Chapter 14
Billie’s thighs were sore as she sat behind Slayer on his bike, her hair flying in the wind. They were only a couple of miles away from the clubhouse and the butterflies in her belly threatened to make her faint, she was so nervous. This wasn’t a fucking frat house she was going to, this was an outlaw MC clubhouse and there was no way she could prepare herself for it.
Her hands gripped his waist tightly, and she wasn’t so sure she’d be able to let go once they did arrive. She was scared to relax, unsure if she really could, but she wanted to make Slayer proud of her. She wanted to fit in, for him. The last thing she wanted was for him to regret bringing her with him.
They pulled off the main road and began driving down a more isolated road that wound up and around the mountain. She hadn’t expected to be so far off the grid, but she supposed it made sense. How else would get they away with their illegal activities? It made sense to her even if she didn’t understand exactly what they did.
That doesn’t really matter now, does it?
Billie wanted to convince herself that it didn’t, but she couldn’t take anything off the table just yet. She hadn’t even met the rest of his club yet, and she was trying not to be judgey about it. This was his life, the place he chose to call home, and he wanted to share it with her. The least she could do was give him and them a chance…
They came to a stop outside a large gate with barbed wire, a fortress surrounded by tall trees and thick forestry that she found enchanting all on its own. Billie wondered who’s idea it was to use this land to hide away in, because she wanted to commend them on a job well done. It was perfect.
Slayer came to a rocking stop outside the front of their ‘clubhouse,’ a moderately sized building lined with ceiling to floor windows that let in all kinds of natural light that Billie thought was pretty.
The architecture didn’t really match the idea of them that she had in her head, but what did she know? She wasn’t an outlaw expert, so she couldn’t really say that this would be any different than any other MC clubhouse. Slayer glanced back at her as he turned off his bike, a proud smile on his face.
“Welcome home, baby!”
Home…
Home had always been their little house back in Georgia. For the longest time, Billie didn’t really need to travel too far from it, even though her soul practically craved adventure. She’d been too wrapped up in taking care of Laura. She’d been too wrapped up in hating Slayer for leaving them behind to follow his own adventure.
People flooded the parking lot around them, mostly men and women wearing matching cuts and jackets, or vests with the Seven Deadlies’s logo on it. All of the women smiling at her were beautiful, including the ones who were half naked. She wasn’t too excited to see that, and she made a note to ask Slayer about that as soon as she could.
An older man stepped forward with long dark hair hanging in his face and a very interesting nose ring. He glanced between the two of them and waited for Slayer to help her down from his bike, his hand on her back. The older man held his hand out to her.
“I’m Ox, and this is my MC. It’s nice to finally meet you, Billie.”
Billie couldn’t hide the fact that she was a little intimidated to meet the president of an outlaw MC, especially one that was the home for the man she loved. Slayer looked at her and nodded, almost like he was urging her on.
“It’s nice to meet you too, Ox. Thank you for allowing me to come stay here with you,” She said politely. It felt foreign and weird and Billie hated the formality of it all, but she had no idea what the boundaries were for a club like this.
Ox smiled kindly at her, his upper lip twitching slightly as he released the hold he had on her hand. Slowly, he started to laugh before he glanced at Slayer and then back at her.
“Woman, you better get comfortable. We don’t have much room for politics on a bloody lot like this one, okay? Relax, be yourself, and enjoy yourself. You may not know it now, but this place is filled with people who are one big family. A family that you’re a part of, now. We accept you,” Ox told her.
Billie’s eyes widened slightly and Slayer’s fingers rubbed across her back tenderly as he leaned down to kiss the crown of her head.
“Listen to him, baby. This is your home, now. Let me introduce you to the rest of the family.”
The smile on Slayer’s face said it all; he was beyond happy, and she wanted to be that happy, too. So, she nodded her head eagerly and turned to meet everyone else. There was a man with a scarred face standing close to her, and he held out his hand.
“My name is Prettyboy, and this is my old lady, Esme.” Esme was a gorgeous brunette with laughing blue eyes and a big smile on her pretty lips.
“Hi! Nice to meet ya! I like making new friends, and I can tell we’re gonna be friends,” She said as she stuck her hand out and wiggled her fingers. Billie smiled back at her, liking her already, and when she grasped her hand, Esme yanked her into her arms and hugged her.
Another woman with blonde hair and severe blue eyes came through the crowd and pointed at a tall, wide man beside her.
“This is my man Fury and my name is Rayna. That little nugget terrorizing that ginger giant over there is our baby girl, Flora,” She said with a wink.
