Chapter 11
Lane
Give or Take
The kid looked even younger and more fragile in clothes that fit, all spit-shined and polished up. There was no way he was a day over sixteen, and that was probably pushing it. His eyes were locked on my phone, which he was holding in a death grip. Brynn wasn’t exaggerating when she said he was freaking out over the radio silence from his brother. I would be in the same spot if I couldn’t get ahold of Sutton or Cy for any length of time, so I was going to do my best to get Bauer to Denver as quickly as possible. Hoping against hope that Mikey was tied up in some typical garbage that came with being a new adult and on your own for the first time. Those were distractions that seemed so important at the time and could make him forget just how much his little brother relied on him. It happened to the best of us.
“Are you bummed that you didn’t get to experience Vegas in all its glittery glory?” Brynn asked the question sounding somewhat worried about my answer. She was walking close to my side, but her eyes were locked on the young man we were following. She felt responsible for him. She had clearly taken on his pain as her own so that he wouldn’t have to carry the burden alone. I admired her for it, but it also made me worry. There was no telling what was waiting for us in Denver and I wasn’t going to throw the kid to the wolves. I promised her I wouldn’t get anyone with a badge involved in Bauer’s situation, but if the brother wasn’t up to par, or if something had happened to him, I didn’t have a choice. I wasn’t going to put her in a dangerous situation because she was too blinded by her soft spot for the boy.
“I don’t think I need anything Vegas has to offer. Everything I wanted was in my bed last night and this morning.”
She blushed, and her head tilted to the side as she finally pulled her eyes off of Bauer and looked up in my direction. “I thought you were all for flashy and glitzy. That seems to be your thing.”
I frowned down at her and used a fingertip to push back the brim of my ball cap. “What are you talking about? I’m a simple country boy through and through.”
She snorted and rolled her dark eyes. “Except when it comes to women. The brighter they shine, the more you seem to notice them.”
It was my turn to cock my head to the side and study her. “The only thing I notice about a woman is if she’s noticing me. I’ve spent my entire life getting looked over for Cy and Sutton. I learned early on to pay attention to the women who weren’t using me as a replacement cowboy.”
She made a face, and I saw her jaw clench. “The clients from the ranch you spend time with, they all look like they stepped off the pages of a magazine or came from a reality TV show. There is nothing about them that is simple or country.” She couldn’t hide that my choice of recent bed partners rubbed her the wrong way.
“All those women have one important thing in common, Brynn.” I reached out a hand and hooked our pinkie fingers together like I used to do when we were kids. “I knew each and every single one of them was leaving at the end of the week or in a couple of days. None of them were going to stick around, so it didn’t matter that I had zero emotional investment in them. None of them could hurt me because none of them were the type of woman I could ever see by my side for the long haul. It was all fun and games. No risk and fleeting reward.”
Except it wasn’t always fun and rarely did it feel like a game that had any winner. I didn’t want to be lonely any more than anyone else, but at some point, the endless one-night stands started to make me feel even more isolated than I did when I was alone. The type of women I was wasting my time with reminded me of my mother, all fantasy, and no substance. They were safe because I knew I would never love a woman like Lydia Warner which meant I would never end up a broken shell of a man like my father. No one would ever own me that way. Only it was starting to feel more and more like I belonged to the woman at my side all along.
“Is that what you’re afraid of, Lane, being hurt?” Her shoulder brushed mine as we reached the elevator and Bauer violently jabbed at the little button.
I shrugged which shifted the weight of the duffle bag I was carrying. “I’m afraid of not being enough just like my old man. I’ve got a good life, and I like the man my father raised me to be, but all of that has to be enough for the girl who gets me. I've seen what happens when it isn’t. I don’t want to kill myself trying to give someone the whole world when my little part of it, the part of it that we occupy together, is all theirs. I will give the person who’s mine all that I have…why shouldn’t that be enough?”
