Chapter 24

Allison

I wiped my eyes at the bathroom mirror and tried to compose myself before going back out to talk to my mother.

“Your father is tucking Sierra in for a nap. She was so upset he left and said she hates Doug for ruining her life.” She naturally would blame her father, and I wouldn’t be able to defend him since he had started the drama that led to David leaving. Not that he deserved to be defended.

“She’ll be okay,” my mother said.

“I’m not so sure. She loves David, and he’s always been so good to her. I shouldn’t have lashed out at him, but I can’t believe what happened.”

“You didn’t want to see him attack Sierra’s father. It’s perfectly natural.”

“What? No.” I realized my mother hadn’t seen or heard what went down, and I debated on saying anything.

“Then what happened?” She took some of the dishes from the drying rack and put them away.

I was unable to think of a good excuse, so I knew the truth was the way to go, even if it shed a bad light on me for my previous actions. “He had the nerve to suggest Sierra is his daughter.”

My mother’s eyes widened. “Allison! Is that possible?”

I knew my mother didn’t want to think that I’d slept around, or that it was possible I wouldn’t be positive who Sierra’s father was, but then, who tells their mother about their sex lives at eighteen?

“We were together prom night.” She gave me a scolding glare. “Oh, please, Mom. What were you doing with Dad on prom night?”

Her face turned red, but she held out her hand as if to calm me down. “Allison, that’s right around the time you conceived Sierra! He’s not being unreasonable. Have you ever considered it?”

“I had my cycle the week after, and I wasn’t late until I’d been with Doug.” There was no way. I would have known.

“You can’t go by that. Did the two of you use protection?” It seemed my mother was hopeful.

I let out a sigh and plopped down into my chair. “No, we never have.”

“Never have?” My mother crossed her arms and leaned against the counter.

“Newsflash, Mom. We’ve been together a few times. He was my first love. Who else was I going to give my firsts to?”

Before my mother could react, the doorbell rang. “Maybe it’s him.”

“If it is, tell him to go away. I’m too shaken up to deal with him.” A moment later, I heard Katrina’s voice and let out a sigh of relief.

“Hey, did I come at a bad time?” Katrina looked around like a bomb was about to go off.

“No, and yes,” I said. “It’s never a bad time for you, but you did miss all of the excitement.”

“That’s me. The story of my life, starring Katrina Maxwell. You can watch it for free.” She hung her bag on the chair next to me and sat down. “So, tell me!”

“Doug showed up to give Sierra her bag, and David was here.”

“Did they get in a fight? Please don’t tell me I missed the chance to see Doug bleeding.”

“No, they didn’t. Doug actually threw a punch, but David pulled some military move on him, caught his fist and twisted it around behind his back. It brought him to his knees, which was really nice.”

“So, what’s with the gloomy face, and where’s Sierra?” Katrina glanced around to the living room and shrugged. “Did she go with her dad?”

“No. David lashed out at me. Said Doug was an asshole and wanted to know if Sierra was his daughter and I just kept it a secret from him.”

“I told you! Oh man!” She looked to my mother, who took out a few plates and brought them to the table. “I told her he was the father.”

“Mom’s kind of the last to know about prom night.”

“Don’t tell your father,” she mumbled as she sliced the pumpkin pie and served us each a slice. “It will upset him, and he really thinks the world of David.”

“Who just snapped my head off and accused me of knowing Sierra was his. Like I’d choose Doug over him.”

“You already did in a way, I suppose.” Katrina sliced through her pie and took a bite. “Mmm. This is so good. Thanks, Mrs. B.”

Mom gave her a half-hearted smile and took her own bite. “You need to get a test done, Allison. I guess we should have a long time ago.”

“I was with Doug two weeks after David went back to the Air Force. I had my period. I had no symptoms. With Doug, I knew right away. It was like a week later, and I was already starting to get sick. It has to be his.”

Mom let out a sigh. “Sounds to me like you were already pregnant when you were with Doug.”

Katrina nodded in agreement, still shoving her face with pie.

“I just can’t believe it,” I said.

“If I had known all of this, you’d have gotten a test done,” my mother said. “I should have been a better mother and known something was off. Then you wouldn’t have gotten mixed up with that asshole.”

I’d never heard my mother say ugly words, but her frustration was apparent. Katrina glanced at me and then looked down at her plate.

“How could I be so stupid? How come the doctors didn’t say something? Don’t they know these things?” This couldn’t all be on me.

“No, because it’s not an exact thing. Each woman carries their children differently. Did you tell the doctor you’d been with multiple people?”

“Jesus, Mom. It was David and then Doug, not both of them and a roomful of men. I didn’t think it was David’s, so I didn’t mention it. We went off the date we thought I conceived with Doug and that was that.”

“Sierra was born a week early. You could have carried her longer than term, most women do on their first babies.” She looked up and met my eyes. “Get a test.”

