Chapter 24
Jordan
The next few weeks brought long, arduous hours at the office as we prepared for the IPO roadshow. I was here for twelve to fifteen hours a day, arriving at seven in the morning and leaving at nine or ten every night. I’d worked those kinds of hours before, but this was different. It seemed sort of hollow and meaningless, and the harder I worked, the more I realized that my heart wasn’t completely in it like it had been.
April was here most of the time, too, which made things all the more difficult. She arrived at her usual start time—I’d noticed in Canada that she wasn’t a morning person—but she always stayed late and was one of the last people out of the building each day.
Sometimes Daddy Dearest was here as well, and it was interesting to watch them together. I puzzled at the guarded way with which she dealt with him. I wondered if she counted him among the list of men in her life who had hurt her, who had let her down. I couldn’t help but wonder if I was on that list as well.
Her demeanor toward me could best be described as coolly polite. No more joking around, no conveniently placed middle fingers indicating that she wasn’t going to take my shit. Even when I tried to get a rise out of her, she gave me the same tight, courteous smile.
And I hated it.
One night, on a particularly late night the week before we were to hit the road, Mia arrived with a stack of take-out from a nearby Mexican place. She wanted us all to sit in the break room and have a decent meal—together. And that all included Adam, Mia, David, his daughter, me, and a couple of other officers and their assistants, along with Kat, Mia’s friend who worked in playtesting.
The two of them were talking about going down to the warehouse and getting the prototype equipment out to play with it. Mia turned to April, who sat next to me, and said, “You want to come? We’ll show you how it works. You could use it for your project.”
April hesitated mid-chew, her eyes lighting up. “That would be—”
“I’m sure you’ve got work to do, right?” her dad interjected. As if he wanted me to confirm it, his dark blue eyes—which were eerily like hers—flicked to me. Screw that. As her boss, I’d be the judge of what work she needed to get done.
“She’s been working hard. She could use a break. Go for it if you want to, Weiss,” I said to her.
But April’s eyes were on her dad, her features clouding. She blinked and then turned back to Mia. “Maybe if you’re still there in an hour or so. I do have to finish up some stuff for Jordan.”
Mia nodded, getting up from the table. “Join us whenever you want, April. We’ll be there until I can pry this one away from his desk,” she said with a wave of her hand in Adam’s direction. “Hopefully before midnight.”
“Another hour,” he said, capturing her hand and kissing the back of it.
“I’ll believe it when I see it.” She stuck out her tongue at him.
“Care to make it interesting?” He raised his brows at her.
“I always make it interesting.” With a cheeky grin, she turned to leave.
David watched her and Kat go with a smile. “You’ve got a winner,” he said to Adam with a nod in Mia’s direction. “I like her.”
Adam smiled but didn’t say anything as he forked the last of his Spanish rice into his mouth.
“So when’s the happy day?”
“We haven’t set a date yet. She just started medical school.”
I glanced at April, who was watching her father and Adam with a strange intensity. I wondered what was going through her head at that moment. What was the dynamic of their parent-child relationship? They didn’t seem particularly close, but she seemed to desperately want his approval. She’d been about to get up and go play with the girls before her father’s comment had stopped her. I wondered what kind of baggage was involved.
Another woman with Daddy issues, like with Cyndi. I seemed to attract those.
Of course, I had my own damn Daddy issues. I guess we all did.
“Smart woman, knows what she wants. Successful. Beautiful, too. You’ve got the complete package. You need to make that official soon before she figures out she’s getting the raw end of the deal,” David joked.
Adam threw his head back and laughed. “You were always good at taking me down a few pegs when I was getting too full of myself.”
“I was the best boss you ever had, admit it.”
Adam stood and wiped his mouth with a napkin before tossing it on the table. “You were the only boss I’ve ever had.”
David and Adam wandered back to his office, still laughing, while April watched them, absently gathering the paper plates and debris from the table and tossing them. I helped her collect the leftovers and put them in the fridge.
“You okay?”
She shrugged. “Yeah.”
She looked particularly fetching today in a short black skirt—barely long enough to be called professional attire—that came a few inches above her knees, a white, button-down blouse that hugged her luscious breasts, and shiny black patent Mary Janes with enough of a heel to emphasize the swell of her gorgeous calves.
I tried not to look too closely these days. It was pure torture to stare at what I couldn’t have. I supposed I could have called one of my paramours for a night of fun, but to what end?