“For the right person that’s more than enough, that’s more than they will probably ask for.” It was more than she’d ever asked for considering she had never, not once since the very beginning asked for anything from me or from anyone else in my family.
The metal doors swished open, and Bauer gave me a look over his shoulder. “Be happy you have a piece of something to share with someone, dude. There are a lot of us out here that don’t have anything to give to anyone.”
That was a startling and heartbreaking bit of insight from someone too young to feel like they didn't have anything to give to anyone.
His eyebrows arched and a crooked grin split his banged-up face. He looked down at our hooked fingers and mumbled, “Looks like you decided to take the risk? Was it worth it?”
I couldn’t suppress a chuckle. “The friendship was never really at risk. It’s been through hell and back and survived things that definitely should have killed it. It’s pretty damn resilient.”
Brynn dug her elbow into my side and pressed the button to take us down to the lobby. “It was on life support for a while. Neither one of us was ever quite willing to pull the plug though.”
Bauer shifted uncomfortably, his fingers tightening even more on my phone. “I’ve never had anyone like that except for Mikey. He was always there for me, always had my back. He never let anyone talk down to me or pick on me for being one of the only out kids in our town. If something happened to him because of me, I wouldn't be able to handle it.” He was already on edge, one tiny push from any direction and he was going over. He wouldn’t be headed back to the streets if something bad happened to his brother. No, if Mikey was hurt or worse, Bauer’s next stop was six-feet under.
Brynn let out a breath and quietly assured the timid teenager. “You have us now. And you just heard how stubborn we both are when it comes letting go of someone we care about.” I could see how badly she wanted to reach out to him, to pull him into her arms and offer him the comfort and security he’s been robbed of his entire life. “You aren’t alone.”
The doors opened silently, and Bauer took the opportunity to escape the thick blanket of concern Brynn was trying to wrap around him. He pushed at his floppy auburn hair and fiddled with the phone in his other hand. Sensing he needed some space I tugged Brynn back to keep her a few paces behind the teenager as he zipped and buzzed his way along the busy carpet and past rows and rows of already hopping slot machines. Once again, I thought the sheer number of people and the noise level was overbearing. I also hated that every breath I took was clogged with cigarette smoke. How anyone ever thought of this madness as a way to get away from it all was beyond me. I was pretty certain my first trip to Vegas would also be my last.
I moved my hand to Brynn’s lower back, and in my mind, I saw the way her spine dipped in right there and daydreamed about the way her delectable ass felt in my hands as I hammered into her. There was no comparison between Brynn and another woman. They were all forgettable and forgotten. Whereas every single part of her from the very start was imprinted on some part of my memory. Every word she spoke, every face she made, the way she moved, the way she felt, the way she tasted and turned in my arms, none of that would ever be forgotten regardless of where we ended up at the end of the road trip. She was so much a part of me that I was starting to suspect I wouldn’t be the man I was without her. She taught me as much about love and loss as the old man taught me about breeding cattle and branding.
I was so distracted by my thoughts and my plans for the future, a future that definitely had her and I doing a whole lot more of what we were doing upstairs, that I didn’t notice that Bauer had stopped abruptly. I stumbled a little, grabbing onto the kid to keep from sending him to the ugly carpet when I bumped into him. He looked over his shoulder at me, eyes twice as wide as normal and lower lip trembling.
I kept my hand on his shoulder and lowered my head so he could hear me over the din and ding of the casino. “What’s up, kid?”
He blinked rapidly and gulped so loudly that I could hear him above the racket around us. “There are three guys at the front door. They’re all looking at their phones and checking out every youngish looking guy who walks by. What if they’re here for me?”
“How is that possible? How would the people who took you know you were with us in Vegas? Why wouldn’t they just assume you went to the police back in California when Lane got you out of the RV?” Brynn sounded slightly shrill, but she purposely moved so that she was in front of Bauer, keeping his smaller frame trapped between the two of us. I snatched my camo hat off my head and plopped it down over his. I motioned for Brynn to hand me the black Ray-Bans she had hooked in the collar of her shirt and silently handed those to the teenager as well. It wasn’t much in the way of disguises, but it was the best we could do in a pinch.
