Alice was done with his brooding. Azrael was an enigma. After that strange interlude between them where he’d revealed there was something inside her and the argument later over her telling Chris about him, he’d kept his distance for two very long weeks. It bothered her far more than it should.
Her cheeks grew hot every time she thought about his body pressed up against her. Being so close to him stirred her senses. She ached with longing when she looked at him.
Is that why he’s staying away from me?
She surreptitiously watched him whilst they had the TV on. He wasn’t paying attention, merely lounging on the other sofa. She fiddled with her phone. Jason had been calling her on and off, but she never answered. He hadn’t gotten the message.
She’d been texting Chris. It was safer than calling him considering Azrael could hear their every word. Neither of them could make head nor tails of the angel’s behaviour. Everything about him was confusing. From the fact that he’d told her he hated humans to when he’d said he didn’t see her as his duty. Then what does he see me as? I wish he hadn’t just walked away that day. He’d refused to speak to her on the subject. She gave up trying to broach it.
She looked at Azrael again. His auburn hair was ruffled from where he’d run his hand through it. He was so effortlessly sexy. It made her head hurt. Every part of her burnt whenever their eyes met. She hated admitting that she was no longer indifferent to him.
I can’t understand why I want him. I don’t even like him, do I? That’s the problem. I think I do. I think I like him more than I really ever wanted or expected to.
His eyes met hers, one brow raised. She hastily looked away, knowing he was questioning what she was thinking. She couldn’t stay in the same room as him any longer. She got up, intending to go have a bath just for something to do.
She got three steps from the bedroom when she felt his hand on her arm. She turned around, staring up at him.
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“Away from you.”
“Why?”
“You know why.”
“I don’t think I do.”
“Why would I want to be around someone who won’t even speak to me? I’ve never felt so alone. Even when I was with Jason, I never felt like I was an inconvenience to him, but here, with you, that’s all I feel. I’m tired of it.”
There was confusion in his expression. The whole thing was exhausting.
He just doesn’t get it. I don’t even know why I’m trying to explain. He’s never going to understand how I feel.
Looking at him made her heart thump. He no longer hid his angelic nature from her or maybe it was just because he couldn’t. There was always a soft glow around him. It hurt to look at him, but that’s all she wanted to do. She couldn’t help it.
Azrael tugged her towards him, his hand on her face, tipping it up. She was so startled by his sudden movement, she didn’t even protest.
“You’re right. I don’t understand, but I know what you want from me. I can’t ignore what’s between us any longer.”
His eyes were on her mouth. He leant down, not giving her time to object before he kissed her. All the blood rushed to her head. His lips were incredibly soft. He pressed her closer. Kissing him was almost euphoric. Her skin tingled where he was touching it. Her hands were slack at her sides, his closeness, his lips, assaulting all her senses.
What… what is he doing? I didn’t ask for this. I never asked him to kiss me no matter how many times I wished he would. This isn’t fair.
She brought her hands up, shoving him away from her. Despite feeling bereft when his mouth was no longer on hers, she stared up at him with anger. The resounding slap across his face rang in both their ears.
“Don’t you touch me! Don’t you… just don’t!”
Her chest heaved. She was angry at him for presuming and angry at herself for enjoying it, for wanting him to kiss her senseless. He hadn’t flinched when she’d slapped him, his expression impassive.
“You dare try that shit again, I swear I’m going to leave. I don’t care if you come after me. I’m not your human toy. Don’t play games with me.”
She strode away into the bedroom. She stood in the middle of the room, panting and ran a hand through her hair. Her heart hammered, her skin thrumming from where his hands had been on her.
An Archangel just kissed me. Me. Does he like me?
Nothing about it made any sense. He hadn’t shown any interest in her other than wanting to know why she could see him. Why did he want to kiss her now?
She turned, feeling his presence. He filled the doorway, his green eyes roaming over her. He strode towards her. She sucked in a breath, backing away until she was against the window. He slammed a hand down above her.
“What have I done to make you think you’re a toy to me, Alice?”
She gulped, quivering at the intensity of his presence. He wasn’t holding back. Not one bit.
“What else do you call kissing me when you don’t even like me?”
He leant down until his mouth was next to her ear.
“I’ve never told you I don’t like you. It is quite the opposite.”
She trembled.
Wait, what? What does he mean it’s the opposite? Does… does that mean he wants me in the same way I want him? That’s impossible.
“What do you mean?”
“Were you not listening when I said you are not my duty? No, Alice, you are more than that. So much more. Being near you drives me crazy.”
His breath on her ear made her heart pound faster. She wanted him to kiss her again. It was insane, but it was the truth. His tongue curled around the back of her ear. It made her twitch.
“What are you doing?” she whispered.
“Daring to try again.”
His lips peppered her jaw before they met hers. His kiss was more forceful this time. He took one of her hands, holding it above her head, pressing against her. Blood pounded in her ears. His solid body was warm and inviting. Her free hand curled around his back as she responded to his advances. She couldn’t help it. Kissing him was the single most incredible experience of her life.
Is this what being on drugs feels like? Shit, he’s just… so… powerful.
His other hand cupped her face, deepening the kiss. His tongue against hers felt like fire. She emitted a small moan of pleasure.
Don’t stop, please, don’t stop, Az.
Begging him to continue in her head was mortifying, but he didn’t let up. Everything was centred on where his skin met hers. She couldn’t think straight.
