Valentina awoke on Thursday in Adam’s arms. She readied for work while Adam dressed and made coffee. She would miss this interaction. Miss these little rituals they had developed in such a short time. Though that morning, not a word was exchanged as they prepared to leave. In the car on the way to work, Val tried to break the silence.

“What do you have planned for today?” she asked with fake enthusiasm.

“Errands,” he said in a short tone as he pulled to the curb to let her out.

She didn’t hear from Adam all morning until he texted her before lunch saying he wouldn’t be able to meet her for lunch. Val was shocked. He had a whole day to finish up last-minute things and he couldn’t spare the time for lunch?

As much as they had struggled to see a way through the distance, she thought they had ended on the same note. She thought that they agreed about wanting to work it out. Canceling lunch felt like a slap in the face. Perhaps Val had only thought they were on the same page about the relationship. Maybe Adam was feeling more pessimistic than she had gathered.

When Adam arrived to pick her up at the end of the day, he was quiet during their ride. Val tried to make small talk about his day, but after receiving one-word answers to her questions, she stopped trying.

They arrived home, and Adam retreated to the couch with his laptop. Val went to the bedroom to change out of her work clothes. A run was just what she needed. She put on her running capris, favorite t-shirt, and bright shoes.

“I’m going out for a run,” she told Adam.

“Great,” he replied with all the enthusiasm of a funeral. She closed the door behind her and used those three miles to try to clear her head.

During her run, she turned the situation over and over in her head. Was she reading too much into Adam’s behavior? He said that he wanted to continue on with Val but didn’t know how. Not knowing how and admitting to the difficulties of a long-distance relationship was miles away from not wanting to see each other any longer. Other couples surely have overcome distance in their relationships—why couldn’t they become a success story?

She tried to think of other ways to close the distance. She thought she could be patient between visits, between calls. If this relationship were so important to him, would he be able to wait?

She came back to the apartment sweaty and agitated. The run had done nothing to solve the problem or present any new ideas. In fact, just the opposite. The time in her head had allowed her to inflate the fact that he was being distant and silent. Was he doubting the relationship? Was she not worth the effort?

Adam was still ensconced on the couch, tapping away at his laptop. Valentina closed the door forcefully and faced him.

“What is the deal?” she asked. “First, no lunch. Now, you’re hardly looking at or speaking to me. What the hell?”

“What do you want from me, Valentina?” he asked, shutting his laptop and pushing it aside. “I don’t see a way out of this. Even if we do long-distance, what possible future can we have? Maybe we just chalk it up to a fun time and move on with our lives.”

“Just a fun time? That’s all this was to you? I have had flings before and I have nothing against them, but you and I both know this is different. You cannot look into my eyes and tell me that you see me as a fling.”

He barely glanced up at her. “No, I thought this would be more than a fling. But what future is there? I’m headed back to Africa and you have a life here. We cannot sustain a relationship seeing each other twice a year with some random emails in between. And even if we do that, what happens then? Are you willing to give up your life to move to Rwanda for us to be married? Have a family in a third-world country?”

“Don’t put words in my mouth. I have no idea what the future holds. I do have a life here, but you said yourself that you don’t know what you’ll be doing in the future. What if you came back in a couple of years? Isn’t what we have worth trying to keep going for a couple of years?”

He shook his head. “I can’t commit to that. I might come back; I might not. Rwanda fills a place in me that nothing else has. I want to be there as long as I need to be. Only when it isn’t part of my soul any longer can I see myself coming back to the States, but when is that? Two years, two decades?”

“So, that’s it? Just like that. We each find someone that makes us happy, happier than we’ve been in a long while, and it’s just a fling. No way to keep it going, just pfffft, done,” Valentina practically shouted. She was growing madder by the moment. Not only was this relationship being taken away from her when she had hardly realized how much she wanted it, but his lack of desire to try was undercutting her confidence.

“Yes, I guess it is. This has been wonderful. It will not be easy to move on, but perhaps it’s for the best. For both of us.” He sighed. “Maybe it’s like a Band-Aid. It will be painful to rip off, but doing it quickly is better than dragging it out. This way, we can both move on.”

“I think you are full of shit. This only highlights how you truly felt about me. If I’m not worth even trying to hold onto, how could you have ever cared about me?” she shouted.

He leaped off the couch and put his face very close to hers. “Do not tell me how I feel. I am constantly surprised by how strongly I feel for you. In such a short time, you have managed to become firmly planted in my heart. More than I am willing to admit. Do not question that,” Adam growled.

Valentina crushed her lips to his. He grabbed onto her arms, and they began tearing the clothes off of each other. He pulled off her sweaty shirt and kept kissing her. He picked her up, and she wrapped her legs around his waist. He carried her into the bedroom and threw her on the bed. He stripped off her pants and panties. He whipped off his shirt and unbuttoned his pants before falling on top of her again. He kissed her as if he couldn’t get enough, as though she were air to a drowning man, food to a starving person.

Valentina pulled at his pants until they were most of the way off, and he kicked them off the rest of the way. Their frantic movements said that neither of them wanted slow or gentle. This was them claiming each other. No one could keep them apart. Adam plunged into her in one thrust. She called out his name. She met each of his hard pushes with her hips, moving faster and harder with him. She scratched his back with her nails, and he yelled in pleasure.

He held onto her hips as he continued to drive into her. She panted and moved as he pleasured her. She could take this, take this and more. She loved all the parts of him, rough, gentle, easy, hard; it was all hers. They both climaxed at the same moment, Valentina shouting with joy as she broke apart into waves of light. He shuddered and moaned as his orgasm took over.

He collapsed on top of her, sweaty from their efforts. She held him. Neither spoke a word. How could they deny what they felt? Deny what this was?

He lifted his head and looked out over the clothes scattered across the floor.

“That is not where I thought this evening would go,” he said lightly. He eased off of her and picked up his clothes. “I’ll go get us something to eat.” He put on his pants and shirt and went to the living room to find his shoes. Valentina lay in the bed watching him leave. When the door closed behind him, she let her pent up tears fall. As much as she felt for him, could she convince him that they had a shot?

Adam came back a short time later with Thai food from the place around the corner. They didn’t talk much as they ate. After they finished, Valentina cleaned up the remnants of their dinner while Adam returned to his laptop on the couch. Valentina read in the bedroom. When she got too tired to keep reading, she readied for bed and lay down on her side of the mattress.

She fell asleep but not deeply. She woke when Adam came to bed a while later. He got under the covers silently and fell asleep facing the wall. Despite it being a queen-sized bed, Valentina felt like there was a mile of distance between them.