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Chapter 1

Nixon

Halloween Night

A slight chill took over the night air as my driver pulled up in front of the club I’d directed him to. This was where I’d always come to find a bit of relief. The darker side of me often came out around the most sinful of holidays. The Dom in me wanted a sub to play with for one night. That’s all I dared to allow myself.

I’d trekked up to Portland, Oregon, to get away from my life in Los Angeles, California, for a speck of time. I didn’t dabble in the BDSM realm at home. I saved that for when I came to the club I’d joined when it first opened a few years back. The Dungeon of Decorum was a place I hadn’t often visited, only coming up once, or sometimes twice, a year.

I only liked to play at being a Dominant; I wasn’t the full-time kind. I had never leased a sub or even paid for more than a night’s pleasure. It was just a way for me to blow off steam once in a while, nothing serious.

When I’d received the invitation to the club’s first annual Halloween Ball, I got the itch to have some BDSM fun and made plans to attend what the invitation assured would be a great time.

A red carpet led me from the car I’d hired to the front door of what looked like a shack. On the outside, that’s all anyone saw. On the inside, the stairs took you underground, to where a massive structure housed a large main room, several smaller more intimate rooms, a host of private rooms, and even private suites for long-term stays.

Walking into the main room, I found a giant banner hanging over the crowd who’d gathered to take part in the eerie festivities. Cloaks covered most of the men’s tuxedos, just as mine did. A plain Lone Ranger-style mask hid my identity. The women were the real stars of the night, decked out in all kinds of sexy, sinister attire.

I must’ve looked a bit overwhelmed by the plethora of willing women, as a man nudged my shoulder. “See any who are to your liking?”

With a nod, I answered his question. “Many are to my liking. This is by far the sexiest Halloween party I’ve ever been invited to.”

“Me too,” the man said then chuckled. “But I’m not here to shop for a new sub; I’ve got me a permanent one now.” He reached out to shake my hand. “Dr. Owen Cantrell.”

As I shook his hand, I recalled hearing that name before—then it struck me. “You’re that plastic surgeon to the stars. Or you were before that reality show ended. I believe it was titled Beverly Hills Reconstruction. I’m based out of Los Angeles too. Nixon Slaughter. I own and operate Champlain Services.”

“I’ve heard of that,” Owen said as he nodded. “It’s an environmental agency.”

To say I was proud of my company was too small a word. That company had taken a lot of time to build and to make a name for itself. After years of hard work, I’d accomplished more than I had ever dreamed. We worked worldwide, and the best part was that we were helping the planet and future generations.

Shoving my hands into my pockets, I rocked on my feet, pride overflowing inside of me. “So you’ve heard of my little endeavor?”

“Who hasn’t?” he asked with a grin. “I also read something in the L.A. Times about you and a couple of other guys building some new club downtown. An exclusive one much like the select few nightclubs in Los Vegas. When do you suppose that’ll be opening?”

“We’re hoping to have it open for a New Year’s Eve bash. That’s the target date for the grand opening.” I pulled a business card out of the breast pocket of my jacket and handed it to Owen. “Here’s my number. Give me a call, and I’ll set you and a date up for that, on the house.”

He pocketed the card and clapped me on the back. “Cool. We’ll be there. Thanks, man.” He pulled out a card of his own and gave it to me. “And if you know of anyone who needs my services, you give them my number. And let them know if they say you referred them, they’ll get a ten percent discount.”

I put away his card as I said, “Will do, partner.”

A woman with long, silky black hair, wearing a barely-there teddy and a giant mask with peacock feathers, came to Owen’s side. He put his arm around her, pulling her close to his side. “Allow me to introduce you to the woman who’ll be my date at your grand opening. This is Petra, my wife.”

She extended a long, slender hand and I took it, delivering a kiss to the top of it. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Petra. I’m Nixon Slaughter. I look forward to seeing you both at my nightclub on New Year’s Eve. You’ll be my honored guests.”

“Oh,” she looked at her husband. “That club, I read about it.” Her dark eyes turned to mine. “Have you come up with a name for it yet? Last I read, you and your partners hadn’t.”

Shaking my head, I shoved my hands back into my pockets. “No, we’re at an impasse. But we’ll come up with something soon—just as soon as we can figure out how to get Gannon Forester to stop shooting down all of our ideas.”

Petra’s eyes lit up as she said, “How about Club Exclusive? You know, because it’s catering to an exclusive branch of society, the ultra-wealthy?”

“I’ll run it by my partners.” Our attention was then taken by someone who’d gotten to the mic on the main stage.

“Happy Halloween, everybody!” the Master of Ceremonies called out.

Thunderous applause boomed throughout the large room. Owen gave me a nod, and he and his wife moved forward to get closer to the stage. I stood back, watching the crowd move in. I wasn’t too keen on being in the midst of a crowd. I liked to be near an exit most times—it was an odd little quirk of mine. Getting trampled in a panicked frenzy was a bit of a phobia I had.

Thankfully, staying on the fringes of any crowd kept me sane. A waiter came by with a tray of assorted cocktails. I picked up a clear drink that had some cherries floating in it. When I took a little taste, I found it was minty and fresh.

Looking back at the stage, I found four people lining up on it. One man and three women—all wearing red cloaks—were getting into position. Chains fell from the rafters, and more men came onto the stage to string the women up.

Playing with ropes and chains wasn’t a thing I’d ever done. Not that I wouldn’t like to someday, but I just didn’t have the know-how to put all that stuff up in a space. And I couldn’t have a room at home, the way a lot of Doms did. My parents visited from their home in Texas and stayed with me about three or four times a year. They’d usually stay for a week each time, and Mom was a nosy little woman. I’d never get away with having a red room of pain in my place.

Not to mention, Malibu beach houses weren’t quite the place to practice things that had women screaming. The cops would be called, that was a given.

So I was left with dabbling with my little fetish in another place. A few people knew my sinister secret. My partners, and my best friend, Shanna. My partners thought it was badass. Shanna thought it was freakish and that I’d get over it one day and grow the hell up.

Shanna and I had been friends back in our tiny hometown of Pettus, Texas. When I came out to L.A., she got mad at me for leaving her all alone in the boring town. After I’d established myself, I gave in to her pleas and let her come out and live at my place until she was able to stand on her own two feet. A thing she did pretty rapidly. It was when she was living with me that she found out about my little secret.

I’d brought a woman home with me one night during the first week Shanna was there. I’d forgotten she was there, to be honest. I was spanking the woman, and she was moaning—a lot—and begging me to hit her harder. Shanna knocked on the bedroom door and yelled at me to come out and talk to her. Which I did, reluctantly sending the woman home as Shanna berated me for my unforgivable behavior. She told me Fifty Shades sucked and anyone who followed such a mindless plot was a goddamned fool, a thing she knew I wasn’t.

I was expecting another berating and a long sermon to come from her when I returned home from this trip. I’d managed to duck out of town before she could catch me and try to stop me from going to Portland—knowing what I did whenever I traveled there.

“Excuse me, please,” came a soft voice as a woman touched my arm to get me to take a step to one side, allowing her to move into the crowd.

She only made it a few steps in front of me before the outer wall of people stopped her forward progression. Even from behind she was alluring.

Long legs, covered in torn black fishnet stockings, ended in a pair of red heels. A black bodice clung to her curves; her round ass gave way to a dip in her back, displayed by a panel of see-thru black lace splitting the silky material right down the middle.

