CHAPTER 16
Harper
A fter Max left, I grabbed a cup of coffee and a blanket and headed out to the front porch. As I sat there looking out at the sun reflecting off the ocean, I thought back to my last few days with Max. It all seemed so surreal. I’d spent so much time missing him, thinking I’d never see him again, and it was hard to believe that he was really back in my life. I was thrilled, but at the same time, I wasn’t being naïve about the situation. I knew we still had huge obstacles to overcome, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little scared. Actually, I was terrified. There was so much about Max and his new life that I didn’t know. When I asked him about his job and the man he worked for, he was vague, at best. I had no idea if what he was doing was dangerous, or if he was simply installing security cameras like the one he installed at my cabin. I doubted it was that simple, especially after the phone call he’d just received. The disturbed expression on his face spoke volumes, and he wouldn’t have left so quickly if something hadn’t been wrong. While I was curious about his new found career, it was just one of the missing pieces to the puzzle.
The cold air was starting to get to me, so I took my empty coffee cup and went inside. When I walked into the kitchen, I grabbed my phone to see if I had any messages. As expected, I had several from Daniel, so I decided to go on and call him. He agreed to meet me in town at noon. I was feeling a little nervous about seeing him. I had no idea what I was going to say, so I called the one person who’d always given me the best advice, even when I hadn’t asked for it. As soon as she answered, I said, “Hi, Nat. You busy?”
“You’re kidding, right?” she groaned with exasperation. “I’m making the kids breakfast, I’m up to my eyeballs in dirty clothes, and my adoring husband just told me that he is leaving for three days on a work trip. So, yeah, I’m busy, but I’ve always got time for my girl. What’s up?”
“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bother you. I was just calling to say hey. I didn’t need anything.”
“Liar,” she remarked. “I can hear it in your voice. Something’s up, and you know it.”
“Well, there is a little something that’s on my mind.”
“That’s what I thought. Now, spill it.”
“You know how I rented that cabin at Whiskey Creek?”
“Yeah? How are you liking it?”
I sighed. “It’s really beautiful here, but I’m not getting as much work done as I planned. I’ve been … uh … a little distracted .”
“Distracted by what?” she asked. “You’re out in the middle of nowhere, right?”
“Yes, but I went into town for dinner the other night … and I ran into Max.”
The line went silent for several seconds before she shrieked, “What? Max! As in Max Lanheart?”
“Yep. The one and only.”
“Holy shit-balls, Harper! You’ve got to be kidding me! Wait a minute.” I heard her scuffling around the house and then suddenly a door slammed behind her. “Okay. Tell me everything.”
After I told her everything , I expected her to have some infinite words of wisdom, but all I got was silence. When she didn’t respond right away, I finally asked, “Well?”
“I just can’t believe it,” she replied sounding completely befuddled.
“Neither can I … especially after all this time.”
“What does he look like?”
“It’s Max , Natalie. He looks the same, only better. It’s hard to explain.”
“So, he’s still hot?” She laughed.
“Oh, yeah. He’s definitely hot. My lord, just looking at him makes me want to do very bad things … very, very bad things.” I laughed.
“I think he’s always had that effect on you.”
“Yeah, he has. I know it’s been years since we’ve been together, but it’s like we’ve never been apart.”
“But you have.”
“I know.”
“And Harper … you have to remember that he left you high and dry after you’d just lost your brother. That was an asshole move, girl,” she griped.
“Yeah, I know, but I told you his reasons why.”
“I know, and even though he pissed me off by doing that to you, I think he was right about some things. Brody’s death changed things. I know it changed you, and at the time, there wasn’t anything I could’ve done about it. You needed time to heal and find your own way through it. I’m not sure that would’ve happened if Max was around.”
“So, what about now? Do you think we could make this thing work?”
“I don’t know, Harper. A part of me wants to tell you to go for it and not worry about all the little stuff like his job and where he’s living. But … the other part of me wants to tell you to just walk away.”
