‘Maybe cos I’m awesome,’ He waggled his eyebrows at her making her grin, but then he fixed her with a stare. ‘Please tell me you’ve kicked him to the curb.’
Lila shrugged and Riley sighed. ‘Lila…don’t you know that he’s lucky to have you? That any guy would kill for a woman like you?’ He looked down at his hands briefly. ‘I would.’
Lila got up and went to him, hugging him tightly. ‘Thank you, Riley…’
He got up from his chair and wrapped his arms around her. ‘Anytime, beautiful, anytime.’
They stayed like that for a beat too long then Lila pulled away – but looked up at him. For a heartbeat, they stared at each other then Riley dipped his head and kissed her. It was a sweet but firm kiss and Lila responded, her lips against his, her hands flat on his chest. When his fingers slid under her t-shirt, for a second, she thought about stopping him.
But she didn’t…he was here and Richard wasn’t…and she needed to be held and loved by someone good and pure, who would never hurt her…
It seemed only a beat before Riley was pulling her t-shirt from her, his eyes fixed on her full breasts, her stomach. ‘Wow. Oh wow,’ he said softly, ‘you don’t know how long…’
‘Ssh,’ she smiled up at him, ‘No words.’
Riley smiled and then they were pulling at their clothes and tumbling to the floor naked, and Riley was hitching her legs around his hips and thrusting into her.
‘Oh god, Lila…Lila…’
The way he said her name made her feel so special, like Richard had in the beginning, so full of love, and wonder. Riley was a skilled lover, all his attention riveted on her and her pleasure and he made her come, a long, drawn out sigh of an orgasm shuddering through her body. Afterward, they held each other and talked and laughed – easy, casual, and friendly.
Lila tucked her t-shirt into her jeans and then grabbed his hand. ‘Hey, Riley…listen, I had a really good time tonight and I…’
Riley stopped her with a kiss. ‘Just between you and me,’ he said, ‘this night belongs to us even if there are no more nights like it.’
Lila smiled at him fondly and touched his face. ‘You are such a good friend, Riley.’
There was something in his eyes that made her chest hurt, a sadness, a disappointment but he smiled at her. ‘Always, Lila. Always.’
And there hadn’t been another night like that. To Lila’s great relief, Riley’s manner towards her hadn’t changed – he was still the warm, goofy friend to her, still flirted outrageously as if they had never been intimate. When Charlie was there, the three of them acted as they always had, Lila and Riley teasing Charlie about his grumpy manner.
It had been a week before Lila and Richard’s wedding when it happened. Lila was celebrating her last night at the bar and all of her friends were there. Champagne was flowing easily but Lila had notice Riley sticking to soda water all night. Eventually she got him on his own.
‘Why aren’t you drinking, Smiley Riley?’ Lila had been drinking and was a little light-headed. She swayed and he steadied her, smiling.
‘Because I’m a lousy drunk,’ he said softly, ‘and tonight of all nights, I didn’t want to be that guy. The guy that tells you he’s crazy about you and has been for years. The drunk guy you look at sadly and shake your head at and wonder why you invited him. The one who gets drunk and begs you not to marry the rich guy because he, the drunk guy, is in love with you. And look, I went and said all that stuff anyways.’
Lila stared at him and Riley looked away from her gaze, giving a little laugh.
‘Oh, Riley…’ Lila felt awful, putting her hands on his face. ‘I’m so sorry.’
He shook his head. ‘Don’t be, it’s not anything you have to be sorry for. I misjudged my ability to stay…distant.’
Lila stood on her tiptoes and kissed him. ‘You know I love you too, right? Just I’m not…’
‘In love with me. That’s okay, shorty, as long as we’re still friends.’
‘Always,’ she said fiercely, ‘always.’
He’d held her for a long minute then gently pushed her away. ‘Go. Go be happy ever after, Lila, go enjoy the rest of your life.’
Four days later, a man with a knife – possibly Riley - tried to end her life and very nearly succeeded.
San Juan Island, Washington State
Noah frowned as he opened the front door to the cottage. Normally, Lila would be waiting on the front porch for him, would throw herself into his arms. Today, nothing.
‘Anyone home?’ He called, his heartbeat quickening before he heard her voice.
‘In here, baby.’
The living room. He dumped his bag and coat and went in – and stopped. Charlie Sherman stood and held out his hand. ‘Hey, doc.’
Noah blinked. ‘Hey yourself.’ He shook Charlie’s hand and bent to kiss Lila’s cheek. She smiled at him, and he saw strain in her expression.
‘Has something happened?’
He sat down next to her and put his arm around her. Charlie watched them and when Lila just nodded, Charlie picked up the story for her. Noah whistled.
‘So this Riley…he’s missing?’
Charlie nodded. ‘Which is why I’m here. I know Lila wanted space and I was happy to leave her be…but things have changed, escalated. And now I know that you two are together, and that there’s a little one on the way…I felt like it was my duty.’
He trailed off but smiled. Noah felt irked. ‘You know, we have got security in place. You may not see it, but it’s very discreet. We have this.’
Lila squeezed his hand. ‘Honey, Charlie came to warn us about Riley, not to tell us what to do about it, right Charlie?’
Charlie held up his hands. ‘Sure, sure, sorry if I caused offense. I’m just used to being Lila’s protector. Forgive me.’
Noah nodded tightly, his eyes narrowing and Lila sighed. ‘Okay then,’ she pulled herself up, ‘if you guys are done pissing around me, then I’ll go make us something to eat.’
Noah got up, his expression apologetic. ‘No, you won’t. We’ll get take out. That okay with you, Charlie?’
‘Of course.’
Later, when they’d eaten and Charlie had gone back into the city to his hotel, Lila and Noah lay in the bathtub together, Lila leaning back against his chest and Noah’s fingers stroking her belly bump. He drew a six on it and she giggled. ‘I know can you believe it? Only three months to go.’
‘Should we discuss names? Have you any ideas?’
Lila smiled around at him. ‘A few…but I’m scared you’ll hate them.’
‘Hmm,’ he considered, ‘well, how’s about you tell me yours and I’ll tell you mine and we’ll see where we’re at.’
‘Okay.’
‘Good. If it’s a boy…William.’
She grinned. ‘I like that. William Noah…or Noah William. Noah Applebaum II.’
‘Oh no,’ he protested, ‘I find dudes who name their kids after them so very, very conceited. What was your boy’s name anyway?’
‘Noah,’ she sulked as he laughed, ‘but I do have some spares. How about Gyjoo – Gee-shooo?’
‘What the hell kind of name is Gee-shooo.’
She grinned wickedly. ‘It’s spelled G. I. J. O. E.’
It took Noah a second then he splashed her. ‘G. I. Joe, very funny.’
‘Sorry but I really only had Noah for my boy choices, but I really do love William.’
Noah cheered. ‘So I get my choice? Victory!’
Lila rubbed her belly smugly. ‘Only if it’s a boy, mister, and as I’m baking this thing, I know for a fact it’s a girl.’
‘Oh you do, huh? Hit me with your choices then.’
‘Okay I’m doing this, top three in reverse order, okay?’
Noah sighed dramatically. ‘Just get on with it, woman.’
Lila chuckled. ‘Okay, in third place…Olivia.’
Noah thought about it. ‘Yep, nice, continue.’
‘Second place… Emeliana.’
‘Hmm, not sure, it’s nice but with Applebaum? That’s a mouthful.’
Lila pouted. ‘Then you’re probably not going to like my first choice.’
‘Go for it.’
‘Matilda.’
‘Hmm. Matilda Applebaum. Matty Applebaum. You have a deal.’
She turned and faced him, the surprise obvious on her face. ‘No way, you agreed that easily?’
‘It’s a gorgeous name for our gorgeous girl, Lila Belle. And by the way, what say we talk about making this all official?’
She stopped and looked at him, her face paling. ‘What?’
Noah grinned. ‘Don’t panic, I’m not proposing…yet. I mean, if we’re having a baby, I’d quite like him or her, Matty or Willy,’ - he grinned at her pained expression – ‘to meet my family so that means I’d like you, my darling one, to meet my family. I warn you – they are crazy.’
‘Good crazy or bad crazy?’
‘It’s a fine line.’
Lila nodded slowly. ‘Okay then, I’m all for crazy. Wow, I get to meet the Applebaum clan.’ She kissed him, her lips curling up in a smile against his mouth. ‘Any family that bred you can’t be all bad.’
Noah chuckled. ‘Thank you, I think. And sorry about earlier with Chuckles. I was oversensitive, the guy just wants you safe same as me.’
Lila sighed happily, resting her head in the crook of his neck. ‘Oh and by the way….there’s no way in hell we’re calling our son ‘Willy’.’
They both laughed and then Noah tickled her until she was screeching with laughter then kissed her until the water got very, very cold.
Seattle
‘I could have come back to the island,’ Charlie said the next morning as they sat in the coffee house, ‘You didn’t need to haul your cookies here, Boo.’
Lila smiled at him. ‘It’s no problem…in fact; I got extra time with Noah coming into the city, so it all worked out. Also, I’m going to stay at his condo here more often now that I’m not ‘in-hiding’ as such.’
Charlie stirred his coffee. ‘Are you sure that’s wise? We still don’t know where Riley is.’
‘I won’t take any unnecessary risks,’ she said, rolling her eyes. ‘No more wedding fitting rooms for me.’
Charlie winced. ‘Don’t joke about that, Lila. Was the worst day of my life.’
‘Mine too,’ she said, half smiling. ‘Charlie, I want to know what you’ve been doing, or rather who? Any chance you and Tinsley could hook up again?’
She looked so hopeful that he grinned. ‘The honest answer is I don’t know. She was dating Harry for a while.’
Lila’s mouth dropped open. ‘Harry…Carnegie?’
‘The very one. Nice guy, actually, better than – ‘
‘Charlie.’ Lila glared at him over her coffee mug.
‘Sorry, old habits,’ but he smiled. ‘Yep, they were hot and heavy for a while but then he went back to Australia.’
‘Tinsley upset?’
‘I honestly couldn’t tell you. She and I were kind of distracted with this Riley thing. I haven’t spoken to her since I got here.’
‘I should call her.’
‘Yes, I know she misses you. Lila?’
She was staring out of the window and when she turned to face him, there were tears in her eyes. ‘Charlie, I want to talk to the Carnegies, I do, but I have no earthly idea of what to say to them, especially now.’
She looked down at her swollen belly, placing her hand protectively over it. ‘I could wait until after the baby is born but I don’t want it hanging over me. Noah says to rip off the Band-Aid.’
‘Noah’s a smart guy. Look, there’s no easy way to tell them what you gotta tell them, Lila. Just do it.’
Lila suddenly chuckled. ‘Jeez, Charlie, tell me how it is, won’t ya?’
‘That’s the way we do it, Tierney.’
The waitress brought their breakfasts and Charlie fell on his pancakes as if half-starved. Lila looked at him fondly. ‘Dude, you need to get back with Tinsley. Be truthful; did you ever really get over her?’
Charlie shrugged. ‘I’m not someone who gets over things, Lila, you know that. I just go with the flow.’
‘Hmm,’ Lila squinted at him. ‘Is it wrong I want you to be as happy as I am now?’