I leaned around the two of them so I could get a look at the men who had the kid so spooked. Sure enough, three hulking bodies that looked like they belonged as extras in a gangster movie were lurking at the front of the lobby near the doors. I’d left my truck with the valet the day before, so that was the only way out.
“I texted Mikey, and I sent him an email. I told him where I was going and I gave him your plate number just in case something happened. If I didn’t make it to Denver, I wanted him to have some kind of clue to find me.” He looked back at me and even though I couldn’t see his eyes with those dark shades on I could clearly feel the panic pouring off of him. “That’s why he isn’t answering. They did something to him to get information about me.”
“Hey,” I squeezed his shoulder again. “You don’t know that. We don’t know anything yet.” But I had to admit it was the only way they could know where we were. There were too many hotel/casinos on the Strip for them to randomly pick the one where Bauer just happened to be, not to mention the fact they seemed to know he was no longer alone in the desert. Three guys that size was overkill for an underfed street kid.
“My brother would never sell me out, not willingly. I have to get to Denver…NOW!” He moved as if he was going to go around Brynn, but she blocked him by extending her arms and stepping backward.
“I’ll get you to Denver. But you need to use your head. There is no way you stayed alive on the streets as long as you did, doing what you did, without thinking smart.” I pushed past both of them, turning to face Brynn. “Find a side exit. Make sure the men in black aren’t watching it and slip out. Find a crowd of people and try and blend in as they move up the Strip. Make your way to the next casino, and I’ll come pick you guys up at the entrance. Keep your heads down and move quickly.” I motioned for Bauer to hand me my phone back and told Brynn to text me when they got somewhere safe.
Brynn gave me a sharp nod and reached back to grab Bauer’s hand. His was shaking, but hers was rock steady. “How do you know they aren’t looking for me and you as well? What if they know what you look like too, Lane?”
“I’ll deal with it. You take care of the kid.” She nodded stiffly and bit her lip. I bent my head so that I could soothe the abused flesh with a kiss. “Cy was right. This is so much bigger than we thought it was.”
Bauer made a noise that sounded like he was choking as he reached forward to clutch at the back of Brynn’s shirt. “Oh, my God…they want me because I accidentally overheard RV guy telling BMW guy who the client was. I know who they sold me to.”
My head whipped around and I frowned at the cowering teenager. “What?”
Bauer nodded and pressed himself into Brynn’s back. He was shaking like a leaf, and I was worried about him being able to stay on his feet. This conversation was killing valuable minutes, but this new revelation was eye-opening. Bauer was more than the property they bought and sold; with the knowledge he was carrying around in his brain, he was a goddamn liability.
“Who bought you, Bauer?” Who in their right mind thought that purchasing a child for sex, and lord only knew what else, was okay?
The kid shook his head at my question and started to pull Brynn back toward the busy casino. His head was down, and he looked like he was a split second away from bolting. “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you. No one would. That’s what RV guy told me when I told him that I overheard the name. We gotta go.”
Brynn turned pleading eyes to mine, so I nodded at her. “Go. I’ll be okay.” At least this time the threat was right in front of me, and I was walking right at it instead of the ambush that took me out last time. Before she took off, she stepped into my space and threw her arms around my neck. She put her mouth on mine and kissed me as if it was her life that depended on it…because it kind of did. I kissed her back with just as much fervor, making sure she could feel my resolve to get us all out of this.
I let her go, and she immediately grabbed Bauer’s hand and started to pull him through the crowds that were starting to gather in the bustling casino. She did what I told her to, kept her head down, and soon they were lost in the sea of strangers. Taking a deep breath and steeling myself for whatever was waiting, I shoved my hand through my flattened hair and started for the front doors. I called down for the truck before Brynn and I had left the room, so all I had to do was collect the keys and run like a bat out of hell.