She wore her hair in a long dark braid that she had pulled over her left shoulder. When she turned around, clearly annoyed that she couldn’t see anything from where she was, her blue eyes met mine.

Lifting my drink to her, I said, “Hey.”

Hey? Really? How lame am I?

Chapter 2

Katana

Although the night had started out badly, I found myself looking into the most gorgeous set of deep green eyes I’d ever seen. The mask he wore did little to hide the fact that the tall, muscular man was handsome. “Hey,” he said to me as he raised his glass.

I needed a drink desperately. A thing he must’ve noticed as my eyes moved from his gaze to his almost full glass. Just then a waiter walked behind him, and he stopped the guy, grabbing me a drink off the full tray.

Handing me a dark drink with a lime wedge hanging on the rim of the clear highball glass, he smiled at me. “Would you care for a drink?”

“I’m dying for one, actually.” I took the drink from him and struggled to be somewhat classy, taking a dainty sip instead of downing it the way I wanted to.

The last week had been hellish. I hadn’t paid attention to my schedule and had set up not two or three deadlines for myself, but ten of them. As a freelance book cover designer, I was self-employed, and that meant I was my own boss, a thing that was new to me. Not experienced in management, things had gotten out of hand. I’d get it down eventually, I knew I would—but the week had taken its toll on me.

One would think going to a BDSM club for a Halloween party would be the last place an overworked woman would want to go. But being able to give my whole self over to someone else was always a relief. So I took the invite sent to me by my friend Blyss. We’d met long ago, when I was just a kid sent to an orphanage after my mother disappeared. Blyss and I were a lot alike. We were both quiet and kept to ourselves. We’d written to one another when I was sent to live with an elderly couple in foster care, and she stayed at the orphanage. We kept in contact just so we both knew there was at least one person in the world who knew we existed.

Blyss had met the man she’d eventually married at this club, and she had encouraged me to check it out by coming to their first annual Halloween Ball. She knew I had little experience in the BDSM world but assured me that didn’t matter. I could just watch things this first time. If someone did ask me to do anything, she told me to let them know about my inexperience.

I’d hoped she and her husband, Troy, would be at the club for the big bash, but he didn’t want to bring her back to the place for some reason. I thought it was odd that he wouldn’t want to come back to a place that had brought them together.

“Do you come here often?” the hunky man asked me, shaking me from my thoughts.

Only then did I realize I hadn’t even said thank you. “Oh, jeez!” I grimaced and felt the plastic of my mask gouge into my cheeks. “I’m sorry. It’s been a hell of a week. First, let me say thanks for grabbing me a drink. I need copious amounts of alcohol to rid my mind of all the clutter that’s been burning through it for over a week. And second, let me answer your question. No, I don’t come here often. This is my first time.”

When his lips pulled up into one of the best smiles I’d ever seen, I couldn’t help but notice his perfect teeth. “First time, huh? Any experience with this type of thing?”

My body tensed. I wasn’t used to talking about where I’d gotten my experience, limited as it was. “Well, I had this boyfriend when I was nineteen. He liked to spank me. And that turned into a little more, a little bondage.” I hesitated to tell him the rest, as our little playtime hadn’t ended well. I didn’t want him to think I was scared by what had happened. But Blyss had urged me to be truthful with any man I might consider doing anything with, so I went on, “In the end, the BDSM thing turned into just plain physical abuse, coupled with mental abuse. It ended when he went to jail for beating the hell out of me and leaving me with a broken arm and jaw.”

“Damn.” His one-word answer had me looking down. I knew he felt sorry for me and probably thought of me as damaged goods. His fingers touched my chin, pulling my face up. I saw the concern in his green eyes. “Are you okay now?”

I nodded. “That was a few years ago. I got over it,” I told him.

And I had, for the most part. The only remnant from that horrible time in my life was a nightmare sneaking up on me every now and then, telling me I still had a little damage leftover from the brute.

“You can call me Mr. S. What should I call you?” He shifted his weight as he looked me over.

“Katana,” I said, as I hadn’t thought of an alternate name for myself. Blyss hadn’t told me about doing that. “Katana Reeves.”

“Nice to meet you, Katana Reeves.” He jerked his head to one side. “I’m not into crowds. You wanna join me in one of the smaller rooms? We can watch a scene together.”

After a nod, he took me by the hand and off we went, leaving the large room behind us. A step behind him, I took the opportunity to chug my drink while he couldn’t see me. I needed to take the edge off, and quickly.

As he pushed open a door, I heard horrible groans and saw a woman all tied up and bent over some kind of a table. Hushed whispers were heard as a handful of people watched what seemed to be a brutal scene.

Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted a bar and pulled at my hand to get Mr. S to let me go. He stopped and turned to look at me, seeing the empty glass in my hand. He smiled at me, and we headed to the bar first. “What would you like, Katana?”

“Bourbon and Coke, please.” I already felt like he was taking care of me, and it felt awesome—exactly what I needed after my hectic week.

“A double shot of Michter’s Celebration and Coke for the lady and some of the same for me, straight on the rocks.” He set his half-full glass on the bar, and I placed my empty one next to his. His dark green eyes moved to my lips. “I like that black lipstick you’ve got on. Shame it’s going to get all messed up later.”

His confident statement took me by surprise, and all I could do was stare at the hot man who seemed to be made of muscles. A shiver ran through me as our drinks were put in front of us. He took mine, placing it in my hand. Then he grabbed his drink in one hand, my hand with the other, and took me to a little table for two at the back of the room.

I gulped as I heard the loud smacking sound of leather meeting flesh and the yell of pain that followed. My eyes closed as I thought about what I was getting myself into.

His arm moved over my shoulder, and he drew me in close. His lips grazed my ear as he said softly, “You’re perfectly safe with me, Katana. No reason to worry at all. Just sit back and relax. Enjoy the show—then perhaps you’ll think about what you and I can come up with together. I promise you won’t feel abused while in my hands.”

The way he spoke, the look in his eyes, the way he touched me—it all made me feel at ease. He was a perfect stranger, yet I felt drawn to him in a way I’d never felt with any other man. Another smacking sound had me looking at the couple on the small stage.

Sagging in the ropes, the woman seemed beaten down. My heart ached as I knew how that felt. In more ways than one. Lyle Strickland wasn’t the first person to beat the hell out of me and leave me wishing for death to take the pain away. But he’d sure as hell be the last.

When the woman’s Dom untied her, he carried her wilted body to a bed and laid her down with gentleness. He got up to leave her, and her arms went out to him as she moaned, “Please, sir.”

“Now you want me?” her Dom asked her. “I thought you wanted that other man.”

“Only you, sir. I’m only meant for you. Please take me. I am yours.”

Since we didn’t get to see most of the show, I figured she must’ve been cheating on her Dom and had gotten caught. My eyes cut to Mr. S’s, finding him none too pleased with the scene. A hard line had his lips clamped shut.

He and I both seemed out of place in the BDSM club. The look on his face was different from the look most of the other men who watched the show had. He looked disgusted, while most of the others looked enticed. I had to admit, that particular scene wasn’t a thing I liked either.

If someone cheated on you, you let their sorry ass go. No need to whip them into loving you. As if that could even happen in real life.

