I lie here in my hotel room, staring at the white ceiling, thoughts of how I’m going to get through today going through my mind. Lauren is one of the most important people in my life, yet one of the hardest to be around. It’s the main reason I took a job in North Carolina. I couldn’t handle being around her all the time if she wasn’t mine to hold.

Touch.

To call mine.

My mind wanders again, as it has been doing lately. This time, I recall that one day, back in high school…

I sit down on the bench and slide my helmet off as one of the student managers holds out a towel and water bottle to me. I grab both, and simultaneously take a refreshing drink as I sop the sweat from my face and neck. I’d just caught an incredible pass from Steven, running the ball in for a thirty-eight-yard touchdown and giving our team a seventeen-point lead with only four minutes left in the game.

I hear my name being called from behind me, by a voice I’d be able to pick out from any crowd.

Lauren.

I turn to find my best friend standing along the railing, a huge smile on her face as she waves at me. She turns, pointing to the back of her t-shirt that she’s decorated with my name and number. I laugh and wave back at her before returning my attention to the game in front of me.

We hold off the other team from scoring, closing out our season undefeated. We’re headed to the playoffs, but first, tonight, we’re all going out to celebrate.

After hitting the locker room for a shower and to change, I’m ready for a big juicy burger and shake from Louie’s, the dive restaurant that’s very popular in our small town.

“Hey, are you going to Louie’s tonight or just hanging out with Kristen?” I ask Steven, as we both finish getting dressed.

“I think we’ll hit it up before we ditch everyone to go find someplace quiet, if you know what I mean,” he tells me, bouncing his eyebrows up and down at me with a smirk on his face.

“Sounds good, bro. Is Lauren coming out with us?” I ask him.

“Hell if I know. I haven’t talked to her since third period. But if she does, keep an eye on her, please. I think Chad’s been trying to make a move on her.”

My stomach clenches at that thought. Chad better keep his hands off of her. He’s the biggest douche in our school, and his player reputation was well-earned.

We finally file out of the locker room and into the parking lot. It’s still pretty full of groups of students milling around as everyone makes plans for the rest of the night. I spot Lauren, leaning against my truck, talking with a few of our mutual friends.

“Hey, good game, guys,” Lauren calls out to me and Steven as we approach her. “You guys did great out there.”

“Thanks, Ren,” I tell her, giving her a one-armed hug as I sling my gear bag into the back of my truck with the other arm.

“Good job, babe,” I hear Kristen tell Steven before I hear the smack of lips colliding together.

“Are you coming out with us tonight?” I ask Lauren, quiet enough that only she can hear me.

“Yep. I’ve been looking forward to it all day,” she tells me with that giant smile on her face.

I can’t help but break out into my own huge smile.

“I’m glad you’ll be there.” I squeeze her once more before I drop my hand from her shoulder and let her go.

We end up with a huge group at Louie’s, and after finally getting to order, I find a booth that’s just being vacated and snag it for us. Lauren follows shortly behind me and sits down to my left, while Steven and Kristen take the bench across from us once they finish ordering.

The entire time we’re eating, I’m very aware of every time Lauren and I brush accidentally against each other. A small brush of our hands as we each reach for our drinks at the same time, or our hands grazing each other’s when we’ve rested them on the bench. That time, I linked our pinkies together and squeezed hers, tossing a wink her way when she looked at me with those questioning eyes of hers. Always so full of life, yet still so naive.

Steven and Kristen ditch us, and the atmosphere around us changes. Our simple touches from before, all of a sudden don’t feel so innocent.

Lauren turns toward me as I turn to her. No words are spoken between us as we both stare each other down. Our heads slowly start to move closer to each other, almost of their own accord. I reach up a hand to cup her cheek, feeling like I’m in a dream, finally about to kiss the one girl who’s always been out of reach to me.

The one girl who I’ve always wanted but could never have.

With our faces inches apart, our connection is snapped when Steven bangs on the window, effectively breaking the moment between us.

All I can do is laugh. The moment is gone; I just have to hope we get another one like it soon.

Lauren just laughs at her brother’s antics and shrugs at me when I turn back to her.

“Let’s go!” she suggests, grabbing my hand and pulling me out of the booth behind her.

I let her, not only because I want to keep an eye on her tonight if she ends up at one of the parties about to go down, but because I’d follow this girl anywhere.