As I approached, I kept my eyes on the toes of my boots and begrudgingly admitted Cy was right…as usual. I should have called Wyatt Bryant last night and asked him if he had any Fed buddies who were willing to get involved in this mess. It was all quickly spiraling out of control. When I got close to the first man, he gave me a thorough once over and looked back down at his phone. He let me pass without a word but the second guy, the one closest to the door stuck out a hand and forced me to stop or muscle my way past him. I paused and gave the goon my best good ol’ boy grin.
“Can I help you?” I tucked my phone into my front pocket and hooked my thumb through my belt loop. I could do simple and country in my sleep. It was a role I was used to playing. I liked it when people underestimated me. It gave me the upper hand.
“Where are you visiting from, cowboy?” The guy in the suit was trying to appear friendly, but failing terribly.
I cocked my head to the side “Why? Do you work for the hotel? Did I win something? Hot damn! I never win nothing.” I widened my grin and made sure I kept my posture relaxed when all I wanted to do was punch him in the face over and over again. I could see the screen of his phone the way he had it tilted. Sure enough, there was an image of Bauer looking terrified and so young on the device.
“Sorry, no. I’m looking for the owner of the black pickup out front. You look like the type to drive something like that. The plates are from Wyoming.” He sneered at me. “Those boots look like they belong in Wyoming.”
Shit. They were watching the truck. I hadn’t factored not being able to get to Brynn and Bauer into my rushed plan.
I was silently sizing the guy up, wondering if I could take all three of them and how heavily armed they were when suddenly the chaos of the casino amped up to a thousand. A shrill alarm went off, sounding like an air raid siren and suddenly hotel and casino staff were ushering the packed casino floor in our direction, clearing everyone out as the fire alarm continued to blare. The guy in black reached for my arm, but I deftly maneuvered out of his grasp putting space and people between us as he lifted his phone to his ear. I waved a hand for the harried-looking valet. Keeping an eye on both the men dressed in black as the battle-scarred tourists began flooding out of every opening. The noise outside was worse than it was inside and the fear of the vacating people was tangible. They were the best distraction ever, and I sent up a silent thank you to the heavens. I was pretty sure Brynn was the one who pulled the alarm. She was always quick on her feet. I told her to find a crowd to move in, and she had gone one step further to create a mob to get lost in. Saving my ass in the process.
“Let me move my vehicle so the emergency trucks can get in.” I pointed to the truck and waited impatiently for the guy to find my keys. A security guard was threading his way through the crowd, so I reached out and tapped his shoulder to get his attention. He seemed irritated but paused when I told him, “Three guys are walking around dressed head to toe in black. They were lurking at the front of the casino before the alarm was pulled. I don’t know if they were armed, but it was suspicious as hell.” There was no need to mention the tragedy that had befallen Vegas several months earlier. Anything that was even the slightest bit off was a threat, and those in charge took it as credible intel they had to investigate.
Once I had my keys in hand, I tore out of the entrance like I was driving a race car instead of a truck.
It was time to call for backup. There was too much at stake.
Chapter 12
Brynn
Live or Die
Bauer was shaking so badly that it was a mini-miracle he was still on his feet. The kid was holding onto his composure, barely, but he was doing it. The path out of the side door appeared to be clear, but I wasn’t taking any chances. This entrance was far less populated and crowded than the main doors, and anyone looking for Bauer would have no trouble spotting him if we went out this way. I was scrambling to think of a good distraction when the red fire alarm mounted on the wall near the restrooms caught my eye. I knew there were a million cameras trained on the casino floor, but I had to take the chance that I was faster than security would be.
I nudged the teenager with my elbow and waited until he slowed enough that we were walking side by side. I tilted my head so I could whisper in his ear. “As soon as I move I want you to run for those doors.” I indicated our escape with a lift of my chin. I pressed my phone into his clammy hand and ordered, “Don’t wait for me and don’t look back. Get somewhere safe and call Lane so he can come and pick you up. Understand?”