It came as no shock to me when he leaned in close once more. “I’ve got a few toys at my hotel. What do you say we ditch this place and head over there?”

My brain interjected. Um, hello, Katana. You don’t even know this man’s real name or one damn thing about him except he’s into BDSM.

Cocking one brow, I dared to ask, “Do you think you could give me some identification before I take you up on that offer?”

Without missing a beat, he pulled out his wallet and showed me his California driver’s license. “I’m Nixon Slaughter, owner of Champlain Services in Los Angeles.” He went one step further and took a business card out of his wallet, slipping it into my hand before putting his wallet away. “That’s my number. Feel better about being alone with me now, Katana Reeves?”

With a nod, I agreed to what he wanted. “I’m in your hands now, Mr. S.”

“I think for tonight I’d like to be called Master, my little slave girl.” He got up, took my hand, and away we went.

Chapter 3

Nixon

Heading into the lobby of the Heathman Hotel, Katana and I got a few stares as we strolled in. She’d donned a red cloak to cover her little naughty negligee, but we’d kept the masks on. It felt more fun that way.

In the elevator, we rode up to my room with two other couples. They seemed to sense we were up to no good and stayed on the far side, away from us. When we got out, the others stayed inside, and we both laughed as we walked down the hallway.

Putting my arm around her shoulders, I gave her a little squeeze. “Think we intimidated them?”

“Seems like we did.” Katana smiled, and it made my heart beat faster. Her smile was amazing. So bright, brilliant, and genuine. “I guess they thought they’d ended up in an elevator with a couple of freaks.”

“Didn’t they?” I asked as I chuckled and pulled out the keycard to open the door to my hotel room.

I let her go in first, and she looked around at the glamorous room. “I’ve lived in Portland for a long time now and have never been inside this place. It’s like a Portland treasure.”

“It is. This hotel is where I always stay when I come to town.” I closed the door, locking it behind us.

She turned around at the sound and looked at the door. “Just so you know, I’ve never done this.”

“I thought you said you had, but it turned into a bad thing?” Was she getting cold feet? I hadn’t even done anything to her yet.

She pulled off the cloak and draped it over the back of the chair in front of the small desk. “I mean, I haven’t gone to bed with a man I’ve just met.” She looked at me and grinned shyly. “Or are you one of those BDSM guys who just get off on the punishment phase and not the sexual one?”

Stepping out of my shoes, I wondered what she was thinking about all of this. She seemed calm, but she had just come into a hotel room with a stranger. She and I had discussed nothing on the way in. Nor had I tested the waters on anything yet.

For my part, I felt very unlike myself—and I had no idea why she would have this effect on me. But I was going to get past that for sure. Katana had a beauty about her that intrigued me. She wasn’t able to hold eye contact long at all. And when we were alone in the back of the car on the way to the hotel, she hadn’t spoken unless I’d said something.

It was almost as if I was a virgin teen again with no real clue as to what to do, and Katana seemed to be having the same reaction to me. I found myself stumbling over my words as I tried to answer her question. “I, um, well—let’s see. I don’t get off on hitting, if that’s what you’re asking me. And I’d like to have sex, if that’s okay with you.”

She looked down, her eyes glued to the floor. “Okay. I mean, I’d like to have sex too. It’s actually been a long time since I’ve done anything.”

“How long’s a long time, Katana?” I took my jacket off and went to hang it up.

“A year or so.”

I dropped the jacket on the floor and turned around. “Are you shitting me?”

She shook her head, and my heart went out to the young woman. “About a year and a half, actually.” She looked up and looked around the room, her eyes landing on the minifridge. “I don’t suppose you have any alcohol in there?”

I unbuttoned my shirt, now completely understanding her need for alcohol. The poor thing was pent up. I could fix that. “No need. I know how to quench your thirst. On the bed, on your back. Your Master is about to please his little slave.”

“Should I undress first?” She turned one heeled foot inward as she put her hand on her hip.

“No. Just do as I’ve told you.” I stripped down to my tight black boxer briefs and went to the side of the bed where she lay down, waiting for me. “Close your eyes, slave. Relax.”

Picking up her foot, I ran my lips up her long leg then grabbed the top of her thigh-high fishnet stocking with my teeth, pulling it down until it was at her ankle. I pulled off her high heel then removed the stocking.

Running my hands up her bare leg, I felt goosebumps as they pimpled her cool flesh. I did the same thing to her other leg before I settled my body between her legs. She was nervous; I could tell from her shallow breathing.

“One of the rules of the club is that everyone is screened for diseases and the females are in charge of the birth control.” I leaned in and blew on her panty-covered cunt, her essence already pouring through the thin fabric. “Have you taken care of all that, slave?”

“I have, Master.” I watched as her hands moved into fists on top of the bedspread. She was getting tense in anticipation of what I was about to do.

“You have nothing to fear. Our safe word is red. Say yellow if you’re beginning to get uncomfortable. Got it?” I blew on her pussy again.

“Got it, Master.” She began to tremble, and I knew she was letting her mind get ahead of her, worrying about what she’d gotten into.

Little did she know she had a pretty great guy who’d make sure she got what she’d gone into the Dungeon looking for. “I’m going to rip your panties off and cut your clothes away from your body. Not to worry though, I’ll have something sent up for you in the morning. I want you all night long, slave.”

She tensed up even more but said nothing. I smiled as it thrilled me to know she trusted me so much, even when she had absolutely no reason to at this point.

With one swift pull, I ripped her panties off and put my mouth on her cunt, running my tongue through her warm folds. She moaned softly then got louder as I kissed her pussy lips. Lips that hadn’t seen any action in way too long.

The sounds she made had my cock growing more and more. I knew right then that it would be hard to keep myself under control with her. But I liked a challenge, so I thought only of pleasing her and ignored my straining male member. He’d get what he craved soon enough, and plenty of it, when I stuffed my fat cock into her soaked pussy after she’d come a few times for me.

Moving my tongue inside her and lapping up her decadent taste, I lost control for a bit as my brain took a siesta while my inner sex god feasted on her delicious cunt. Oh, but she tasted like sin wrapped in heaven!

As great as she tasted then, I had to know what an orgasm would do to enhance that. Moving my tongue out of her, I went to work on her clit, which had swollen to three times its original size. Rolling it between my lips, I sucked it then moved my lips up and down it as it grew even more.

Her moans grew louder, and she arched up to me. I could hear her fists pounding the bed, and then she whimpered as her body let go. I moved down, eager to get my tongue inside her to feel how she contracted with her orgasm.

Fluids met my hungry tongue as I shoved it into her tight pussy. She clenched down on my tongue as I moved it back and forth, encouraging her body to keep coming for me. Amazed by everything she gave me, I knew I’d picked one ripe female for the night. I’d make this a night she’d remember for a very long time. A night that she could get off to if she didn’t have sex again for a long time.

I pulled my head away from her soaking pussy to look at her. She looked gorgeous as she panted, her eyes closed. The mask was still on her face, hiding her a bit from me. For one moment I thought about taking the masks off. But I shook my head. The masks lent anonymity to what we were doing. That was part of the thrill—fucking someone you didn’t have all the information about, and not caring.

Getting off the bed, I saw her gorgeous blue eyes open, and she watched me as I went to get some things. “Thank you, Master. I really needed that. You were right. I didn’t need any alcohol to get into this. You’re very good at what you do.”

