Did she just say pregnant?
And then I’m pushing off the floor, a loud curse escapes my lips, betraying my location.
What the fuck did that animal do to her?
I’m a lion, roaring on the inside. My legs have a mind of their own and I find myself right back at the bathroom door, before I can stop myself.
I’m staring down at the two women. “Who did this to you?” From the looks on their faces I’m sounding way too dangerous. I try to relax my body, uncurling my fists and dropping down to the ground in front of them.
“Whisper—”
“It’s Sara.”
No it’s not! It’s only ever been Whisper.
“Darlin’, did…” Fuck—I can’t even say it. I try again. “Did Cezar rape you?” The word ‘rape’ comes out animalistic, but I can’t contain the anger inside me.
“Edge, you need to be calmin’ down.” Miss Catherine breaks through the roaring in my head with a firm hand on my arm. “This isn’t helpin’ none,” she reminds me.
From the frightened look on Whisper’s face, she’s right. My sweet and wild girl still won’t look at me.
“Sara, you have my word I won’t hurt you ever again, but I need ans—”
“Edge?” Drill has come barging into the bathroom and I can hear a dull thudding from a herd of feet drawing closer.
My back is to Drill. “Out—Drill,” I say through clenched teeth, “and that goes for everybody else about to make it their business. No fucker is to come into Ghost’s bedroom or this bathroom. And I mean NOBODY,” I shout. “Not even Boxer!”
Whisper visibly startles when I shout. Shit. I wasn’t meant to scare her. I just need to know if that motherfucker got inside her. My fear for her being raped has me seeing red. I need answers and I need to give her privacy to get those. I gotta know who did this to her.
Where the fuck is Boxer and Doc? Would’ve thought all the commotion would have had him peeling in here, gun raised, and aimed at me. Doc should at least have some answers for me.
“Edge, whatever the fuck has got you riled up, now is not a good time.” Hazard is at my back ready to go all bear-hug on me.
“Give me your gun, Hazard.” And this is where I lose all credibility with Hazard and my brothers. I hear cursing and ‘what the fucks’ bouncing off the bathroom walls.
“Edge…” Phoenix slides down beside Whisper, a wary look on her face. She’s ready to protect my girl with her life “What you thinking of doing with that gun?” She’s even bought a ticket onto my crazy train.
Oh, for fuck’s sake!
I hang my head in an endeavor to cool my raging thoughts. “Sweets, the gun isn’t for me.”
“I don’t understand.” Phoenix is playing the buying time game.
I can picture all my brothers fanned out behind me as they get ready to take me down if they believe I’ve lost my fuckin’ mind. I need to reassure them, I’m as solid as I was the last time I saw them.
I turn around and look at my brothers. “Really?” As suspected, they are all ready to dive on me.
“Edge, you’re tired and you ain’t thinking straight,” Hazard says, leaning over so close, he’s practically breathing on me. “You’re requesting a gun in the same room as Sara, when Boxer is taking a much needed rest a few doors down. Lucky for you he won’t be awake for at least eight hours, due to Doc giving him a sleeping beauty elixir”—the man actually stops to take air in—“and now, after looking like you need a damn good shot of elixir yourself, you want us to leave you alone with Sara, Miss Catherine and a loaded weapon?” He’s about to breathe fire on me. “When pigs fly, my brother… when pigs fuckin’ fly.”
Then he changes tactics. “Have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately? How ‘bout you have a shower, catch some sleep, then we can reconvene. You and Sara can have a powwow once you’re feeling more in control, because you got a look in your eyes that tells me you need to take a step back.”
Fuck what he thinks. “So which one of you is gonna give the gun to Sara to use on me if I put one foot out of line?” I’ve suddenly grown deaf to Hazard’s words as I look around him.
“Jesus, Edge! She can’t very well squeeze a trigger with those hands of hers,” Hazard says taking a few steps away from me. His hands grip his hips as he paces his anger out. “You can count that as a big, fat, nope!” The man’s mighty pissed off at me.
I let out a heavy sigh and look around to Whisper. “My point is I’m not going to hurt you. Hell—somebody give a loaded gun to Miss C, she’s capable. Even she can’t miss something vital from point blank range.”
“I resent that comment, because I be capable from farther away.” She sniffs a little in annoyance, but tries her damndest not to let a little smile leak onto her face. Thank fuck she’s on my side. I don’t doubt dem bones of hers have weighed me up and know me to be true to my word.
