I feel like I’ve been asleep for a week when I start to come to. It’s like I’m surrounded by fog; nothing’s quite making sense. That is, until I turn over to find Liam and my face presses against the pillow. Sucking in a sharp breath, my hand comes up to the sore spot as memories of the events of yesterday slam into me.

Sitting up so fast my head spins, I look down to the other side of the bed. It’s empty. My heart drops as I remember how angry he was. How his body shook with rage as he held me to him. His white-knuckle grip on the wheel as he drove us home. The darkness of his eyes that told me how badly he wanted to cause someone, namely Griff, some serious damage.

Those images eventually fade, and instead I’m reminded of how gentle he was with me despite the rage flowing through his bloodstream.

Tears sting my eyes as I replay everything from yesterday and I realise how bloody stupid the whole thing was. I realised my mistake the second our eyes met. I’ve no doubt that if he wasn’t stopped, he would have gone all the way and left me there for dead. I’d bet my life on it.

I’m never going to be able to repay Liam for what he did. How he even knew what I was doing is still beyond me. I didn’t tell anyone, yet when I needed him, there he was. My knight in shining armour.

It doesn’t escape my attention that the two of us have a lot of talking to do. I’ve kept him at arm’s length with everything that happened because I didn’t want to hurt him by giving him the details, but I’m realising that was probably the wrong thing to do. I owe him the truth.

Eventually, I drag my weary body out of bed and into the shower. I very gently wash my hair before pulling on a pair of leggings and a hoodie I’ve stolen from Liam. Bringing the fabric up to my nose, I breathe him in. His smell helps to ground me and reminds me that I really am safe now. Griff’s back in the place he never should have left, I’ve seen with my own eyes that David will eventually be okay, and I can now truly get on with my life. Cardiff and everything that happened there is behind me.

“Hey, I thought I heard movement,” Liam says, poking his head into the room.

“Hey.” Dropping my hairbrush to the dresser, I get up and walk towards him. My hands land on his rough cheeks before my lips press against his. I expect him to kiss me back but when he doesn’t, disappointment washes through me.

“Liam?” I ask, my eyebrows knotted together, “What’s wrong?”

“You need to come downstairs.” His voice is all matter-of-fact and doesn’t do anything to shift the dread sitting heavy in my stomach.

“W…why?”

“There’re people here to see you.” His eyes give nothing away. They’re hard in a way I’ve never experienced before. I knew he was angry yesterday, but I really wasn’t expecting this.

“Who?”

“Just get downstairs as soon as you can.”

He’s gone before I get to ask the question I really want to ask—if we’re okay. Although if what just happened was anything to go by, I don’t think I really want to know the answer.

After brushing my wet hair, I pull it up into a messy bun, take a deep breath, and head out to see what, or whom, I’m going to find waiting for me.

My guess is Nicole. She’s going to want to know everything about yesterday, and she’ll probably rip me a new one for being so reckless. But I’d have thought she’d have just invited herself up to tear into me.

“What the fuck?” I ask as I round the corner into the living room and find it full of people.

My mum turns at my voice and I see concern mixed with disappointment fill her features. She must push aside the latter because, in seconds, she’s up on her feet and heading my way.

“What on earth have you gotten yourself in to, Olivia?” she asks as she wraps her arms around my shoulders and pulls me into her. Being in her embrace is comforting, but I could think of someone else’s arms I’d rather be wrapped in right now.

Mum must feel that I don’t relax into it, because when she pulls back, it’s with concern.

Pulling my gaze away, I look over her shoulder to find my dad on the edge of his seat like he’s about to jump me, my brother Ryan, his wife Molly, Abbi and Jax all sat staring at me, waiting for answers.

I want the floor to swallow me up. Other than telling Abbi when they appeared last weekend, I’ve done everything I can to avoid telling my family the details of my life in Cardiff. But it looks like my time avoiding the truth has come to an end, and if the tension in Liam’s shoulders is anything to go by, I’d say this is all his doing.

“Why don’t you come and sit down, sweetheart? You’ve got some explaining to do.”

Groaning to myself, I do as Dad suggests while Liam disappears. I want to call him back—he needs to hear this as much as they all do, but he seems to have decided against it.

“Liv?” Molly prompts, grabbing my hand and giving it an encouraging squeeze.