By default, I guess I was again observing Friar Jordan’s New Law even if I’d shattered that fucker all to pieces—and in various different positions and locations in between April’s extremely soft and supple thighs.
The hot memory of it had me sporting a semi as we made our way back to my office. It didn’t help that she walked ahead of me, giving me no choice but to study the sway of that pleated skirt against the back of her legs. It was so fucking unfair that I couldn’t have her again.
“You seem…upset,” I said, mostly to distract myself from my wayward thoughts.
She glanced in the direction of Adam’s office, where the door was open and Adam and her father were bent over a computer screen having some sort of intense discussion about the business plan.
“No. You’re just mistaking my sexual frustration for something else,” she quipped as she sauntered into my office. I almost swallowed my own tongue.
I hesitated before following her inside, leaving the door wide open. Just to be on the safe side. Immediately, I got back to my pre-dinner task, which was a frame-by-frame screening of the latest version of the roadshow video while adding my last comments for any edits needed.
April was in the middle of revising my slides for the banker presentation, but she seemed distracted, squirming in her seat and constantly catching my notice by doing so. I could hardly concentrate on what I was doing, too concerned about my damn hard-on and the way her breasts looked in that blouse.
“I’m warm in here, are you?” she finally said in a low voice.
“Huh?” I glanced up in time to see her unfasten two buttons on her blouse. I could now see the top of her lacy bra. Holy fuck.
“Maybe if I close the door in here so the warm air doesn’t come in from the atrium. I could turn down the thermostat, too.” She got up, shut the door and then pressed the lock. Holy hell.
Then she strutted—and there was no other way to describe the gait that made that pleated skirt dance against her sexy legs—to the thermostat and fiddled with it for a moment. I swallowed and focused on my computer screen, trying desperately to think about statistical finance or the market cap formula…hell, even baseball stats.
She sashayed back to her seat—thank God—but instead of sitting, she placed a foot on the seat of her chair, giving me a torrid view of the whole length of her leg. Holy Christ.
Then she reached under her skirt and tugged on the top of her thigh-high stockings. Edged with white lace, they looked like delicate, delicious cake frosting hugging her lush thighs. She had a dark beauty mark on the inside of her left thigh. I’d tasted it several times while we were in Vancouver. I wanted to taste it again. Without looking at me, she switched legs and did the same with the other one.
And now I was officially in pain from the swelling below the belt, my erect cock straining against my pants. I put my face in my hand, unable to look anymore.
“What’s wrong?” she said in a faux-innocent voice. “Do you have a headache?”
Nope, definitely not the location of the aching. Unless she was talking about the head below the belt. I didn’t say anything, scrubbing my palm across my eyes, the vision of her curvy legs forever burned in my mind. Why the hell was she torturing me like this? Or maybe this was her enacting a well-thought-out plan of revenge she’d had since the very beginning.
Nice timing. Her father was in the next room, separated by one office wall, for Christ’s sake. If she wanted to spell my doom, she couldn’t have picked a better opportunity.
When I looked up again, I almost jumped, seeing that she was now sitting on the edge of my desk right beside me, looking down with a knowing smile.
“I know an excellent cure for a headache and…that other problem you seem to be having,” she said with a meaningful look at my crotch.
I blew out a breath in exasperation. “Are you enjoying this?”
She smiled as she swung a leg back and forth. “I plan to. And I think you will too.”
I took a deep breath and let it out. Hard-on, be damned. “No. I am not doing this.”
She raised a brow and stuck her bottom lip out. “No? You don’t sound very committed to that.”
“Jesus, April, your dad—”
“We’re not talking about him. He’s very busy over there and so is everyone else. And that door is locked.” She bent over and ran a hand from my knee up the inside of my thigh, giving me a tentative, questioning glance.
When she reached my cock—now past the point of mere pain—I captured her delicate wrist and yanked her toward me. With a gasp, she stumbled off the desk and fell against my chest. She looked up, her mouth ready to be kissed.
“Miss Weiss, you are being inappropriate.”
“You love it when I’m inappropriate.”
“Fuck yeah, I do.”
Then she kissed me. “Mmm. I thought I’d miss the scruff. But I missed your hot mouth more.”
“You don’t fight fair.”
“Nobody said life was fair.” She kissed me again, her sleek tongue darting into my mouth. One hand slid down my stomach to cup my cock through my pants. I hissed against her mouth, threaded my fingers through her glossy hair and yanked her off my lap so that she was on her knees in front of me. Fuck yeah, indeed.
