9
"When do you think he's going to come out of the closet?" Edward asked nonchalantly as we zipped through the downtown streets on my bike.
"Wait. What?" I tried to avoid hitting a red light.
"Aaron, when's he—?" he continued, yelling through the helmet as if he had said the most obvious thing in the world.
"I heard what you said, but that's pretty messed up. He's not gay." We slowed down, turning a corner.
"Seriously?"
"He's my… he was my best friend. I think I'd know if he was gay."
"You're telling me you can't tell that he's had a crush on you his whole life? I guess I'm going to have to do the thinking for the two of us in this relationship." Edward sighed, shaking his head at my ignorance.
"He's with girls all the time," I said.
First of all, I was more than aware of the irony in trying to argue the point. And secondly, it's not that it bothered me if my best friend was gay too… Okay, that’s actually a lie. Hypocritical as it was, it bothered me.
But the only reason why it did bother me so much was that I would be hurt that he didn't trust me enough to tell me.
And like that, I suddenly realized what Aaron’s problem had been this whole time. He probably felt the exact same way about me, not trusting him enough to let him know my secret.
"Have you actually seen him with a girl?" Edward asked.
I could tell from his tone as we trailed through the neighborhood that he wasn't trying to be sarcastic or spiteful, he was serious about this. If it were anyone else, I would dismiss it straight away. I’d call them crazy, and that would be it. But this was Edward, and history was on his side with being right all the time.
"Well, no but—?"
He chuckled. "When it quacks like a duck..."
"That's enough," I told him.
"It's not that big of a deal."
"I said, 'that's enough,'" I told him, biting back my anger. I'd never gotten that upset at him before, and I didn’t want it to get any worse. I wasn’t even angry at him. I knew it was my own problem and I didn’t want to take it out on the wrong person.
We rode through the streets completely silent.
"You can drop me off here, you know?" he said at a stop light.
"Are you out of your mind?" I asked.
"Did I stutter? If you're not going to talk to me, what's the point? I can get a taxi." He actually started to get off my bike until I reached back, stopping him.
"Edward, I swear to God. If you get off this bike..." I released my grip, placing my hand on his thigh.
"Then, what?" he challenged me.
"I'll make you wish you hadn't."
"How do you expect to do that?" He asked in his usual teasing manner.
I grumbled. "I'll pin you down in bed and keep you held up in the apartment until you apologize."
"Kinky," he teased.
"Did we just have our first fight?" I asked, unable to contain the excitement. It was an odd thing to be excited about, but the fact that that was our first fight, and it had barely amounted to a heated debate made me happier than I had been all day. I may try, but I just couldn't stay angry at him for long. How could I with such a gorgeous face and beautiful heart? "What am I going to do with you?"
"Listen to me." His voice was so sexy and soothing.
"What?" I asked.
"'Cause I'm only going to say this once, and you're not likely to hear it again."
"What's that?"
"I'm sorry," he said.
I cupped my ears, exaggerating the point. "What was that?"
"Don't push it, Mister," he joked.
I cracked a smile. I couldn't stay mad at him long, even if I had wanted to.
The light was taking forever to change, but I didn't care, it made it easier to talk to him, and I didn’t want the moment to be spoiled.
"But thank you," he said.
"For what?"
"For defending me. I've never had anyone do that for me before. It was kind of sexy. Actually, it was very sexy."
"Yeah?" I said, raising my eyebrows.
"But here's the thing. I don't ever want to come between you and your band or you and your best friend," he said quietly.
"You're not."
"Talk to him when we get home. Patch things up. I told you that you were too good for the band before, so just blame it on me."
"I'd never do that. I'm not that kind of man."
"I can take a pounding," he teased.
I chuckled. "I know that well."
"Seriously, it's not worth losing your friendship over a stupid argument. He's an asshole, but he's your asshole," said Edward.
Edward’s selflessness never ceased to amaze me; I was sure that even when we’re eighty-years-old, having spent a lifetime together, I will still be amazed by just how big and generous his heart is.
And further to the point, he was right. Aaron and I had been friends for too long for something like this to end it. I was going to have to speak to him and make it right.
~~
Apologizing to Aaron proved to be easier said than done. I tried calling him when we got home, and then after that and again after that. I hated when he got like this. He could be so childish sometimes. I wouldn’t be surprised if it took me a week to get through to him, but that was Aaron for you.
Luckily, it wasn’t going to take a week this time. As tomorrow was Saturday, I'd see him for rehearsal. He wouldn’t miss that over our spat. He'd have to face up to me whether he liked it or not.
As I approached the garage storage unit the next day, I could hear the music before I even got inside. By the sound of it, the guys were trying out a new song. I had to admit; it sounded tight.
As I entered, they looked at me, slowing for a second. Aaron however, completely turned the other way, ignoring me completely.
