Chapter 32

She thought she’d sleep better at Sam’s place but instead she spent most of the night watching him sleep. He looked so peaceful in the glow of moonlight that filtered in the window. How many nights would she get to spend with him if she moved to London? It would become an exception rather than the norm. Maybe that would make their time together even sweeter. Maybe not.

She was exhausted when she walked into the barn on Friday morning and was thankful they only had three dogs staying. It was nice and quiet. Unfortunately one of them was the mischievous Pixie who belonged to Graham, the neighbour up the road. Since Josie had lost her on that first day, she’d always been vigilant with her. But with her head in the clouds when she opened the stable door, Pixie slipped right past her. The barn door was open and Pixie was off like a shot. Josie made it outside in time to see her scale the fence and disappear down into the valley.

It was hard to summon the energy for a chase, but Josie set off briskly in the direction Pixie had gone. Tears came to her eyes almost immediately. She was too tired and emotional to deal with a lost dog. There was no sign of her at Sam’s house. That’s where Josie looked first, hoping she’d done the same as last time. Sam had already left for work so she couldn’t even ask him for help.

For almost an hour, she wandered the hills and fields, calling out to Pixie and feeling completely defeated. Finally, she headed for home to tell Annette she’d lost the dog. She kept her head down and only noticed Annette sitting on the patio when she was almost there. Pixie was sitting on her lap.

Josie attempted a smile but her eyes filled with tears and her chin twitched madly. She sat at the table and put her head in her hands. Sobs wracked her body.

She felt Annette’s hand on her shoulder. “I’m sorry,” Josie said, her chest heaving as she fought against the sobs.

“She came back,” Annette said. “No harm done.”

“It’s not the first time I’ve lost her.”

“I know. And I’m guessing that’s not really what you’re so upset about either. You’ve been in a funny mood for days.”

“Did Sam tell you I lost her before?”

“No.” Annette chuckled. “I saw out the window. That first day.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Pixie always comes back. And I thought it would be good for you to lose a dog on the first day. You’d be extra careful.”

Josie sniffed. “I’m not very good at this job.”

“Don’t be silly.” Annette seemed genuinely surprised by the remark. “You’re great at it.”

“The dogs don’t listen to me. I nearly trip over them about twenty times a day. I thought I’d get better but I’m not. I’m just no good at it.”

“Of course you’re getting better with the dogs. You just don’t notice because it’s gradual. Is this what you’re so upset about?”

She shook her head and brushed tears from her cheeks. “I’ve been offered a job. In London.”

“Ah.” Annette inhaled deeply and then shot Josie a sympathetic look. “You’re leaving me?”

“I feel terrible.” More tears appeared. “But it might be really good for me. I want the job. I don’t want to leave you. Or Sam. I don’t want to hurt Sam.”

Annette patted her hand. “Sam loves you. He’ll want whatever’s best for you. Whatever makes you happy.”

“You need me here, though …”

“I like having you here,” Annette said. “But I’ll survive. You don’t have to worry about me.”

“It’s the acting job,” Josie said. “The TV show I worked on before. I’m just so torn. It feels like whatever I decide will be wrong.”

“Nope,” Annette said brightly. “Whatever you decide will be right.”

 

***

 

By the time Josie spoke to Michaela that afternoon, she was adamant there was no way she could leave Annette. When she’d transferred an online booking from the computer to Annette’s old-fashioned diary earlier, and replied to comments on social media, she was reminded that Annette definitely couldn’t manage the place on her own. She also wasn’t physically fit enough to walk the dogs. It was almost always Josie who did that now. She couldn’t stand the thought of a stranger coming in to help.

She slinked up to her bedroom when her phone rang and closed the door behind her.

“I thought you’d have called me by now,” Michaela said quickly. “You suddenly think you’re some big star who can keep me waiting?” Her words were jokey, but Josie detected a hint of annoyance in her tone too.

Josie stood in the window, gazing out over the fields. “I needed time to think about it.”

“What’s to think about? It’s exactly what you want. I can’t actually believe how lucky you are that they’ve requested you back. You know they specifically requested you, don’t you?”

“I thought they were asking all the supporting artists to come back?”

“They’re asking them all. But they specifically asked for the same barmaid. And they asked whether you’d be willing to develop the role.”

“Did they?” Josie asked, sceptically.

“Do you think I’m making it up?” Michaela sounded indignant.

It had definitely crossed Josie’s mind. “I don’t know.” She didn’t know why she was hesitating. All she had to do was say no thanks and get off the phone. Why was she stalling? “Can I have more time to think about it?”

“I need an answer before you get off the phone,” Michaela said. “And if you say no there’s no changing your mind later. I can’t believe you even have to think about this. It’s an amazing opportunity. Do you know how many people would kill for this? I spend half my time on the phone to people like you, begging me to find them a job. You were one of them not so long ago. Now I have a job for you and you’re not sure! What’s going on?”

“My situation changed.” She moved to sit on the bed, her gaze landing on the flowery wallpaper. “It’s complicated now.”

“I need an answer,” Michaela said. There was a tapping in the background as though she was drumming her nails on the desk.

“I suppose I have to say no then.” As soon as Josie said it, she panicked. It was like flipping a coin to make a decision and realising what you want as soon as the coin landed. “Wait,” she said, terrified it was a final answer sort of situation and she’d just sealed her fate.

“What should I tell them?” Michaela asked impatiently.

“Tell them I’ll take it. I want the job.”