Billie released her hold on Esme and accepted the hug Rayna had waiting for her. Fury smiled down at her and nodded in her direction before their little girl came waddling over, the ginger giant still holding her hand.
“My name is Green, and my wife, Emily, is the blue-headed angel over there,” He said with a wry grin. Billie took the time to glance in Emily’s direction, who was busy arguing with a dark-headed man.
“That’s Torch, he’s just givin’ her a hard time. That’s what they do,” Green said as he held out his hand. Billie shook it and was surprised when the little toddler held her hands out towards her to be picked up. Billie looked to Rayna and Fury to make sure it was okay before she picked her up.
They both nodded, smiling all the while, as Billie lifted the tiny girl into her arms and cradled her close against her chest. She looked at Billie for a long moment before she slowly began to a smile, a few teeth poking out at her. Flora was beautiful and Billie made sure to tell her parents just how pretty she was. Slayer smiled proudly at her, like he was impressed with how well she was doing so far, and it made her insides warm.
“So, how badly were the people hurt?,” Billie asked.
“Hurt?,” Ox asked.
“Yeah, in the accident in town. Slayer told me that you needed him to return quicker than you both thought because he has a ton of work in the shop to do,” She said nonchalantly as she nibbled on the finger Flora was trying to feed her.
Ox looked at Slayer and then back at her before he ran a hand through his hair.
“No one was seriously injured, mostly a lot of minor repair work, but it’s a heavy load. Thanks for being understanding about cutting your little vacation short,” He said easily.
Billie was still smiling when she shrugged, “No problem, I know how it goes. Things happen, that’s life.”
Slayer cleared his throat.
“We’ve been riding for a long time, do you mind if we catch up later? I want to show her to our room and get settled in, get some rest.”
Ox peered at him in a way that made her slightly nervous, because the tension between the two seemed to rise a few degrees, and she really hoped it wasn’t because of her. The last thing she would want to do is cause problems because she got in the way just by being there. Ox nodded but he added, “Church tonight. Get your ass there, and don’t act like you don’t know why you’re in trouble.”
Slayer looked well and embarrassed as he walked away, glancing over his shoulder to call after Billie when she stayed behind, still holding Flora. Rayna looked between them as well as she reached for Flora.
“Nice to meet all of you,” Billie said softly as she moved to follow after Slayer.
“Nice to meet you!,” Rayna called as she waved.
The rest of them waved and nodded, smiling in her direction as well, but Billie could feel that something was off. Something that she wasn’t quite sure she understood, but she could feel the tension in the air, thick like molasses. Slayer was hiding something, she knew it, but what?
As she stepped into the clubhouse, she took a second to survey her surroundings. The expensive furnishings also went against every idea she had about a clubhouse, but the paint job and décor? Well, this place looked like a certified hotel, if she had to make an observation. Much nicer than she expected, different, but she liked that. Billie liked the fact that it was clean, well kept, and not filled with fat, sweaty bikers trying to paw at her ass.
“Over here,” Slayer said as he nodded towards the right side of the hallway. Billie kept up his pace, pausing outside the door he began to unlock halfway down the hall. She waited until it was partially open before she kicked it open and waited for him to step inside.
“Spill your fuckin’ guts, slayer. What’s going on? And, don’t try to lie, either. I’ll be able to tell this time, I’m payin’ damn close attention to ya.”
Slayer sighed and ran a hand through his hair, before he slowly shook his head. He opened his mouth once, twice, but no sound came out.
“What? What is it?”
He looked up at her, and Billie was surprised by the fear she saw. Slayer was scared of something, but what? What could be so bad?
“This place ain’t how I explained it to ya. I…left some stuff out,” He began.
Billie placed her hands on her hips, but she had a really bad feeling in the pit of her stomach, and her gut was never wrong.
“Go on.”
He turned away from her, something that she didn’t appreciate, and it only served to prove to her that he was full of shit. Most men were, and he wasn’t any different. What could she expect from someone that had already done his best to tear her apart when she didn’t have that much left to give him?
“Outlaw doesn’t exactly mean bad boy in these parts, Billie. It means a hell of a lot more than that, okay? We don’t just ride bikes, we do a lot of other shit too, and ain’t all of it clean.”
Billie had no fucking clue what that meant, so she asked him to explain that. To give her something, something that wouldn’t make her think that he’d swindled her just like he had six years ago.
“Tell me the fucking truth, Slayer. For once, just let me make the decision for myself. Only I know if I can truly handle it, and it ain’t fair of you to make that choice for me!,” She said angrily.
“Fuck, Billie! This ain’t some game, okay? This shit is serious, and I need to know that you’re committed to me before I disclose any of it to you. I need to know that you’re in this with me, or I can’t give you anything!”
