Eric
I couldn’t believe she was actually a virgin before we got started, but there was no missing the way she almost screamed when I first entered her.
“Are you okay?” I asked, stretched out on my side next to her. She was on her back, and I could just barely see in the dark that her eyes were closed.
“Yeah, I’m okay,” she whispered. It sounded like she was crying.
“Are you sure?”
She nodded. “I don’t know if this is how I normally am when I have sex, since that was the first time I ever did.”
I did my best not to laugh. It was a serious moment for her, I knew. “Is there anything I can do?”
She turned her head toward me. “Really?” She sounded awed.
“Well, yeah. I mean, if you’re feeling weird, I wanna help you. I can’t let you lay here crying.”
She sighed. “Thank you. Can I…like…sorta snuggle up a little? Just a little.”
I hesitated. I didn’t want her to get any ideas. But what could happen? Besides, I understood how she felt. I still remembered my first time. And I had been with virgins before, when I was a teenager. I remembered how they were a little emotional afterward. It made sense.
“Okay.” I held out one arm to her, and she turned her back to my chest. I spooned her, wrapping her up tight. “Is that good?”
“Yes. Thank you.” We stayed that way for a long time. Her body trembled under my arm.
“You’re not scared of me, are you?”
“No.” It came too fast, though. Like she was afraid to tell the truth. I cut her some slack.
“You don’t have to be. I’m not such a bad person.” I was a terrible person, an awful person. A murderer, and that was just the start of the list. She didn’t need to know that. I didn’t want her to know.
She was the first really good woman I’d ever slept with. The thought almost made me gasp out loud. It was the truth, too. I wasn’t used to being with women like her. Smart women, beautiful women, women with a future ahead of them. Women with good hearts. She had a good heart.
I didn’t normally think about things like that. What did I care if a woman was a nice person? If she was willing to fuck and worth fucking, she was okay by me. But this girl was different. She took care of her mother, who was dying. She was willing to give up her virginity just to pay for the old lady to have hospice care. It blew me away. I hadn’t known women like her existed.
“Can I ask you something?” I whispered. I hoped to make her feel a little more comfortable, because already I was thinking about doing her again. I stirred against her ass. She was so tight, so delicious. That first thrust was like heaven, a pure rush. I needed another hit.
“What do you want to know?”
“You said you’re a bartender, right?”
“Yes.”
“You seem too smart for that. What is it you really wanna do?”
“What if I really want to be a bartender?” she asked.
I laughed softly. “Nobody dreams of being a bartender.”
“I guess not. I really want to go to culinary school and become a chef. I majored in hospitality in college.”
“Wow, that’s cool. So you wanna have your own place one day, or what?”
“Exactly.” She sounded a little more comfortable, telling me about what she wanted to do with her life. Good thing, too, since I was getting harder every time she wiggled against me. I knew she had no idea what she was doing, which made it even sexier. Turning me on without meaning to.
“Why don’t you do it, then? Go back to school?”
“It’s super expensive. Like, ridiculously.”
“Do you really need to go to school for it, though? Could you just go to work in a kitchen?”
“I guess, but I really want the training.” She settled back against me, and I almost groaned in her ear. It was already killing me just trying to come up with questions to ask her. I was too distracted to think straight. She was making it so hard for me not to take advantage of her. I wanted to turn her over, spread her legs and take her from behind like an animal. I wanted to fuck her until she screamed my name and passed out because it felt too good.
But she wasn’t the kind of girl I could do that to. I had to get her into it first.
My arm was still around her, and my fingers were curled up on the mattress. I knew her tits were right in front of them, waiting for me to touch. I ran my fingers over her nipples, which went hard right away. I bit my lip to hold back another groan. She was so easy to turn on; it was like a gift. I flicked her nipples again, slowly, like I wasn’t even meaning to. Just casual.
Her breathing almost stopped. She was too busy concentrating on what I was doing to her. I flexed my fingers again, strumming them across her tits. My cock strained against her ass. She was so warm, and I knew she would be so wet when I found her spot. I sighed and flexed my hips.
She sighed, too. I had her. She finally felt me and knew what she was feeling. I ran my hand down her stomach, then to her mound. Her legs were closed, but it didn’t take much effort to get them open again. I found her button, pulsing in her folds, and she cried out when my fingers slid over it. She was wet again, like I knew she would be. She rocked her hips against my hand in a fast, urgent rhythm. I licked her neck, shoulders, anything I could get my mouth on while she came with a sharp, shuddering cry.
“Oh, my God…” She sighed as she collapsed back against me. “Oh, Eric.”
“I need you,” I growled, licking her earlobe as I did. “I need you now. I need to be inside you again.” She shivered in my arms. I knew then how much she wanted me, too.