He took the phone reluctantly. He tugged the nose of my sunglasses down so were eye to eye and muttered, “What about you? I can’t show up without you. Lane will flip out.”
Lane would flip, but he would also do the right thing and protect Bauer while getting him somewhere safe until he figured out what was going on with the kid’s brother. He couldn’t stop being a hero, even when things went absolutely wrong, and that was one of the things that I loved most about him.
“Lane will get you to Denver no matter what. I’ll be right behind you, but if it looks like you’re lingering and waiting around for something to happen, that makes us both look suspicious. Lane said we should find a crowd to blend into in case that exit is being watched. It’s too early for there to be many people on the streets. If I can’t find a crowd, I’m going to make one.” I grabbed his hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “It’s going to be okay. I know that it’s hard for you to believe that since things have never ended up okay for you in the past, but your team is due for a win, Bauer. I’m not going to let you down, and I know for a fact Lane would rather die than let anything happen to either of us.” I waited until I got the smallest nod of acknowledgment. He didn’t know how to believe in anyone else, but he was willing to try for me. “Good. Now go!”
I gave him a gentle shove and waited until he was a few feet away with the exit in clear sight. Glancing around to make sure our little heart to heart hadn't attracted any unwanted attention I made sure the coast was clear and meandered toward the bathroom. I bent my head down, letting my long hair fall forward and cover my face. I was glad our rush this morning prevented me from pulling the thick mass up and out of the way like I normally did. I kept my eyes on that little white lever, fingers twitching where my hands swung loosely at my thighs.
“Excuse me, dear.” I almost jumped when the door to the bathroom swung open, revealing an older woman dressed head to toe in contrasting neon colors. She smiled politely at me while fidgeting with her designer purse. I put a hand on my racing heart and forced myself to return her friendly expression. “You wouldn’t happen to know if there is a Starbucks anywhere around here, would you? I’m dying for a frappuccino.”
I shook my head in the negative and shifted a step closer to the alarm. “I have no idea. I just got in last night and haven't had much chance to explore.”
She waved a heavily jeweled hand in the air and stepped around me. “No problem. I’m sure there’s gotta be one close by.” The woman cocked her head to the side and studied me for a painfully long moment. I could see Bauer shifting uncomfortably out of the corner of my eye. “You’re quite lovely, my dear. That is some very unusual coloring you have. That red hair can’t be natural. Your stylist deserves an award.”
Any other time and place I would have had something smart to say to that, but right now there were more pressing matters at hand. I thanked the woman for her backhanded compliment, and once she was gone, I lunged for the alarm handle before anyone else could exit the restroom. Almost instantly an ear-splitting shriek and flashing lights filled the occasion. The gamblers glued to the slot machines barely flinched, but the rest of the hotel guests milling about the lobby immediately started muttering and looking for available exits.
Bauer bolted just like I instructed him to. I saw his thin frame delicately weaving between bodies as people surged toward the door. I kept the family camo hat in sight as I followed a hundred feet behind him. Security started filling the floor, guiding pedestrian traffic while talking into invisible microphones and scanning the increasingly nervous crowd. I moved swiftly and with purpose, keeping my eyes on the prize, refusing to be distracted by the mayhem I created.
As soon as Bauer was out the side door, I let myself breathe a sigh of relief. Unfortunately, that reprieve was short lived as my upper arm was grasped in a steely grip. I was mere inches from the door when a burly security guard with a bald head and mean eyes grabbed me.
“Ma’am, you’ll have to come with me. Pulling the alarm with no cause is a crime.” I blinked up at him and tried for an innocent expression, but his stern expression never wavered. “I’m sorry, but you’re kind of hard to miss with those legs and that hair.”
Fair enough. My hair did stand out like a beacon. I nodded and was getting ready to go quietly with the man and face my punishment when the guy suddenly put his fingers to his ear, straining to hear something coming over a radio hidden there. He dropped his hold on my arm and started to move the opposite direction of the crowd. I watched his retreating back as he yelled to another guard, “We have a problem at the front. Possible shooting, armed assailants. All hands on deck.”