I tip my head up to the ceiling and pull in a lungful of air, thinking about where I should start.

I stare directly ahead as I tell my story. I don’t leave anything out as I explain about David’s addiction, his brother’s issues, and everything that’s happened for me to end up here. There are gasps of surprise, cries of horror, and a few grunts of anger from Ryan and Dad, but I don’t allow any of them to stop me. I’ve held off doing this, but now the words are falling from my lips, I can’t stop them.

When I eventually get to the end of my nightmare and look to the people around me, they all look a little traumatised and I feel bad for just laying it all out for them. I know I should have told them all a long time ago that things weren’t good, but I was hoping to avoid the looks they’re giving me.

“That was a fucking stupid thing to do yesterday, Liv,” Ryan snaps. When I look over, I see the same anger in his eyes as Liam’s.

“I know,” I whisper. “But it’s done now, and he’s locked up. I feel like I can breathe again, knowing he’s not able to hurt anyone else.”

My words don’t help relax him at all; neither does whatever Molly whispers in his ear.

Hours later, Molly manages to convince Ryan that I’m okay and that they need to get home for Lois, but everyone else stays put. They’ve already explained that Lilly’s husband Lucas has arranged rooms at his hotel. I want to feel grateful that they’re here for me, but all I can think about is Liam. He’s not come back, and all I want to do is find out if we’re okay.

I see no sign of Liam, or BJ for that matter, for the rest of the weekend. On the other hand, I can’t seem to get rid of my family. I love that they’re here—it has been too long since we spent any time together, and I feel awful for wishing they’d leave, but I can’t help it. I need to find Liam.

By the time Sunday afternoon rolls around, my parents eventually announce that they need to make a move, quickly followed by Abbi and Jax. I promise them all that I won’t shut them out anymore, and Mum does her best to convince me to go home with them. They don’t seem to understand that my heart belongs here, but then, why would they? It’s not like Liam really gave them a chance to get to know him and understand why he’s so important to me.

The house is deadly silent after I wave them all off, and I hate it. I try sitting and watching TV but I’m too anxious to stay still, so I grab my cleaning supplies and get to work. It’s been a few days since I blitzed the place, after all.

“Oh hey, how’s it going?” BJ asks when he finds me halfway up the stairs with the vacuum in my hands.

“Where is he?”

“Giving you space.”

“What? Why?”

“Fucked if I know. He said something about your family being here and giving you some time together, then he disappeared.”

“You haven’t seen him, either?”

“No, but I spent most of the weekend with this redhead. We kinda lost track of time, if you know what I mean.” His eyebrows wiggle and my cheeks flush.

“You’re a dog, you know that, right?”

“Just sowing my wild oats while I’m young.” I narrow my eyes at him. “What?”

“Nothing. I just think you’re full of shit. Is this really what you want? A different woman every night?”

“Uh, yeah! Why would I want anything else?”

“If you say so.”

“This little chat was enlightening and all…but I really need to shower. That bird’s perfume was—”

“Just go,” I say, moving the vacuum and myself out of the way.

“He’ll be back when he’s ready,” BJ shouts down to me as he gets to his room. “I think what you did affected him more than he’ll ever admit.”

He’s gone before I get a chance to respond. Sitting down on the step, I think about BJ’s words and feel terrible. I was so focused on getting rid of Griff that I didn’t really put much thought into what could have happened and how it would have affected the people around me.

I wait all night, expecting Liam to come home, but the only person to come to the house is Nicole, who does exactly as I was expecting and gives me an earful about my actions and helpfully reminds me about how mad I was at Liam for going after Griff. She’s right, of course. I refused to talk to him for over a week because he could have got himself hurt, but I’ve just done exactly the same thing—no, what I did was worse. I didn’t take two other guys with me as back-up. I went in there alone with just the hope the police would be fast as my get-out plan.

Groaning, I throw myself back on the sofa and stare at the ceiling. I don’t know what to do. He won’t answer my calls, my texts are unread, and I’ve no idea where he is, other than the suspicion that Nic was lying to me and that he’s stayed at her place.

“Well?” BJ asks all expectantly the following Friday. Raising my eyebrows at him, I wait for him to continue. “A happy birthday would be nice.”

“Oh my god! I had no idea. Happy birthday!”

“A little kiss wouldn’t go amiss,” he says with a wink.

