CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

COLE

We enter the clubhouse, and I walk past her over to the stairs. I take them two at a time and turn on the light once I hit the landing. A big wooden log bed sits in the middle of the area. And that’s it. No TV, no dressers, no nightstands. There’s a door to my right leading to the full bath.

She comes to the top of the stairs and looks around as I drop her bag. She hasn’t spoken since we stood in the middle of the road, but I know she wants to.

And now that my anger has died down, I hate that I told her to go fuck Bryan. The words tasted like shit. The thought of him sleeping with her makes my stomach knot.

“Cole—”

“Stop,” I interrupt her.

Her eyes narrow on me. I step to her. “Just stop talking,” I say, placing my hand in her hair. Her heavy eyes close, and she lets out a sigh. She’s drunk. And probably still pissed at me. Possibly tired. But I don’t fucking care.

I want her!

I lean down and press my lips to hers. She opens without thought, tilting her head back. I push my hips into hers, and she moans in my mouth. I’m so hard for her all the fucking time. I’s pathetic.

I reach for her sweater and pull it up over her head. “Can we take a shower?” she asks.

I’m about to say fuck a shower, but her eyes go to the blood on my hands, and I realize I just got it in her hair. “Sure.” I don’t want any part of Bryan on her. Even though I would love to paint her body red.

We walk into the bathroom, and she looks around as I start the shower. I remove my shirt and then kick off my tennis shoes. I’m removing my jeans and boxers when she comes up to me. I pause as she places her hands on my bare chest.

My heart starts to pound at the softness in her touch. No one has ever touched me like she does. Like it means something. As if she could save me from myself. I’ve always been the guy who got in and got out. The girls I brought home, didn’t stay the night, and the older women I fucked, I left their house as soon as I was done. But I can’t seem to leave her. I reach up and push her hair behind her ear, exposing all the piercings. I run my thumb over them.

She releases a long breath. “I don’t wanna fight.”

Her words surprise me. “I don’t either,” I say, and I’m just as surprised with myself that they are the truth. I love a fight. Doesn’t matter if they are physical or mental. I love fucking with someone.

“Can we just forget about what happened?” she asks, biting on her bottom lip nervously.

I can’t just forget that Bryan dared his friend to fuck her. What if someone else does that? What if someone else tries to take what belongs to me? Or worse? Forces her? I know I’m a sick bastard. I know that I prefer a fight over a civil conversation, but there are others in this city just like me. Some older and some younger. “Yeah,” I tell her because I don’t want to worry her. I’ll continue to protect her no matter what the cost. Because I’m the only one who can destroy Austin Lowes.

Right.

She pulls away from me and goes to finish getting undressed. I turn and get into the shower, and she follows me. I stand under the sprayer, and she watches the blood run into the drain.

I grab her arm and pull her to me. “Don’t think about it,” I tell her.

She wraps her arms around my neck. “Then take my mind off it.”

I capture her lips with mine and spin us around, her back hitting the wall. She gasps into my mouth at the coldness, and I deepen the kiss.

My right hand goes to her thigh, and I grip it in my hand and lift it up, wrapping it around my hip.

She pulls her lips away and tilts her head back. Her eyes are closed, and her wet lips are parted. I take my hard cock in my hands and slide it into her without wasting another second, and she whimpers. Fuck, I love hearing that sound when I’m inside her.

She’s already wet for me. Just like I’m hard for her.

She opens her heavy eyes, and she moans as I begin to move in and out of her. Slowly teasing her.

I grab her other leg and pull it off the shower floor and push her more into the wall. She clings to me.

“Cole,” she pants, and I pick up my pace. “Oh, God! Cole …”

I lower my head and capture her lips with mine again, knowing that she’s mine. I get to have her. However I want, whenever I want.

_________________________________

I open my eyes to see Austin sleeping beside me. The sun shines through the one window up here and I roll over, picking my phone off the floor to check the time. It reads a quarter past nine.

Lying back down, I run a hand down my face. We didn’t get much sleep. We didn’t get back to the clubhouse until after two a.m. and then we spent almost an hour in the shower. And then another two awake in bed.

Like always, I couldn’t get enough. She couldn’t seem to either, and I’m not complaining.

“You okay?”

I look over to my left and find a set of dark green eyes on me. I smile at her, pushing her hair back from her face. I yank the covers back and grab her arm, yanking her up to straddle me. “I am now.”

She throws her head back laughing, and I soak it in. I’ve never heard her laugh like that. I’ve only ever seen anger from her. Or sadness. I’ve never tried to make her laugh or smile.

I should make her do it more often.

She straddles me naked and beautiful. Her dark hair is down over her shoulder lying on my chest. It’s finally dry from the shower we had hours ago, and the alcohol she consumed seems to have worn off.

Her eyes scan my chest, and her fingers graze my scar. She’s never asked about it before. “What happened?”

“Broke my collarbone.”

She tilts her head to the side. “How?”

My eyes look into hers while she stares at it. “Car wreck. Seat belt tightened and snapped it on impact.”

Her hand freezes on the scar, and her eyes meet mine. She stares at me so intently that my pulse quickens.

“You lied.”

My eyes narrow at the accusation in her voice. “Excuse me?”

“You lied,” she repeats.

“About what?” I demand.

“You weren’t driving.”

I tense at her words. She searches my eyes and sighs heavily, her breath brushing her hair from my chest. “Who were you covering for?”

“Enough!”

“No, Cole. Why did you lie?” she demands. I grip her hips, my fingertips digging into her skin, and shove her off me. I stand, running a hand through my hair and walking toward the bathroom.

“You couldn’t have been driving,” she whispers. “It’s your right shoulder. Not your left. You lied …”

I close my eyes. It took her two seconds to realize what no one else ever did. I was in a sling for months. My right arm was. Not my left. No one ever questioned it.