I refused to freak out over the fact that Lane was out there with those armed men. He was trusting me to do my part, and I had to have faith that he would do his. I ran through the door, rudely pushing past looky-loos and dawdlers. I almost knocked over the woman in neon, offering her a slight smile of apology, but didn’t stop until I was outside. I kept to the middle of the milling crowd, moving slowly and methodically until I reached the fringe of the group. Once I had room to move, I jogged toward the closest casino. My frantic pace and wild-eyed look got me a few strange glances, but I slipped in mostly unnoticed due to the commotion next door.
I had no idea where to start looking for Bauer. Luckily, he found me instead. I was weaving through the slot machines and blackjack tables in the direction of the lobby when I was suddenly tackled from the side. Bony arms wrapped around me, and we nearly went to the ground in the aftermath of Bauer’s enthusiasm.
“I’m so glad you made it. I thought it was all over when that security guard grabbed you.”
I hugged him back briefly but urged him to keep moving. “Were you waiting for me? I told you not to do that. I almost didn’t make it.”
He pulled on my hand and forced me to change direction, guiding us away from the casino and the entrance of the hotel.
“This casino is attached to a mall. There’s another entrance on the side of the building not facing the Strip. I already sent Lane a text and told him to meet us there. It’ll be less busy than the main entrance.” He started moving purposely in the opposite direction I was planning on going.
“How do you know that?” I followed him, casting furtive looks over my shoulder every few minutes to make sure no one was following us.
“I stopped to look at the directory while I was waiting for you.” He turned to look at me, and I wished he didn’t have the glasses on so I could see his eyes. The kid was hard to read without the dark shades offering him one more shield to hide behind. “It’s habit. I always need to have more than one way out of a room.” Of course, he did, because nine times out of ten when he was in a room, he was paid to be there by someone who wanted to use him and hurt him.
His words had me grinding my teeth together and hating every adult in his life who had failed him. I thought I hated the ones who had hurt me, but somehow my anger was twice as hot and doubly dangerous when it came to this lonely, abandoned kid.
When we got to the exit of the mall, Lane was already there in the idling truck. I wanted to cry seeing that he was in one piece and unharmed. His expression was fierce and focused as I hustled Bauer into the cab, following him up in a rush. I practically jumped across the center console in order to drop fevered kisses all over the side of Lane’s handsome face. He let out a breath that had his shoulders shaking. His hands lifted off the steering wheel and tangled in my hair. His lips hit mine with reverence and so much relief that I felt it push against all the fear and adrenaline that was coursing through me.
I returned the kiss with a passionate one of my own, and when I pulled back, he was already moving the truck forward. None of us said anything as Lane navigated the complicated Vegas traffic. It was a snarled mess made even worse by the hectic goings-on at the casino we’d just fled.
It wasn’t until we crossed into the tiny corner of Arizona that we had to get through on the way to Utah that Lane decided to break the silence. He told us that we needed to stop for gas. He didn’t tell us that when we stopped, he was going to take a couple minutes and call for backup. I knew he didn’t want to send Bauer running, but we were dealing with things neither one of us had any experience with, and our lack of knowledge could get everyone killed.
When he told me he was calling Ten to ask her to meet us in Denver, I didn’t object. The woman was a forest ranger now, but at one point in time, she worked for the FBI. She was a badass, through and through. Tennyson was a bloodhound when it came to finding missing people. If anyone could track down the legendary Mikey, it was her. Lane also wanted to call Webb’s brother Wyatt. I had no clue what a DEA agent could do for us, but I figured he might know someone who could help. As long as everyone agreed that the priority was keeping Bauer safe and out of the hands of the people who bought and sold him, I told him to call whomever he had to. I felt bad going behind the kid’s back, but if the end result was Bauer being protected from the people who hurt him, I would deal with the guilt. After all, he was a child, and it was about time someone made some decisions that were in his best interests.
