Mina
Nastasia drove in silence, and I was thankful for the song on the radio for making a ridiculously awkward situation a little less awkward.
After Lev told me that Lidiya was his daughter, leaving me officially shocked, the conversation took a quick turn as Lev stood with the little girl, walked over to his sister, kissed her on the cheek, and thanked her for bringing Lidiya home. The next words out of Nas’ mouth were in another language. Although she spoke softly, the words sounded harsh. Sasha added to the conversation, and Lev responded easily. I couldn’t be sure, but I thought they might be talking about me. When the three of them turned to look at me, it became clear I was right.
Rude much, guys?
Lev kissed his daughter’s head but spoke to me. “You need something to wear tonight, and I’m afraid the clothes you have aren’t appropriate. Nastasia will take you shopping. Buy whatever you need.”
Buy clothes? With what? Love? “In case you hadn’t noticed, I don’t have any money.”
His brow rose. “I know you don’t. Nastasia has my credit card. You’ll buy whatever my sister thinks you need.”
The protest began before he even finished. “I can’t accept that. You’ve already done too much.”
Sasha eyed me closely, searching my face for a sign of deception, but I meant it. Nastasia’s hard eyes softened, but only slightly. Lev glowered at me. “I threw away your clothes with the intention of replacing them. At the very least, you’ll need a pair of jeans and a coat that fits.” He sighed, irritated. “You don’t even have any undergarments.”
Thanks for bringing that up in front of your whole family, asshole.
That was true though. He did throw out my clothes, leaving me with little to work with. My shoulders slumped. “Okay, well, how about we call it a loan? You can dock my pay until I’ve reimbursed you.”
All three of their faces took on a look of disbelief.
No one spoke until Lev let out a firm, “No.”
I stood taller, crossing my arms across my chest. “I’ll be paying you back, Lev, whether you like it or not.” After a short pause, I admitted quietly, “I don’t like owing people.”
Nastasia rolled her eyes and groaned, taking my wrist and dragging me toward the door. “Don’t bother, little girl. He won’t give in.”
Now, as we drove in silence, I slid down farther in my seat and sighed. “Any chance you’ll let me borrow some clothes and tell your brother we bought them?”
She looked at me then, and with her eyes covered with sunglasses that made her look like a model, she peeked over the top of them. I didn’t miss the slight curl of her lip. “I’m a whole foot taller than you, and you weigh less than me. Besides, I don’t lie to my brothers.”
“Great,” I muttered.
Another few minutes of silence then she started, “Listen, I don’t know you, so no offense and all, but if you fuck over my brother—”
I didn’t let her finish. My shoulders rigid, I cut in, “I haven’t known your brother for more than twelve hours, but in that time, he has been extremely kind to me, and I would rather eat my own tongue than do something to hurt him.”
Silence.
“Not many women would have the lady balls to speak to me so boldly, let alone cut me off.” Her lips pursed in surprise.
Perhaps it was a compliment, but I was still pissed at her assumption. “Your brother seems like a smart man. And he’s always a step ahead of me. I’d like to think he knows what he’s doing, even if I don’t know why he’s doing it.” I kept it real. “Your brother doesn’t know it, but he saved my life.”
She turned back to the road, indicated left, and turned into a mall parking lot. “I will beat you bloody if you do anything to make him regret that.”
Placing my chin on my knuckles, I looked out of the passenger window and grumbled, “Got it.”
The clothing store Nas took me to was unlike anything I’d ever seen before. Upon entering, we were served champagne, which I sipped once before putting it down, because it tasted like a thousand smarmy assholes. The clerk stood by, assessing me as Nas told her what I needed.
I was shoved into a dressing room that smelled of wildflowers and was the size of a single bedroom, with three outfits in hand. As soon as I undressed, Nas pulled the door open and stepped inside.
Squeaking, I used my arm to cover my boobs and hissed, “What the fuck are you doing?”
She snorted. “You got nothing I haven’t seen before, kulka.” At my clear panic, she rolled her eyes. “Relax, Max. I just wanted to see how the clothes fit.”
“Turn around,” I ordered.
She watched me closely. “Jesus.” She finally turned. “Prude much?”
Reaching for the closest dress, I threw it over my head. “You can turn around now.” I looked at myself in the mirror. The dress was black, tight, and undeniably sexy, but… “This isn’t me.”
Nas stepped closer, pulling at the garment, her brow furrowed. “I think that’s kind of the point, right?” She stepped back, assessing the dress on me. She shook her head. “No, no. Not good. Try another.”
She turned before I could ask her to and I was grateful. I took off the black dress and tried on the white one. In very much the same style, tight and tailored, but this one had a pencil styled bottom. I liked it.
From the way Nas smiled, she liked it too. “Yes. Put it in the yes pile.” After trying on all the other clothes, it was clear that nothing else looked good on me. Nas cracked under the pressure, growling, “You’re so fucking thin. You look sick.”
It was said in anger, and I knew I shouldn’t have taken it to heart, but I did. Turning my back to her, I hid my shining eyes, blinking away tears of shame. I knew what I looked like. I didn’t need reminders. The way I looked made me sick. I know I looked ill. I felt ill. Did she think I had a choice?
“Hey,” she uttered softly then awkwardly added, “sorry.” I nodded, still facing away from her. She sighed. “I’ll have this wrung up and we’ll try somewhere else, okay?”
The latch of the door closed gently behind her, and I quickly changed into my too-big jeans, scruffy white tee, and Lev’s oversized sweater, slipping on my flip-flops. From outside the door, I heard Nas talk to the clerk. “We’ll take this one. The rest we’ll think about.”