‘No, kiddo, it’s not wrong, it’s not wrong at all. Just sometimes it doesn’t happen for people and I’m okay with it. As long as I got my girl,’ he tapped his fingertip against her cheek and she bit it, giggling.
‘Of course. Hey, listen, Noah’s asked me to go with him and meet his family.’
‘Scared?’
‘More excited. I can’t wait.’
Dr. Applebaum?’
Noah turned to the woman behind him. Joanne Hammond smiled at him and Noah smiled. They had met a few times when he had been dating Lauren Shannon; they were co-workers and Joanne had none of Lauren’s pretensions. Joanne was the trusted second-in-command of Derek Shannon - Lauren’s father – and the life blood of his PR company. He adored Joanne because she ran the place like clockwork – and put up with Lauren. Noah had met her at a company barbecue and was instantly drawn to her wit, sarcasm and cynicism. It had always irritated Lauren that Noah and Joanne were friends – which made it even more enjoyable.
‘Joanne! It’s good to see you…I think. You okay?’ He hugged her.
‘I am – but Mackie’s in for his diabetes again.’ Joanne, a small, athletic woman with dark skin and silver eyes smiled but she looked tired. Her husband, Mackie, was a war veteran who’d gotten depressed after he’d left the military and gained enough weight to trigger type two diabetes later in life. A good man, Mackie had been hospitalized a couple of times and Joanne, almost in her seventies now, was exhausted.
‘Come have a coffee with me while the doctor’s in with Mackie,’ Noah said now, seeing his colleague talking to Mackie, ‘then you can catch me up.’
Even the stoic Charlie was impressed when Lila showed him into Noah’s condo. ‘Okay, should have gone to medical school.’
Lila chuckled. ‘I know, right? To think he trusts us, two street kids, here alone? Shall we case the joint?’
Charlie, laughing, shook his head. ‘You know, we were never really street kids, well, not until we were old enough to be thrown out on our own.’
‘We managed.’
‘We did.’
Lila made them both drinks. ‘Let’s go out on the balcony because we’re fancy.’
‘Always a good reason.’
Noah’s balcony had astonishing views over Elliott Bay and they put their feet up as they settled back into the uber-comfortable deck furniture. The day was bright and cold and the Olympic Mountains soared high on the horizon.
Lila looked over at Charlie. ‘Chuckles, can I ask you something?’
‘Anything.’
‘Do you think I get involved with too many rich men? I never intend it that way.’
Charlie laughed. ‘Lila, have you looked in the mirror? You attract every type of man. And it’s only really been Richard and Noah – two entirely different situations. Everyone else you’ve dated has been pretty low rent.’
‘Don’t say that, they were all great guys – one of them especially,’ she grinned at him. ‘You’ll always be my first love, Chuckles.’
‘Right back at ya, Saddlebags.’
Lila almost snorted her juice out of her nose. ‘That’s so cruel, but hilarious. I’m going to be huge soon at this rate.’
‘You could be the size of Madison Square Garden and still be the most beautiful girl in the world.’
‘Honey tongue!’ She giggled as he doffed a pretend cap. ‘Stop flirting with me, Chuckles, I’m gestating.’
‘Fair point,’ Charlie sighed. ‘Look at that view. God, I miss this city.’
Lila swigged a gulp of orange juice. ‘You could always move back here.’
Charlie looked over to her and smiled. ‘I can’t follow you around my whole life, sweetheart. Besides, if you want me to get with Tinsley again…’
Lila threw her arms in the air. ‘Yes!’
‘There you go.’
‘I want you to get married and have a million kids.’
‘Steady on, girl.’
‘Then come live here in Seattle.’
Charlie sighed. ‘Jeez.’
Lila grinned and then gasped, bending forward and clutching her belly. Immediately Charlie was alert. ‘What? What is it, Lila?’
Lila didn’t answer for a moment then looked up, her eyes shining. ‘She just kicked. That’s the first time I’ve felt it. Oh my god, Charlie, give me your hand.’
She grabbed his arm and placed his hand over her belly. She stared at him, smiling. Charlie started slightly then removed his hand.
‘This isn’t right, it should be Noah…’
‘He’s not here, doofus,’ she grabbed his hand. ‘Noah knows how these things work, you can’t have perfect timing, He’ll just be glad I had someone I love to share the moment.
Noah tried to smile as he balanced the phone between his neck and shoulder and changed out of his white coat. ‘Darling, that’s wonderful. I can’t wait to get home but my dad’s asked me to meet him for dinner after work. Will you be okay for a couple of hours?’
‘Of course, I’ll order takeout, get Charlie to stay with me. I’m so excited though, Noah, I can’t wait for you to feel her.’
Noah chuckled. ‘You’re convinced it’s a girl, aren’t you?’
‘You betcha. Well…say hi to your dad for me, tell him I’m looking forward to meeting him.’
‘Probably better if I tell him about you first…then somehow try to work in ‘Hey, dad, also, you’re going to be a grampy!’.’
Lila laughed. ‘Well, good luck with that, buddy. I love you.’
‘Love you too, beautiful.’
On his way out, he stopped by to see Joanne and Mackie. Mackie was asleep and Joanne was sitting by his bed.
Noah – ever the doctor – checked Mackie’s charts. He tried to keep the grimace off his face but Joanne knew him too well.
‘Yep,’ she said, ‘Mackie’s circling the drain. His words, not mine. But he won’t buck up and take responsibility for his health. He eats, Noah, from the minute he gets up to when he goes to sleep. Maybe not always unhealthy stuff but you know as well as I do, anything in excess…’
Noah nodded, sighing. ‘Sure do. Look, has he tried any psychotherapy to deal with his eating disorder?’
‘A bunch of them. Nothing sticks. He’s resigned to dying, Noah, says he’d rather die happy.’
Noah was irked. ‘And what about you?’
Joanne just looked at him and he nodded. ‘Yeah, I know. Listen, I have to go meet my dad.’
Her eyes lit up. ‘You going to tell him about the baby?’
Noah smiled at her expression. ‘Yeah…wish me luck. Hey, listen, don’t say anything to Lauren, will you?’
Joanne rolled her eyes. ‘As if I would. Good luck with your girl, Noah, you deserve a sweetie.’
‘I’ll come by tomorrow, see how things are.’
As he drove to the restaurant to meet his father, he thought about spending the next fifty years with Lila, as Joanne had done with Mackie. Would they still be as devoted? He had never been more sure of anything. He and Lila were best friends, They were each other’s protector, mind, body and soul.
Noah Applebaum had grown up seeing first-hand what an unhappy marriage could do. His father, Halston, had been a terrible, violent husband to his mother, even when she was dying of cancer. More than once, he, Noah, had stepped between them and taken his father’s blows. When his mother had finally died, she’d kissed Noah and told him that she was happy to go and to get away from his father.
But his mother’s death had changed his father. A full-on breakdown followed and intensive therapy at the most expensive spas in the world and his father was someone else entirely. The first thing he’d done when he returned to Seattle was seek Noah out and apologize. And it wasn’t some sappy apology culled from a program; it was a genuine from the heart plea, not for forgiveness but for a second chance. And his dad hadn’t held back; he began a foundation to combat domestic abuse, gave interviews where he freely and ashamedly admitted to being an abuser, and was a committed public speaker on the subject. Noah, already in his twenties and cynical hadn’t been convinced of the turnaround until he reluctantly attended one of his father’s events. After some speeches, his father asked for a volunteer from the audience, for a woman who had been badly abused. There was hesitation and eventually a small bird-like woman had come to the front.
Hal Applebaum had asked her to stand opposite him, and then he met her gaze. ‘I am your husband, your brother, your demon, your nightmare. I am standing here stripped of every bit of anger. Say what you always wanted to say, scream your rage at me, tell me everything you wanted to say when you were being abused.’
The woman had been nervous at first, her voice barely audible, but as she began to speak, to vocalize her hurt, her pain, the atmosphere in the room was electric. Noah found himself almost unable to breath as the woman started to yell, scream pull at his dad’s shirt, express every ounce of pain her abuser had visited on her and his dad just took it. When the woman’s sobs had quieted, Hal took her hands.
‘I’m not your husband,’ he said softly, ‘and you’re not my wife. He never apologized to you and my wife never heard me apologize. This won’t make up for that but I think it will help both of us. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry that this happened to you, there is no excuse for all the hateful things you heard, for the pain inflicted on you. You are strong and kind and beautiful and any man who treats you less than a goddess is not worthy of you. I’m so, so sorry.’
The look on his dad’s face – Noah knew that not only was he talking to the tormented woman in front of him, he was talking to Noah’s beloved mom.
Afterward, he’d approached his dad. The two men stared at each other, then Noah held out his hand and his dad broke down. Tears rolling down his face, he pulled his son into a hug.
‘I know this doesn’t make anything right,’ he said, his voice breaking, ‘but I’ll spend the rest of my life trying.’
It hadn’t solved their problems overnight but they worked on it. Now Noah enjoyed a warm but separate existence from his father. He had remarried, a lovely woman called Molly, and now his father lived in Portland with her and Molly’s teenage son, Kyle. Kyle and Noah bonded quickly and now Noah considered Kyle a brother. The younger man had graduated summa cum laude and now worked as a journalist in Kuala Lumpur.
Noah walked into the restaurant and saw his father and Molly waiting for him. They hugged him hello and they chatted easily while they were seated.
Halston smiled at his son. ‘I hear great things about your work, son. Saul Harlow says you could be the youngest Chief of Surgery in a generation.’
Noah thanked him. ‘But, actually, Dad, Molly, there’s something else I have to tell you – something pretty big.’
And he told them about Lila and the baby. Both Hal and Molly were surprised, shocked and then delighted. ‘Well, this is extraordinary news,’ Hal clapped his son on the back, ‘Congratulations, Noah, that’s wonderful.’
‘So exciting,’ Molly squeezed Noah’s hand, her soft face lit up. Noah grinned at them.
‘So, I want you to meet Lila – you will love her.’ His smile faded a little. ‘I should tell you…she used to be engaged to Richard Carnegie.’
‘Wait,’ his dad frowned, ‘She’s the young woman who was attacked, right?’
‘She was stabbed, yes,’ Noah’s mind went back to when he’d first met Lila, ‘They still haven’t found the person who did it so we’ve had to up security.’
‘Awful,’ Molly looked upset. Noah smiled at her.
‘Lila’s much better now; I mean, there’s still some way to go with her range of motion but we’re waiting until after the baby is born to complete her rehab.’
‘When is she due?’
Noah cleared his throat. ‘About three months.’
His dad’s eyebrows shot up. ‘And you’re just now telling us?’
‘It’s a long story.’
Seattle
Charlie Sherman left Lila at the condo and went to meet his compatriots at the Seattle police department. The detective he met with, a middle-aged tired looking man named Cabot Marin, greeted him with a resigned sigh. ‘If I earned a dollar for every nut-bag stalking a woman…’
Charlie filled him in on Lila’s case. ‘No, I have to be fair, apart from Riley’s disappearance and what we found at his apartment, we have no other evidence to suggest Riley is the man who stabbed Lila, or that he has ever committed any crime. But he is our only lead and the fact he went missing on the day we linked him to the attack…’
‘Yup. Sometimes we have to go where the investigation points, even if it is somewhere that’s uncomfortable. Well, look, we already know that Dr. Applebaum had employed extra-security – they applied for concealed weapons licenses, which they were granted. Miss Tierney appears to be well-protected, both out on the island and at the doctor’s condominium. Is she the type to follow instructions to keep herself safe?’
