Tori Bellows didn't complain too much about life because she knew she had it pretty good. She had been raised in a first world country and had loving, doting parents. She'd gone to good schools, and she'd even gotten okay grades.

On top of all that, she was very personable and funny – she loved meeting people and making new friends. Laughter and conversation came easy to her. She was also attractive. She wasn't shy about her looks. At almost five-foot-eight with thick brown hair, warm brown eyes, an all over toasty tan, long legs, and a very natural hour glass shape, she knew what affect she had on men. Knew why her tips were so good when she worked the bar, and definitely knew how to work it all to her advantage.

So no matter how shitty things had gotten for her, she'd always remained positive. When she'd lost her job earlier last summer, she'd been upset, but she'd known things would be okay. Her old roommate, Katya Tocci, would help her out, and of course her parents wouldn't let her go without. Plus, she was resourceful, she'd work at a fast food restaurant if she had to.

Then things had somewhat turned around when she'd gotten her job at The Garden, a night club on the top level and a sex club on the bottom level. She'd worked in bars before, but it was different there. She wasn't serving liquor, she was serving expensive mineral water and kinky sex toys. She doled out advice and courage to newcomers, and she kept a sharp eye on any guests who got a little too “comfortable”.

She was very good at her job, and it turned out she had a head for running the place. The club's owner, Liam Edenhoff, was a good business owner, but during that summer and fall he'd been distracted a lot. Tori had picked up the slack, and it hadn't gone unnoticed. She was quickly promoted, and by December, found herself in the position of assistant manager, which came with a hefty pay increase.

Of course, somewhere along the line, she'd also developed an all consuming crush on her boss. Normally a man eater, she hadn't had eyes for anyone but Liam since she'd developed her little crush. It was part of what drove her to do such good work, it was one of the only ways he seemed to really notice her. He had a tendency to treat her like a little sister, which was the worst.

Yet still, she kept her positive attitude. She kept on trucking and smiling. Provided a shoulder to cry on for Katya when her romantic life was blowing up, and another shoulder when her family life almost dissolved. She even allowed Katya's boyfriend – the real estate mogul Wulfric Stone – to talk her into letting his uptight sister live with her, and beyond that, Tori made friends with the girl. Talked with her, got her to loosen up.

So no matter what was going on, she kept her rose colored glasses on. She kept telling herself since things were pretty okay for her now, that meant they had to become pretty amazing soon. Katya had found her happily ever after with Wulf, and they were best friends, so Tori's turn had to be coming. She'd seen enough romcoms to know how this shit worked.

Her turn didn't come, though. Her turn went to a quiet, snobby woman with zero percent body fat. Wulf's assistant, Ayumi Nakada, flew in so far under the radar, nobody even noticed her until she'd swept Liam Edenhoff off his feet. Had him taking her to fancy rentals in Malibu and tearing his hair out over her. Falling head over heels in love with her.

Even after all that, Tori was pretty sure she could've kept going. A little tired, a little beat down, but one step at a time, and she'd be back to pretty okay.

Then she'd had to go and fuck Landon Edenhoff. Liam's twin brother, they were almost carbon copies of each other. A person had to know them pretty well to tell them apart. Landon was the brains to Liam's heart – he was an actual doctor, a certified cardiologist or some shit. Unfortunately, he was also a chain smoking, vodka chugging, coke addict. He kept his shit together in the light of day, but Tori had seen him in the dark of night, and it wasn't pretty.

And I slept with him.

It didn't matter that the sex had been phenomenal. She didn't care that it had been the best orgasm she'd ever had. He was awful, and he treated everyone awful, and he didn't care about her at all. Quite possibly didn't even like her. And because she'd been kinda drunk and sorta depressed, she'd just spread her legs for him.

No. No, Tori was not feeling “pretty okay” anymore. She was a long way from okay. She was slowly spiraling down towards “fucking miserable” and she wasn't quite sure how she'd handle it when she finally hit rock bottom.

