* * *

Present:

“What was I, Lo’? Just a stand-in? Jesus!”

“Will you shut up? Geez. Shouldn’t the past have shown both of us not to jump to conclusions? You know how my family is. They think it’s their right to know everything, and since I haven’t gone on a date in forever—”

“But you have dated, Lo’. You’ve gone on dates since the divorce,” I growl. I can’t help that the tone of my voice comes out accusatory. It’s something that’s always pissed me off. It’s hard for a man to see the woman he has thought of as his forever go out with other men. There were nights I had to drink until I passed out just to keep from killing one of the bastards.

“Well, yeah. A couple of times in the beginning. Mostly because Mom, Maggie, and Mary wouldn’t shut up,” she mutters. I glance over at her, and she looking down at her hands. She’s picking imaginary lint from her clothes. It’s another one of her nervous gestures, and for some reason, it makes me smile.

“One day you’re going to have to learn to live your life without letting them have a say in it,” I chastise, and I know I shouldn’t have. Still, there’s an old bitterness inside of me that I’ve never been able to let go.

“Believe it or not, Luka, I have… or at least I was, until…”

“Until?”

“Can we just drop this?” she mutters, looking out the window.

“Maybe you and I have dropped things way too often, Lo’. Don’t you look back sometimes with regrets? Wish we had done things differently?”

“Every. Damned. Day,” she answers unequivocally and immediately.

“So have I, Lo’. So have I.”

“Let’s just say,” she begins, “seeing you with Tani was like a giant sign from the universe that I need to stop living in the past. It wasn’t that spectacular to begin with.”

Her words register, and I’m not sure how I feel about them. She’s not wrong, but then again, she’s not completely right either. There’s so much I would like to say to her, but they are things I don’t want to bring up between us. I feel like I’m walking on eggshells with Petal, and somehow that has to stop.

“Not all of it was bad, Lo’,” I tell her, and it seems to be a familiar refrain between the two of us—especially tonight. But I need her to keep admitting it to me at least.

“No. Not all of it was bad,” she says with a sad smile, “but still, seeing another woman hug you, kiss you… I couldn’t argue with Maggie. I can’t keep hiding from the world. I love my son, but I’m also a woman… my own person. It’s not healthy to ignore that.”

“Have you been ignoring that?” I ask before I can stop myself.

She lets out a loud sigh, and I figure she’s going to ignore my question. Instead, she surprises me.

“Mentions of cobwebs growing in undisclosed areas were made,” she jokes, and even in the low light in the cab of the car, I can see her blush.

“I think we just took care of any cobwebs,” I tell her, slowing down so that I can stare at her a little longer.

“I guess we did.” She smiles, and her gaze holds mine for a minute before I am forced to look back at the road.

“Ask me how many dates I’ve been on in the year we’ve been divorced, Lo’.”

“Luka, it’s really none of my business.”

“Ask me, Lotus Petal,” I order, and fight my smile when she visibly reacts in distaste.

“How many dates have you been on?”

“The other night with Tani was the first time I’ve asked a woman out since our divorce papers were signed. I knew it was a mistake when I did it, and after she tried to kiss me—she knew it, too.”

“You don’t have to say that, Luka,” she whispers, and she’s not looking at me, but I can hear the doubt in her voice. With a sigh, I pull over to the side of the road yet again—although sadly, not for the same reason as earlier. “Luka? What are you doing?” Petal asks, surprised. “Listen, I know we got carried away earlier, but maybe—”

I reach over and pull her hand to my groin, and then I flatten the palm of her hand against the outline of the raging cock-stand I still have—despite coming just a little bit ago.

“Do you feel that, Lo’?” I know she does, because she’s pressing her hand hard against the rigid shaft. I watch her face, and when her tongue comes out to lick hungrily against her lips, I groan. I wrap my hand around the side of her neck and bring her lips to mine. I curse the damned seatbelt that keeps me from scooping her up and pulling her onto my lap.

She immediately opens her mouth for me, hungry for my kiss in a way she’s never been before. She’s almost as aggressive as me, and feeling her hunger for me is the sweetest taste of heaven I’ve ever had. I own her mouth, devouring her with my kiss and bruising her lips carelessly. I could get drunk just from the taste of her.

“Luka,” she whispers breathlessly when we finally break apart.

“I need you again already. I have never come harder in my life than I did back there beside the road, Lo’, and I’m already close to coming again. That doesn’t just happen, honey. I’ve been without a woman for a long time.”

My lungs feeling like they’re on fire from the burning need raging through me. I didn’t think about my words, but I immediately feel the way her body tenses. I guess I’m not the only one to jump to conclusions.

“Lo’, I’ll spell it out for you,” I tell her, putting my fingers under her chin to bring those blue eyes up to my face. I need her to see me when I talk. I need her to see the truth. “I haven’t wanted another woman—but you.”

I watch as the truth hits her. Her dark blue eyes widen, and her pupils dilate. Her breathing stalls as her hand flexes against my cock.

“I haven’t wanted anyone else either, Luka. I never have, but there’s so much between us…”

“How about we go with whatever happened tonight and take it day by day?”

“Day by day?” she whispers, her stare clouding with confusion.

“No expectations, no demands, Lo’. Let’s just… go slow and take it—”

“Day by day,” she finishes, biting on her bottom lip.

“Can you do that?”

“Can you?” she asks me in return.

“I think it’s the best way. We have to worry about River. We don’t want to confuse him.”

“Blue’s not going to keep his mouth quiet…”

“I’ll deal with your brother.”

“Please,” she responds. “You know as well as I do, it’s not going to be contained to just one brother,” she half laughs, but I hear the stress in her voice.

“I learned how to tangle with the Crayon boys years ago when it came to you. I think I can handle it.”

“I’m just not sure why you want to,” she whispers, her teeth worrying the side of her bottom lip.

“The reason is what it has always been, Lo’. I want more of you.”

“I want more of you, too.”

“Then we start tonight,” I tell her, giving her a quick kiss and then turning away from her before I give in to my desire to fuck her right here in the truck.

“We start… What do you mean?”

“I mean River is with your mother. The house is empty, and I’m not done with you tonight, Lo’. Not by a long shot.”

“Oh…” she breathes out as I pull onto the main road.

I look over at her briefly. “Any arguments?”

“None,” she says, surprising me. I find myself hoping she has a lot more surprises in store for me tonight.