“Ugh, pig. A hug is the best I can do.”

“Done,” he says with a wide smile as he pulls me to him and wraps me in a bear hug. I think it’s more for me than it is him. The comfort of it has me fighting a giant lump in my throat. “He’ll be back soon,” he whispers in my ear before pulling away.

Every morning, I listen to him on the radio and pray that he’s going to come and find me after, but every day I’m disappointed.

I don’t start my job for another two weeks, and without him I feel like I’m losing my mind. Nicole’s tried to keep me company but she’s got her own life to be getting on with. BJ’s been home, but usually he has company of the female variety to hold his attention. I’m starting to wonder if I should have taken my parents’ offer of going back with them, because right now, this place I thought was my solace is making me miserable.

“It’s free-for-all Friday, or whatever it’s called,” BJ says suddenly, confusing the fuck out of me. He takes pity on me as I stare at him blankly. “On the radio. You can request a song.”

“Oh, right, that.”

“Just saying,” he says with a shrug. “It worked last time.”

He has a point, but talking to Liam through a random song is the last thing I really want to be doing. I just want the chance to talk to him like a normal person.

“So what’re the plans for your big day?” I ask, trying to steer the conversation away from me.

“Strip club, obviously!” BJ rolls his eyes like I shouldn’t have even had to ask.

“Of course. Silly me. So, you’re going to be gone all night, then?”

“And all morning, I hope.” I groan. “You’ve got the house to yourself. Go crazy. Run around naked or whatever it is chicks do when guys aren’t around.”

“Uh…not that,” I mutter, but I’m grateful they’re not partying here tonight. A houseful of drunk guys and even drunker girls is not my idea of fun. “Have a good night, though.”

“Oh, we will.”

BJ disappears after getting himself a coffee, and I once again find myself alone with just Liam’s voice to keep me company.

I stand, leaning against the counter with my coffee warming my hands, thinking about BJ’s comment about Liam’s free-for-all Friday playlist.

I grab my phone before I think too much more about it and search for a song, but I’m not like him. Music doesn’t talk to me in the same way as it does him. He spends all his time listening to songs and figuring out their lyrics, understanding their meanings.

It’s not long before I feel utterly useless. Music isn’t really my thing. Yeah, I know the words to plenty of songs, but they don’t really go in. I don’t remember lyrics like he does to just pick one to tell him everything I want it to.

After spending way too long listening to songs I’ve never heard of, trying to find just the right one, I give up and go back to my first option. I Google the number for the station before I change my mind, then I give Liam’s producer my request and the reason for it.

And then I wait.

And wait.

I’m a nervous wreck each time a song comes to an end, thinking he might play mine next, but as his show nears its end I can only assume mine was one of the requests they never got to.

That is, until ten minutes before the end. I’m just about to get up and shower when his words stop me.

“Our next request comes from…Olivia,” he stutters, and I can picture him reading the rest of my request. “She’s hoping to spend the weekend making up with her boyfriend.” After clearing his throat and making some comment about him being a lucky guy, he hits play on my song. Justin Beiber’s ‘Sorry’. It might not have the deepest lyrics, but it pretty much said everything I needed it to. Nerves knot my stomach as I consider what he might think of my choice and I start second-guessing my actions. Bloody BJ and his stupid idea.

“Last one for today then, and it’s my choice. I hope you all have a fantastic weekend. I’ll be back to get you ready to start your working week on Monday morning.”

My heart threatens to pound out of my chest as I wait for his song choice to start. I recognise Philip George’s ‘Alone No More’ immediately, and to start with I think it’s a bit of a weird choice. That is, until he starts singing about being in love. Then, my knees buckle and I find myself on the sofa.

Did he choose this to tell me…Is this a coincidence and his choice has nothing to do with me? Or is he really trying to…

My heart races as I try not to allow it to run away with me. It could just be a random song choice. It could have nothing to do with me at all. I’m probably just thinking too much into it.

I’m still staring at the wall, lost in my thoughts, when BJ comes back down some time later. He’s freshly showered and ready to hit the town, even though it’s not even 11am yet.

“Well, that went well.”

“W…what?”

“Your song choice and his response.”

“You think?” I ask sceptically.

“Yeah.” He looks at me like I’m crazy. “We were just listening to the same thing, right? You basically heard my best friend declare is love for you live on radio?”