“Glad you liked it, slave. Now tell me how much pain you want to feel, and I’ll give that to you, too.” I pulled some of my favorite toys out of my suitcase and turned around with four sets of fluffy cuffs. “And how do you feel about being restrained?”

She sat up and ran her hands over her heaving breasts. “I haven’t been bound in a long time. I’ve never allowed that after what happened to me.” My face must’ve shown my disappointment because she quickly added, “I trust you, Master. I’m in your capable hands and will do anything you want to.” She laid back down. “Go ahead, strap me down. I am yours to toy with.”

My cock jumped with her words. Mine to toy with?

She really would be a treat!

Chapter 4

Katana

The only words I could use to describe Nixon’s body were totally ripped. The bulge in his tight black underwear left nothing to the imagination. He was hung better than anyone I’d ever been with and my pussy was throbbing with need for his massive appendage.

The last click I heard left me pinned to the bed in a spread-eagled position. My negligee was still intact, but I knew that wouldn’t be the case for long as he headed back to me with a knife in his hand. The light glistened off the long blade; my heart sprang into action with the fear the object invoked. I gulped, closing my eyes as I felt the cold blade against my skin.

Soft ripping sounds met my ears as he cut away the flimsy material that barely hid my body from his gorgeous green eyes. Once he had cut away everything, I felt the tip of the knife as he moved it over me. He stopped at one nipple, and I could feel the sensitive tip pulsing. I had no idea knife-play could be so enticing and erotic. Whenever I’d thought about it before, I thought I’d be much too afraid to enjoy it at all.

How wrong I’d been.

The knife went down my side, and Nixon’s mouth came to replace the blade at my nipple. He pulled it with his teeth, and I moaned as a slight pain jolted through me in the best possible way. Then he soothed it with some gentle licks before biting down, making me yelp.

His laugh was deep and sinister. He enjoyed making me cry out in pain. The blade moved up and down my side, igniting both chills and heat inside of me. It would be so easy for him to rip me open with that long sharp knife, yet he wasn’t going to do that. Something inside me told me that.

Nixon pulled the knife over my stomach then up to the other tit, and he moved the edge up until I felt the sharpness at the base of my nipple. One swift movement and I’d lose it. I stopped breathing.

Shit, have I handed myself over to a murderer?

Sure, he’d given me his card with his name and number on it, but what would that matter if I was dead?

The safe word, red, ruminated inside my brain, but before I could say it the knife was gone, and his hot mouth was on my tit. He sucked it hard and long, and the cold knife came to rest on my stomach as he sucked me. I groaned as the pain from his strong sucks mixed with pleasure deep in my core. I’d never felt anything like it. I’d never had anyone suck on my tit with such aggression and for so long, and the climax that washed over me took me by surprise.

“God!” I cried out with the sensation. My entire body pulsed with a very different orgasm than I’d ever experienced.

Nixon’s voice came softly near my ear, “Hush now, slave. We’ve only just begun.”

My entire body quivered. We’d only just begun?

I had already ridden two monstrous waves and we’d only just begun?

Did I have the stamina to make it through the night?

I watched him walk away from me, his fine ass moving with each step.

Yeah, I can find the stamina to make it through the night with him!

My arms longed to wrap around his muscular body, and without conscious thought I pulled to test the cuffs holding them. My legs pulled too, wanting to wrap around him, to hold him to me.

My pussy, still throbbing from the orgasm, wanted more. It wanted him buried so deep inside me that it defied possibility. I ached to feel him all the way up to my heart. And I wanted it now. “Please, Master, take me now,” the words came out with a whimpered plea.

He stopped and spun around. His eyes were hard and cold all of a sudden. “Are you telling your Master what to do, slave? That’s grounds for punishment—surely you know that.”

I didn’t know that. I mean I did, but I didn’t. I thought I’d phrased it in such a way that it didn’t come off as telling him what to do, but I must’ve been wrong.

He went to his suitcase, pulling out a long black leather belt. I gasped as he came toward me and undid all the cuffs. I lay perfectly still. He grabbed me by the waist and pulled me around until I was face down on his lap.

One smack with the belt had me yelping, and he gave me three more in rapid succession. “Are you going to tell your Master what to do anymore, slave?”

I gauged how my body reacted to the spanking and found it was on fire. And not in a bad way. My hesitation to answer him had me getting three more hits, and I moaned as I felt my pussy creaming with desire.

I wanted more.

I kept my mouth shut, and he gave me three more before asking, “Does my little slave like to be punished?”

“Yes,” I whimpered. “More, please.”

“And there you go again.” He gave me three more smacks then reached under me and inserted his finger into me, finding me wetter than I’d ever been in my life. “Ah, I see why you’re being so disobedient now.” He pumped his finger into me and used his free hand to smack my ass some more.

Insane as it might sound, I was getting off to that in a huge way. His finger kept moving in and out as his other hand smacked me over and over. Then he moved his finger in a come-hither motion, hitting my G-spot—which I hadn’t even been sure I had, as no other man had ever found it, nor had I. I burst into an instant orgasm and cried with the release.

Tears flowed from my eyes like rivers as my body let everything go. The tension I had been carrying around for weeks—maybe even months or years—seemed to turn to water inside me and rushed out of my body through my eyes and my pussy.

Before I knew what was happening, he’d moved me to lie on my back and pulled my ass to the edge of the bed. He got on his knees and lapped up the thick cream I’d emitted for him. The sounds coming from deep in his throat made me think he’d never tasted anything he’d ever enjoyed so much. It stirred something inside of me.

Why can this only last one night?

I shook my head at that thought and wiped my eyes. I couldn’t go thinking about the future. Who knew, he might come back for more now and then.

When he’d gotten his fill, he stood up, wiping my wetness from his chin with the back of his hand. “Suck me off.”

I hurried to get on my hands and knees on the bed, and his erection was right at my level. I eased his underwear off his massive cock and found it was hard as a rock.

Taking it in my hands, I looked at the beautiful thing and licked my lips, anticipating how full my mouth would be. I opened and closed my mouth a few times, stretching my jaw, and then licked the tip and took hold of the base of his cock.

Only the top quarter fit into my mouth, and I used my hands to cover the rest. After only a few strokes I felt the need to give him more. He’d given me so much, after all.

I pulled my mouth from him and noticed the look he gave me, his expression one of confusion. But he quickly understood what I was up to ‘when I got on my back and let my head fall over the side of the bed. He smiled and put his cock into my mouth. In that position, I could take him all in, but he’d have to do the moving.

His dick slid into my mouth and hit the back of my throat, making me gag a bit, but he pushed it further down. I closed my eyes as tears began to fall—not because I was in pain, but just a natural reaction to gagging. He moved slowly at first, gradually thrusting faster and faster until he shot his load straight down my throat.

“God!” he shouted as he pulled his cock out of my mouth. “Fuck!” He breathed heavily as he sat on the bed, huffing and puffing. “No one’s ever done that for me. I’ve always been told I’m too big.”

I sat up, and he turned his head to look at me. I couldn’t help but smile, feeling extraordinarily pleased with myself. “You’re not too big; you’re just right. For me, anyway.”

A smile crept across his face, and he tossed me onto my back and kissed me hard. Our tastes converged, and we both groaned with how well they went together.

