Emery
I woke up around four in the morning and couldn’t get back to sleep. Not wanting to wake Rafe up I grabbed my cellphone and retreated to the patio. The day before, he’d shown me the beautiful outdoor kitchen area and I’d almost done a jig when I saw that there was a Nespresso machine. I didn’t hesitate to make my way over to get my first dose of caffeine. Once my coffee was made, I took my cup and sat in one of the rockers at the corner of the patio. From there, I was able to see almost the whole yard, which meant I was able to keep an eye on my still-sleeping boy. He’d been such a trooper, first relocating to the Cruz’s Malibu yard, then taking an eleven hour plane ride to another country and, finally, assimilating himself to yet another of the Cruz’s outdoor spaces.
After I’d taken a few delicious sips of my drink, I curled up in the rocker and picked up my cellphone. Since leaving New Zealand, I’d avoided all of the gossip sites, but it was time for me to see what was really going on. I grimaced as I typed my name into Google and watched the results come in. There was one story after another, and from what I could see they all had the same bottom line. The stories all claimed that I’d been unstable and erratic on the set of Ghosts of You due to my addiction to alcohol and pills. I rolled my eyes as I scrolled through the sites and saw the same story over and over again. An “anonymous source” on-set had confirmed that my “behavior” had become so erratic that they “had” to fire me.
I stewed over the situation through another cup of coffee, and then I decided to take action. Pulling up my email, I went through my contact list and addressed a message to all of the editors of the celebrity shows, magazines, and blogs in Hollywood. I then spent the next twenty minutes composing an email addressing the situation head-on. When I was finished I read it over twice to polish it and then hit send, knowing that in doing so I’d officially given the finger to the industry. I was okay with that.
I’m writing today to give you my side of events from the set of Ghosts of You. This will be the one and only time I discuss it, so take it or leave it. For starters, the “anonymous source” on set claiming I’m an addict is, without a doubt, Elliot Abrams, the writer and director of the movie. I’m neither an alcoholic nor a drug addict, as anyone who spends even one hour with me can tell you. I know that the story of the tragically broken Hollywood starlet sells, so I’m very cognizant of the fact that my truth will be ignored in favor of something far more salacious. If need be, I’ll sue Elliot for slander, much as I’d rather not deal with him ever again.
The truth about why I left New Zealand is simple. I hated the movie and regretted ever agreeing to do it. The script is awful, the direction is the worst I’ve ever experienced, and I know that the end result is going to be lambasted by critics and viewers alike. I won’t blame them—it’s that bad. I take full responsibility for signing on to do a project I knew wasn’t ideal. As you know, I briefly dated Elliot. Although our relationship was casual and undeveloped, I foolishly let him browbeat and manipulate me into agreeing to take the lead in the project. I should have said no—but I didn’t.
The next thing I knew I was in New Zealand on a remote set filming something that was hot garbage. A situation arose with Elliot that I took issue with and his response was hostile and abusive. For decades, women in Hollywood have been forced to take it on the chin when the men “in power” behave badly. That morning in New Zealand was the straw for me. I’d had enough.
I wasn’t fired—I quit. I quit (sober, as I’d never had even one sip of alcohol on set) in person to both Elliot and then to the producer. In the following hours, I was threatened by multiple people including my agent who fired me for reneging on a contract. That was the only time I was fired that day and I’m okay with that.
In addition to the movie being dreck, I quit because I didn’t want that life. Although I genuinely enjoyed my time on Bytes with the incredible cast, crew, and production team, my heart is not in Hollywood. Whatever happens with Ghosts of You, it was my last job in entertainment. The abuse, rumors, backstabbing, gossip, and over-the-top lies aren’t something anyone with a choice should put up with—so I’m not.
I offer my heartfelt thanks and wishes for the best of luck to everyone who made my time in the business enjoyable.
Sincerely,
Emery Bellerose
With that stress officially behind me I felt as though the weight of the world had been lifted from my shoulders. I finished my coffee and rinsed out the mug in the outdoor sink before I headed inside to crawl back into bed with Rafe.