Charlie half-smiled. ‘Not in the least, which is what worries me. Lila is street-smart but headstrong – she rubs against any restrictions. She says she won’t take unnecessary risks but if I were Riley, I’d wait for the necessary risks and strike then.’
Cabot Marin nodded. ‘Yup. Well, all we can do right now is be vigilant.’
Charlie shook his hand. ‘I appreciate it.’
He left the police building and walked back to his hotel. He had told Lila he would meet Noah and Lila for breakfast the next day and then fly back to New York. He pulled out his phone and dialed a number, smiling when he heard Tinsley’s Australian accent. ‘Hey, you,’ he said warmly, ‘you got any plans for tomorrow night?’
Seattle
Noah crept quietly into the bedroom, pulling his clothes off and hanging them over the chair, as quiet as he could be. Lila was asleep, lying on her side, one hand under her cheek, the other reaching out towards his side of the bed. Noah slipped in beside her and she stirred, opening her eyes and smiling at him.
‘Hey gorgeous.’
Noah brushed his lips against hers, tasting her minty toothpaste on her breath. ‘Hey yourself, baby.’ He nuzzled her nose with his, then slid his arms around her and pulled her close. She smelt of sleepy warmth and fresh linen, and her skin was so soft, he couldn't help but run his hands over her bare skin.
‘Your hands are cold,’ she grumbled but giggled when he tickled her.
‘I love you when you’re all sleepy like this,’ he ran his fingers through her hair; ‘you’re so funny.’
She grumbled something unintelligible.
‘What was that?’
Lila rubbed her eyes. ‘Sorry, I said, how was your dinner with the parental units?’
Noah smiled. ‘Good…they can’t wait to meet you but they had to go back to Portland tonight, so Dad suggests we go down there for the weekend. What do you think?’
‘I’m in. Hey, the baby’s kicking again.’
Noah slid his hand onto her belly and she guided it to where the baby was kicking her. Noah’s eyes widened. ‘Wow…that feels so weird.’
‘Doesn’t it? God, she’s a little bruiser too, I swear, she’s been kicking up a storm all day. Go to sleep, Matty Apple.’
Noah grinned. ‘Matty Apple?’ Lila smiled and kissed him.
‘I maybe know a way to, um, rock her to sleep.’ She pulled herself up and straddled him, reaching for his cock.
Noah lay back, and relaxed as she stroked him gently between her hands then traced the tip up and down her sex.
‘Do you want me?’ Lila asked softly and he nodded, unable to tear his eyes from her body, lit by the moonlight flooding into the room, her dark hair tumbling down in messy waves.
They made love slowly, each movement sensual and languid, drinking each other in. When they had finished, Noah wrapped her in his big arms and they fell asleep.
The phone woke them both a little before three am. Lila groaned as Noah reached for it. ‘Yup? Okay. Okay. I’ll be right in.’
Lila protested as he slid out of bed. ‘What is it?’
‘A patient took a fall…Mackie; he’s sort of a friend. He wasn’t even supposed to be out of bed…damn it.’
‘Did he hit his head? Is that why they called you in?’
‘Yes…god, I’m sorry, baby.’ He was frantically pulling his clothes on, now.
‘Don’t worry, I hope he’s okay.’
He leaned over to kiss her. ‘Will you be okay?’
‘Of course, go, go.’
‘Lock the door behind me.’
She followed him sleepily to the front door and kissed him again. ‘Go save a life, superman.’
She closed and locked the door behind him and went to bed, not seeing the alarm pad blinking. She curled up beneath the covers and was asleep in minutes.
She didn’t hear the doors to the balcony being slid open and a figure entering her home. The intruder made their way to the bedroom and stood at the side of Lila’s bed, watching her sleep…
Noah went to look for Joanne just after six am. The woman was staring out of the window of the relatives room at the dawn creeping over the horizon. She saw his reflection and turned and by the expression on her face, she was already prepared for his news.
‘I’m so sorry, Joanne.’
She nodded once. ‘I know. I felt him go…not just tonight but years ago. It wasn’t a life, Noah, he’s at peace now.’
‘What about you? Will you be okay?’
She smiled at him and patted the seat beside her. Noah sat down and took her hands in his. She smiled at him. ‘I will be,’ she said, ‘and probably sooner than I ought to be. What was it in the end, the fall?’
Noah nodded. ‘The hell of it is that if he had been healthier, he might have made it but because of the smoking, he was already depriving his brain of oxygen. His cause of death will be hypoxic brain injury due to fall and life style choices.’
‘Well,’ Joanne was stoic, ‘that’s just it. They were his choices.’ She sighed and got up. ‘Guess I’ll just go home then. Will they take care of Mackie until I can get things arranged?’
‘Of course,’ Noah stood and hugged her. ‘I’m so sorry, Joanne, again, if there’s anything I can do.’
‘You’ve done plenty,’ she said, ‘if Mackie’d had any chance after that fall, it would have been you that handed it to him. Some people can’t be saved.’
After she’d gone, Noah slumped down into a chair and buried his head in his hands. Jeez, how quickly lives can change. He thought of Joanne going home to an empty bed for the first time in fifty years. God…
An image of Lila in that fitting room all those months ago…okay, so he hadn’t been there but he’d seen enough stabbing victims – and now he pictured her, curled up in a fetal position, her blood pooling around her, her hand pressed hard against her belly as she tried to stem the blood….stop it. That’s in the past.
He got up and strode to the doctor’s changing room, stripping off his scrubs and dumping them in a laundry bin.
He didn’t know if it was the combination of losing Mackie, the lateness of the hour or the visions of Lila bleeding that haunted him, but he knew that right now, there was only one thing he wanted to do.
Get home. Now.
Barely breathing, she kept her eyes closed but her senses were on the edge as she listened to the intruder walk around the condo. She’d woken – but thankfully not opened her eyes – when she heard the floorboards creak and immediately felt the presence next to the bed. She waited for the knife or the bullet or hands on her body but none came.
She risked opening her eyes a crack. She saw the figure through the doorway in the living area, and mentally ran a scan of anything in the bedroom she could use as a weapon. Her eyes lit upon a small marble lion’s head sculpture on Noah’s nightstand.
She smiled grimly to herself and shifted slowly across the bed to grab it. She sat up and slid out of bed and to the door, peaking around it to see where the intruder was. The kitchen area. Good.
Lila slipped into the living area silently, her bare feet making no noise on the carpet. As she reached the intruder, they turned and Lila raised the sculpture. The intruder batted her arm away but Lila let go and the marble lion’s head smashed down on the intruder’s shoulder. A high-pitched yell – feminine – made Lila lose concentration for a moment then the assailant was on her, hands around her neck, choking, pushing her down to the floor. Lila rammed her fingers into the attacker’s eyes and there was a scream – this time, Lila was sure. It was a woman.
‘Get off me, you fucking bitch,’ she kicked the attacker in the groin and she rolled off of her. Every single emotion that Lila used to feel defending herself on the streets came back to her, and she darted around the prone attacker, yanked open a drawer and pulled out the biggest knife she could find and held it in front of her.
‘Come at me, bro,’ she growled, fury raging through her, daring the attacker to try again.
Instead, the attacker gave a sob and crumpled to the floor. Lila stared at the figure in black in disbelief, then reached over, flipped on the lights and yanked the mask from the attacker’s very blonde head. The young woman didn’t look at her.
‘I’m sorry, okay-y-y-y,’ her voice wobbled as she sobbed, ‘I just wanted to see you.’
Lila dropped her arm but not the knife. ‘Who are you?’
The woman looked up finally, and Lila saw she was young, about Lila’s age, and very pretty – when she wasn’t covered in snot and tears.
‘Are you Lauren?’
Noah had told her about his ex-girlfriend months ago, when Lila was still going through rehab. The girl nodded.
‘I’m sorry,’ she said again and scrambled to her feet. Lila took a step back and raised the blade in front of her. Lauren held up her hands.
‘I promise, I never intended to hurt you…I’m sorry about before but you did just hit me in the shoulder.’
‘You broke into my home.’
Lauren nodded, looking at her curiously. ‘Who are you?’
Lila took a deep breath in. ‘Lila Tierney. I’m…with Noah now.’ Almost unconsciously, her hand moved to her belly, protectively and Lauren’s eyes followed.
‘Oh.’
‘Yes.’
Lauren’s eyes filled with tears again. ‘Noah’s?’
Lila nodded. ‘Look, Lauren, could you just…go? Or tell me what you want? If you leave now, I won’t tell Noah – or the police – this happened.’
Lauren nodded but dipped her head shyly. ‘Just a couple of questions before I go and I won’t bother you anymore.’
Lila sighed. ‘What do you want to know?’
Lauren studied her. ‘Where did you meet Noah?’
Lila hesitated. ‘At work. His work.’
‘You’re a doctor?’
‘No.’
‘A patient?’
Lila hesitated. ‘Not any more. Look, Lauren, I’m sorry but you really have to go now.’
‘I will, I will, just…do you love him?’
Lila’s expression softened. ‘Very much.’
‘And he loves you?’
‘That’s what he tells me.’
Lauren smiled sadly. ‘He never once told he loved me.’
‘I’m sorry,’ Lila said evenly. Lauren nodded and walked to the front door.
‘I am, too. Sorry if I hurt you, I didn’t see you were pregnant. Good luck with it all.’
‘Goodbye Lauren.’
Lila closed the door after the woman and leaned back against it, shaking her head. ‘The world is full of fruit loops, little Matty,’ she said to her bump. She was getting used to that name – if it was a boy, he might have to be called Matthew, she pondered now as she locked the door and this time remembered to set the alarm. She locked the balcony windows – how the hell did Lauren climb up this high? Crazy.
She padded back to bed but couldn’t sleep, instead staring at the ceiling. All the adrenaline had left her body now, and the shock of the assault began to sink in.
‘Jesus,’ she whispered to herself. Will I ever be safe again? Every time she felt settled, something happened to rock her equilibrium. Eventually she fell into an uneasy sleep, full of nightmares and dreams of being stalked by an unknown menace.
Lila flipped the pancakes onto a plate, covering a yawn as she listened to Noah and Charlie talk. Noah had come home a couple of hours after Lauren had left and one look at his face told her that Mackie didn’t make it. She held out her arms and he had gone into them, holding her tightly. They held each other until they both fell back to sleep and when Charlie had rung their door bell, they both groaned.
Charlie grinned at them both, their hurriedly tugged on clothes and bed-head hair. ‘Should I give you an hour? I can come back.’
Noah and Lila waved away his suggestion. ‘You’re family,’ Noah said and Lila shot him a grateful smile. Her two favorite men in the world were getting along and that made her unbelievably happy.
But now, of course, they had to go and spoil it by talking about Riley. She wondered if she should tell them that she’d slept with Riley that night so long ago. God, am I a slut? She shook her head. Both of the men in this room, Riley, Richard, a couple of guys when she was younger. By modern standards she was practically a novice.
