a lot of catching up to do.”

We stepped outside and she hurried to her car, pausing to smile at me over the hood before she disappeared into the vehicle. On the drive to her house, millions of thoughts raced through my mind. I wanted her. I wanted her like no woman since her, but I worried we were rushing into something. She was scarred by her experience, as any woman would be, and I didn’t want to damage her further.

The changes I’d seen in her in the last couple of weeks were remarkable. There was a vibrancy in her voice again, a vibrancy that had been missing when I spoke to her the first time after my return. But more than that, she was starting to hold her head up. No so much physically, but emotionally. She was starting to believe in herself again and it showed in hundreds of little ways. The way she walked, the way she talked, the way she smiled or looked at me. She was again becoming the woman I’d loved once, the woman I was falling hard for…all over again.

I was feeling the excitement of new love, but it was even better than the first time. I was older, more mature, and better able to understand what I was feeling and why. If Ella felt the same as I did, I could appreciate the gift she was giving me, not just her body, but her soul and spirit as well. Maybe because of that maturity, this time the feelings for her were richer and more nuanced. It was the difference between a melody played by an orchestra and one played on a kazoo. We already had history together, and we were rapidly falling into our old patterns. Tonight, sitting around the table at Ken and Helen’s, it was like I’d never left, and Ella hadn’t endured the humility and shame from Steve’s actions.

My concern was she thought she had to do this because it was expected. I’d wait until she was ready, no matter how long it took. I only wanted her if she truly wanted me in return, not if she was acting out of some self-destructive impulse, fear, or guilt. I’d only been home a couple of months. I wanted to see the improvements in her continue and didn’t want to dredge up painful memories, memories I was working hard to help her forget.

During my time as an MP, I’d once seen a rape victim right after the assault. The woman, an airman only a year or two older than I was at the time, had flinched and cowered anytime a man came near her, clearly devastated by her experience. She’d been beaten in the attack, and while I didn’t know what eventually happened to her, I still remembered the fear in her eyes as she watched me, as if she expected me to pick up where her attacker had left off. Her eyes had haunted me for weeks. That was about the time I began to settle down, and I have long believed it was the distrust in her eyes that tipped me over the edge and started me on the path to giving up my feral ways.

Ella hadn’t been beaten in her assault, as far as I knew, but I wanted her to trust me, to know I’d never force myself on her, and that she didn’t have to do this if she wasn’t ready. It might be a mood killer, but I had to be sure she understood that I’d wait, however long she needed until she was certain.

I pulled to a stop beside her Escape. She was smiling and bubbling over as she took my hand and pulled me to her door. The moment we were inside she moved in close, pressed herself against me, and drew me into a torrid kiss. I returned it for a moment but then detached. She looked at me in confusion.

“Ella, are you sure? After all that you’ve been

“Shhh…” she murmured as she placed two fingers against my lips. “I want this. I don’t want to talk about or think about the past. I have you again, and that’s all I care about right now.” She slowly removed her fingers, allowing them to softly stroke my lips with their removal. “I want you. I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anyone in my life.”

I held her gaze a moment. “You’ve got me,” I murmured as I drew the back of my hand gently along her cheek.

Her eyes closed as she took my hand, interlacing her fingers with mine. She held my hand to her cheek as she tipped her head slightly to the side, her face relaxed and so achingly beautiful. I slowly pulled my hand away, drawing it unhurriedly down her arm as my other hand did the same on her other side. Her eyes slowly opened. I fell into the pools of blue and became lost in their infinite depths. I slowly lifted my hands to her face, holding her gently as I lowered my lips to hers in a long, soft, caress.

I gradually pulled back. That had been the best kiss of my life. Her eyes opened lazily to hold my gaze, her lips slightly opened and begging to be kissed again as she gave me the smallest of nods. I wanted to swoop her into my arms and carry her to bed, but the hall to the back was narrow and I didn’t want to bump her trying to squeeze through. Instead, I took her hand and slowly led her past the smaller bedroom decorated for a little girl, then the bath, to the larger of the two bedrooms at the back of the trailer.

I steered her into the bed, and as she worked herself to the center, she pulled me down with her. I draped myself over her, drinking in the face of the woman I’d loved once, and now again.

“What?” she whispered.

“I love you.” The words came to my lips easily, naturally, as if I’d never stopped saying them. I saw her eyes well with tears. “What?”

“Do you mean it? How can you love me after

I stilled her voice by taking her lips again, showing her with touch when she didn’t believe my words. As I ended the kiss, I caressed her face with gossamer strokes of my fingertips.

“I do. I do love you. Maybe I never stopped. I should have never left. If I’d been here, then

“I love you too,” she said, interrupting me. “I never stopped, but I didn’t think you’d want me after

“I do want you. I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anyone.”

“Then take me.”

I brushed her lips with mine. “That’s not what I mean.”

She smiled. “I know, but I want you to make love to me like you did in your bedroom that day. Do you remember?”

“I remember,” I whispered as my lips closed over hers again.

We kissed slowly, luxuriantly, connections I thought dead coming to life again. I moved along her jaw with my lips, taking my time, allowing the bonds to reform between us. Our love had been strained and weakened, but it hadn’t been broken, and like muscles worked under tension, it had become stronger than ever.

I kissed my way down her neck to the place where it joined her shoulder, moving to the spot I knew she liked so well. Her soft exhale, the light pull of her hand on the back of my head, the sudden stiffness in her body, the caress of her hand on my back, made my heart sing. I didn’t care what my parents thought of her. Ella was mine, forever and always.