April held my gaze for a long time, the shock evaporating like foam seawater off the hard-packed beach sand. Understanding dawned in her ocean-blue eyes and she swallowed, licking those puffy pink lips. I reached out and traced the bottom one with my thumb.
“I want these gorgeous lips wrapped around my cock,” I ground out between my teeth.
Her eyes darkened with lust and she nodded, reaching for the fly on my khakis. After she undid my belt and unbuttoned my pants, I leaned back, watching as she dug into my boxers and pulled out my stiff, painful erection. She swallowed again, then ran her thumb up the bottom of my shaft and over the head. Fire crackled through my veins and my heartbeat drummed in my throat.
I was throbbing with need. She looked at me, as if reassuring herself that I was enjoying it. As if she had to be reassured of that. The thought almost made me laugh. “You’re so beautiful,” she muttered. “Every part of you.”
Her words had a new, more powerful effect on me, stroking me in places her fingers couldn’t reach. I had to have her—now. I leaned forward and reached around the back of her head, pulling her closer, pressing my cock to her lips. Her gorgeous mouth opened to take me in, and my chest felt like it was about to explode as her heat enveloped me.
I reached down, groping her breast through her shirt, and she let out a soft, muffled moan. My fingers slipped under her blouse, inside that lacy bra, where I rubbed and rolled her nipple until it came to a beaded, hard point under my attention. My cock surged in her mouth.
With a shudder, my eyes closed and I concentrated on her subtle movements as she slipped lower, taking more of me in. I hadn’t had sex in weeks, and working in such close proximity to her made me feel achingly deprived and tense. Now I was so over-the-top turned on, I feared this was going to be over before it even got started.
This moment transported me back to the time I’d first laid eyes on her, late last year during the intern orientation when they’d been brought around on a tour. The group had spent a few minutes in my office, and I distinctly remember her asking a question because my eyes landed on her beautiful face. Right there and then, those luscious lips had given me visions of her on her knees in front of me, pleasuring me just as she was now. She’d flashed that even, white smile that must have cost thousands at the orthodontist. I’d felt something then, a twinge of want, of lust. The interns were off-limits, sure. But it didn’t stop me from fantasizing about burying myself inside her every time I saw her.
Now here she was, sucking me off, her eyes never leaving mine as her mouth slid down, taking more of me in before slipping back up again, the suction increasing until I was about to start whimpering with the intensity of it.
Jesus fucking Christ. Where had she learned to do that? I didn’t know whether to be grateful to whoever it had been or to hunt him down and kill him for having been there before me. Pure, ice-cold pleasure spread out from my crotch, up my stomach and down my thighs. I was panting, my own breathing out of my control. I was going to come if she continued at this pace.
My hand darted out, holding her head still. “Slow down…” I muttered, and obediently she kept her head in place. But her tongue—that sinful tongue—was sliding all down the underside of my cock and back up again, lavishing it with her hot, wet attention.
All the air rushed out of my chest. With her head still pinned in place, I pressed my hips forward, thrusting into her mouth. She sucked in a breath of surprise through her nose until her breathing was cut off—by me. I froze, watching her, carefully noting if it was too much for her. But those eyes held fast to mine before her lids drooped and her hand thrust into my pants, stroking my balls. Slowly, I pulled back and pushed in again. I was seconds away from coming. I removed my hand to give her a chance to pull away if she wanted.
I really hope she didn’t want to.
“I’m going to come,” I groaned. A second later, her mouth slid down over me again, taking me in deeper than before. My head fell back and I stared at the ceiling, my eyes shut tight, that familiar pinch gathering at the base of my spine.
“April—fuck!”
Her mouth locked over me, sucking harder than before, and I came in hot, gasping waves. I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t think. And all I could feel was the molten pleasure of her mouth on me, sucking. Still sucking.
She held me there until the spasms faded and then slowly pulled away. I opened my heavy eyes, feeling completely wrung out. Holy shit.
“That…was fucking incredible.”
Without a word, she got up and walked into the bathroom. I heard the drawer open and the faucet turn on. But I still couldn’t move, so I sat there with my dick hanging out in the air like an idiot. My body felt relaxed, like I was boneless.
She came back into the office and handed me a washcloth to clean up. I thanked her and then finally got up to take my turn in the bathroom. When I returned, she was in her seat, buttoned up and arranged primly in front of her laptop, back to work as if nothing had happened.
I walked over to the door and unlocked it, but left it closed. When I turned around, she was watching me, a smile hovering on her lips.
“What was that about?” I asked.