*

“ARE YOU SURE?”

Tori wasn't paying attention to her stylist. She was staring down at her phone. Liam was calling her. She hadn't spoken to him since she'd tried to quit a couple days ago. Since he'd promised to wait for her.

Since he hadn't waited at all and she'd fucked his brother.

She declined the call, then tucked the cell phone under the cape covering her body.

“I'm sorry, what?” she asked, looking in the mirror in front of her. A woman with a punky hair cut stood behind her, staring down at her hair.

“You really want to do this,” her stylist, Joon, checked again, running her fingers through Tori's long, dark locks.

“I really want to do this.”

“Rough Christmas?”

“Why do you ask?”

“Do you know the reason why most women make a drastic change to their hair?” Joon asked, then she didn't bother waiting for an answer. “A break up or they lost their job or something else huge. They chop it all off, or they dye it red, or whatever. So when someone like you, who's never dyed their hair before ever, comes in and asks for a bleach job, I assume the worst.”

Tori cringed.

Great. I can't even be upset without being tragically cliché and painfully stereotypical.

“Yeah, it was a rough fucking Christmas. I'm feeling like kind of a shitty person, so I'm hoping changing my outsides will inspire me to change my insides. I've always wanted to be a blonde, so why not try it. We can always dye it back if it looks like shit,” she said.

“Okay, you're the boss. But I refuse to completely bleach you out and turn you platinum. Trust me and I'll make it look cute, okay?”

“Fine, whatever.”

It took forever. Lighteners and bleach, round after round. Then dye, then highlights, which meant foil wraps, and sitting and cooking forever. Her scalp was burning and itching by the end, which Tori actually thought was fitting. It was how her soul was feeling, after all.

Joon refused to let her see herself, which just added to her nerves. While her back was to the mirror, her hair was neatly trimmed, then blown out. She could catch glimpses of dark honey locks falling around her face, but couldn't get a sense of the overall picture. While she tried to imagine her new look, another half an hour was spent coaxing her hair into gentle waves.

Finally, after a grand total of three hours, Joon stood in front of her.

“I think ...” she said slowly, her eyes wandering over Tori's head.

“You think ... what? I made a horrible mistake? It's going to fall off at the root? What?”

“I think you made a really good choice. You look amazing as a blonde.”

The stylist stepped forward and abruptly spun Tori around. She gripped the arm rests as she twirled, then gasped when she saw her reflection.

Tori had been a chocolate brunette her whole life. She'd never changed it because she'd thought it had always gone well with her natural tan and dark brown eyes. Very harmonizing.

If anything, the dark, dirty blonde harmonized even better. She felt like she looked like a true California girl, for the first time ever. The roots had been left dark and the dye was blended out perfectly to give it all a very natural look. It was a dark enough shade to really match her skin tone, but light enough to clearly, undeniably, be blonde.

“I love it, Joon. Thank you.”

“Don't thank me yet,” the stylist laughed as she pulled the cape away from Tori's body. “I've got a whole list of instructions for you. Blonde looks fun in theory, not so much in practice. Your whole shower routine just changed, babe.”

“Oh great, now you tell me.”

She was a little surprised when she was actually given a care sheet, which explained how to take care of her newly bleached hair. Then she was given product after product – special shampoos and conditioners. Detangler and frizz control. By the time she got up to the counter and saw her grand total, she almost thought Joon was trying to scam her.

Good thing Liam pays me well.

She was feeling happy when she left the salon. She caught glimpses of herself in store windows, saw a smiling, happy blonde. A girl who was going somewhere, doing something, having a blast.

But then there were no more windows, and she remembered she wasn't going anywhere. She was still the same girl, blonde or brunette. She was the back burner chick. The one dudes either wanted as their best friend, or their fuck buddy. The one nobody really took seriously.

The one who was always alone.

Great. I just paid hundreds of dollars to feel shitty in a different shade of hair color.