She pushed at me, and we rolled until she came to rest on me. She sat up, her legs to either side of my hips as she smiled down at me. I reached for her, but she brushed my hands away, her smile growing as she began to open the buttons on my shirt. I thrust up with my hips, a soft groan escaping me as a surge of pleasure washed over me. I pressed against her, my rigid member trapped between our bodies, delighting in how her eyes half closed and her mouth slowly opened as I did.

My shirt opened, she tipped forward and kissed me before she began a slow crawl down my body, watching my eyes as she slowly licked and kissed her way lower. Before she escaped my reach I gently pulled her shirt over her head and released her breasts from their lacy prison. She bewitched me with her smile as she kissed along the waistband of my jeans, her nimble fingers working at my buckle, button, and zipper. She exposed me, her nails lightly dragging along my length causing a storm of sensations to spread through me from her touch.

As she lowered herself to take me into her mouth, I covered myself with my hands and smiled. “Nuh-uh. Pants,” I said as I removed one hand long enough to flick my finger rapidly three times while toeing off my shoes.

The way she looked at me, the soft smile, the contained lust, made my heart thud in my chest. She backed away as her tongue peeked from between her lips. We took a moment to undress, and I admired her body as it was slowly revealed. She was perfect. Some men liked skinny women, but I liked a woman with curves, a woman said at a glance she wasn’t a boy. Ella had softened slightly with maturity, but she was still achingly beautiful. Her round face, big eyes, and lush body called to me, a goddess made real, and she was mine.

She came to me, her eyes bright like I hadn’t seen since I returned, and she kissed me. “I love you,” she murmured as our lips slowly parted. “I’ve missed you so much.”

“I love you,” I whispered, my hand gently stroking her face. We held each other’s gaze a moment before she turned, swinging a leg over my shoulders and lowering herself.

I began with butterfly kisses as she took me into her mouth, her tongue flicking and battering the head of my cock, and suddenly she plunged deep. I barked softly as she swallowed me, coughed, and backed off.

“Fuck, you’re big,” she purred before taking me deep again, more slowly.

I groaned as I slowly thrust up. She hadn’t been able to completely swallow me the last time we’d been together, and I relished the challenge of matching her skills. I’d learned a thing or two during our separation myself, and I intended to use them all.

We pleased each other for many long minutes, our soft gasps and moans filling the air. I was battling my orgasm as she licked and sucked at me when her busy tongue began to slow. She still had me in her mouth as she hummed, her hips rocking slowly. She began pumping my shaft with her fist, her saliva making me slick. I popped free of her mouth.

“Fuck, you’re about to make me come,” she groaned, her rhythmic stroking of my cock becoming disjointed. “Stop, I want to feel you inside when I come,” she whispered, but I didn’t stop. I pressed her, my tongue and lips busy, wanting to please her like no other man. “Levi, stop! I’m about to come.” She tried to pull away, but I tightened my grip around her hips. “Stop! You’re… going…”

Her soft moan was the single sexiest sound I’d ever heard from a woman as she quivered gently. She keened softly as I continued to devour her before she lunged away with a deep, grunting groan. She sagged over me, panting softly for a long moment, before she recovered.

She turned. “I want you,” she said softly. “I need you inside.”

Are you

“Yes,” she said, nodding her head, apparently reading my mind. “I’m safe. Please take me. Please. I want to feel you inside.”

I rolled her to her back and slowly entered her. No woman had ever felt better, and I couldn’t contain my groan as I sank into her depths. She fit me perfectly. I dropped to my elbows as I began to thrust with a slow, gentle pace, my lips searching for and finding hers.

The slow pace allowed me to fight my encroaching pleasure as I took her in the most intimate of positions. We held each other’s gazes, our smiles soft we kissed and touched.

“I’ve missed you so much,” I whispered before taking her lips again.

“And I’ve missed you,” she breathed. “Harder,” she begged as she moved with me.

I picked up my pace with a groan. I’d been holding on by my fingertips before, but the way her breasts were moving, the feel of her moving under me, the increased pace, they all conspired to overwhelm my control.

I groaned in erotic distress. “I’m going to come.”

“I want you to. I want to feel you come with me.”

I continued to drive into her, trying to distract myself, but it was no use. “I can’t hold it,” I grunted, picking up the pace, unable to stop my rising orgasm.

She moaned softly. “Not yet! Not yet! Don’t stop!”

It was our first time all over again. She excited me more than any other woman, and I couldn’t withstand her sensuality. “Shit!” I snarled as I fought my rapture.

She cried out, a soft sound of erotic distress before she pulled my mouth to hers just as she clamped down on me. Feeling her orgasm as she kissed me snipped the last thread holding back my climax. I moaned into her mouth as I thrust deep, holding myself there as I spilled into her. I kissed her with everything I had, our tongues engaged in their own erotic dance as we reached the peak of pleasure together.

We relaxed with a sigh as the heated kiss dissolved. I was spent, complete, and satisfied in a way I hadn’t felt in a long time. I settled over her, holding my weight on elbows and knees while burying my face in her neck, wanting to feel as close to her as possible. I was in a storm of emotions. I wanted to scream in excitement and cry for what had been wasted. I wanted to make mad, passionate love to her and hold her in my arms as I caressed her. I wanted to kiss away her pain and protect her from any that would dare hurt her. I wanted her. I wanted her in my life like no woman before her, or after her.

“Are you okay?” she whispered as her hand held my face to her neck, her other hand tracing lazy designs on my back.

“Yes. Are you?”

Oh yes.”

“I love you,” I said, lifting my head so I could see her. “I love you so much.”

She touched my lips. “And I love you. I’m so glad you’re home.”

“So am I,” I said as I lowered my lips to hers.