‘So, best thing to do is take normal precautions, lock doors, set alarms, don’t go walking alone at night.’
Lila turned and stared at Charlie and he grinned. ‘Thought that would get your attention.’
Lila waved the pancake slice at them both. ‘You two know I’m in the room, yes?’
Noah snorted with laughter. ‘Lila Belle, it’s your safety we’re concerned about, is all.’
Lila turned back to the stove, hiding a guilty expression. She’d promised Lauren she wouldn’t say anything….ah, screw it, the woman had broken into their home.
‘Well, in that case, you might want to tell your ex-girlfriend not to break in in the middle of the night.’ She dumped a plate of pancakes on the breakfast bar a little too hard. Noah blinked.
‘Excuse me?’
Lila sat down and looked at both men. ‘Lauren. She shimmied up the side of our building last night, came in through the balcony. I had to throw down with her.’
Noah bugged at her. ‘What the actual fuck? Why didn’t you say anything? I’ll fucking kill her…’ He stood up but Lila grabbed his hand.
‘Sit. Down. Now. No biggie,’ she stared him down. Noah sat.
‘Whipped,’ muttered Charlie but Lila glared at him. Noah looked between the two of them then rubbed his face trying to wake up enough to think clearly.
‘Let me get this straight. Lauren broke into this house last night?’
‘Yup.’
‘And you, what, wrestled?’
‘She was snooping around, I ambushed her, she choked me, and I kicked her in the lady nuts.’
Charlie spat his coffee out, choking on laughter.
‘This isn’t funny,’ Noah snapped at the laughing man. ‘Jesus Christ, Lila.’
Her face softened. ‘It’s fine, babe. We calmed down, talked stuff through. She’s a weird one but no harm done. Mostly. I may have fractured her shoulder with your lion’s head thing.’
‘This just gets better.’ Charlie looked at Noah’s set face and shut up again.
‘You have to tell me stuff like this. Where the hell was security?’
‘To be fair, they weren’t expecting Spider Woman.’
Noah sighed. ‘We’re moving. If someone can get in that easily...’
‘No way, I love this place.’
Noah shook his head. ‘We’ll talk about this later.’
Charlie cleared his throat. ‘That’s my cue.’ He stood and Lila hugged him, pouting.
‘You really have to go?’
‘’Fraid so, munchkin.’ He hugged her back tightly. ‘I’ll see you both soon.’
‘Sure we can’t take you to the airport?’ Noah shook Charlie’s hand.
‘Thanks but no, cab’s easier.’
‘He hates goodbyes,’ Lila rolled her eyes, ‘He cries. You should see it, it’s like Love Actually.’
‘Yeah, yeah, yeah,’ Charlie waved her teasing away. ‘Take care of each other.’
When Charlie had gone, Lila knew Noah would want to return to the subject of Lauren so she pre-empted him. ‘So, you should have maybe told Lauren about the bambino.’
Noah sighed. ‘I don’t see that it’s any of her concern; we were over months ago.’
‘Still, your really quite recent ex has a baby on the way. That’s gotta sting.’
‘Do you care?’
Lila considered. ‘I suppose not. I felt sorry for her.’
‘Don’t. She’s a viper, don’t trust the innocent little girl act.’
‘Oh, I don’t. Look, can we not talk about her anymore?’
Noah smiled and wrapped his arms around her. ‘Good idea. Thank god it’s the weekend. What shall we do?’
She laughed at his suggestive grin. ‘Well, apart from that, we could see if your dad and step-mom want to come out to the cottage with us?’
Her voice shook at the end, nervous, but Noah grinned widely. ‘Really? You ready?’
Lila kissed him and nodded, her eyes excited. ‘I’m ready.’
Manhattan
Tinsley Chang cheered as Charlie made his way into the bar that night. ‘At damn last,’ she said, going to hug him, ‘Man, I want all the gossip.’
Charlie chuckled, but lowering his tone, he glanced around the busy bar. ‘Any sign of Riley?’
She shook her head, her smile fading. ‘No, dude, I’m sorry.’ She looked over at Mikey who was behind the bar. ‘Dude, I’m taking off, you all set?’
Mikey waved her away. ‘Go on and leave me, you thankless wench.’
Tinsley laughed then dragged Charlie out onto the street. ‘We’re going to my place. I bought some micro beers and we can order pizza and we are going to talk, Sherman.’
‘Pregnant.’
‘Yes.’
‘Lila is pregnant.’
‘Like I said.’
‘Six months pregnant.’
Charlie sighed. They’d been over this again and again but Tinsley was still looking at him as if he’d gone mad. ‘I don’t know what else to tell you, Tins.’
‘With the hot doctor’s baby?’
‘You think he’s hot?’
‘Is the sky blue?’
Charlie was a little irked and didn’t hide it well. Tinsley prodded him. ‘You’re still my favorite, Chuckles. So, she’s happy?’
‘Getting there, I think. She’s freaking out about what to tell the Carnegies. Talking of whom…how’s your man, Harry?’
‘Half a world away,’ Tinsley said matter-of-factly. ‘We’ve talked a few times. Mostly about how great Melbourne is.’ She smiled to herself. ‘Makes me kinda homesick.’
‘For Australia or Carnegie?’
Tinsley considered. ‘Harry and I had a great time but I think we weren’t meant to be long term. I don’t do long term.’
Charlie huffed out a laugh. ‘I know that.’
She sighed and pulled her legs up under her. ‘You were my longest…thing.’
Charlie grinned. ‘Why, thank you.’
‘Don’t be gross.’ But she giggled. ‘But seriously, I’m just doing my own thing lately. This Riley thing is really getting to me though. Woods came to see me.’
Charlie looked up sharply. ‘He did?’ Woods was Riley’s brother; the two had an antagonistic relationship and Charlie had never warmed to the guy. Pretentious, arrogant – the opposite of easy going, affable Riley.
‘Wanted to know if I’d seen Riley. I thought you’d talked to the family?’
‘Not yet, not until we known for sure that Riley’s a suspect. God,’ Charlie ran a hand through his hair. ‘It’s driving me crazy, not knowing and – ‘
He stopped as his cell phone buzzed. ‘Gimme a sec. Yeah?’
Tinsley watched his face as he listened. It changed from annoyance to concern.
‘Yeah, yeah of course, I’ll be straight there.’
He shut off his phone and turned to her. ‘It’s Cora Carnegie. She got caught in the middle of a drugs bust.’
‘Oh, no, poor kid.’
Charlie sighed and stood. ‘I’m sorry, Tins, I have to go.’
‘Of course.’ She walked him to the door but as he stepped out, she stopped him. ‘Listen, if Cora…doesn’t want to go home tonight, bring her here. It’ll give her some space, to think, to rest without…you know.’
Charlie smiled down at her. ‘You’re a peach.’ He hesitated then kissed her, full on the mouth, brief, quick, then jogged down the hallway to the stairs.
Tinsley closed her door slowly, her emotions in turmoil. She didn’t want to get involved with anyone so soon after Harry and especially if it would risk the friendship she and Charlie had built but…that kiss. Damn…
Tinsley shook her head. She was still reeling from the news about Lila and the baby. Tinsley grinned to herself and wished there was some way she could get in contact with Lila, talk to her. Charlie had said Lila wanted to get in touch but she needed to talk to the Carnegies first, explain. Tinsley didn’t envy her friend that conversation.
She didn’t envy that conversation at all.
Seattle
Lauren gave a squeak of shocked surprise as Noah gripped her upper arm and steered her into the nearest coffeehouse.
‘Sit down and shut up,’ he snapped at her as he summoned the waitress and ordered black coffee.
‘I don’t drink coffee,’ Lauren tried to hide her nervousness. Noah looked about as angry as she’d ever seen him and it didn’t take a genius to figure out why. Unconsciously, she touched her shoulder, still badly bruised from where Lila had struck her a few nights ago.
‘It’s not for you,’ Noah retorted then relented and ordered a chamomile tea for her.
Lauren tried a winsome smile. ‘You remembered.’
Noah’s expression was thunderous. ‘You’re lucky you’re not sitting in a police cell. What the fuck did you think you were doing breaking into our home in the middle of the night?’
Lauren dropped the pretense. ‘Fucking bitch, I knew she would rat me out.’
‘You don’t say a word about Lila, do you understand?’ Noah’s tone was low, dangerous and Lauren looked away from the fury in his eyes.
‘I just…wanted to see who replaced me. And, goddammit, Noah, you should have told me she was pregnant.’ Tears welled in her eyes and she made a show of brushing them away.
The waitress came with their drinks, her eyes flicking between the two of them, obviously curiously about the tension. Noah gave her a wintry smile and thanked her, and the waitress, disappointed moved away.
‘I don’t owe you a damn thing, Lauren. You and I were over months ago, before I even met Lila.’
‘Exactly,’ she hissed. ‘And yet she’s already pregnant? You bastard, you know how much I wanted a baby.’
Noah sighed. ‘But I didn’t want children with you, Lauren. Hell, I didn’t want them with anybody until I met Lila. I’m sorry if that sounds cruel but you and I were not destined to have a happy ever after. We want different things.’
Lauren was quiet for a long moment and when she met his gaze, her expression had turned to one full of spite. ‘I could always tell her you were still banging me after you met her.’
Noah wasn’t troubled. ‘She would know that wasn’t true.’
‘Psychic, is she?’
Noah gave her a humorless smile. ‘And when would you say this so-called ‘banging’ occurred?’
Lauren smiled. ‘In between you first banging her and when she got pregnant.’
Noah grinned then. ‘Here in Seattle, was it? Did I swing by your apartment after seeing her?’
Lauren’s bluster faltered. ‘Noah…’
‘Thing is, Lauren,’ Noah was enjoying himself now, ‘unless you invented time-travel in a very fast jet plane, that would be physically impossible. Not only was I in New York, but there was no time between the first time Lila and I were first intimate and the time she got pregnant.’
Lauren’s eyes grew wide and her smile turned nasty. ‘Wow, that’s fast work. I’ve got to give it to her, that’s fast gold-digging work.’
Noah’s eyes were dark. ‘Lila has no need to desire for my money; don’t judge her by your standards, Lauren.’
Lauren flushed red but lifted her chin. ‘I don’t need to; getting knocked up on the first date speaks for itself.’
‘I was already in love with her,’ Noah said softly, quietly and with such feeling that Lauren couldn’t help the gasp of distress.
Noah sighed, reached into his pocket for some bills to pay for the coffee. ‘I’ve said what I came to say, Lauren. Stay away from Lila, stay away from me.’
Lauren narrowed her eyes. ‘And what if I don’t?’
Noah smiled coldly. ‘Then Daddy Dearest will find out what a psycho his darling daughter is and bang goes your trust fund. Believe me; it wouldn’t take much to convince him.’
‘You wouldn’t,’ she hissed at him, eyes blazing.
‘If you ever come near me and Lila again, I have his number on speed dial. Remember that.’
And he was gone. Lauren was suddenly aware that other people in the coffeehouse were staring at her. She lifted her chin, stood, threw some money for her tea on the table– she was damned if she would let Noah pay for her – and stalked out.
Fucking, fucking, fucking bitch. She should have known Lila Tierney would tell Noah about the break-in. Well, she would pay for that little indiscretion…because Lauren knew who Lila Tierney was and soon, so would the rest of the world.