I nodded at the other guys, indicating they should step out so he and I could be alone.
Unsurprisingly, they didn't even put up a fight, only placed their instruments down and shuffled out. I was sure that they were just as interested in us making up as I was. Anything to help the band.
So there we were; Aaron and me, alone for the first time since our fight. The silence that settled between us was laced with a thick tension. I was sure that I could have thrown a rock at him and the atmosphere alone would have blocked it from hitting Aaron.
"We still performing tomorrow night?" I asked, breaking the ice.
"Oh, so you want to be part of the band now?" He sighed as he wrapped the mic cord around in a circle.
"Come on. Don't be that way. I lost my temper," I said, stuffing my hands in my pockets.
"You hit me in my nose. You're lucky you didn't break it. I'd never be able to perform again."
He was right, at least about the nose. It was still a little red and puffy, but he was a big boy. I'd seen him in fights before, and he was tougher than he looked. He was just exaggerating to try and make me feel bad.
"Don't be dramatic," I teased, cracking a smile.
"That's easy for you to say. You got some rich dude to support you if you fall on your ass—"
"It's not that way," I said, cutting him off.
"I only got me, man—especially now that… you're gone." His voice cracked a little, and it made me feel guilty.
It wasn't easy for a guy like him to open up like that and express himself. That fact that he said anything at all should have screamed to me how upset he was feeling.
I sighed as the silence settled between us again. It was only broken by the gentle buzzing sound of the crappy speaker system we used.
"I said 'I'm sorry' and you know I mean it. Can we just let it go? I'll make it up to you," I said.
He looked directly at me. "You want to make it up to me?"
"Yeah, anything," I said, meaning it. If I could repair the relationship, I'd do it in a second. He just had to name it.
He was like the twin brother I never had, and I hated the thought of losing him. Up until I had met Edward, he was without a doubt the most important person in my life.
"Ditch him," Aaron said. There wasn’t a hint of empathy.
I exploded. "What?"
"I'm not joking, Cody. A lot of people would love to be with you... Girls, guys, whatever you're into. Why him?" he said.
"Dude, Edward is my man."
"It's him or us. Which are you going to choose?" His nostrils flared as he waited for an answer. I could see him clenching his fist as if preparing himself for round two.
"You can't seriously expect me to…" I couldn’t even finish what I was going to say. I didn’t need to. By the look on his face, I could tell that he meant what he said.
"It's not going to last, you know," he warned, walking closer.
"How the hell do you know?" I stepped back, doing everything I could to control my rage.
"A dude like that, with someone like you?" He shrugged, shaking his head.
"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked. I wasn’t even mad as I was more offended. How could Aaron, my best friend, say something like that?
"Come on man; it doesn't take a brain surgeon. You and I are cut from the same cloth. We're best friends through and through."
"What's your point?" I asked him.
Aaron sighed as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, "He's never had to struggle. He's had a silver spoon in his mouth his whole life. What's he going to do when your lights turn off, or you can't pay rent one month? Stick with you? I don't think so."
"You don't know him," I said, defending my man.
"Dude, let's get realistic. He'll hitch a ride with the first Ivy-league preppy boy that offers him a one-way ticket back to the life he's used to," said my best friend, although I was very much playing loosely with that term at the moment.
His words hit me hard. Aaron knew me well enough to push the buttons that would make an impact, and he wasn’t holding back.
I'd had my problems with women too, long before hooking up with a wealthier guy. Without the education or pedigree that other guys had, I only had my talent, looks, and charm to get me through. That was obviously what hooked Edward to me in the first place, but if I were being real with myself I’d have to ask how long that would last? Was Edward going to get bored with me the moment something better came along?
"You don't know him," I said, not as convinced this time. I walked away before I lost my temper again.
"You know what I'm saying is true. Deep inside, you've always known," he called after me.
"You know what he told me? My fiancé told me to make it up to you."
"And?"
"He cares about me enough not to let our relationship get in the way of our friendship. You know what else he said? That, that you have a thing for me—"
I swallowed the rest of my words, instantly regretting that I had said them. I was angry with him, sure, but not angry enough to hurt him.
I cringed, as I watched Aaron’s face turn from shock to anger. I wanted to take everything back. It had been a heat of the moment comment with no real truth in it. He had been trying to push my buttons; I just wanted to push his.
And yet, as the words settled over him, I studied my best friend's face for signs of the truth. It was blank at first as he stuttered for words. But this didn’t last long with it quickly turning red.
"Get out and don't come back here again. Ever!" he yelled, kicking the mic stand down.
"I wouldn't care if you were, you know? Wouldn't bother me. We can still be friends, I'm just not into you like that," I tried to tell him, careful to keep my distance in case he charged me.
"And don't bother coming to my dad's shop either. Consider yourself fired!"