“Very good,” the clerk stated. “That will be $849.00. How will you be paying today, miss?”
Before Nas could respond, I flew out of the changing room in a rage. “Are you out of your goddamn mind?”
The clerk sniffed with derision while Nas glared openly at me. “The hell is your problem?”
“No!” I shouted. Looking directly at the clerk, I spat, “That dress is not worth that much money. Do you know how many starving kids you could feed with $800.00? Do you?” My voice shaking, I muttered, “Shame on you.”
Without waiting for a response, I made my way out of the uptight boutique, my feet rushing to get somewhere—anywhere away from there. I made it a short distance away before Nas came running after me.
“Yo! Wait up, you little fucktard.”
“Piss off,” I turned my head, hissing.
She caught up to me thanks to her ridiculously long legs. “So the kitten has claws.” She grinned. “We might get along after all.”
We walked side-by-side, and patiently, she let me walk off the anger. She chuckled and I side-eyed her. “What?”
Stopping, she laughed harder, clutching her stomach and wiping away tears of mirth. When she got herself under control, she snickered, “You should’ve seen the face on that stuck-up bitch after you walked out.” She straightened herself, placing a hand to her chest, and imitated the store clerk, “‘Well, I never!’”
I couldn’t help it. I snorted. I laughed softly, then harder, until I was hooting in hilarity. “At least I gave her something to talk about with her stuck-up friends.”
We came across a bench and I sat, Nas taking the place beside me. “So,” she began, “what are we going to do about the clothes situation?” I opened my mouth, but she held her palm up to stop me. “Before you come out swinging, we’re going to have to compromise.”
I bit the inside of my lip, chewing on it while I thought up a suitable solution. With a sigh, I swung my arm out in the direction of the boutique. “I don’t need stuff like that. I wouldn’t spend that much on principle alone. You know how long I could’ve lived on the streets with $800.00?”
Her face softened, as did her tone. “How long have you lived on the streets?”
“Since I was seventeen.” I quickly calculated. “I’m twenty-four now, so around seven years.”
She nodded slowly. “You never applied for help or housing?”
I shook my head.
“Why?” she enquired.
I glanced at her. “Honest answer?”
“Nothing but.”
“Takes about eighteen months to two years to get placement. It got real bad for me.” A small shrug then I took it deep. “I guess I never expected to live that long.”
Nas turned away from me then, keeping her eyes on the ground, contemplating something I couldn’t quite put my finger on. We remained in a comfortable silence, enjoying it immensely, when she spoke. “Okay, so where are we going next? We need to get you something to wear tonight.”
I huffed out a long breath then smiled. “Any thrift shops around here?”
Her brow rose. “I wouldn’t be caught dead in one of those, let alone wearing clothes that someone else owned.” She quickly added, “No offense.”
“None taken.” My smile turned into a grin. “Give me an hour. I’ll bet I can even find something for you.”
She scoffed. “Not bloody likely.”
My smile was cat-like. “Want to make a bet?”
Our trip to the thrift shop lasted almost two hours, and by the end of it, Nas was a convert. As promised, I found something even she couldn’t deny was amazing. She snatched up the Italian leather cropped jacket, and when I took it to the counter, I managed to talk the price down to thirty dollars. Nas watched with wide eyes, clearly impressed. She later told me that retail on a jacket like that would’ve cost a minimum of $400.00.
I had to admit I did well under the circumstances. Some of the clothing I chose were slightly big on me, but I planned to put on a few pounds and fill out the weight I had lost over the past year. I settled on a few retro t-shirts, a pair of blue jeans, a pair of black jeans, a pinstriped black pencil skirt, a white blouse that smelled a little like a grandma’s closet but looked classy and feminine, a black shirt, an off-white sweater (also too big), and a pair of bright yellow pajamas, which still had tags on them.
After we left with bags in hand and Nastasia in a considerably better mood, I asked her to take me to a local superstore where I could get underwear, socks, a few cheap pairs of heels, flip-flops and sneakers, and a toothbrush. Nas helped me pick bras in my size, and after looking at the sorry state of my body, she vowed to put some meat on my bones, assigning Ada to keep me fed. As we were leaving, we passed the cosmetics counter, and Nas told me to choose the basics, asking me if I knew how to do my own makeup.
I smiled to myself. “There was a mall a few blocks away from my alley. Every now and again I’d go down there. There was a sweet lady working cosmetics, and she must’ve known I didn’t have the money to spend, because she would sit me down and teach me how to apply my own makeup, telling me I could come in anytime to use the testers. So eventually, I learned.”
Choosing the appropriate shade of foundation proved difficult, as I was so pale, but Nas helped, picking out a light blush, black eyeliner and mascara, a palette of eye shadows, and assorted colors of lip gloss.
I was done.
As we walked to the car, I asked, careful not to gloat, “How much did we spend all together?”
Nas attempted to glare at me, but her eyes were amused. “Just over a hundred eighty dollars, smart ass.”
A hundred and eighty dollars.
I would pay it all back. It didn’t matter how long it took me.
As we drove, Nas caught me yawning. She nudged my shoulder. “Hey. Don’t you dare fall asleep. There’s one more stop we need to make.”
Mid-yawn, I croaked out, “I’m so tired.”
“You can have a nap when you get back to the house. You’ll probably need it. Your shift will likely finish around two a.m.”
I would need a nap. I wouldn’t make it until two a.m. without sleep.
“Where are we going?”
She smiled slyly. “You’ll see.”