Manhattan
Charlie came by the nest morning. ‘How is she?’
Tinsley beckoned him into the kitchen. ‘Still asleep,’ she said, ‘and I don’t think she’s at all happy about being here.’
Charlie looked confused. ‘But she said she didn’t want to go home.’
Tinsley rolled her eyes and smiled at him. ‘You are clueless, Charles.’ She stuck her head around the door to check Cora wasn’t around then turned back to him. ‘She wanted to go home with you, Charlie.’
Realization dawned and he groaned. ‘Oh, god.’
‘Exactly. Being shacked up with your ex-girlfriend is not what she planned. Still, she went straight to bed, not very chatty either. Will she be charged?’
Charlie shook his head. ‘She was just at the wrong place at the wrong time, she hadn’t even been using, thank god.’
Tinsley felt a pang of jealousy at the fondness in Charlie’s voice but turned away to hide it.
‘I can’t tell you how grateful I am you offered to let her stay here,’ Charlie said softly, and he touched her back, stroking down it. ‘Her coming home with me would not have been a good idea.’
Tinsley looked up at him and he smiled. ‘Cora’s not the one I’m interested in,’ he whispered and bent his head to kiss her. Tinsley closed her eyes and sank into the kiss, winding her arms around his neck. God, she had missed this man, his machismo, his strength. Harry had been a wonderful diversion and one she would never forget but…Charlie Sherman….damn…
She regretfully broke away from him. ‘We can’t do this now, Charlie, not with – ‘ She jerked her head towards the bedroom door where Cora slept just as they both heard the front door slam.
‘Shit.’
Tinsley went to the bedroom and it was empty. ‘She saw us.’
Charlie sighed. ‘Looks like it. God dammit.’ He went to the window. ‘Getting in a cab.’
‘She really isn’t your responsibility, Charlie. And we don’t need to be ashamed of wanting to be together.’
Charlie looked at her, his mind obviously on overdrive. Tinsley sighed.
‘Look…go to work, check she got home safely. That’s all we can do right now.’
‘will you be at work later?’
‘Only until eight.’
‘I’ll come pick you up and we’ll grab some dinner. Cool?’
She smiled and went to him. ‘Very cool.’ They kissed again, briefly and then Charlie was gone.
Charlie called her about five pm. ‘Hey, Tins, look I’m sorry, I have a lead on Riley in Queens – I have to follow it. Can you get home safe?’
Disappointed, Tinsley told him she could and when her shift at the bar was over, she grabbed her bag and went out into the night. She walked briskly, the cool night air refreshing after the sweaty atmosphere of the bar. At her apartment, she took the stairs one at a time then skittered to a stop. Woods Kinsayle was standing outside her apartment. Tinsley considered turning around but then Woods saw her. He looked exhausted and stressed out.
‘Hey, Woods,’ she plastered a smile on her face. She’d never liked the man, thought he treated Riley appallingly.
‘Tinsley, hey, look, sorry about this. I was passing and it was a whim to stop and come see if you’d heard anything.’
Tinsley felt sorry for him. ‘Look, Woods, come in, we’ll have a drink and talk. Sound good?’
She saw his shoulders slump with relief. ‘Sounds great.’
Once they were settled, with cold beers, on her couch, Tinsley looked at him. ‘Woods, I really don’t know what else I can tell you except maybe that Riley’s absence doesn’t look too good for him.’
Woods shook his head. ‘I know. But, Tinsley, really – can you imagine Riley hurting anyone, let alone Lila, who he adored?’
Tinsley had thought of little else. ‘No, I can’t but that doesn’t mean that, in a moment of madness, he didn’t.’
Woods sighed, frustrated. ‘But look, the manner of the attack, the brutality. If Riley had a moment of madness, why wouldn’t he have used his gun? Why did he run? Wouldn’t a murder/suicide situation have been easier to believe? Riley shoots Lila, realizes what he’s done, then kills himself?’
‘I’m not a psychologist,’ she said gently and Woods nodded.
‘I know, I know, I just running through all these scenarios in my head. What does Charlie say?’
Tinsley shifted uncomfortably. ‘I think he doesn’t want to believe it’s Riley; at the same time he’s desperate to protect Lila.’
‘Which I know is totally fair…god, but he doesn’t have to tell our parents that not only is Riley missing but a suspected would-be-killer.’
She put her hand on his shoulder. ‘I know. I’m sorry, Woods, really.’
He only stayed a little while longer, then left. Tinsley sighed. God, what a mess this all is.
She toyed with the idea of take-out but then fell asleep on the couch watching TV. before she could decide what to get.
She awoke with a start and almost screamed. It was dark, the TV. had been shut off and at the side of the couch where she was lying stood a figure in black. She saw the glint of light from the knife he was holding. She reacted immediately, kicking out at the intruder, catching them on the knee, hearing an annoyed grunt. Male.
Riley. And he was here to kill her…
No, no, no. As he lurched forward to grab her, she ducked under his arm and threw herself at the door, twisting the handle before she felt the knife slice into her back.
Not deep. She screamed and lashed out behind her as he came for her again. She opened the door and banged him with it, using every inch of her strength to twist and turn out of his reach, still screaming for help. None came. The knife sank into her side and she jerked away from him and almost fell down the stairs leading out onto the street.
She was half crying with fear, half screaming, cursing the cowards who would not help a woman in distress. The attacker grabbed her arm, wrestling her to the ground. Tinsley fought with every piece of strength she had left, twisting her body as he jabbed at her with the knife.
Suddenly there was a group of young men, yelling and the knife-man disappeared. Tinsley couldn’t believe it. She lay bleeding on the sidewalk as a couple of the guys knelt down to take care of her. They helped her to her feet when she said she was okay.
‘Looks like he got you a couple times,’ a kid, no more than twenty, peeled off his over-shirt and pressed it against the worst of her wounds.
In minutes, paramedics and police were there and in a daze, Tinsley was whisked off to the emergency room. Different voices talked at her for a while but seeing she was in shock, soon left her alone. Her wounds weren’t serious but she was sore and covered in blood.
What the hell happened? Her brain was a fog, not helped by the morphine the doctors had given her for the pain.
It was only when she heard Charlie’s deep voice, raised and angry and scared, that it hit her.
Someone had tried to kill her.
Breathing became hard and as Charlie came into view, Tinsley finally broke down. Charlie took her into his arms as she sobbed, telling her over and over that it was okay, and she was safe now.
Seattle
Noah watched fondly as Lila demolished a stack of pancakes and a side of bacon. As she chewed she grinned at him and he laughed. ‘How are you not the size of a house?’
Lila swallowed her food. ‘Believe it or not, it’s just the last couple of days I’ve felt this hungry.’
He took her hand as they sat in the diner. ‘You excited to find out the sex of our bambino?’
It was their final scan and last night, Lila had told him she was sick of waiting to find out whether their little Matty was a girl or a boy. Noah hadn’t needed much persuasion to agree.
‘I’d like us to start looking at family homes for us,’ he said and she nodded.
‘That would be good…I’d like to keep the cottage on the island; it such a good little weekend place.’
‘I agree but I think we need something more suitable than the condo here.’
‘With a garden and a white picket fence?’ Lila chuckled and he grinned.
‘Hell, yes a white picket fence.’
Lila stirred her hot milk. ‘Noah, would you mind very much if it wasn’t in one of those gated communities? I know between us we could probably buy an entire community to ourselves, but I want our kids to be best friends with the kids on a normal suburban street, ride their bikes, play pea-knuckle.’
Noah burst out laughing. ‘Do you even know what pea-knuckle is?’
Lila grinned. ‘No idea but you get the picture.’
Noah nodded mock-seriously. ‘Yep, you want our kids to grow up in the 1950’s.’
She flicked some milk at him. ‘I was thinking more 1980’s, E.T. in the basket at the front, Grandpa.’
Noah shook his head smiling. ‘I adore you, Miss Tierney. Come on, it’s time.’
Hand-in-hand, they waited for the OBGYN to start the scan. Lila winced; once as the doctor took a look at her still vivid scars, even more prominent now her belly was swollen, then as the doctor squeezed the cold gel onto her skin.
Lila suddenly felt nervous…she so wanted a girl that she was scared that if it was a boy, she wouldn’t love it as much. She looked up at Noah, who smiled down at her, and she felt better. A little boy – a little Noah. Of course she would love him, god, she would love him…
‘Okay, let’s go…’ the doctor, gazing at the screen and pressing the sensor into Lila’s stomach. She moved it around for a while but didn’t say anything. Lila glanced at her face.
‘Can you see what sex it is?’
She felt Noah squeeze her hand and when she looked at him, there was something in his eyes that made her feel cold. She looked back at the doctor and suddenly her throat felt full of cotton wool.
‘Dr. Stevens?’ Noah’s voice was flat. ‘What is it?’
The doctor put down the sensor and turned to them. She seemed to have trouble getting the words out.
‘Noah, Lila, there’s no easy way to say this…’
Lila moaned when she realized what the woman was about to say. ‘No…no…please, no…’
‘I’m so sorry, but I can’t find a heartbeat, or any signs of life.’
Noah made a noise, a groan, a heart-wrenching sound as Lila shook her head furiously.
‘No, that’s not possible, I felt her, I felt her kicking…’
‘When did you last feel that?’
Lila’s tears were falling unchecked. ‘Yesterday, yesterday my baby was kicking me…oh god, oh god…’
Noah wrapped his arms around her, his face creased with pain and sorrow. ‘Lila…’
‘Check again,’ Lila almost screamed, ‘check again. Maybe she’s asleep.’
‘Lila, darling, there’s no heartbeat,’ Noah said in a broken voice and Lila crumbled.
‘I’ll give you two a moment,’ the doctor – a friend and colleague of Noah’s – looked as upset as they did, and she left the room, closing the door behind her.
‘How? How can this be?’ Lila asked desperately, clutching at Noah, who shook his head.
‘I don’t know, sweetheart, sometimes it…just…happens.’
They clung to each other then, Lila sobbing, Noah’s own face wet with tears. Finally, calming down, Lila closed her eyes. ‘I wanted her so much, you know? I was so excited to have your baby, Noah; I know we can have more but…’
‘It’s okay,’ he said wearily, heartbroken, ‘it’s okay, sweetheart, to mourn our child.’
There was a knock at the door and the doctor came back in. ‘I’m so sorry, to both of you, It’s rare but late term miscarriages can happen. Have you had any trauma lately?’
Lila gave a hollow laugh. ‘Where do I start?’
Noah cursed under his breath, and then apologized to them both. ‘Lauren. Jesus H. Christ.’
The other doctor looked confused. Lila, head in hands, told her about Lauren’s break-in and their subsequent fight. Dr. Steven’s eyes were big and she shook her head.
‘You should call the police, report this. Obviously we won’t have the full cause of death until the autopsy,’ she took Lila’s hand, sympathy in her warm brown eyes. ‘Lila…I’m sorry to add to your pain but we need to make a decision now. Because of how late it is, we’ll need to either give you medicine that will induce birth straight away or wait for your body to naturally go into labor. That takes about two weeks but, Lila, it is risky to leave it and risk infection.’
‘I have to give birth.’ Lila’s voice was flat.