Her mouth quirked. “I told you…sexual frustration.”
“And did that help?”
A knowing smile. “It helped you, didn’t it?”
I sighed and scrubbed a hand across my face, then made my way back to the desk and sank into my seat, ready to continue the conversation. Before I could figure out what to say, there was a knock at the door and it opened. Daddy Dearest poked his head in.
Holy Christ. If he’d tried that door five minutes before, it would have been locked and the whole situation would have been extremely suspicious. Had he been able to open the door, he would have found his daughter kneeling in front of me with my cock in her mouth. I went pale and April looked startled.
“April, I’m out for the night. I just wanted to say goodbye. I’ll see you down at our house for the weekend? Sarah and Daniel are really excited.”
She took a deep breath and let it go, holding her dad’s gaze for a long moment before nodding. “Yeah. Uh, sure.”
Minutes after he was gone, there was silence between us. I tried to focus on my task at hand while she seemed to be engrossed in her own work. All of a sudden, she burst out laughing.
And I couldn’t help it—I started to laugh, too.
When Adam came through the door to say he was locking up and sending everyone home, we were still cracking up and he stared at us like we were insane.
“Don’t mind us. We’re just giddy with exhaustion,” she said.
Adam frowned. “Ohhkay. All the more reason to go home and go to bed.”
I mock saluted him and he returned with a salute of his own, of the middle finger variety.
“Your cousin’s going to be happy you’re getting home at a decent hour.” April gave me a strange look. She didn’t know about the Adam-Mia cousin connection. I didn’t bother to explain.
“Die in a fire,” he replied.
After closing up shop, I walked out with the group while humming the tune to “Dueling Banjos.” At least Mia thought it was amusing. The boss, not so much.
***
We had four days until the IPO roadshow began. It would be two weeks of whirlwind visits to major cities across the country, presenting our case to the big bankers and investment companies for their backing. In a mere fifteen days, we were going to take Draco Multimedia Entertainment (under the New York Stock Exchange symbol, DME) to the market, and we needed them in our corner when it came time to ring the bell.
That didn’t mean I kept my hands off of April, though. The BJ in my office re-opened a sexual Pandora’s box that could not be closed, even if we’d wanted to.
The next day, just before lunch, April brought me some reports to glance through. She stood a little too close and smelled a little too good. I looked at the mess on my desk and sighed at the thought of all the work I had to do. She waited for me to say something, and I muttered about how annoyed I was that Charles was over at her desk every five minutes.
“Hmm. You’re not...jealous, are you?”
I lifted my brow. “No. I just don’t like how he’s distracting you from your work.”
“I’m getting my work done. But if you want, I’ll tell him that you told me to tell him to stay away.”
“I didn’t tell you to tell him that.”
She leaned against my desk, arms folded. “You seem a little frustrated, Mr. Fawkes. Can I help you with that?”
I clenched my jaw and scowled at her. She reached into her pocket, pulled something out and bent forward, stuffing it into my shirt pocket. “My lunch hour starts at one, and I might be hanging out in that ladies’ room off the warehouse that no one ever uses…”
With that, she straightened, pivoted and walked out, my eyes fastened to her ass like glue. When she sat at her desk, she tapped her chest to indicate I should look in my pocket. I did…and wished I hadn’t.
That foil wrapper represented everything I shouldn’t do but probably would.
I spent my lunch hour considering the possibility of an ice-cold shower in my private bathroom. At one, my phone chimed with a new text. I knew who it was from. I glanced up at her desk anyway and saw that she was, in fact, gone.
Come find me.
That was all it took. I was hard as a rock—again. Goddamn it. I had work to do. A lot of work to do. But I wanted her so badly it hurt.
I found her waiting by the door to the restroom in question. Without a word, we went inside and I spent the next half hour spreading her against the wall and having my way with her.
The ensuing days until I left town were like that. We’d find some place private and knock boots, sometimes twice a day, sometimes in my office when we were able. There was rarely any discussion involved, but the thrill of possibly getting caught was enough to get both our motors revved, much like our little outdoor adventure at the provincial park in Canada.
The night before I departed to start the roadshow, I actually left work early. I’d be flying to the East Coast and working my way back west, sometimes meeting Adam in the cities where more of the bankers were located. I’d be attending all the presentations; he’d be there for the biggest and most important ones.
April brought me dinner and she was my dessert. We still didn’t talk about what all the screwing meant—or what it would mean once the company went public and David was voted in as chairman of the board.