Slayer slammed his palms into the wall above his head, and she jumped at the loud noise. Billie walked towards him and spun him around, her palms colliding with his chest.
“So, that’s how this is gonna go, huh? Me moving wasn’t enough for you? What do you need, a contract signed with my blood? What’s so damn hard about just being honest?”
“It ain’t that simple,” He argued again. Billie screeched under her breath and pushed him again, her long hair falling out of its bun as she stepped back from him, her arms spread.
“Make it that fucking simple, or I walk anyway. Your choice.”
Slayer pierced her with a glare before he turned, his gaze straying out the window. Billie didn’t exactly have the patience to deal with anymore baseless stories, especially if everyone else on the lot knew something that she didn’t. Which, judging by the way they’d quieted and stared when she asked about the accident in town, they did.
“Start talking, Slayer. You always have somethin’ smart to say, so open that mouth of yours, and speak.”
“I’ve bloodied more than one mouth for talkin’ to me like that,” He said softly.
“Oh yeah? Is that supposed to make me scared?”
He laughed under his breath and she had no idea why, or how, their little trip had turned into something so violent and volatile in the matter of a few minutes. No one had ever been able to spark her temper like he had, though. Slayer knew every button to push, the exact time to push them, and how hard. She hated it, but at this point in time, all she wanted was the truth.
“Don’t let the kitty get your tongue now, even though I know how much you like pussy, Slayer. Man up.”
He tilted his head to the side as he seemed to ponder this before he asked, “When did you become so vicious?”
“That soft, barefoot, woman you left cryin’ in the dirt ain’t here anymore. If you want soft and sweet, you got the wrong woman. I don’t know how to be like that anymore, and you of all people should know why.”
“I’m here now.”
“Think of it like failure to thrive, baby. You weren’t around when it mattered.”
His angry eyes blazed across her skin like a forest fire.
“Then what the fuck are we doing here, Billie? Why did you agree to come?”
“Why does it matter if you’ve been lying to me since we crossed state lines?,” She spat.
“Maybe I deserve that, maybe I deserve a lot, but Billie…I only lied to keep you with me. I didn’t do it to hurt you, even though the action was more selfish than not.”
“That’s a start. Keep talking.”
Billie had her arms crossed against her chest, and her hair was falling down in her face, but the fact that she kept her tears at bay was the true victory for her. She was proud of herself for standing her ground this time; she never used to do that.
“Murder, drugs, guns, espionage, you name it, we’ve done it. Do it. Billie, this club ain’t a group of men who sit around and discuss the glory days of ridin’ their Harleys. It’s a group of men who live and die by the logo on their backs. With us? You’re safer than you’ve ever been in your entire life. Every man and woman on this lot would lay down their life for yours, you get me?”
“No, I motherfucking, don’t! You lied to me, tricked me into coming with you, and now you’re tellin’ me that this ‘lifestyle,’ is more of a gang than a club? I mean, Jesus, you said outlaw, but you didn’t waste time explaining what that really meant! Why did you really get called back here, Noah?”
He winced at the mention of his real name before he said, “A rival MC ran a hit on Axel’s bar the other night. Killed a few locals. Basically started a war. Ox needed me to come home so we can create a game plan.”
“Where do I fit into this plan? The subservient little woman beside you who gets to be seen and not heard?”
“No! You’ve never been that woman to me, Billie, why would you start now? I didn’t want to break the truth to you like this, damn it!”
“Sounds to me like you didn’t want to break the truth to me at all, you fuckin’ liar! And, all those people out there know it, too! You made me look like a fool out there in front of all your family and friends. Nice, huh? What a great welcome, don’t ya think? Not even here for ten minutes, and I’m ready to leave,” She hissed.
Slayer flinched at that, but she didn’t care.
He’d lied to her, again, like she was afraid he would.
“I’m out,” Billie said as she waved her hand in his direction.
“You can’t go out there right now, Billie. It ain’t safe.”
Billie rolled her eyes and gestured towards him, “Ain’t safe for me in here, either.”
It looked like those words hit him hard and made a home on his skin, sinking in slowly. A balm to the all the burns she’d just laid at his feet, because that was the nicest thing she’d said since she found out he was keeping secrets.
Secrets, secrets, secrets, that was all he knew how to do anymore. It didn’t set the bar very high for their relationship, and as far as she was concerned, she couldn’t even chalk this up to a disappointment, because Billie hadn’t even gotten enough time between them to trust him again.
Six years, too many tears, and the man still can’t answer my prayers; only my worst fears.