Kissing an angel was nothing like kissing a human. The two were incomparable. Heat pooled inside her. She wanted to touch him, to feel all of him. She ached with desire, longing. She wanted him. Wanted his hands all over her body. His skin against hers.
Why the hell do I want this? Why can’t I stop thinking about what it’d be like to be naked with him?
She felt him smile against her mouth for a moment.
Oh, crap. I need to learn how to control my thoughts around you.
“Do you want me to take you to bed, Alice?” he whispered, pulling away.
She couldn’t speak. He was staring at her with heat, passion, fire.
Did she?
She wanted his mouth on hers again. She didn’t want to think about the implications, the consequences of what they were doing.
Kiss me, please. I want what you’re offering me.
He let go of her hand, cupping her face with both of his. He pulled her away from the window. Throwing caution to the wind, they kissed each other again. He walked her over to the bed, pausing for a moment to pluck the glasses from her face. He placed them carefully on the bedside table. He pressed her down on the bed, covering her body with his own.
“Wait,” she said.
He paused, looking down at her. The soft glow he emitted made her heart stop. He was so ethereally beautiful it made her head hurt. She didn’t really want him to stop, but she had to ask him something before they continued.
“Do… do you actually want to do this?”
“Kiss you?”
“Well, yes, that and…”
The unspoken question hung between the two of them. Did he want to sleep with her or was he going through the motions because it’s what he thought she wanted?
He opened his mouth to reply, but he froze the next moment.
“Lucifer,” he growled.
“What?”
“He’s here.”
He rolled off her abruptly, getting off the bed the next moment. Her heart wrenched painfully at the loss of his presence.
Stop it, heart!
“Here?”
“On Earth. I need to go.” He looked down at her. “Stay here, Alice. Don’t leave under any circumstances. Do you understand?”
She nodded. It couldn’t be good news if the Devil himself had risen. He began to move towards the door. She tore off the bed.
“Az!”
He paused in the doorway. She ran to him, wrapping her arms around his back. She pressed her face into the solid wall of muscle.
“Don’t get hurt,” she whispered.
She didn’t know why she was worried about him. He was one of the most powerful beings in this world.
“I won’t.”
His voice sounded cautious. He turned in her arms, his dazzling green eyes meeting hers. Whatever he saw in her expression, made his soften. He cupped her face.
“I’ll return to you. I fully intend to finish what we started.”
He pressed a kiss to her forehead, but it wasn’t enough. She caught his face before he could pull away. She pressed her mouth to his. Heat burnt between them. He pulled her closer, devouring her mouth. She didn’t want him to go. She wanted to explore what was between them. Intimately.
These feelings… I don’t know how to explain them, but I need you to be safe.
He pulled away, a troubled expression on his face.
“He’s not a danger to me, only you. I’ll be back.”
He released her and strode away. She put a hand to her mouth where she could still feel the ghost of his lips. She backed away, sitting down on the bed.
Why do I care so much about him already?
Putting her head in her hands, she let out a long sigh. Az wasn’t just a man, he was an Archangel and he was giving his attention to her. She wasn’t sure what she’d done to deserve it. He’d been so dismissive of humans when they’d met. They’d argued countless times, but he’d done nothing but protect her anyway. And now he’d kissed her.
Her phone buzzed in her pocket. She pulled it out, looking down at the screen. Jason. She sighed. She should just get this over with. She hadn’t wanted to talk to Jason whilst Azrael was around, but she might as well take the opportunity whilst he was out dealing with Lucifer.
“Hello Jason.”
“You’ve finally answered.”
“What do you want?”
“I miss you.”
She gritted her teeth. Funny that. I don’t miss you. Not one bit.
“You should’ve thought about that before you cheated on me.”
“Please, Alice, I just want to talk. Will you meet with me?”
“No.”
“Please, I promise I’ll do better. I’ve made a huge mistake.”
No kidding.
“I don’t have anything to say to you.”
“Just one drink, please.”
“I can’t.”
Azrael had told her to stay put. She wasn’t about to leave the penthouse when Lucifer was out there. It was the first time he’d left her properly alone since they’d met.
“Then I’ll come to you.”
“No.”
“Alice, just give me a chance.”
She closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. Jason wasn’t going to take no for an answer.
“Fine.”
She gave him the address of a bar nearby before hanging up. Guilt flooded her. She’d told Azrael she wouldn’t leave, but what harm would she come to? She’d give Jason ten minutes then she’d come right back.
She went to the wardrobe, pulling out something more appropriate. She changed before putting on a dash of makeup.
I’ll show Jason I’m better off without him.
She put her contacts in before she picked up her bag and shrugged on her coat.
Stepping into the lift, she fidgeted.
Az is going to kill me if I get into any trouble.
She wasn’t sure why he even cared about her, but his actions spoke louder than words. He told her he wanted to continue what they’d started. He wanted to kiss her again, but did that mean he wanted more? She wasn’t sure how she could believe that he, Azrael the Archangel of Death, would want her, a human.
She hurried out of the building before she changed her mind. A few minutes later, she entered the bar. Sitting by himself, his blonde hair messy, blue eyes twinkling, was Jason. She took measured steps towards him. His eyes lit up when he saw her.
“You came,” he said.
“Yes.”
She sat down next to him. She regretted even coming out. It was a stupid idea.
“You look good.”
“Get to the point, Jason.”
His expression fell and he sighed.
“I’m sorry.”
I feel nothing. His apology is meaningless. Jason isn’t who I care for. The man I feel something for isn’t here. He’s with his brother. Oh, Az, what am I doing?