But regardless whether we discussed what would or wouldn’t happen, I was beginning to realize that it was going to be a long two weeks without her.
And it was. But not in the way I’d expected.
It quickly became obvious that she was following my itinerary, starting each day with a text message. Those messages soon became the highlight of my day.
Her: How’s Boston treating you?
Me: Not as good as you do.
Her: I’m sure you have some old sexts from former, ahem, “friends” to get you by.
Me: How ‘bout some new ones from you?
Her: Hi, how is Chicago?
Me: It sucks. I like my own bed.
Her: I like your bed, too. Preferably with you in it.
Me: Weiss, YABI (Our adopted acronym for “You are being inappropriate.”)
Her: Dallas! Woo hoo. Ready for some line dancing?
Me: I was born ready—and horny.
Her: You were born inappropriate.
Her: San Francisco…you’re getting warmer.
Me: I’m already hot.
Her: Fawkes, YABI
Me: Of course. And you love it.
Throughout the course of the roadshow, I was hit on a few times by some of the hot underwriters, but to my surprise, I wasn’t interested. They didn’t tempt me at all. I found myself thinking a lot about April instead, wondering what she was doing. Nonetheless, I fought the urge daily to hit the call button on my phone.
Finally, we emerged triumphant. Friday afternoon, just after close of business in New York, Adam and I touched down at John Wayne airport from Seattle. I got the call from our investment banker that the company had been valued at 8.3 billion USD. Our stock was going to open for a cool thirty-five dollars a share the following Monday morning, and we’d be on the floor of the stock exchange to ring the opening bell. It was going to be a feeding frenzy. And it was also going to be the realization of a long-awaited dream.
Adam and I stood by the baggage carousel high-fiving each other after I gave him the news. He immediately pulled out his phone and called Mia to share it with her. And I realized that the first person I wanted to tell was April…
I pulled out my phone and started keying in a text.
Market cap 8.3 bil. $35/share. Keep it quiet for now.
She replied less than a minute later.
Her: OMG! So happy for you. Deleting your text msg now.
Me: Our driver’s on the way, right?
Her: He should already be there.
“Who are you texting?” Adam asked once he hung up with Mia.
“Just making sure our ride is here. I get irritated when I have to wait,” I half-lied.
“We’ve got the company party tomorrow afternoon. We’ll keep it quiet until then and announce when we’re all together.”
“Sure. You going to tell David Weiss ahead of time?”
“Of course. He gets the next phone call.”
“How did Mia take the news that her cousin-slash-fiancé is a billionaire now?”
“She wasn’t very surprised. Happy for me, and all that.”
“Of course she’s happy for you. She gets half of it in the divorce.” I grinned but didn’t bother saying “JK”—he already knew I was joking.
He shook his head with a smile as he walked from the baggage area out to the curb. “I don’t even know why I tell you anything.”
“I know all about the legal particulars. For instance, it’s legal to marry your first cousin in California.”
“Good to know.” Adam approached our usual driver, who was already waiting with the trunk open. He tossed his bag in the back, and I came around and did the same. “Ah c’mon, you’re no fun when you aren’t telling me to fuck off.”
All he did was shoot me a knowing grin. Killjoy.
On the way home, I pulled out my phone to check it and found myself sending April another text.
Stay over with me tonight.
She didn’t reply for a long time. In fact, the next text I received from her was sent over two hours later.
Sorry, was in the middle of driving to La Jolla. Visiting my Dad’s tonight for little sis’s b-day. We’ll be coming to the party together. I’ll see you then.
I couldn’t believe the disappointment I felt by that. I wanted to see her. Sure, I wanted to rub myself all over her luscious body, but I also wanted to talk with her, maybe tease her a bit, smell her hair. I’d just assumed she’d be at my beck and call. And after two weeks of no sex, I wanted her at my beck and call, damn it.
***
To burn off some of the sexual frustration, I went out on dawn patrol to catch the waves early the next morning. Conditions were clean, and I caught some awesome A-frame, reef-breaking waves with hardly a soul out there. As it was October, the water was getting cold, so I wore my wetsuit. But after an hour or so, I got bored and headed back in. Then I checked my phone a few times, to see if maybe she’d sent a text. Nothing.
And really, what the hell was happening to me that it mattered so much?
That afternoon, there was a company pool party to celebrate the next step in our quest for gaming market domination. We’d rented out part of an obscenely expensive country club in South County for poolside cocktails and appetizers.