I distracted him with a mini shopping spree in the gas station. We grabbed what seemed to be one of everything off the junk food aisle including Lane’s precious Funyuns. I also bought him a pair of cheap sunglasses so I could confiscate mine. He seemed so appreciative of the cheap gift that it twisted my already sideways heart into more knots.
He was quiet the entire time we were in the convenience store, and it took me a minute to realize his demure demeanor was due more to the truckers coming in and out than the events back at the casino. Bauer was no stranger to out of the way stops and long, lonely trips on the highway. It didn’t occur to me that these types of places probably held some pretty shitty memories for him, just like every time I was forced to return to the reservation and to my mom’s trailer did for me. It was a place I never wanted to visit, old ghosts found in haunts of places best left buried. I had to force myself to go when I wanted to check on my sister. I bet it was the same for Bauer.
Lane also dropped a quick call home to let Cy know what was going on. I could tell by Lane’s side of the conversation that his older brother wasn’t happy with the dangerous turn of events. From the sounds of things, Cy was trying to talk Lane into forgetting about Denver and head straight home. He wanted us back at the ranch, and he didn’t care if we brought the kid with us. I could hear Lane explaining that he didn’t want to betray Bauer, that he promised the kid he would help him get to his brother, but Cy didn't seem to be moved by his younger brother's dedication and loyalty. I understood where the oldest Warner brother was coming from. It had been Cy’s responsibility to take over the ranch and his brother's care when Boyd died. He’d dropped everything, left his life behind to do what was expected of him, and the last thing he wanted was one of his younger siblings out there fighting this kind of battle alone. It was Cy’s job to be the roadblock against all the bad shit that was bound to come looking for boys as wild and wicked as the Warners were.
Lane eventually told Cy he had to go. I heard the other man practically yelling as his little brother hung up on him. Bauer seemed amused by the exchange but his gratitude at knowing Lane wasn’t going to change the plan and stop him from getting to Denver and his brother was palpable. Slowly but surely, he was letting us get around the walls he’d been forced to hide behind to keep his sanity and any remnants left of his soul alive.
I offered to drive for part of the way and was surprised when Lane took me up on the offer. Those Warner boys rarely let anyone near their precious trucks, even the women they loved. It was another move proving that he trusted me, that he was ready to give me all that he had. We were no longer former friends trying to pretend we hadn’t turned into adversaries along the way. We were friends who turned into lovers—lovers who were going to do their very best to be each other’s forever. We weren’t shoulda, woulda, coulda. We were happening now. Finally, it was our time.
The drive through Utah was both beautiful and boring. There were some stunning rock formations the first part of the drive, but halfway, the road turned as long and blank as the drive out of the desert in California. Both Lane and Bauer dozed off leaving me alone with my thoughts. I tried my best to keep my mind off what we were walking into once we hit the Mile-High city. I wanted Bauer’s brother to be everything he needed and the young hero he described, but I had my doubts. I was sure the young man loved his brother, after all, he’d put himself between Bauer and his father’s misplaced anger time and time again. But the reality of helping someone who had been through the kinds of things Bauer had been through, I wasn’t sure Mikey was ready for that. I didn’t know how much he knew about his brother's past, but I was betting Bauer hadn’t been completely honest with Mikey about what he’d done to simply survive.
I knew there were parts of my ordeal I refused to share with anyone. It was easier that way. I didn’t want my old experiences to taint the way people saw me. I didn’t want pity, I wanted a chance to prove that I was nothing like my mother. I wanted a shot to show the world I was the woman Boyd Warner allowed me the time and space to become.
And I wanted that same opportunity for Bauer.