“I will, Mom.”

Katrina picked at her crust. “What are you going to do if it’s his?”

“I don’t know. He’s so mad at me. I didn’t expect him to lash out that way.”

“He must see himself in her. It’s the eyes.” Katrina reached out and touched my hand, squeezing it. “He probably just feels like he missed out. I’m sure he’s just upset in general, not mad at you.”

“He has missed out. If she’s his, he’s missed six years. Not only her birth but her first steps, her first tooth, crawling, bottles, diapers. I think of all the time Doug wouldn’t help me with her, but I know if David had been around, he would have. He would have been there for her first Christmas and birthday; all of them. He would have read her bedtime stories and spoiled her rotten.” I shook my head and scrubbed my face.

Mom cleared her throat and got up to get a glass of cider. “I think what you need to worry about is the legal ramifications. Doug could sue you. He’s been an asshole, sure, but he’s paid child support. He married you, supported you. You could say all because of the baby. You two wouldn’t have ended up together otherwise, and you know it.”

I hadn’t thought of that, but I wouldn’t put it past Doug to do something so dirty.

Katrina’s mouth hung open with shock. “Do you think he’d do that?”

“If her father is a DeVant, you can bet your sweet ass he’d do it.” My mom had a point. Being a DeVant would impact things in a big way. To us, the DeVants were just the people across the street, but to the rest of New York City and across the world, they were money.

“David would take care of her,” I said.

“He’d take care of you both,” Mom said. “He’s in love with you. I can see it in his eyes when he looks at you.”

“You didn’t see how upset he was. This is unforgivable.”

Katrina held up her finger. “You didn’t do it on purpose, Allison. If you’ve even done it at all. You can’t be sure until you take that test, and then if he’s the dad, you’ll deal with it. I bet he’ll marry you, and you’ll be a perfect little family.” She seemed so sure of it, but I wasn’t.

“Even if he doesn’t want to be with me, he’ll want to see Sierra. I’ll have to share her with him and send her off with him like I do now with Doug.”

“At least you’d know she’s in better hands,” my mother said. “It makes me cringe to see her going off with Doug. And the more she grows and looks like her mother, the resentment will grow, too.”

“That’s already happening. She was upset the other day because Cindy and her father said something about my looks; that I was ugly. And since she’s always hearing how much she looks like me and is like me, she put the two together.”

I hadn’t told my mother the details, but she knew it had gotten worse.

“I hope David is her father,” she said. “You’ll both be better off.”

“I’m not so sure. What if he resents the time lost and takes her from me?”

“No court would do that,” my mother said. “You know David wouldn’t. But I tell you what she would have. Missy would be her aunt, and she’d have a nice little family with cousins and a father who cares about her and her mother. That one has always loved you.”

I knew she was right. I needed to talk to David, but I needed to think some more and figure out how to tell him that he might be right and to apologize to him for not thinking it possible sooner. I had to let him know that I would have preferred him to Doug and to the life I’d had with him. Surely, he couldn’t feel like I’d have rather had all the pain and misery over him.

Katrina finished up her pie, and we chatted for a little while longer. My father had gone down to his chair sometime during our conversation and left Sierra upstairs in my bed to take her nap. Tired from a long, emotional day, I went upstairs to lay beside her, and when I walked into the room and saw her lying there, the covers pulled up to her little chin, where one little hand rested, and the other was high above her head stretched across the pillow, I couldn’t help but see the resemblance. Her deep, soulful eyes, though lidded, where the exact color and shape of David’s. The soft, roundness of her cheeks was pure DeVant, as well as her ears. How could I have not seen them before? They must have been glaringly obvious to David, and it was no wonder he’d gotten emotional. Seeing firsthand how Doug had no regard for Sierra, it was human instinct to be protective of your child, and even your child’s mother.

The minute Sierra met him, she was in love. She’d taken to him, perhaps by sheer instinct, and the two of them were already joined at the hip. I had to wonder if that’s why he’d been so quick to agree to Career Day. He’d wanted to get to know her, probably having his suspicions all along.

I’d thought the bond had formed quickly because of David’s charm, but now, I knew it had to be more.

I climbed into bed with her and tucked her close against me. She rested her hand on my arm. “Is it time to trim the tree, Mama?” she asked with sleepy eyes, eyes that were so much like David’s when she was tired that I knew exactly what the test would say.

“Not yet. Let’s rest a little longer.”

Without another word, she snuggled closer and put her little hand on my arm. I didn’t know how I was going to tell her, but I knew it wouldn’t be anytime soon, not until after the test confirmed things. Despite Doug being a hard person for me to deal with, he had been good to Sierra in many ways, and many children, no matter how many troubles they had with their real fathers, still loved them, deep down. Sierra wasn’t capable of true hate.

Either way, with all of this going down, my little girl would be affected, and it was all my fault.