“Why would you lie, Cole?”

“Don’t, Austin.”

“No!” she shouts. “Fucking tell me why you would lie about something like that,” she demands. “People think you killed three of your friends.”

“I fucking know what they think!” I shout turning to face her. “Who the hell do you think told them that?” I snap.

“Why?” She’s on her knees in the middle of my bed. Her long dark hair over one shoulder, covering one of her breasts from me, and she’s breathing heavy. Her eyes soft and my chest tightens.

“Get out!”

“It was Eli … That’s why you …”

“I said get the fuck out, Austin,” I snap, interrupting her.

“No.”

I fist my hands, and her eyes drop to them.

“Becky said everyone was ejected. But you had your seat belt on …” She shakes her head confused. “I don’t understand …”

I storm over to the bed and shove her onto her back, pinning her small wrists to the mattress. “You don’t need to understand what I did, or why I did it. It’s no one’s Goddamn business, Austin.”

She looks up at me, eyes soft. I’m fucking panting, and my heart races. I hate being exposed. So open. Guarded people are safe. But she keeps stabbing me. Making me bleed. Her eyes search my face, and I see tears in them. My jaw clenches.

“Cole,” she whispers. “I’m sorry.”

My chest tightens to the point I can’t breathe.

“I’m sorry that no one sees you like I do. I’m sorry that no one understands your rage. Or your hate.”

“Stop …” I choke on the word. She’s twisting the knife. Cutting me more.

She wraps her legs around my hips. “I’m sorry that you lost three friends. And that you are left with a burden that is not yours to bear.” Her tears spill out and down the sides of her face.

AUSTIN

He lied!

He let this town believe he killed three teenage boys who were all his friends when he wasn’t at fault.

“Were you even drinking?” I ask.

I can feel his body physically shaking against mine. He’s angry with me. Angry I figured out a secret.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” he says instead. “You weren’t there.”

“I didn’t have to be there to know that you weren’t responsible for their deaths.”

“Stop, Austin!” he yells in my face.

“Do the guys know?” I ask as another tear runs down the side of my face.

He doesn’t answer.

“Becky also told me that Kellan blames you. Why didn’t you tell him the truth?”

My heart breaks for him. Not only did he lose his friends, but he also took responsibility when it wasn’t his.

He lets go of my wrists and crawls off me, forcing my legs apart. He sits on the side of the bed, his back toward me and bows his head.

I swallow and sit up. “I know that you felt you did the right thing, but Cole …”

He jumps up and spins around to face me. My words cut off at the look on his face. I’ve never seen it so murderous. “Don’t you dare sit there and pretend like you know why I did what I did,” he snaps as he leans over and picks his jeans up off the floor. He yanks them up and buttons them. The he takes off down the stairs.

I sit here, waiting to hear the door open and close, but it doesn’t come. I get off the bed and take the sheet with me, wrapping it around my shoulders. I walk down the stairs to find him standing in the middle of the room. His hands fisted in front of him as he punches the punching bag that hangs from the rafters.

“Tell me,” I say softly. “Help me understand.”

He ignores me. His breathing grows louder as he pounds away on it. His cuts from last night have already busted open from the force.

I drop my head to look at my hands knotted in the sheet, holding it in place. I lick my wet lips and taste my tears. “I was ten the first time my mom’s boyfriend touched me.” He stops at my words. Like I wanted him to. “At the time, I didn’t understand what he was doing.” I swallow the knot in my throat. “I was sitting on the couch. He sat down next to me and placed his hand on my inner thigh.” I look up at him through my lashes. His back is toward me, and his head is down. “I didn’t know what to do. It felt uncomfortable. Wrong. But he was telling me that I was pretty. No one had ever told me that before.” The muscles in his back tighten. “Then his fingers started digging into my skin painfully. I told him he was hurting me. I tried to push him away, but his grip kept tightening. He said that I’d learn to love pain. It was a way he would show me that he cared about me.” He slowly turns around to face me, and I look him in the eyes. Not backing down like I wanted to when we stood by the pool. “Loved me.” He swallows, and his Adam’s apple bobs.

“That’s when my mother walked in. She saw us, and she ran over to me, grabbed my arm, and yanked me from the couch. She sent me to my room for the rest of the day.” His chest rises and falls from breathing heavy. His jaw is sharp, and nostrils flared. “She said that he belonged to her. That my father had already left her because of me. She wouldn’t let her bitch of a daughter take another one from her.” A tear silently falls down my cheek, but it’s for him, not for me. I came to terms with my life a long time ago.

“I might not understand why you did it, but I know what it’s like to have a secret. You told me that you knew what it was like to be powerless. To have no control. We are the same, Cole. You blame yourself for losing your friends, and I blamed myself for a man wanting me. It took me years to realize he was the one in the wrong. And I had to figure that out on my own. I didn’t have anyone to explain it to me. To help me.” He releases a long breath, looking away from me. “So I’m gonna tell you what someone should have told me.” His eyes come back to mine, and I walk over to him. I reach out to cup his face, and the sheet falls to the floor at my feet. Another tear runs down my face, and he gently wipes it away. “It wasn’t your fault, Cole.”

He lowers his forehead down to mine and closes his eyes. “We’re not the same, Austin. Because unlike you, I wasn’t innocent.” He pulls away and stares down at me. “I knew what we were doing. We went to a party like we always did. Got drunk like we always did. And then left. I took the blame because I should have been the one driving. In a matter of minutes, they were … just gone.” His voice is rough as if he had been holding those words in for a long time. My tears start to fall faster.

“I’m sorry, Cole. I’m so sorry.”

He wraps his harms around me and pulls me to him. “I’m sorry too, sweetheart.” He kisses my hair.