When he mounted me, I spread my legs wide for him and he slid right in, his cock hard once more, stretching me to fit his size. It burned, and I moaned with the pain. But then it felt amazing. He was hitting deeper in me than I’d ever been hit. Our bodies worked each other with a force I’d never known.

When we both came at the same time, our eyes locked. I felt it all so deeply. He stilled inside me as we tried to catch our breaths. We just stared at each other, his arms braced on either side of my head, panting like animals. I had no idea what he was thinking. But I had my own thoughts to focus on.

This can’t be real!

Chapter 5

Nixon

Our time together passed much too quickly. Katana and I did everything I could think of, and not once did she seem the least bit apprehensive about anything I did to her. For a couple of complete strangers, we connected in a way that felt as if we’d known one another forever.

We’d only had a couple of hours of sleep before the driver I’d hired was expected to arrive to take me to the airport, where I’d hop on the company jet back to L.A. I had work to get to.

When I rolled over to wake her, I saw her mask had come off as she slept. Mine had stayed on, but I pulled it off as I gazed at her.

Katana’s face was just as gorgeous as I’d thought it would be. I’d pulled her dark hair out of the braid at one point during our night, and the long strands were everywhere. She looked like an angel as she slept, her lips swollen from all the kissing we’d done. I pushed a lock of hair off her face, and she moaned a bit before her eyes fluttered open.

I couldn’t stop the smile that took over my mouth—she looked too perfect. “Hi.”

“Hi,” she replied with a stretch. Then her hand came up to caress my cheek. “You’re even more handsome without the mask.”

“And you’re even more beautiful without yours,” I kissed her cheek. “Did you sleep well?” Before she could answer, I pulled her into my arms, holding her in a way I rarely did with anyone, especially not anyone I’d done this sort of thing with.

She cuddled into my chest. “You wore me out completely. I slept like a baby. Not even a dream made it through.”

With a chuckle, I agreed, “We did seem to give it our all, didn’t we?”

“I should think so. It’ll tide me over for quite some time,” she said then rolled off me and got out of bed, heading to the bathroom.

I watched her round ass, admiring the dimple at the top of each cheek as she left the room. And I caught myself sighing. “What have you done to me, you little vixen?”

The sex had been better than any I could recall. She felt better in my arms and underneath me than anyone ever had. But this was a one-time thing.

Sure, I could probably call her up now and then and see if she’d like to have another one-nighter, but that wasn’t really how I liked to do things. I preferred to hit it and quit it. It kept things uncomplicated, and that was my goal.

I heard the shower running and decided now was the time to call the front desk and have something sent up for her to wear home. “Rhoda speaking. How may I help you, Mr. Slaughter?”

“I need some clothes sent up in size two.” I’d checked the tag on her naughty nighty to get her size. She had red heels so I ordered something that would match them. “Can you send up a black dress? Something nice and expensive. Matching bra and panties too.” I had to guess on the size of that. “The bra is a thirty-two D. And if you find a nice necklace that would accent it, please add that on; money isn’t a concern. I want the best of everything. And please have it delivered to my room as quickly as you can.”

“Yes, sir. Give me half an hour, and I’ll have it sent right up.”

I hung up the hotel phone and went to the closet to retrieve my clothes for the trip back home. My cell rang, and I went back to get it, seeing it wasn’t a number I had in my contacts. “Hello?”

“Hey, is this Nixon?” a man asked me.

“Yes. And this is?” I looked in the mirror at my stubbled cheeks. Maybe I’ll grow my beard out, I thought to myself. A little something to remind me of last night.

“This is Owen Cantrell. You gave me your card last night. I was just calling to check on you. I lost track of you last night and wanted to be sure you made it out safely.”

“Um, yeah, I made it out all right.” I had no idea why he’d be worried about something like that.

He soon told me why. “That was some scene, huh? I don’t think I’ve ever been more afraid in my entire life.”

“Of what?” I asked, as I was clearly in the dark.

“The explosions, of course,” he enlightened me.

“Explosions?”

“Yeah,” he went on. “Wait, did you leave before that happened?”

“I did.” I walked back to the bed and sat down, feeling a little lightheaded. “So there were explosions? Was anyone hurt, or worse?”

“Thankfully no one was hurt. We all managed to make it out of there somehow.” He stopped, and I heard him make a smacking sound. “I’m sorry. I just had to give my wife a kiss. It was like we almost lost each other last night. It was awful. The Dungeon of Decorum seems like it’s probably at an end. It was completely destroyed.”

“I can’t believe it,” I mumbled. “What time did this happen?”

“Hell, I can’t even begin to tell you that. I couldn’t think straight until a little while ago. I was definitely suffering from a bit of shock. I just keep thinking how close my wife and I came to meeting our maker.”

“Wow. Looks like I dodged a bullet. Glad I found someone and we left early.” And I was glad of that for a couple other reasons too.

“Well, you and I need to hang out a bit when we get back to Los Angeles. I’d like to see you some time before New Year’s Eve. Catch you later, Nixon,” he said, then hung up.

My eyes flew to the bathroom door, where Katana was coming out. She’d wrapped her perfect body in a fluffy pink towel. “Did I hear you talking to someone?”

“Yeah,” I said as I put my cell down on the nightstand. “Seems we’ll never be going back to that club again.”

Her dark brows rose. “And why might that be?”

“It’s destroyed. Some explosions occurred. I don’t know the full story. One of my buddies from the club just called to ask if I had made it out okay.” I got up and walked straight to her, gathering her into my arms, still naked as the day I was born. “I’m so glad I got you out of there before anything happened, Katana.”

“My God, Nix. How lucky are we?” she asked, and I felt a chill run through her as her body shook a bit.

She’d called me Nix. My mother called me that. No one else ever had. I had a reputation that usually stopped anything like that. But I loved the way it sounded coming out of her mouth.

Pulling back, I didn’t let her go as I looked at her with a smile on my face. “Nix, huh? Okay, I’ll give you that one. But does that mean I get to call you Kat?”

With a sigh, she gave me a weak smile. “I don’t know if we’ll be doing anymore calling each other anything. When we leave here, this is over. No strings. I recall how this all works. We had one hot night, and there’ll be nothing more. I know the rules. I’m not going to bother you.”

I’d kind of like her to bother me.

I nodded, knowing she had had to sign something at the club that held her to that promise. But it didn’t stop me from feeling a bit bad about it.

I genuinely liked the woman. “You do have my number if you really need me. Not that I think you would—but if you do, you have it.”

“I won’t use it.” She turned her head. “That’s not what either of us went to that club for, right? One hot night of crazy sex is what we went there for, and we got that.” She looked back at me, and I saw something shimmer in the backs of her blue eyes. Her hands moved up my arms, reaching up to cradle my face. “I’ll keep the memory of last night locked away in my mind forever, Nixon Slaughter. It’s my most cherished one so far.” She kissed my lips softly.

Now it was my turn to feel the chill, and my body quaked for a moment. I tightened my hold on her, pulling her closer to me and kissing her back in a way I’d never done with another one-night stand sub.

A knock on the door interrupted what was sure to turn into another sexual escapade. My brain was thankful; my cock was not. “That would be your clothes. Put them on while I shower. Don’t you dare leave. I’ll have the driver I hired take you home after he takes me to the airport. I’d get you home first but I’ve got to go in to the office once I get back home. Most days are work days for me.”