“I don’t think I can do that.”
She sighed. “I know that. You’ve loved the guy for most of your life. There’s no way you’re going to walk away from him, but please be careful and guard your heart. I don’t want you to get hurt again.”
“I’ll be careful, but I don’t think I have to be. In my heart, I really believe him when he says he wants this.”
“Good, but you should know, if he fucks it up again, I’m going to kill him.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” I giggled.
“You sound really happy.”
“I am. I really, really am.”
“Then, go for it. If you two are meant to be, then it will work out. You just have to grow some balls and let it play out.” She teased. “And you need to talk to Daniel.”
My stomach sank at the sound of his name. “I know. I’m meeting him today so we can talk about it.”
“I kind of feel sorry for the poor guy. He never stood a chance.”
“No, he didn’t, and I really don’t want to hurt him by all this. None of it is his fault.”
“Umm … I don’t know. I think some of it might’ve been his fault,” she groaned sarcastically. “He’s a little clingy, and not in a good way.”
“Yeah. He was sweet … in that ‘you’re getting on my last nerve’ kind of way.” I joked.
“Exactly. And we both know you were never really into him. I know you tried to make it work, but come on … it’s Daniel.”
“I know.”
“When you see him, you’re gonna have to be firm with him. Don’t do that thing where you try to be nice. Daniel isn’t the kind of guy who’d understand nice. He’ll hang on forever thinking there’s still a chance things will work out.”
“Yeah.” I sighed. “You’re probably right.”
“I know I am. You’ve got to cut the guy off and be a little brutal about it.”
“You have a little bit of a mean streak. You know that, right?”
“Absolutely. I’m a teacher with three kids. What do you expect?” She giggled, and then I heard one of the kids screaming her name. “Damn, I gotta go, but keep me posted on things with Max.”
“I will.”
“And finish that damn book! I’m ready for my ending.”
“I’m on it.”
By the time we got off the phone, it was almost time for me to meet up with Daniel. I didn’t want to be late, so I got dressed, put my hair up in a ponytail, and headed out the door without bothering to put any makeup on. I could feel my nerves kicking in as I drove over to the park where we’d planned to meet. I was dreading it, but not because I wasn’t sure about ending this with him. I was sure about that. I was also sure that he wasn’t going to accept a simple goodbye. I’d tried that before, but he would always find a way to convince me to give things a chance. This time would be different. I knew what I wanted. I just had to find the best way to tell him.
When I pulled up into the parking lot, he was already waiting for me at one of the park benches. He was wearing dress khakis with a heavy, burgundy wool sweater, and his hair was perfectly combed to the side. I got out of the car, and he stood up and smiled as I headed in his direction. “Hi, Daniel.”
“Man, it’s good to see you,” he told me as he reached for me, giving me a big hug.
I pulled back and gave him a half-hearted smile. “Let’s sit down for a minute.”
He nodded and after we were both seated, he said, “I’m glad you called. I was beginning to think you’d forgotten about me.”
“I should’ve called sooner, but …”
“I know you’ve been busy, sweetheart. I understand.”
When the word sweetheart came out of his mouth, my entire body cringed. I was done with the chitchat, so I let out a deep breath and said, “We need to talk.”
“Okay.”
“I think you’re a really great guy, Daniel. You’ve been so good to me, and you mean a lot to me … But this thing between you and me isn’t going to work.”
His green eyes filled with worry as he asked, “What do you mean?”
“It’s time for us to go our separate ways. I know it’s hard, but in my heart, I know it’s the best thing for both of us.”
“No. You’re wrong. It’s not the best thing for us, and it’s certainly not the best thing for me,” he pouted. “I love you, Harper. I’ve done nothing but love you for months.”
“I know that, and I’m really sorry. I just don’t feel the same way about you.”
“No.” He shook his head frantically as he reached for my hands, gripping them tightly. “You’re not thinking clearly right now. You have so much on you right now with the book and all the deadlines. I know it’s overwhelming for you.”