“Yes. Take me. Please. But be gentle,” she pleaded.
“I will.” I couldn’t promise, but I would try. My cock was doing the thinking for me, and it was straining and throbbing.
I left her on her side, taking her top leg and pushing it forward until she was almost on her stomach. I loved the angle this position gave me. I slid one leg between hers and slid my cock through her cleft until I found her entrance.
“Are you sure?” she whispered. I didn’t know what she was asking, really. Was I sure I could be careful with her, maybe.
“I’m sure,” I muttered, then thrusted forward slowly. She whimpered, burying her face in the pillow. Her muscles were still trembling and pulsing, and it took everything in me to hold back. I wanted to pound her until I couldn’t move anymore. Her body was begging me to come. But I waited for her to adjust with my jaw clenched.
“Okay,” she whispered, taking a deep breath. “I’m okay.” I didn’t wait to hear anything more. I pulled back, then slid forward again. Pulled back, then slid forward. She whimpered a little with every thrust, though the sound of them changed. First it was discomfort, maybe uncertainty. Then it was pleasure. I filled her again and again, stretching her with my thickness. She felt so good.
“You’re so good,” I whispered, pushing into her. “So hot.” She shivered, and I felt her tighten even more.
“I wanna feel you come,” I whispered. “I want you to come for me when I’m inside you. Touch yourself for me.” I held myself up on one hand, taking her tits in the other and playing with them. It was so good. Her body was perfect, and nobody had ever played with it but me. I throbbed a little when I thought that.
“What did you say?” She looked back at me.
“Touch yourself. Don’t tell me you never did.” I kept thrusting, never losing my pace. “Make yourself come. I wanna feel it.”
She waited for a second, then her hand slid between the bed and her body. She stiffened for a second, probably still sensitive from the last orgasm. Then she sighed, and started grinding her hips into the bed.
“Fuck,” I whispered. It was even better than I thought, especially the way she moved against me when she moved her hips. The longer she went, the tighter she got as she started to come. I felt her clamp around me so tight it almost hurt—then she screamed into the pillow, and her muscles started pulsing again.
“Yes…yes…that’s it…” I pumped harder, just hard enough to push myself over the edge. I grunted loudly, exploding inside her. She was still quivering when I slid out.
I rolled onto my back, breathing heavy. I kept a hand on her back, though. I had the feeling she needed the contact. She was feeling emotional again, probably.
What was it about her? Why did I even care? I hadn’t spent the money, or promised to, so I could babysit an emotional chick for the rest of the night. It wasn’t my fault she didn’t know how to be after sex. I hadn’t done anything to hurt her.
Unless I had. Fuck. I didn’t wanna be that guy who could fuck her up for the rest of her life or something.
“I didn’t hurt you, did I?” I rolled over until I was almost on top of her. She was just the way I left her, practically on her stomach with her legs spread.
“No. I mean, not any more than you would have, anyway. You’re pretty big.” Then she laughed quietly. “Isn’t that what guys like to hear?”
“Yeah, but it helps if the girl is telling the truth,” I said.
“Oh, I am. You’re huge. I didn’t think I could get you all the way inside me.”
I couldn’t help it. My ego got a little bigger.
“What’s wrong, then?”
“I don’t know. It’s a lot to handle,” she admitted. She finally rolled over, and I moved back to give her room. “Like, we didn’t know each other before we started doing this. That’s strange for me. I don’t know if you’re used to being with a lot of different women…”
“I wouldn’t say a lot,” I said. I was lying, but she didn’t need to know. What she also didn’t need to know about was the sex fest I was on in the months after my release. I must have slept with dozens of women since then, in just three months.
Still, she was different. I hated that the thought kept coming to mind, but I couldn’t stop it. There was something special about her. I felt more comfortable with her. I could be myself, not “Eric the biker” or “Eric the tough guy.” It was who I was, but not all of who I was. I had pushed myself way down deep inside a long time before that. It made it easier for me to do the things I had to do. I could beat a guy half to death as long as I didn’t think about what it might do to his family, or whether he had a mother who worried about him being mixed up in the wrong things. I could run guns and drugs as long as I didn’t think about the people on the other side of the transaction—the people who would eventually get their hands on both and maybe kill themselves or other people.
I could kill someone if I didn’t think of them as a person who had a life in the minute before they crossed my path.
I moved away from her, rolling onto my back again. I couldn’t be too close to her, because she kept making me think these thoughts. I didn’t want to think them. Life was easier when I didn’t think.
She wouldn’t let me get away though. This time, she rolled over toward me and snuggled up next to me. Oh, shit. I wanted to buck her off, tell her to stick to her side of the bed.
But I couldn’t. Not just because it would be a dick thing to do, but because I already wanted her again. Instead of pushing her away, I put my arms around her.