“Okay,” she said with a smile. “That’s very sweet of you.”

Sweet? Was I being sweet?

I let her go and walked away, knowing I wasn’t being myself with her. I was anything but sweet. Back in L.A I was known for my aloofness and for never dating anyone for more than a couple weeks. Most of the time, business occupied my mind. I’d been accused of being neglectful by my dates, answering calls at dinner, getting up and walking away, leaving my dates alone with no explanation as to why.

As I showered, I tried to think about business to get my head back in working order, but Katana kept popping into my mind with memories of her sweet smile or her hot kiss.

I had to hurry up and get sexy little Katana home and away from me. Her hooks seemed to be sinking into me, and I couldn’t have that at all.

* * *

Chapter 6

Katana

Sitting down at my computer to get to work on a new book cover, I still wore the gorgeous dress Nix bought me. We’d parted ways only a couple of hours before, and his goodbye kiss still tingled on my lips.

I stared blankly at the computer screen. My mind couldn’t focus on anything other than the events of last night. When my cell rang, I jumped and looked at it, hoping it might be him.

But it couldn’t be him. He didn’t have my number. I had his, though I’d never call it. It wasn’t a sub’s place to call her Master, even if their pact was only for one night.

Blyss’s name lit up my phone, and I answered the call. “Hi, Blyss. How’s it going?”

“You sound way too calm, Katana. Didn’t you go to the club last night?” she asked.

“I did, and I left it only a short time after I arrived, as the most handsome Dom picked me before I had a chance to see much of the club you’ve told me so much about.” I got up and walked to the window to look outside as I conjured up the memory of the first time I’d laid eyes on Nix.

Blyss’s voice pulled me out of my reverie before I could really start daydreaming about the man. “So you weren’t in the club when all the chaos ensued then?”

Oh, that! “No. No, he and I left very early, thank God. Someone from the club called him and told him about it. Seems we dodged a bullet there.”

“That you did.” She seemed to be a lot calmer than before. “Okay, so this Dom, tell me all about him and what you guys did.”

I leaned my shoulder against the window pane and sighed. “He was the best lover I’ve ever had. Not that I’ve had that many. Okay, I’ve had two, and it’s been over a year since I’ve had sex of any kind.”

“You haven’t even masturbated?” she interrupted me.

“That’s personal!” I laughed. “But no, not even that. Maybe it seemed so intense and hugely satisfying because of that, I don’t know. But it was electric, and I can’t stop thinking about it. Is it possible to have a sex hangover, Blyss?”

She laughed. “I’ve had more than one of those. But then when you have a man as intense as mine, you get a thorough fucking at least once a month, with major fucks most days.”

“So that’s what it would be like if I had a long-term thing with a Dom?” I asked as the idea did things to my insides that made me quiver.

“Does last night have you thinking about finding yourself a full-time Dom, Katana?” she asked with a hint of humor in her voice.

“Well, not just any Dom would do. But my guy wasn’t into anything that lasts longer than one night. He doesn’t even live in this city.” I moved away from the window and went to sit back down.

“So was he able to get all that pent-up stress out of you? I know you had one hell of a crazy schedule last week—you were going insane.” She laughed again. “I hope he got that off your back.”

All the stress had melted away, and it had to be because of him. “Oh, yeah, he got rid of all that. Much better than the masseuse my friend recommended.”

She giggled knowingly. “I bet.”

Running my hand through my hair, I released the scent of the hotel shampoo and an image of Nixon flashed in my head. I had to think about something else. “So, how’s the hubby, Blyss? Is Troy doing okay?”

“He’s doing well. We’re about to take the kids out to window shop for Christmas presents,” she told me. “We do that every year so they can let us know all the things they want, and then we surprise them with a few of them on Christmas. It’s a fun tradition we’ve had for a few years.”

“Christmas already?” I had to ask. “It’s barely the day after Halloween.”

“Yeah, I know. This is the traditional day that we do this thing. That way we have lots of time to make sure we get them what they really want. I always have my Christmas shopping done before Thanksgiving. Because the day after Thanksgiving we set up the Christmas tree and I have presents ready to go right away. We’re big on the holidays in this family.”

“I’m glad you’ve found yourself a big family to live and love with. You deserve it all, Blyss,” I gushed. She’d been the best person I’d ever met while in the foster care system.

“Aw, thanks, Katana. You know you deserve happiness too.” She paused, and I could tell her wheels were spinning. “I worry about you sometimes. You stay alone too much, holed up in your little apartment in Portland, making those book covers. I know you’re making good money and all, but it takes away from your social life. You really need to get out more. Make a habit of it. Stop working at five or six, get yourself dolled up and go out instead of working all night.”

“I don’t know.” The thought of going out and maybe ending up in bed with another guy just hit me the wrong way all of a sudden. I knew I didn’t belong to Nixon, but there was something that told me I’d be disappointed if I went to bed with another man. Plus, I couldn’t think about anyone else at that moment, still overwhelmed by our amazing night together. “I’m not into clubbing. The only reason I registered with The Dungeon of Decorum is because of the safety net it provided me. No abuse is tolerated, and I had a number to call if that occurred.”

“Yeah, I know that bastard did a number on you back then. Do you know if he’s still in jail or not?” she asked with concern etching her voice.

I didn’t know a thing about the man who’d left permanent scars on my body, brain, and heart. “I don’t know anything about him. It’s been four years since I left Flagstaff. As far as I know, he doesn’t have a clue where I moved. Lyle Strickland is a man I try hard not to think about.” I paused for a moment, reflecting on the relationship I’d had two years after I left Lyle, after I’d moved to Portland. “I know he’s the main reason it didn’t work out with Jimmy, too. I just never trusted him the entire six months we were together.”

“I know how hard it is to find that trust again. I’ve had my fair share of torture in the past. Not that I want to get into any of that. That’s all better off left alone. Well, I better get going. I can hear the kids putting up a fuss already. Love you, Katana.”

“I love you too, Blyss. I’ll call you again soon. Have fun. Bye.” I ended the call and leaned my head back, thinking about my past.

When Lyle had come onto me just after I turned nineteen, I’d thought I had hit the jackpot. He was older, twenty-five, and so dominant. I suppose I liked that sort of thing because I’d never had anyone care that much about me. I took it as a sign that he really loved me.

Turned out, he really loved controlling my every move, and then he really loved beating the shit out of me. My bruises and broken bones healed, but my heart and soul were left in rough shape.

Even if Nixon Slaughter were knocking down my door trying to date me, I wasn’t in any shape to be the woman for him. Still having my moments of being an emotional wreck at times proved I wasn’t ready to be anyone’s girl.

Poor Jimmy had got the shit end of the stick when he got with me. As a couple of years had passed since the horror show with Lyle, I’d thought I was over everything. Jimmy was anything but dominating. Poor guy was a pushover. I suppose that’s why things ended so fast between us. I pushed him to lord over me, but that wasn’t for him. He couldn’t do it.

I knew I’d had a rough life. I knew I had mental issues with that. Was it so wrong of me to need a man who would take control and treat me like I was his?

It didn’t seem that modern women wanted what I wanted. Not most of them anyway. I wanted that firm hand. I wanted that rough touch. Craved it. And I thought I’d found that with Lyle. But what I found instead was that you couldn’t trust every dominant man.

And I couldn’t be happy with a man who wasn’t at least somewhat dominating, either.

