Chapter 36

Bethany

Maybe she was overthinking it. A few weeks back he'd been more of an ass than ever, and she'd been fine with it. For some reason, she half-expected him to change simply because of the engagement, but she hadn't changed much, right?

She packed up and walked out of the conference room after everyone else had skipped off to dinner thirty minutes before. Damon had texted sometime just after lunch for her to meet him out at the street around seven. After a long day of trying to catch up to where everyone seemed to expect her to be, a hot bubble bath and TV sounded good, but that wasn't happening.

As long as there wasn't another fight to deal with, she'd be good. Too much more and she was liable to crack and chuck the ring at him. There was only so much someone could be expected to put up with, even someone head-over-heels.

She took the elevator down and stifled a yawn as she walked out of the building. A sleek black Mercedes much like Damon's sat parked in front of the building as other cars moved by in the street. Bethany clutched her bag in front of her and tried to appear casual as she looked around. If Damon were in the car, he needed to roll the damn window down.

As if on cue, it rolled down.

Her breath swept from her chest as he smiled, neither of them saying a word.

Don't cry. Don't cry.

The five o'clock shadow that dusted his chin and cheeks left him looking more rugged than she could handle. How physical attraction could wash over the aches and pains and make them momentarily better was a mystery that she was too tired to think through, but it worked its magic on her.

"Hi, pretty girl. I have the night off and was wondering if maybe you'd like to go to dinner? Maybe grab a drink at a piano bar after and let me twirl you around the floor a little? Dessert could be optional but might be fun. A long shower?"

"I thought you didn't dance unless forced to." A smile touched her lips as she trapped the pain of their roller coaster relationship deep inside of her.

"Only at a wedding or when-"

"Seducing a woman. I remember." She glanced down the street and shook her head. "I'm good, but thanks for the offer. I'm not looking for one night, but many. The guy who's supposed to come get me is, well, he's soon to be everything to me. I think." Tears blurred her vision.

So much for trapping it behind a cheeky facade.

He got out of the car and moved to stand in front of her, his expression loving and filled with concern.

"Baby. I'm right here. You know we have a lot to work through."

"And a ring doesn't change that. I get it." She reached up and wiped at her tears angrily. "I wish dinner and dancing were the cure-alls for the hurt inside of me, but it isn't."

"Can it be a start?" He touched the side of her face and licked his lips. "Please."

It wasn't a request.

"Yeah. Sure." She touched his hand before turning her face to kiss his palm a few times. "Stop shutting me out, and stop being a dick. I've kept up with your rules and your demands and your needs. Give back a little before this thing falls apart."

He nodded stiffly, obviously not liking the idea of her taking control of the conversation or directly addressing the issue.

His problem. If it falls apart, it won't be because I didn't give it my all.

She walked around him and got into the passenger's side of the car to find a pretty bouquet of red roses laying between the seats.

"What do you feel like for dinner? Seafood, steak, something else?" He picked up the roses and handed them to her. "For you."

"When did you have time to get these?"

"I made time." He reached over and touched her arm with the back of his fingers. "Let’s have fun tonight and try to leave all this angsty bullshit behind us for a while."

"I'll try."

"What can I do to change that from trying to doing?" He tugged at a strand of her hair before leaning into her seat and kissing her softly a few times. "Where's my girl under all this drama? Is she in there? I want her. I need her. Tell her to come out and have dinner with me."

She nodded, not willing to push it any further. "Okay."

"Good." He dropped back in his seat, clueless. "Now, where to?"

"Let's go to the steakhouse Erica was talking about in Jamaica."

"You wanna fly to Jamaica?" He winked at her and reached for her hand, pulling it up to his lips and kissing softly. "I know the one. It's one of the best in the world."

"Good." She pulled her hand from his and turned to look out her passenger's side window. "I heard it rains here all the time, but it hasn't at all today unless I missed it."

"You were trapped in a conference room all day." He brushed his fingers by her leg and pushed her skirt up a little before gripping her thigh softly. "You want me to stop by the hotel so you can put on something more comfortable?"

She glanced over at him and rested her hand on his, not wanting him to go any higher. The need to protect herself from whatever they were headed toward rolled through her violently.

"Yeah, that would be great actually." She forced a smile and reached to turn on the radio.

"You sure you're all right?"

"Yep. Just a lot on my plate right now." She crossed her legs in a way that forced him to pull his hand back. "I think the one thing I can't shake is why you wouldn't have told me about Bridget's sister coming to work at the firm. I guess it's really not my business." She shrugged and kept her voice soft and conversational, as if they were discussing the color of the drapes in a house. "It just shocked me to see her there with no clue of who she was or that she was coming."

"I get that." A tenseness entered his voice that didn't belong there. It should have been her that was tense over the situation. The omission of truth was the same as lying, or at least that's the lesson he'd taught over her punching Sadie in the face and not saying anything about it. How was this situation any different?

She pulled out her phone and texted Matt as Damon sighed softly and put both hands on the wheel, squeezing tightly until the leather creaked in protest.