The weather was gross when we got into Colorado. Windy as hell and raining so hard it was difficult to see out the windshield. I gladly handed driving responsibilities back to Lane and tried to catch a quick nap. The howling wind was noisy enough that I thought it was going to be impossible to rest, but the next thing I knew Lane was shaking me awake. It was dark outside, and the clock on the dashboard told me that it was closing in on midnight. The skyscrapers of downtown Denver were lit up all bright and shiny, and it was still raining out. Lane was asking Bauer for directions to his brother’s place, and we both cringed when he rattled off an address that was recognizably in a less than desirable part of the city. Certain streets ran through parts of Denver that we all knew to avoid when we traveled to the big bad city…well, big and bad for those of us from small-town Wyoming.
“Is your family from Denver?” Lane asked the question innocently enough, but I could see him watching Bauer in the rearview mirror.
The teenager was closed in on himself, arms wrapped around his legs as he stared unseeingly out the window.
“No. I’m from the coast.” It didn’t go unnoticed that he didn’t mention which coast he was from. “The city I’m from has a really nice part and a really, really bad part. I grew up on the dividing line between those two places. Sometimes it was scary. Most of the time it was a typical suburban upbringing complete with a white picket fence.”
“Mikey always loved the mountains. He’s an avid snowboarder. He always talked about going to college in Denver when he was old enough. It’s so cool he managed to make that dream come true.” He sounded so wistful I could practically feel the longing for something normal like the chance at college in his tone.
“Bauer”—Lane hesitated for a second before plowing on— “Are you sure your parents never reported you missing or as a runaway? Maybe your mother had a change of heart along the way.”
The teenager snorted and shook his head violently back and forth. “No way. I got picked up for solicitation in San Francisco and again in LA. When they ran me through the system, nothing came up. They had to call my folks before dropping me in foster care over and over. My parents don’t give a damn about what happens to me. The only person who cares about me is Mikey.”
“Not the only person, kid. Try and remember that.” Lane never raised his voice or sounded frustrated. He was the quiet reassurance, the steady, unwavering strength that someone as skittish and gun shy as Bauer needed.
Bauer simply turned and looked out the window, a look of doubt laced with a sliver of hope on his face that spoke volumes. If he only knew the hell we’d both been through to get to this moment, he’d truly understand that someone can come out of the depths of hell and onto the other side if they had people worth fighting for on the other side.
We lapsed back into silence for the rest of the ride to the rundown apartment complex off of East Colfax. Lane took his time trying to find a place to park. It took me a minute to realize he was circling the block to make sure we weren’t being followed. I was pretty sure the woman standing on the corner around from where Lane finally parked was a prostitute, and there was no question that the guy sitting on cracked concrete steps in front of the building was dealing drugs. He eyed us up and down as we moved in unison to the front door. There was no security door. There was a busted-up intercom that Bauer bypassed, pushing his way into the complex with Lane and me hot on his heels. I could feel the heat of Lane’s hand on my lower back. It was reassuring when the situation was anything but. The elevator was broken, so we climbed three flights of stairs until we reached apartment 3F. Bauer took a deep breath before knocking, and I watched him deflate when there was no response. He knocked again, this time calling his brother’s name and lifting a foot to kick the wood.
Lane reached around the redheaded teenager and put his hand on the knob. The cheap door swung open with barely a touch.
Bauer fell back a step, and I instinctively reached out to catch him. I heard Lane swear and held the teenager up as he started to collapse into my arms. I peeked around Lane’s broad shoulders and couldn’t stop my whispered “Oh, fuck” that slipped out.
The apartment was dingy and small. It was decorated like any straight, eighteen-year-old male would decorate with lots of posters of bands, beer, and breasts. The furniture was obviously second hand and mismatched in a way that made my head hurt. However, none of that held a candle to the fact that the place had been trashed. Absolutely demolished. It looked like everything Mikey owned had been shredded and dumped in a pile in the living room. It was a mess.
There was no sign of Mikey anywhere.
We were too late, and Bauer was going to break down.
I held onto him even tighter, determined to keep it and him together as Lane and I exchanged knowing looks.
We were standing right on the fault line as things shifted from bad to worse and the quake that rumbled under our feet was ominous and worrying.