I felt stuck in a terribly deep rut. The thing I wanted the most was the thing that had hurt me so much in the past and made me wary of relationships. And I had no idea what I’d ever do to remedy that. Being alone wasn’t the answer either.

Getting up, I went back to my desk and tapped on the computer to bring up pictures of hot, muscular men so I could pick one for the next book cover I’d be making.

One by one, I blew them all off as none compared to Nixon. His tight abs, his broad chest with massive pecs, his hulking biceps—no one compared to him.

How in the hell would I ever get him out of my mind?

Would time eventually rid me of that perfect memory? Would I even want it to?

It had one perfect night. The best night of my entire life. Why would I want to forget about it?

Maybe because it already haunted me. Maybe because I already knew no other man could come close to comparing to Nixon Slaughter.

I was doomed.

Chapter 7

Nixon

Fall weather made the drive to work a pleasure. I didn’t even mind the hour I had to sit in traffic at the airport. It gave me time to think about my night with Katana, after all.

It’d only been a little while since I’d left her, but I had to admit I found myself missing her a little too often. She had my number, and I kept wishing she’d call. Maybe she’d ask me to come down and play for the weekend or something. But the phone never rang.

When traffic began rolling again, I made it all the way to my office building. Champlain Services, located inside the Century Plaza Towers on Century Park East, was my home away from home. With six offices on the top floor, we had a great view of the city.

When I came into the reception area, I saw my admin assistant, Blake, busy on the phone. I gave him a wave and headed to my office. He paused in the middle of his conversation to call out to me, “Don’t forget you have the Skype meeting this morning, boss.”

“Thanks.” I had forgotten about the meeting, but I wasn’t behind schedule even with the hour lost in traffic.

Getting into my office, I turned on the computer monitor on the wall and got ready for the meeting with my partners in the nightclub endeavor. The call came in from Gannon Forester’s office, and I clicked the accept button and found his adorable little secretary looking at me from the conference room in his office. “Good morning, Mr. Slaughter. It’s nice to see you.”

“You too, Janine. Is Gannon there?” I pulled up my most comfortable chair and settled in for the meeting.

“Yes, sir. And I’ll be adding Mr. Harlow to this meeting in just one moment. Sit tight,” she said with a smile, then pushed her thick-framed glasses up her nose a bit.

After a minute, August Harlow’s face filled half the screen. “Hey, ugly,” I joked with him.

“Hey, precious,” he said with a chuckle. “How’s life treating ya? You weren’t in town yesterday. Where might you have been?”

“Oh, nowhere special. Did you miss me?” I winked at him.

“Of course, my little buttercup. Halloween was nothing without your sweet little ass there,” he kidded with me. “But seriously, you missed one hell of a good time. Gannon and I had some fun with some nurses. At least they were dressed as nurses. There were three of them and only two of us, and one nearly got left out until I decided I could take on two at a time.”

“What a hero,” I said as I clapped. “Always helping out the citizens of our fair country, August.” Retired from the Marines at only thirty, August had seen some pretty grim shit that he didn’t like to talk about.

“I do what I can. Being retired, I can only help stateside. I like to keep up the morale over here.” He laughed again, then Gannon’s face filled the other side of my screen.

Gannon’s smile was bright as always as he greeted us, “Morning, gentlemen. And I do use that term lightly.”

August took the lead, as usual. “So the time has come for us to put our bickering behind us and agree on a name for this nightclub.”

We’d argued over this one thing for far too long. Seemed it was time to shit or get off the pot. So I gave them my idea one more time. “Let the record show, I like the name Club X.”

I knew it would be Gannon who had something to say about that. “And I’ve told you before, that name is much too common.”

August pointed out one major problem to Gannon. “Yes, but Gannon, you have yet to come up with a single name. You’ve had no problem shooting down all the ones we’ve come up with, though. So I am throwing you into the middle of this debate and challenging you to come up with a name on the fly. You have one minute.”

Giving Gannon one minute to do anything was a stretch. He was a thinker, not a shoot from the hip kind of guy. “What?” He looked back and forth at August and me with a look of panic on his face. “I’m not that creative. You guys are.”

I looked at my watch then back at Gannon. “You’re wasting time, Gannon.”

August looked at his watch too. “The time is ticking away. Thirty seconds, Gannon, or we’re sticking with Club X.”

“No! Wait—give me one more minute. I’m terrible under pressure.” Gannon pinched the bridge of his nose, looking as if he had to use all of his concentration to get a name to come to his business brain.

August wasn’t messing around and wasn’t going to give him any more time. “Nope, no extra time. And we’re coming in on ten, nine …”

I sat back, pretty sure the club would get the moniker I’d come up with.

Gannon’s eyes popped open wide, and he looked as if a lightbulb had just gone off inside his head. “Swank!”

I had to smile; I liked the name immediately.

August nodded, and he also wore a broad smile. “Swank. I like it.”

I chuckled. “Me too. Swank it is, then.” I looked at August. “Seems we’ve had a productive meeting, August. Time to get back to our real jobs. Catch you guys later in the week. Nixon, out.” I clicked off the screen and got up to get to my real job.

There were a couple of things I needed to get to that day, and one of them looked to be lunch with my best friend, Shanna. Not business, but a necessary meeting nonetheless as it had been over a week since we’d talked.

Shanna and I had met in kindergarten at our school in the tiny South Texas town of Pettus. She and I used to walk to school together, as her family lived a few houses down from mine. Our relationship had always been like a brother-sister type thing, with no romance involved.

When I’d come out to California to go to Berkeley, she’d stayed home and gone to the community college there, the only thing she and her parents could afford. Shanna gained an associate’s degree but never got past that. Instead, she got her grandmother to teach her how to sew—and she became quite good at it. She begged me to let her stay with me in L.A., and soon after her arrival she secured herself an interview at Paramount Studios, landing a job as a costume designer.

Her stay with me was short-lived, as she was able to save enough money to move into her own apartment within a month. But she and I made a pact that we’d never brush each other off or put the other to the side. She was the only family I had out here, and vice versa, even if we weren’t exactly family. So whenever I saw a lunch or dinner with Shanna in my schedule, I made sure I didn’t miss any of them.

When lunchtime came, I met her at Providence to enjoy some seafood. She met me at the door, and I hugged her. “There he is.”

“I made it. Today has been one hell of a day.” I took her hand, leading her inside.

In no time at all they had us seated, and our appetizer of oysters on the half-shell was brought to us along with some white wine. She rocked back in her seat as she swallowed one of the oysters then looked at me. “So, you disappeared on me. I thought you and I might go trick-or-treating last night, just like we did in the old days. I’d dress up as a witch and you’d throw a sheet over your head and cut out a couple of holes for your eyes.”

“Yeah, I did do a little dressing up. I wore a mask, anyway.” I sipped my wine then ate an oyster as she looked at me with narrowed eyes.

“A mask, huh?” She kept on eyeing me. “In Portland, no doubt.”

Shanna was one of the few who knew about my dabbling in the darker side of sex. And she absolutely hated it. So I was always a little leery of admitting to her when I’d gone. “Um, maybe.” I took another sip of wine.