‘I’m afraid so. Caesarian is too risky, especially in your case. I’m so sorry. I’ll give you and Noah some time to discuss what you want to do.’
In the end, they all agreed to get it done, get through the worst part. Lila gave birth to their stillborn daughter at four am. the next morning and afterward, they were left alone with her to say goodbye. Lila couldn’t take her eyes from the small perfect features; Matilda Tierney Applebaum was a beautiful baby – with her tiny eyes closed, she looked as if she was asleep.
‘I keep looking at her and everything in me is hoping that she’ll just take one breath, live here with us, even if it’s only for a moment. Just hear our voices one time.’ Lila’s voice broke, her body wracked with exhausted, heartbroken sobs. Noah’s tears joined hers, dripping onto their daughter’s tiny forehead.
‘We love you, Bean,’ Noah kissed his child’s cold skin then kissed Lila’s temple. They stayed there for hours, the three of them, their family until the doctors came to take Matty away.
Manhattan
Tinsley woke in Charlie’s bed. At the hospital, after being stitched up and refusing to stay overnight, Charlie had overridden her objections and taken her back to his place. There he quizzed her on every detail of the attack until she was dropping from exhaustion. He apologized and put her to bed in his freshly changed bed. She had grabbed his hand as he turned to give her some privacy and just said, ‘Stay.’
Now she woke, cradled in the strong cage of arms, breathing his woody scent in, listening to his breathing. Safe.
Her wounds were sore now, her muscles aching but god, she was happy, amazed that she was still alive. Now all that was left was confusion; who the hell would want to kill her?
She realized the magnitude of confusion that Lila must have felt – and with the pain Tinsley had felt, she couldn’t comprehend the pain of being stabbed repeatedly, deep in the belly, that Lila had experienced. She felt weirdly closer to her absent friend and, now she felt desperate to see Lila, to talk with her, for that female warmth and understanding.
Tinsley looked at Charlie’s face as he slept, deep lines of worry etched on his forehead even at rest. ‘Charlie,’ she whispered, then pressed her lips against his. Charlie opened his eyes and smiled at her. She wanted to tell him then that she wanted to go to see Lila but as he smiled down at her and kissed her again, nothing else in the world mattered, nothing existed except for them, here, now.
Tinsley pulled him on top of her and wrapped her long legs around his waist. For a second, he looked amazed, then wary. ‘Are you sure?’
She nodded. ‘I need you, Charlie…’ and with a groan he buried his face in her neck and they began to make love, slowly, gently at first. As they lost themselves in each other, Charlie hitched her legs around his waist and drove his cock deep into her. Tinsley gasped, a mix of sweet pleasure and pain, then as she moved with him, their gazes locked and she gave herself over to the feral animal in her and they fucked long and hard, the intensity never letting up until they were both groaning and breathless, shattering climaxes ripping through them. Charlie moaned as his cock pumped thick, creamy cum deep inside her velvety cunt and Tinsley reveled in the feeling of his weight on top of her.
He made her come again with his mouth, again and again until she was exhausted and crying, then he gathered her into his arms and held her so tenderly as she let out all the tension that had built up inside her over the last twenty-four hours.
Tinsley was startled. ‘Really?’ They were sitting in his kitchen and she had just told him of her wish to see Lila. Charlie had shrugged and nodded. ‘Okay.’
He grinned at her now. ‘Of course, I’ve been thinking the same thing and I know she misses you. Also I want you far away from your apartment, the bar and anywhere else Riley might look for you so I do have selfish reasons too.’
Tinsley sipped her coffee. ‘I need to talk to Mikey first.’
Charlie cleared his throat and grinned, his face reddening slightly. ‘Kind of already did. Sorry if that was overstepping.’
Tinsley sighed. ‘On this occasion, you’re forgiven. How long did you get me?’
Charlie leaned over to brush a lock of blonde hair from her cheek. ‘As long as you need. That’s Mikey talking as well.’
Tinsley was relieved. ‘And Lila? Will she be okay with it?’
Charlie nodded slowly. ‘I haven’t called her yet, but I think so. Especially now,’ he added with a knowing grin and Tinsley chuckled. ‘Look,’ he said, checking his watch, ‘how about this. You go grab a shower and I’ll call her then we’ll go together to your place to pack, grab a flight this afternoon?’
Tinsley frowned. ‘What about your work?’
‘Don’t worry about that, I got some time owed.’
After she’d showered, checking her wounds in the mirror – a long slice down from her shoulder blade down her back, about three or four inches long; small cuts in a pattern over her left breast; a deeper wound in the soft flesh of her hip. God, I’m so lucky. As she dressed, she threw back a couple of aspirin with the rather stale glass of water by the bed.
When she was done, she went back into the kitchen – and stopped. Charlie was staring into the middle distance, an unidentifiable look on his face, his phone on the table in front of him.
For a second, every horrific scenario ran through her head. Had Riley finally got to Lila?
‘What is it?’
Charlie shook his head. ‘It’s Lila. She’s lost the baby.’
San Juan Island
Noah stroked Lila’s soft hair as they lay on the bed together, facing each other, talking softly. She had wanted to come back to the island rather than the condo, the place where they knew now the baby had died. The pathologist had been quick, patient and kind. The placenta had partially detached during the fight with Lauren and the baby stopped getting the nutrients it needed to survive.
Lila reacted with just a tight nod but Noah had walked out for a few seconds, trying to keep his temper in the face of Lila’s absolute grief.
They had a small burial service; Lila had wanted a Jewish funeral for Matty and so Noah performed a small service in the non-denominational chapel. It had been a day of unbelievable pain for both of them.
Now, they lay together, trying to assuage some of that pain by just being together. Charlie had spoken to Noah and Noah had gratefully told him and Tinsley to come. Lila too, had said she didn’t want to be one of those women who moon about and waste time wishing that things could be different.
‘Talking of different,’ Noah said now, ‘I’m thinking of giving up my practice at the hospital. I’ve done everything I can achieve in my field…I’d like to go into research, maybe teaching. And that’s something we could do anywhere, Lila. What do you want to do?’
Lila sighed. ‘I want to go back to school, finish out my Masters, and see where we go from there.’
Noah half-smiled. ‘Still want the picket fence?’
A look of pain crossed her face briefly but she nodded. ‘I do. With you. Nothing else matters, Noah, not to me, except you now. But I won’t be defeatist, or,’ – and she smiled for the first time in days – ‘be a kept woman. I’ve decided I don’t want to keep Richard’s money. I never wanted it in the first place. If the Carnegie’s won’t take it back then I’ll tell them I’m giving it to charity – one of Richard’s that he supported or a few of them, I don’t know. I’m rambling, I know.’
Noah kissed her gently. ‘Ramble away. And I agree with you…why hold onto something that never felt right? It’s not as if we can’t afford it.’
‘I need to pay my own way,’ Lila said firmly then her shoulders slumped. ‘But I realize I can never compete.’
‘It’s not a competition and it’s just money. I would give away every cent as long as I have you.’
‘Romantic but totally impractical, that’s why I love you.’ She cupped her cheek in her palm.
‘When we’re married, it’ll be legally yours anyway,’ he said but didn’t say anymore.
‘I’m glad Charlie and Tinsley are coming today.’
‘Me too, baby.’
When their guests arrived, it gave them both a release. Tinsley and Lila held each other for the longest time, Lila horrified to hear what had happened to her friend. Tinsley and Charlie, Lila noted, were closer than ever. At least one good thing had happened and Lila was glad. ‘I’ve put you in the front bedroom, I hope that’s okay,’ she said so nonchalantly that the other three looked at her askance and she broke into giggles. God it felt good to laugh.
‘Subtle as a sledgehammer as always,’ Charlie grumbled as Tinsley laughed. Noah checked Lila’s cheek.
‘Momma Bear,’ then realizing what he’d said, he froze. Lila, despite the jolt of pain, smiled at him.
‘Always Momma Bear,’ she said softly. ‘Now, come, people, let’s eat.’
After lunch, Noah’s phone buzzed and he grimaced. ‘Looks like I have to go to the city for a work thing. Will you be okay?’ He left the question hanging, looking at Lila.
She nodded. ‘Of course, honey.’
He kissed the top of her head. ‘I’ll see you later. Charlie, can I grab you a sec?’
Charlie followed him out to his car. Noah took a deep breath and fixed him with a steady look.
‘You locked and loaded?’
Charlie smiled grimly. ‘You bet I am. Don’t worry…nothing’s going to touch our girls.’
Noah shook his hand. ‘There is back-up should you need it – Lila knows where the panic buttons and alarms are.’
‘Don’t worry, dude, I got this.’
‘I know, I trust you.’
Seattle
In the city, instead of driving to the hospital, Noah headed downtown to the business district, pulling into the underground parking garage of one of the high-rise office buildings. Joanne was waiting for him. ‘I can get you through security easier,’ she said when he asked her what she was doing.
Noah stopped. ‘You’ll be fired.’
She laughed. ‘Hell no I won’t, not when he hears what you have to say.’ She put a hand on his arm. ‘I’m so sorry, Noah, about the baby. I don’t have the words.’
‘Neither do I, Joanne, but thanks. Is she here?’ Joanne was showing her credentials to the security guards.
‘And utterly clueless as ever. I’m looking forward to this.’ Security waved them through and they stepped into the foyer of the Shannon Media building.
Noah smiled grimly as they got onto the elevator. ‘Believe me, so am I.’
Derek Shannon had built his company over forty years of hard, hard work, to the detriment of two marriages and, he believed, of his fathering skills. Lauren had the talent but none of the application, or hunger that he had, or required in his staff. But he was too kind-hearted to do anything about it, relying more and more on Joanne, who ran the company with such efficiency that Lauren was merely a figurehead. Strangely it had worked out well; Lauren glad-handed the clients, Joanne happy to stay out of the limelight. But lately, Lauren had grown morose, sulky and become that thing Derek had always feared – spoilt.
Derek Shannon could trace the very day it had happened; it was the day Noah Applebaum had decided he’d had his fill of Lauren’s princess act and cut her loose. Not that Derek blamed Noah; he had liked the intelligent young man very much and had hoped he would have some influence over Lauren. But once Lauren had discovered that Noah was from old money – forget it. Lauren wanted to be a trophy wife and never have to work. Derek actually admired Noah for saying no to Lauren and ending things but that was also the problem – Lauren was never dumped; she always did the dumping. And it rankled.
Right now, as he spoke to his board members, he kept glancing over at his daughter, who was staring out of the window, clearly bored. Derek sighed inwardly then looked up as Joanne entered the room with Noah Applebaum. Derek’s face lit up.
‘Noah! How wonderful to see you,’ he strode forward and took his hand, pumping it vigorously. Lauren was halfway out of her seat, looking shocked and alarmed but Joanne, very deliberately stood with her back against the only door to the room, and stared her down. Her gaze, full of disgust, said Try it, bitch, and I will take you down. Lauren quelled under the gaze of the much older woman.
Noah too glared at Lauren then turned back to Derek, who was looking mystified. ‘Derek, I’m sorry to intrude on your meeting but the reason I came was this. You need to know about what kind of person your daughter is.’