“I ain’t out to hurt Sara; I want to make her feel safe. I want to talk and I hoped to give her privacy. I would ask Miss C to leave, but she can be your insurance. Hell… handcuff me if you need to, but I am doing this in private, and nobody is gonna stop me and I’m doing it now!”
The room falls silent.
You could hear a pin drop.
I trust every one of these men and I know they are trying to slow me down and do the right thing for everybody concerned.
“I don’t hear any feet shuffling out of the room.” Really? “Who here doesn’t trust me?”
I wait.
Nobody speaks.
“Glad that’s settled. Somebody give Miss C a gun, handcuff me where I can’t reach the ladies, and get OUT!”
“No need for a gun,” Whisper says quietly. “I’m pregnant with Edge’s baby—”
And that’s when the room is full of ‘what-the-fucks’ again, and I seem to be doing a slight tilt while my mouth gapes open, like a fish struggling for water.
“You weren’t raped, thank God!” The relief is enormous, my shoulders sagging from the weight of fear I was carrying.
I forget the room is full of people and Phoenix and Miss C are sitting either side of Whisper. In this moment, there is only me and her.
“Mine, for sure?” I ask her, our eyes meeting. I won’t admit it out loud, but the idea my sweet and wild girl is going to grow a big tummy with my baby inside her… well, I don’t quite want to trust my heart with that news, just yet. Good things don’t often happen to me.
“Yes,” she says, with a crimson face.
“I won’t lie, this is a shock.”
“I understand.” She looks worried about my reaction.
Before I can say anything else, strong hands clasp my shoulders. “Shit, Edge, don’t you use condoms?” Lethal says from behind me. And the fucker sounds like he finds it funny.
“I did use a condom.” My mind travels back to the car lot where I definitely rolled one on.
“Ruby was pregnant… Mathias said so,” I find myself murmuring, still a little dazed by what Whisper just laid on me.
“Rose was protecting me,” Whisper says sadly. “She was afraid Cezar might kill me if he knew. Rose knew I was getting sick and she suspected straight away. I thought I had caught a virus. Mathias found us together in the toilet, he heard us talking, and assumed it was Rose who was pregnant, so she let him think it. Rose was so broken, yet she still tried to protect me. Mathias thought he was protecting Rose’s secret, something we both didn’t understand, but were grateful no limelight was shone on either of us, because Cezar would have killed us.”
“Christ!” I rub a hand over the back of my head.
“Edge…” My head swings like a pendulum until I locate Hazard. “Adam confirmed Whisper’s pregnancy, caught her puking and got her to take another test in The Pen. Ghost messaged Doc Evelyn when the helicopter went down and gave her the heads up.”
What the hell? Hazard, Ghost and Doc Evelyn already knew?
“Am I the last to find out?” I ask him.
“Ah… no.” Hazard clears his throat. “Only a few of us knew and kept it quiet, because it wasn’t our story to tell.”
“Boxer, know?” I figure he would, but I gotta hear for myself.
“Yes, he knows.” Whisper’s eyes are downcast. “There has been no other man... um… since. You’ve been my…” she trails off.
It’s time to clear the room.
“Miss Catherine, you staying or going?” She’s been very quiet watching the both of us. “Because all these boneheads and Phoenix are now leaving.”
Thank fuck they all listen this time, including Phoenix.
“You want me to be stayin’, Sara?” Miss Catherine knows to give Whisper her own mind.
“I’ll be okay with Edge, by myself. He doesn’t need a gun or to be handcuffed.” Her face is flaming red. Fuck. I tried to give her privacy. This must have been hard for her.
I help Miss Catherine to her feet and watch her shuffle out the bathroom.
Whisper’s suddenly up on her knees doing an about turn and muttering about getting sick and then she’s retching.
I gather her much longer strands of hair, keeping them away from her face while she hurls her guts up and rub her back with slow soothing circles. Has she caught a virus or is this morning sickness? I do a mental calculation of close to six weeks since the night I met Sara in the bar.
Whisper’s pregnant with my baby. I don’t know what this means for us, but I can’t help feeling selfish and wanting to be a part of this babies life. I want to be a part of Whisper’s life, but I need to tread carefully. I need to earn my place in her life, and hope we can be something to each other.
The night we talked in the bar, I got to learn a little about her, I liked her. I wanted to spend more time with her, but wanting and getting were two different things in my life.
Then we fucked, and as crude as that sounds, she had me wanting to come back for more. I would have found a way to come back to Connard.
But then I went and royally fucked it all up.