The officers and tentative board members met early for a private luncheon. David Weiss sat between Adam and me at the big round table, and I couldn’t help scanning the surrounding area for his daughter. I knew she’d come up with him, but I wasn’t supposed to know that and I didn’t want to be so obvious as to ask.
He was very interested to hear about the details of the road show and we filled him in accordingly. Finally, to my relief, Adam asked him about his daughter.
“Oh, she’s here. She’s running around with some of your assistants, helping with the details of the company party.”
It now became my mission to spot her without looking like I was trying to spot her. It was stupid, really. I could just text her. But she hadn’t texted me.
And what was all this stupid shit, anyway? I’d been out of high school almost a decade. Next, I’d be wondering if she’d kiss me under the bleachers at the homecoming dance. Fuck it. I was doing a pretty miserable job of staying uninvolved while being involved in whatever the hell this was. Co-workers with benefits? Very, very nice benefits.
After lunch, we went into dressing rooms and changed for the party. Though it was fall, it was still warm enough for a pool party. Only in Southern California, I thought, shaking my head.
Fifteen minutes into the party, I caught sight of her on the other side of the pool, speaking with a group of other interns. One of them was that little brat, Cari, who had tried to blackmail her weeks ago. They appeared to be on amicable terms now.
April was wearing a modest, black, one-piece swimsuit trimmed in bright blue. It had a high back, probably to hide the damning tattoo, which everyone here would recognize in an instant.
When she finally looked my way, I caught her eye. She sent me a tentative smile. Something lit up inside me and I smiled.
I shot a meaningful glance at the building, indicating I wanted to meet her there. She frowned and looked away. What the hell was up? Now I was pretty sure that she was purposely avoiding me, and that didn’t sit well. I thought about sending her a text message, but she’d likely ignore that too.
I skirted the pool and went directly to her and her little flock. She looked up, eyes widening. “Weiss, can I speak with you for a minute, please? I have a couple questions.”
“Sure,” she mumbled, looking back down. I stepped away while she excused herself, and then she followed me up the steps and toward the building, walking slower the closer we got. I held open the door for her, but she hesitated.
“What did you need to talk to me about?”
I glanced at the door. “Inside.”
She took a breath and then let it go. Once inside, I found an empty cabana dressing room and pulled her in with me. Just as she was about to talk, I turned, holding her face in between my hands, and kissed her the way I’d wanted to every night I’d been gone. She responded as if I was breathing new life into her, her body rising up against me, her fingers clutching at the t-shirt I wore with my swim trunks. Her mouth opened for more, as if she’d been starving, and, to be honest, her reaction just made me even hungrier for her.
Minutes later when I pulled back, she was flushed and breathless. The only sound in the silence between us was that of our heavy breathing. As I was bending in for more, she pulled away. “Did you actually have a question or were you pulling me in here to kiss me?”
“Is there a problem with that?”
She took a deep breath and let it go, her eyes hardening. Apparently, there was a problem with that.
“I’ll only be working for you for two more weeks. I want something real between us—not this sneaking around.”
I grinned. “I thought you liked sneaking around.” I punctuated that statement with another heated kiss, my tongue sweeping into her hot, delicious mouth. Then I reached around and grabbed her ass, pulling her flush against me.
She put her hands on my chest. “Jordan,” she said against my lips.
“Mmm…I missed you.”
She tilted her head away, looking up at me, perplexed. “You did?”
I frowned. “Why does that surprise you?”
She shook her head. “Because you’re confusing me. I don’t know what this is. Is this just about sex or is it more?”
I clenched my jaw and looked away. “It can’t be more than this. You know why. I’ve already told you.”
“You aren’t willing to take a chance on me—on us.”
“So I’m supposed to tell your Dad that we aren’t really dating, we’re just hooking up? Because I don’t do relationships—not real, serious relationships. So I’ll tell him I’m just fucking his daughter. How well will that go over?”
She swallowed. “Jordan…”
“What? Can it be more than that? No, no it can’t.”
Her lip trembled. “Well, it’s more for me, because…because I’m in love with you.”
At first I wasn’t quite sure I’d heard her right. Then, as understanding dawned, my first reaction was to deny, deny, deny. This wasn’t what she thought it was. It couldn’t be that. I couldn’t breathe. My chest felt tight and there wasn’t enough air in this little dressing room. She watched my reaction closely.
The last time a woman had said those words to me, I’d asked her to marry me and then she’d fucked some other guy. I couldn’t go there again. I wouldn’t go there again. Not now, maybe not ever.
I closed my eyes, scrubbing a hand over my face.