“Did he, though?” I hate sounding vulnerable and needy, but I can’t help it. I’m already driving myself nuts with this; I need someone else’s opinion.

“You really needed a song to tell you that? He’s had it bad for you since the moment he saw you.” My mouth drops open but no sound comes out. “Liv, seriously. He’s been waiting years for ‘the one’, then you turn up and it’s like his world’s been tilted. He’s totally in love with you.”

I stare at BJ with wide eyes and a gawping mouth as his words race around my head.

“You really didn’t know?” he asks with a laugh.

“I just…I don’t know.” Sagging back against the sofa, suddenly feeling exhausted, I let out a long breath. But it seems BJ hasn’t finished.

“You love him too, by the way. And when he’s ready and comes back, you’re going to tell him and then run off into the sunset together. I can see little Liams running around very soon.”

“Whoa,” I say holding my hands up. “He’s not even talking to me at this point. Don’t you think you’re running away with yourself?”

“Nah. When you know, you know.”

“And you know that how?” I ask, hoping to get a little insight into the mystery that is BJ, but he just shrugs before telling me that he knows what he’s talking about.

“Just promise me something?” he asks, turning back as he heads towards the door.

“Sure.”

“Don’t fuck it up. Life’s a long time to live with regrets.” Then, he’s gone.

I eventually manage to drag my confused arse up to my room to get showered and dressed for the day. Feeling restless and not wanting to sit around the house waiting for Liam to possibly return, I slip on my flip-flops, grab my bag and start walking. I’ve no idea if she’s working, but when I get down to the beach, I poke my head inside the shack. The place is packed and it’s only a couple of seconds before I spot a harassed looking Nicole taking some customers’ food orders over.

Taking the one empty stool at the bar, I sit and wait for her to come over while eavesdropping on the two women next to me discussing a guy one of them has been seeing. It’s nice not to have to think about my own life for a few minutes as the woman gives her friend a play-by-play of the previous night.

“Oh my god, it’s crazy in here today. Freya rang in sick and she was meant to be working a long shift.” After redoing her ponytail, Nicole sets about making a round of drinks.

“I can help,” I offer.

“You serious?”

“Of course. I’ve never waited tables before, mind you.”

“You’ll be fine. It’s easy. Go put your bag in the office and I’ll find you an apron.”

Jumping off the bar stool, I do as she said, feeling good about having something to do today. When I return, Nic wastes no time tying the fabric around my waist and shoving a notepad at me.

I’m totally out of my depth. I’ve no idea what’s on the menu other than the brie and bacon panini I always order, but it’s not long before I find myself in the swing of things. Glancing over at Nic, she smiles, looking much more relaxed than when I first arrived.

“I’m guessing Dec’s with BJ?” I ask when there’s a bit of a lull.

“Yeah. He monopolises their time for the entire day every year.”

“What are they doing?”

“No idea, but every year they apparently end up in a strip club in the city. BJ keeps the plans secret.”

By the time Nicole locks up for the night, my feet are throbbing and I’m in need of a nice long shower and a large glass of wine.

“Drink?” she asks, turning the main lights off.

“Can you read my mind?”

With a laugh, she grabs a bottle from the fridge and pours us both a generous glassful.

She carries them over to where I’ve flopped down on the sofa that looks out over the beach beyond.

“Want to talk about it?” she asks after I let out a long sigh.

“I just feel lost. Things were so good between us. I felt my life was turning a corner, and now it’s like I’m back at square one again. I’m half tempted to go to my parents’—”

“Don’t you dare,” she warns, turning her narrowed eyes to me. “You know he would hunt you down and drag you back if you did, anyway.”

“Would he? I’ve not seen him since last weekend, let alone spoken to him. For all I know, he’s done with me. Every time I picture him, I just see his anger and the dejected look on his face when I visited David. I was trying to put an end to all of that. I know I may not have gone the best way about it, but I never intended on it ruining what I have here.”

“That boy’s head over heels for you, and you know it.”

“So everyone keeps telling me, but it’s kinda hard to believe when it’s not coming from him.”

“It will.” She’s full of a confidence I could do with a little of. “Just give him time. He’ll be back.”

“We’ll see,” I mutter, staring back out at the dark night, praying that she’s right.