Bethany: Where are you?

Matt: At the hotel. What's up? You need me?

Bethany: Yes. I'm going to tell Damon I have a stomach ache. I can't do this tonight. Can we go somewhere undercover?

Matt: My chest hurts over this, but yeah, I like undercover.

Bethany: Mine too, but I can't keep up this fake shit anymore. I'm hurt and I'm sure it's my fault, but I need to get away from it for the night.

Matt: Text me when you're free.

The phone rang on the car’s console, and Damon tapped it twice. Ben's voice filled up the car as they pulled up into the driveway of the hotel.

"Hey, boss man. We're all going to a great piano bar down the street from the office. You and Bethany should join us."

"Naw, man. We-"

"Just a second, Ben." She pressed mute on the dashboard. "You should go. My stomach is starting to get sick again. Seriously. Come back to me tonight, and we can catch up."

"No." His expression tightened further as anger burned across his face. "I'm coming up with you."

"No. Really. I don't want to be sick in front of you. I love you." She leaned over and kissed him, but he didn't return the gesture.

"Beth, I'm not letting you be sick alone. We're in this thing-"

"Go. I need some time to myself. I'll text you if I need something. Let me be gross in peace." She forced a laugh and grabbed her purse and got out of the car.

He sat in the car, staring out the front window as she turned to wave at him. Nothing. It wasn't until she was standing in front of the elevator with tears running down her cheeks that she realized that she left the flowers he got her sitting in the front seat.

"Fucking great."

***

"I think you guys are putting way the fuck too much pressure on yourselves. My God, you just got together three weeks ago." Matt dipped his chip into the bowl of hot salsa between them.

Bethany sucked down another drink of her frozen margarita before answering.

"I know. I keep telling myself that, but some of the little things he's done that have hurt me seem to feel so damn big. So big..."

Matt reached over and squeezed her hand. "So let's talk about something else. You and Damon will figure this shit out. You're too right for each other not to, okay?"

"Okay." She glanced down and forced the hot lump of regret in her chest to go back down. They would figure things out, maybe. Hopefully. "Did you ask Erica out?"

"No. She's a piranha." He laughed as Bethany gave him a look.

"She's a great girl and someone that you would-"

"I know. I've heard it a million times. No is my answer. I don't want a woman like her. Honestly." He shrugged. "She's beautiful and leaves my insides shaking with white-hot need, but she's not the kind of woman I want to tie myself to emotionally."

"Why is that?"

"She's like Damon. Strong, confident, a bitch and a half, and I love it. I would become her lap dog in public and put a collar on her in the bedroom. She would bring out the worst parts of me." He reached over and pulled Bethany's drink toward him. He took a drink and licked at the salt on the side before grimacing. "This tastes like shit."

"You lick the salt first, nugget-head." She laughed and showed him how to do it.

"I'll just stick to beer for now. Thanks." He lifted his beer in the air. "Things are going to work out. I promise."

"I hope so." She hit her glass against his and let Matt move the conversation to more relaxed, fun topics, which he did well.

***

Finding Damon asleep on the coach of the room when she got back that night was a little concerning. He had to know that she went out, but how long had he been in the room waiting for her?

The roses were in a vase on the desk, and a card sat beside them, unopened. Had he gotten it for her for their dinner date?

Guilt pumped through her as she opened the card and turned to face him. The soft sound of him breathing let her know that he was asleep. She glanced up from the card and let her eyes move along him as the moonlight spread across his sleek figure. He was in slacks and nothing else, his beautiful body like something out of a wet dream.

Beth,

Give me time, and I'll give you patience. Give me grace, and I'll give you trust. Give me your heart, and I'll treasure it forever. This isn't the end, but the beginning, right? Sure feels like the opposite is happening. Where are you tonight, baby? Is there someone else you'd rather be with than me? Who is he? How can I be more like him? Am I not enough?

There's so much to work through, but for me, you're it. I'm willing to keep pushing forward if you are. I hope you are, Beth, because despite it being three weeks, I love you.

D

She pressed her fingers to her lips as a sob lodged in her chest. There he was, the man she'd fallen in love with. He was tucked somewhere deep inside the asshole across the room.

After setting the card down and changing into a tank top and panties, she walked across the room and sat down on the bed beside him on the couch, brushing his hair back as tears rolled over her cheeks. It would be so easy to wake him up and make love to him for the rest of the night, to forget the hurt and work toward something better, but she couldn't force herself to do it. She'd never cheat on him, and though that was his main hang up, she shouldn't have had to convince him that she wasn't out with another man.

Well, no one other than Matt, and he didn't count.

She leaned over and kissed his head a few times as he grumbled and rolled onto his side, putting his back to her. She kissed his shoulder and got up, pulled the top cover off the bed and put it on him before getting in the over-sized bed beside him and trying to force herself to get some sleep. They had another long day on Sunday, and she needed to be on her toes. Otherwise, something told her that she'd have Delilah in her face, which wouldn't go over too well.

Wonder if she needs a nose job too.