‘Noah, please,’ Lauren began but Noah raised a hand and she shut up. ‘Derek, a few days ago, your daughter broke into my home in the early hours of the morning and assaulted my girlfriend. My six-months pregnant girlfriend. Lila was defending herself and Lauren attacked her.’
‘Lauren, what the – ‘
‘Two days ago, Lila lost the child due to the attack. Our daughter died in utero. Lila had to give birth to a stillborn baby and yesterday, we buried her.’
Lauren’s face drained of all its color and there were gasps around the table. Joanne looked sick and Derek, seeming to shrink into himself, stumbled and had to grasp the table. He looked at his daughter.
‘Dad – ‘
‘Lauren, is this true? Did you break into Noah’s home and attack his girlfriend?’
‘She hit me first!’
Noah rounded on her. ‘You had broken into our home in the middle of the night! I should tell you, Derek, that my girlfriend is Lila Tierney.’
‘That name is familiar,’ Derek said weakly and Noah nodded, his face hard.
‘She was stabbed last year, brutally and she nearly died. At the time, she was engaged to Richard Carnegie.’
‘Oh my god…’
Lauren, seeing the look in her father’s eyes, started to plead. ‘I just wanted to see her, who she was, why Noah was moving on so fast. She attacked me; she hit me with something, look!’ She tugged her blouse down to show them the large bruise on her shoulder.
‘You broke into the home of a survivor of attempted murder in the middle of the night just to see her?’ Derek’s voice was flat now, angry. ‘And you wonder why she hit you first? And when you saw she was pregnant?’
‘No, no, no, I swear, after I saw she was pregnant I didn’t do a thing.’
Noah closed his eyes. He would never, ever strike a woman but Lauren was making it hard for him to remain calm and focused.
‘But you tried to choke her before,’ Noah said, his rage a roiling thing inside him. Everyone else seated around the table, Joanne at the door, was riveted on the three people at the center of the drama. Lauren took a deep breath.
‘Daddy,’ she stepped towards her father but he moved back, staring at her aghast.
‘Who have I raised?’ His voice was a whisper. ‘What kind of person are you, Lauren? You were given everything. Everything. Including more chances than most people would ever dream of. And finally your recklessness has cost a life.’
Lauren started to cry but it was Derek that Noah felt bad for, but then he thought of Lila and Matty and his resolve hardened. Derek put a hand on his arm.
‘What do you want me to do, Noah? I will try to make this right, I swear to you.’
Noah sucked in a lungful of air. ‘No-one can do that, Derek, not when our child is lying in a grave and not in her mother’s arms. But there has to be consequences.’
Derek nodded. ‘I understand. Do you want me to go to the police, or handle this in-house?’
‘I’ll leave that up to you, Derek, I’ve said what I came to say.’ He stepped closer to the man and leaned in to murmur ‘Leave Joanne out of this, she was doing the right thing.’
Derek nodded tightly, glancing at his deputy. ‘You can trust me on that one, Noah.’
Noah nodded at him, then the others, ignoring Lauren and walked to the door.
‘I’ll make this right, Noah.’
Noah nodded again and left the room followed by Joanne. In the hallway they hugged, not needing words, then Noah rode the elevator down to the foyer. Before he went to get his car from the parking lot, he walked out into the fresh air, down the side alley of the building and threw up and up until he was dry-heaving.
San Juan Island
‘It is gorgeous here,’ Tinsley said, her arm linked with Lila’s as they walked around the state park. Lila was pointing out all the places she used to come walk when she got here, mostly to watch the orca from the shoreline. They found a bench and sat down. Lila looked at her friend.
‘How are you? I mean, after the attack. You seem surprisingly well.’
Tinsley sighed. ‘I’m angry more than anything. Who the fuck could do that? Break into my apartment like that? And my fucking neighbors…’ She gritted her teeth and shook her head and Lila took her hand.
‘Tins, you can stay with us as long as you need.’
Tinsley grinned then. ‘Lila Tierney, if this is more of your plotting to bring all of your friends to Washington…then I’ll admit it’s tempting when it’s as beautiful as this.’
‘All of my friend except one. I just can’t believe that Riley is the suspect. Riley…he looks like a giant teddy-bear; he is a giant teddy-bear. I can’t get my around it but Charlie is convinced.’
Tinsley's smile faded. ‘I know. Part of me wants to scream at Charlie, don’t be so fucking ridiculous! But until we find Riley…’
Lila looked away from her friend and Tinsley could see tears glistening in her eyes. ‘Lila…’
‘In my head,’ Lila interrupted her, ‘we find Riley, he’s a bit banged up but okay and he tells us he found who it was but they tried to silence him. Then he and Charlie go catch the bastard and…’
‘We all live happily ever after. I’m sorry, kiddo, you know better than most. It ain’t gonna happen.’
Later, at home, Lila and Noah were alone. Tinsley and Charlie had gone to collect some takeout from town – were giving the couple some space, Lila knew.
‘How’s my girl?’ Noah brushed his lips against hers. She leaned into his embrace.
‘I wish I could say okay, Noah, but I think it’s a ways off yet.’
‘Yeah.’ His lips on her temple now. God, she wanted him to take her to bed, to forget everything but the doctor had warned them off penetrative sex for a few weeks. She looked into Noah’s eyes and knew he was thinking the same.
‘How about a soak in the tub?’ she murmured against his lips. Noah led her by the hand to the bathroom and they stripped each other slowly as the bathtub filled, kissing every piece of exposed flesh before climbing into the tub. Lila straddled him, coiling her arms around his neck and studying his face as if she’d never seen it before.
‘I love you, Noah Applebaum.’
He smiled, his large hands stroking slowly up her back and around to cup her heavy breasts. He dipped his head to take each of her nipples into his mouth in turn, his tongue flicking around the nub. He slipped his hand gently between her legs. ‘Does it hurt when I do this?’
He stroked her clit gently and she shook her head.
‘No, that feels so good.’ She reached down to stroke his cock, engorged and throbbing as she ran her hands along it, her finger gently teasing the tip, feeling it jerk, hearing Noah’s moan. They kissed slowly, tasting each other, their tongues massaging, their breath mingling.
It was a slow, tender, beautiful release of tension, bringing each other to orgasm, Lila’s back arching, her head dropping back as she came, Noah groaning her name as her hands stroked and caressed until he shot hot, white semen onto her belly.
Afterward, she lay back against his chest, and he splayed his large hands over her stomach, still swollen but noticeably slimmer. Lila sighed.
‘One day, I hope that my belly will be swollen with your babies again. Lots of them. Boys and girls and the boys are as handsome as their daddy, and the girls are all as brilliant as you too.’
Noah kissed her temple. ‘So the boys don’t have to be brilliant?’
‘No, they’re boys; they just have to be pretty.’ They both laughed, glad that they could still be silly together in the face of recent horrors.
‘I meant to tell you,’ Lila said, ‘I got a lovely bouquet from a friend of yours…Joanne is it?’
Noah was surprised. ‘That was nice of her.’
‘I would like to meet her…and speaking of meeting people, I think it’s time I met your parents.’
‘Dad and step-mom, but yes.’
‘Don’t you like Molly?’
‘I adore Molly and I guarantee so will you but she’s always been very careful to say she’s not replacing my mom, even though she loves me like I was her son.’
Lila felt a pang. ‘That’s really sweet. I wish I had known my mom but no, not a thing.’
Noah’s arms tightened around her. ‘Molly will mother you, I promise. And, look, I’ll try and arrange something soon. Should we include Charlie and Tinsley?’
‘It might keep the conversation lighter,’ Lila said, trying to hide a grin.
‘You just want Tinsley there as a shield.’
‘Damn right. You know who I’ve been thinking about? Cora and Delphine.’
Noah sighed. ‘I know. We really do need to go see them, clue them in.’
‘Yes, I think we’ve been lucky none of this has gotten out and I haven’t called to explain. I couldn’t bear that.’
But, of course, it finally did get out – and in the worst way. Lila and Tinsley were shopping at the local farmer’s market when Lila suddenly noticed people stopping to stare at her. She frowned at them but didn’t say anything until they got into her car. She asked Tinsley if she had noticed.
‘Yes, actually, all morning, even when we were having coffee,’ Tinsley admitted. Lila shook her head.
‘I don’t get it – do I have a booger on my face or something?’
Tinsley laughed. ‘Girl, don’t you know me better than that? I would have told you.’
They laughed about that on the drive home but it wasn’t until they were preparing lunch and Lila flicked the TV. on in the kitchen that they discovered the horrible truth.
Lila, her stabbing, Richard Carnegie, his murder and her subsequent pregnancy by her own doctor. All over the news. And the angle? Lila was a gold-digger who drove an ex-lover to stab her just as she was about to ensnare billionaire Carnegie. Her subsequent disappearance and pregnancy by her doctor – another rich man, of course and the loss of that baby – what would Lila do now that her meal ticket was slipping out of her grasp?
Tinsley was enraged – but Lila felt sick. This was everything she hoped would not become public knowledge.
When Noah came home, furious, a couple of hours later, she merely looked at him calmly and said one word.
‘The Carnegies.’
Upper East Side, Manhattan
Delphine looked at her coolly. ‘You look…well.’
Lila knew she didn’t – in fact she looked like crap, flying on the red-eye from Seattle, having begged Delphine to see her. Her hair was a messy bun at the nape of her neck, her clothes hurriedly pulled on sweats.
‘Delphine…I’m so sorry you had to find out like this. I was going to come see you but events over took me.’
‘You had six months.’
Lila winced but nodded. ‘I did. But I was a coward. I didn’t know how to tell the mother of my murdered ex-fiancé that I was already pregnant with another man’s baby. Would you have been able to do that?’
Delphine looked away. Lila took a deep breath in.
‘Delphine…Richard and I…we should never even have been engaged, or even been a couple for a long time before I was attacked. We both knew it. We loved each other but as friends. We just didn’t know how to get off the rollercoaster.’
Delphine studied her. ‘When you went to see him that last time – ‘
‘We broke things off. We parted on good terms, I want you to know that.’
‘Did you sleep with the good doctor before or after that conversation, Lila?’ Delphine’s voice was ice and Lila knew she already knew the answer.
‘Before. And I am sorry; Delphine, but I don’t regret anything. I fell in love with Noah long before I slept with him. He is everything to me and our child, although she didn’t survive, she is still real to me. I still feel like a mother.’
Delphine’s face softened. ‘I’m sorry about the child, Lila, truly. But I thought we were close, that you trusted me enough that you would have known to come to me. When we lost Richard, it was agony but when you left too…a part of me died.’
Her words broke the dam that Lila had been building around her emotions and she gave a sob. ‘I don’t want to do this,’ she said, ‘I don’t want to cry and have you think I’m crying so you’ll be nice to me. What I did…I cannot take back, I don’t want to take it back. But if I could save some of the hurt you felt…I know it’s too late. I love you, Delphine, I loved Richard, I love Cora and Harry and Richard Sr. But I cannot be part of your family anymore.’
Delphine mouth quivered and she quickly covered it with her hand, looking away from Lila, breathing deeply to steady her nerves.
‘Don’t say that,’ she whispered eventually. ‘Please don’t exile us from your life. Not permanently. If you need more time, fine but please, when you’re stronger, come back to us. If not as our daughter, as our friend.’