I eased my hands from his grasp and shifted in my seat, trying to make a little distance between us. I took a deep breath, and tried to remain calm. “I’m thinking perfectly clear, Daniel. It’s over .”
“No.” He stood up and looked down at me. “Just give it a few days, and then we can talk.
“There’s nothing for us to talk about, Daniel,” I snapped. “I don’t want to see you anymore.”
“I can’t believe you’re really doing this! After everything we’ve been through.” A determined look crossed his face as he shouted, “It’s that guy, isn’t it? You’ve never been able to get over him!”
“You’re right. I’ve never gotten over him, and I don’t think I ever will.”
“He’s gone, Harper. It’s been ten fucking years. He’s not coming back. You need to get that through your thick head!”
I knew he was hurting, and I didn’t want to make it worse by arguing with him. “I know it’s hard right now, but some day you’ll see that this was the right thing for both of us, Daniel.”
As he stood there staring at me, I could see the anger building inside him. His cheeks flushed red and his voice trembled as he glared at me. “You’re going to regret this.”
I stood up and looked at him directly in his eyes and replied, “No, Daniel. I won’t. I could never regret doing the right thing.”
With that, I turned and walked back to my car. I could feel his eyes on me as I started my car and pulled out of the parking lot. I knew I’d hurt him. I just hoped in time he’d be able to see that I’d actually done him a favor. I could never love him, or anyone else for that matter. My heart belonged to Max. It always had, and it always would. When I got back to the cabin, I still felt a little anxious, so I decided to use my nervous energy to my advantage. After I cleaned up the cabin, I pulled out my laptop and spent several hours writing. I felt really good about how the book was coming along, and once I was done, I sent Claudia a message. I thanked her for my sweet gifts and let her know that I would be emailing her my latest chapters.
By the time I was done, it was getting late. It was well after dark, and I still hadn’t heard anything from Max. He’d said he didn’t know how long it would take, and I didn’t want to bother him, so I decided to relax with a hot bath, hoping that I’d hear from him before I went to bed. With my new bath soaps in hand, I headed for the bathroom and enjoyed a nice, long soak. After noticing my fingertips looked pruned, I lifted myself out of the tub, dried off, and put on my pajamas. As I headed back into my bedroom, the cold air caused a small shiver to run down my spine. The fire had gone out, but I was simply too tired to do anything about it. When my teeth started to chatter, I slipped into my soft, cozy bed and pulled the covers over me; once I was nice and toasty under the down comforter, my exhaustion set in and I couldn’t help but fall asleep.
I wasn’t sure how long I’d been sleeping when I heard a knock at my door. The noise startled me, especially since it was after one in the morning, but only for a moment. Thinking that it must be Max, I threw the covers back and rushed towards the door. Rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I peeked out the window and was relieved to see Max staring back at me. As soon as I opened the door, I could see how exhausted he was.
There were dark circles under his eyes and his voice was low and raspy when he spoke. “I’m sorry. I know it’s late and I shouldn’t have come, but …”
“Yes. You should’ve come.” It was freezing outside as I reached for his hand and pulled him inside the house. After I locked the door, I led him to the bedroom. “C’mon, get undressed and get in the bed.”
Once he was undressed and settled in, I curled up next to him. His arm slipped around me, pulling me close, and he let out a deep breath. “I’ve been waiting all day for this.”
“Me, too.”
“I want to spend every night …” His words were long and drawn out, like he was drunk out of his gourd. “Just … like … this .”
Before I had a chance to respond, the rhythm of his breathing became slow and deep, letting me know he’d fallen asleep. I turned to look at him and smiled. The worry lines were gone from his face, making him look so young and peaceful. I thought back to when we were kids, when I thought that we would always be together. Back then, I thought nothing could come between us, and together, we could survive any storm. Some might say I was wrong for believing that, but as I laid there next to him and felt the warmth of his body next to mine, I realized I was right—our love had survived the storm.