****
“Great job in there today." Karen patted my back as we walked to the wash room just outside of the O.R.
"Thanks; you too. It felt good to save a life. I don't think I could ever grow tired of it." I washed my hands and let her dry them as my eyes shifted to the opening just behind her. Elizabeth stood watching us, a sweet smile on her beautiful face.
"I'm here for my shift. Where do you want me?" She walked in and patted Karen on the back. "You guys having a good day?"
"I want you with me. We're going to have to deliver some bad news to a family, and I think it's time that you took on that task. It's the worst thing we have to do by far, but it's something you have to get used to." I turned and wiped my hands on another set of paper towels as my heart constricted in my chest.
"I'm having a good day," Karen chuckled. "He's been incredibly moody, but I think you're used to that."
"I have not." I glanced over my shoulder and smiled at the older nurse. "You're just being sensitive today because it's your birthday."
Elizabeth let out a sweet yelp. "It's your birthday? Happy birthday! That’s great. Did we get a cake?"
I nodded and turned to face them as my eyes moved over her curvy frame. I knew what every inch of her looked like, felt like, tasted like. My pulse sped up, and every cell in my body screamed for me to cross the room and pull her into a passionate kiss.
Yeah, it was time for a change. She and I would have to talk later that afternoon after our shifts were over. I needed her to move to another mentor, or we had to stop fooling around. Hunger for a long weekend of feeling her pressed beneath me rode me hard, and I was close to breaking down and inviting her in fully. She wouldn’t appreciate it, and I wasn't ready for her rejection.
"It's chocolate, and it's in the breakroom. We'll get a piece after we talk to this family." I walked out of the O.R. and back to my office, expecting Elizabeth to follow me.
Parks was waiting in there when I approached, and I growled at him as I stopped short.
"What do you want?" I moved into the office as he turned.
"Well, hello to you, grumpy butt. Jeez." He sat down in the chair across from my desk and glanced up as Elizabeth moved to stand beside him. "Hey, Lizzy. You look hot today."
She rolled her eyes. "Hush. No one is in the mood for your antics."
"I second that." I sat down in my chair. "What do you need? I have a family to visit with, and it's not pretty."
"Aw, I'm sorry, man. I know how much you hate that shit." Parks stood up and slid his hands into his pockets. "We can talk later. I just need some advice."
"I have a few minutes now." I forced my expression to soften. There was no reason to reject the guy. He'd been too good to me, and like a little brother for the last few years. I was being a dick because I was struggling with indecision. It had nothing to do with him. The only issues were the fact that I was almost positive that his need to talk had something to do with his desire for my girl. Not good.
"Right. It's cool. I'll catch you later." He turned and walked out, not saying anything else as I let out a short sigh.
"What's going on?" Elizabeth closed the door behind her and moved around to my side of the desk, forcing me to turn in my chair so she could slide onto my lap. "You okay?"
Her arms wrapped around my neck, and I slid my hand up her back, cupping the back of her neck as I drew her close to me and pressed my lips to hers in a hungry kiss. I wanted her so fucking bad that I ached at the thought of it. She was addictive, and my drug of choice.
She pressed into the kiss and ran her nails rhythmically over the back of my neck as I made love to her mouth. My cock twitched to life and pressed against my scrubs painfully. She seemed to notice and reached down, rubbing her hand over my erection as she licked and sucked at my lips and tongue.
"I want you," she whispered against my mouth. "Take off tonight and let's go back to your place. You haven't let me come over since that first night. Why?"
I sat back and pressed my hand softly against her chest just above her breasts. "I don't want to talk about this right now. Let's go deal with the family and we can grab a coffee and talk afterward."
She nodded and got off my lap, her expression showing me that she felt rejected, which was the opposite of what I wanted her to experience.
"Yeah. Of course." She brushed her fingers through her hair before pulling it up in to a loose bun.
Just the smell of her drove me crazy, but there was nothing I was willing to do about it until we had a little bit of resolution. I prayed like hell that Peter would get back to me with some good news, and soon. My mood was souring more and more every day, and I knew I was going to hurt her, to push her away, but it was simply my defense mechanism, and it was already starting to churn.
"Alright. Here’s the file. Read it over and prepare as we walk down there." I handed her the file and opened the door.
"Aiden, are you upset with me? You've been a little edgy lately. Did something... I don't know... did something change?" Her face was a mask of indifference, but I could see pain in her eyes.
"No. I'm just struggling with a few things, but everything is fine. I promise." I reached out and touched the side of her face. "You do look hot today. Parks was right."
She nodded, but didn't return the smile that I'd forced onto my face. I moved out into the hall, and she walked slightly behind me, her head down as she scanned through the file. I kicked myself internally for being so damn flaky around her. It was tearing apart her confidence and affecting her as badly as it was me.
"You ready?" I glanced back as we stopped outside the patient’s door.
"Yep." She was all business, and didn't wait for me to open the door, but moved past me and opened it herself. "You don't need to come in unless you want to. I'm a big girl. I've got this."
I stood there as the door closed in my face. She was hurt, and she had a right to be.
I just had to figure out if I was going to reach out and help make the bleeding stop. I had to fix my own shit before I could help fix hers, though.
"Aiden, Peter wants to see you if you're free." Karen walked down the hall behind me and gave me a friendly smile.
"I am. Thanks." I turned and walked toward the front of the hospital, grateful for the reprieve, and yet feeling like a bastard for wanting one.