Lila, trying to contain herself, closed her eyes. Please let me go. But a part of her didn’t want that either. They had been her family. Lila just felt she didn’t deserve to have both the Carnegies and her new life – it was too much.
‘Hello.’ A small voice behind her. Lila turned. Cora, red-haired, thin as a bird, stood behind her. Her eyes were dull, her features pinched but she gazed at Lila not with hatred but with sorrow. Lila could not help but hold out her arms to her and Cora went into them, hugging her tightly.
Delphine watched them for a moment then got up. For a long moment, she placed her hand on Lila’s shoulder, looking down at her, then nodded and left the room.
Manhattan
Noah sat with Charlie in the precinct, watching the rest of the office as they went about their jobs. Charlie was on the phone but he ended the call.
‘Sorry, man, another bad tip. Didn’t think we’d get nothing on Riley, and I mean, nothing.’
‘You talked to that brother you don’t see eye to eye with?’
Charlie rolled his eyes. ‘Multiple times. Look, is Lila freaking out about that news story? Because I guarantee no-one will remember it by next week.’
‘Only that the Carnegies will be hurt but she’s with them now.’
‘Any idea who sold that story?’
Noah gave a humorless snort. ‘Oh yes…Lauren Shannon. She’s still sore at me; I really should have seen it coming.’
‘Well, at least we know something then. I’m getting a little tired of being in the dark about these attacks.’
‘Me too. I feel antsy about being here even, about Lila being in the city. You must feel that way about Tinsley.’
Charlie nodded. ‘Man, the things men do to women.’
‘The things we do.’
Cora finally let Lila go. She sat back and wiped her eyes. ‘Lila, I’m so sorry about everything. When I saw that story, I knew why you had left, and I didn’t blame you. I heard what you said to Mom and you’re right. You and Richard weren’t destined to be happy ever after.’
Lila was a little thrown. ‘Cora…I thought you’d be the angriest of all of them at me. You’d just buried your brother and now you find out, I was already pregnant with another man’s baby at the funeral. I can’t forgive myself for that part, even though I don’t regret being pregnant.’
Cora stared at her with large blue eyes, struggling to find the words then said. ‘We’ve all done bad things, Lila, all of us. I…oh god…’
She crumpled into tears again and Lila, really worried now about the young woman, hugged her tightly.
‘Cora, what is it? What are you trying to tell me?’
Cora, through her tears, said something unintelligible. Lila stroked her hair back from her face. ‘Cora, breathe. That’s it, another one. Now, tell me slowly.’
Cora was trembling violently. ‘It was him, you see. I fell in love with him and I thought….that night…I thought he wanted me but then he took me to her place and then I saw him kiss her.’
Lila shook her head. ‘Cora, you’re not making any sense.’
Cora was shaking her head back and forth. ‘I paid someone. A guy I know, not a good guy. I paid him to scare her off….I paid him to get rid of her but I didn’t know he would actually go through with it…I was so scared…’
Lila’s blood went cold. ‘Cora…are you telling me…’
‘I was the one who sent that man to hurt Tinsley. Oh god, Lila, I was so in love with Charlie and it wasn’t fair and I was crazy jealous and…’
Lila’s head was in her hands, not wanting to hear anymore. ‘No…no…’
‘I sent him to hurt Tinsley, Lila…I tried to kill Tinsley…’
Hold Onto Me Part Four
Manhattan
Noah looked down at Lila, tucked into the crook of his arm as they watched TV. back at their hotel. She had been quiet ever since she’d been at the Carnegie’s – although she said it had gone well – and now Noah was worried. He picked up the remote control and flicked off the TV. Lila barely reacted.
‘Okay,’ he said, ‘there’s something on your mind. Spill it.’
Lila hesitated then sighed. ‘I was thinking of all the ways that love – or at least what we might think is love – is corrupted. Tainted.’
Noah smiled. ‘That’s deep for this late in the evening. What’s really bothering you?’
Lila rubbed her eyes. ‘Just between us?’
‘Of course.’
She gazed at him for a long moment then… ‘Cora hired a guy to kill Tinsley.’
Noah felt the blood drain from his face and he groaned. ‘Oh, fuck.’
‘Yeah.’ Lila wrapped her arm around his waist for comfort. ‘The upside is she’s distraught about it. She’s glad the guy didn’t succeed.’
‘Because of Charlie?’
Lila nodded. ‘See what I mean? People do crazy things for love. Or lust.’ She swallowed hard and looked at him. ‘Noah, I have something I want to tell you and, god, it’s not easy. I have never told anyone this, not even Charlie.’
He frowned. ‘What is it, love?’
‘I slept with Riley. About fifteen months ago. Richard and I were going through a bad patch, he’d been cheating and I had tried to be blind to it but one night, Riley and I were at the bar late, after closing and I’d just had enough. It was only that one time but…’
‘But what?’ Noah kept his voice level. He didn’t judge Lila – or Riley – for what they had done but he was still strangely jealous.
‘He told me that he was in love with me, that if he were someone else, he would beg me not to marry Richard. He wasn’t…I mean to say, he didn’t come across as obsessive just a sad guy with a crush. I ached for him, felt guilty. ‘
Noah tightened his arms around her. ‘We all make mistakes with other people’s hearts, all of us. Doesn’t make us bad people.’
Lila pulled away from him so she could face him. ‘Exactly. Which is why I have a hard time thinking that Riley is behind all of this. It just doesn’t make any sense.’
Noah was quiet for a moment, letting her think. ‘The photos on the wall of his apartment, though.’
‘Someone could have put them there…no, I know, it’s ridiculous. Maybe it was his way of dealing with his crush.’
Noah was skeptical. ‘Sweetheart, if you have a little crush, you maybe have one photo. Not thousands.’
‘Where the hell did he get them from, that’s what I want to know. Actually, scratch that. We weren’t talking about Riley and me; this is about….do I tell Charlie and Tinsley what Cora did?’
Noah let a long breath hiss out from between his teeth. ‘That’s a hard one…’
‘Isn’t it just. What would you do?’
Noah considered. ‘Maybe get Cora to talk to Tinsley in private. Tinsley deserves to know the truth – Charlie…well, that’s up to Tinsley.’
Lila nodded slowly. ‘That’s a good idea, yeah, that is a good idea. I’ll call Cora in the morning.’ Noah saw her shoulders relax and a small smile play around her lips. ‘Thank you, baby, you always know what to do for the best.’
She crawled back into his arms and pressed her lips against his. ‘Why do I feel, despite everything, that things are going to be okay? I think it’s you, Noah Applebaum. When I’m with you, I feel safe, loved.’
‘You are both those things, Lila Belle.’ He grinned then. ‘I never did ask, is your middle name really Belle?’
Lila chuckled. ‘No, it’s just what Delphine used to call me. Cora is Cora Belle and somehow that translated to me as well. I liked it.’
‘What is your middle name?’
‘I don’t have one. I don’t even know what my real name is, or even if my birth mother gave me a name. Apparently, and I know this is weird, until I was three and put into the children’s home, they called me Lily. It was Charlie who named me Lila, and gave me his mother’s maiden name.’ She smiled now, remembering and Noah stroked her face.
‘Maybe, one day soon, I can give your my name – if you want it,’ he smiled but his eyes were wary. Lila kissed him.
‘Nothing would make me happier.’ She pressed her lips against his neck. Noah buried his face in her hair.
‘Then, when you’re fully healed, we’ll go away together. Somewhere only we know and I’ll ask you properly.’
She looked up at him with shining eyes. ‘I can’t wait, my love. I can’t wait.’
The next morning, Lila drove out to Westchester in the hire car Noah had arranged for her. She had pooh-poohed his suggestion being driven by a bodyguard. ‘Who’s going to get me travelling at speed on the Interstate?’
He had no argument and she kissed him gratefully. ‘I’ll call you when I get there, I promise.’
It was Richard Sr. who greeted her at the door. Never an effusive man, Lila was shocked when he pulled her into a bear-hug. ‘We missed you around here, Lila Belle.’
His warm voice brought tears to her eyes and all she could think of then was how much she’d hurt all of them by disappearing.
Richard told her that Cora was waiting for her in her room and with a smile; he went back to his study.
Cora was sitting on her bed, her big eyes wide with nervousness and Lila couldn’t help but feel for the young woman. Cora was fragile, vulnerable…but, Lila reminded herself sternly, that was no excuse for what Cora had done. And it was hardly a little thing either…
‘Cora, darling, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about what you told me.’
Cora frowned. ‘What did I tell you?’
A small pang of dread hit Lila’s stomach and she sighed. ‘Cora, I think you know.’
‘No idea what you’re talking about.’
So this was how it was going to go, was it? Lila shook her head. ‘Yes, you do, Cora and pretending otherwise is not going to help it go away.’
Cora stuck her nose in the air. ‘You’re really going to have to enlighten me.’
Lila had heard enough. ‘Cora, what you did was despicable.’ Enough with treading softly, Lila thought, and she saw Cora’s face redden.
‘Lila…’
‘No, Cora, no. We are not doing this. You put me in the middle by telling me, and now you have to step up and face the consequences. I think you should talk to Tinsley, tell her what happened, why you did what you did.’
Cora laughed, a false high sound. ‘I hardly know the woman, why should I talk to her?’
Lily’s mood darkened. ‘Trying to have someone killed, Cora, just because they’re involved with a man you like – you don’t think that’s good reason?’
Cora looked away from Lila’s gaze. ‘I don’t understand why you’re saying this to me. It must be the hormones in your system; I know you must still be feeling strange after the baby and everything.’
Low blow. ‘Cora, do you really want me to tell Tinsley? Charlie? Your parents?’
Cora looked at them, her blue gaze icy. Her mouth hitched up in a cruel smile. ‘And who do you think they’ll believe, Lila?’
Lila’s temper flared and she clenched her fists, digging her nails into her palm. ‘Fine. Let’s see, shall we?’
She stalked out of the room and down the stairs. She slammed the front door on her way out and it was only when she was halfway up the drive that she let out a howl of frustration. Why couldn’t this be simple? She’d had visions of taking Cora to Tinsley, a tearful admission, an instant pardon from Tinsley. And everyone lives happily ever after, she shook her head. You bloody fool, Tierney.
She drove back into the city and to her hotel, greeting Noah’s security team. In the suite, she dumped her bag and slumped onto the couch. Jesus. What should she do? Who was her loyalty to?
She grabbed a pillow and stuck her face in it, screaming a loud ‘Fuck!’ deep into its softness.
No. If Cora was going to be a bitch about this, then there was only one thing to do. Tell Tinsley what she knew. Then it was up to Tinsley what action she took and Lila could take herself out of the equation.
She called Tinsley at the bar and asked her to meet her later then she went to shower, hoping the cool water would cool her hot temper. So much violence, she thought as she scrubbed at her body with the soap, so much damn violence. She looked down at the sill livid scars on her belly. Her body had quickly gone back to its pre-pregnancy shape, and now she could feel her ribs against the taut skin. Too skinny. She had hardly eaten since Matty had been stillborn, and she knew Noah was torn between insisting she eat and look after herself and not wanting to pressure her. God. She cranked the faucet off and leaned her forehead against the cool tile. She wanted to get away with him soon, go somewhere where it was the just the two of them, start rebuilding a life.