“And you hooked up with a random sub?” she asked, but quickly raised her palm up to stop me from answering. “No, I’m not going to make you lie about it. I know you did pick up a little tramp and screw her mercilessly while spanking her until her ass …”

“Shanna, stop,” I hissed at her as I gestured around to the other patrons of the fine dining establishment. All conversations around us had gone silent as they honed in on what she was saying.

She looked around before lowering her voice as she leaned across our small table. “But you did find a girl. You can’t lie to me, Nixon Slaughter. I’ve known you for too damn long.”

“Okay, so I did find someone, and we had some fun. But my trips to Portland are a thing of the past.” I ate another oyster as she pondered what I’d said.

“Good. But what happened to make you decide not to go there anymore?” She eyed me again, scrutinizing my every word.

“The club I belong to has been destroyed,” I told her, then shrugged. “So I have nowhere to go now to get my fix.”

“Good,” she proclaimed as she picked up her glass and held it, as if to toast me. “The sinful place is no more, and you can stop that little bit of evil you’ve been doing and get to finding the right woman for you.”

“I’m not looking,” I said as our main courses—king salmon for her and vermillion rockfish for me—came to the table on a large round tray, carried by our helpful waiter.

“You’re not getting any younger, Nixon. Twenty-nine is barking at your door,” she reminded me.

So I reminded her of the same thing. “Neither are you, Shanna. And you’re only three months younger than me.”

The waiter left us, and she smiled at me. “Maybe it’s time we both started looking for people we can settle down with. Maybe then you’d stop yearning for a submissive on occasion.”

I looked down at my delicious meal, but the image wavered in front of me as Katana’s face filled my head. I didn’t think I’d ever stop yearning for at least one sub.

Chapter 8

Katana

The weeks after the best night of my life passed by quickly, and soon enough Thanksgiving was just a week away. Many people looked forward to Thanksgiving and the celebrations they’d have with their families, but not me. I hadn’t had a real Thanksgiving since I was eighteen. I’d had to leave the foster home after that, and I wasn’t gone a year before both the people who’d taken care of me had passed away.

The holidays always got me down. But this particular season was hitting me a lot harder than usual. I just didn’t feel well most of the time. I had a hard time waking up in the mornings, and I couldn’t make it through a day without taking a nap—a thing I’d never done.

I was just off. And my mind drifted to Nixon and that night way too often. It was like he was haunting me, and I didn’t have a clue as to how to stop it from happening.

One night, when I woke up after a three-hour nap that started at seven in the evening, I flipped on the TV as I knew there was no way I’d be falling back to sleep anytime soon.

After clicking through the channels, I found a romantic movie and sighed as I lay back on the sofa to watch it. It was all well and good until a steamy scene came on and I felt a surge in my lower regions. And whose handsome face had to pop into my mind once again? That’s right, Nix’s.

A moan escaped me as I closed my eyes and relived the feeling of his hands moving over my body. I stretched out and arched my back as I pretended his mouth was on my skin again.

My hand moved on its own to the soft hairs that topped my pussy. I left a bit on top but kept the rest cleanly shaven. I didn’t want to look like a little girl, but I also didn’t want to look like a Sasquatch down there, either.

Dipping my finger into my wetness, I pulled it up my slit then tapped my clit. In my mind, Nix’s mouth had found mine, and he gifted me with a gentle kiss. Our warm breaths mingled as he eased his mouth off mine and looked into my eyes. “Good little slave. Now your Master will satisfy your cravings for him.”

“Yes,” I moaned. “I’m yours, Master. Only yours.”

I imagined him taking my tit into his mouth, sucking on it softly. He was teasing me, not letting me have the harder sucking I craved. Light licks and gentle pulls were all he did. I grew antsy for more.

Pushing my hand under my T-shirt, my finger traced a circle around my nipple, pretending it was his tongue. “Oh, Master, it feels so good.”

I could hear his deep voice in my mind. “You make me feel so good, slave. My sexy little slave girl.”

In my mind I belonged to him. I had no desire to be with anyone else. And that thought made me inexplicably sad. I knew what I’d gotten myself into. I’d been told the rules of membership at that BDSM club. Essentially, I was nothing more than a body for some rich man to use for a while.

I stopped touching myself and sat up, sick to my stomach. Even as I hurried to the bathroom, afraid I would puke on the light tan carpet, I thought about what I’d eaten last. That morning I’d had two bites of a bagel with cream cheese. My stomach just didn’t agree with it, and I never found my appetite for the rest of the day.

When I got into the bathroom, I stepped on the scale as a series of burps popped out of my mouth. I’d lost five pounds in the last week.

I barely ate and slept all the damn time. Did I have mono?

After a couple of dry heaves, I left the bathroom to get my laptop to search the symptoms of mononucleosis. Fatigue was at the very top, but everything that followed that—high fever, body aches, headache, muscle weakness, sore throat, swollen glands in the neck and underarms, rash—I didn’t have.

Well, at least it wasn’t mono. At least it wasn’t something I could’ve contracted from my one beautiful night with Nix. I wouldn’t have wanted the memory of that night to be tarnished by anything negative, like me getting sick.

And I’d also really hate to have to call Nixon to let him know that he should get checked for the virus because of our night together. That would be uber-embarrassing.

I turned off the television and headed to my bedroom to finish watching the movie in there. Grabbing a bottle of water and a sleeve of saltines out of the cabinet, I brought the crackers with me to eat in bed. Not a thing that a person with a partner would get to do. I guess I was lucky.

I could eat in bed, sleep at odd hours, work when I felt like it. Many had it far worse than me. I wondered if depression had caused my problems. I knew a lot of people only got depressed during the holidays—maybe I’d become one of those people. The good Lord knew I didn’t have anything to be happy about this season. Nothing to look forward to.

As a matter of fact, one of my clients had asked me why in the world I had given her December 25^th as the date I’d deliver her cover to her. I’d told her that it was just another day for me. She’d told me that was sad, and I supposed it was.

With no family, days like Thanksgiving, Christmas, and even New Year’s meant little to me. Hell, even Halloween hardly registered on my radar—I hadn’t participated in that since I was a kid in foster care. My mother had never taken me out on Halloween from what I could remember. I also didn’t remember ever having a Christmas tree or anything else special when I lived with her. My birthday must’ve come and gone without me knowing it, up until I was put into the system.

My heart felt heavy as I lay in my bed, the television off. I didn’t feel like watching any romantic shit anymore. It settled in that I had to be depressed. Who the hell wouldn’t be, considering my past?

While my night with Nixon Slaughter had made something inside of me light, there was no one there to keep that flame going. It had started to dwindle into nothingness the moment we parted ways.

I’d been a damn fool to go to that club. Up until that night, I’d been just fine with how things were in my life. Yes, I did work myself too hard at times. Yes, sometimes I drank a bottle of wine all alone as I sat in bed and watched scary movies until I’d end up looking around my room, paranoid about what might sneak out to get me. But I’d been okay with that life.

Right?

I moaned as I got into bed, pulled the blanket up to my chin, and closed my eyes. They burned, and I felt dehydrated.

Sitting up, I chugged the water, praying I could just rehydrate and make everything okay again. I would put Nixon out of my head—refuse to let that memory enter my brain. I’d whack at it with everything I had each and every time he tried to come back to visit me in my imagination.

No more Nixon Slaughter!

Even though I’d slept some ten hours that day with all my naps, I found myself tired still. As I drifted closer to sleep, I began to think about one of the ideas my client had run by me.

Baily Sever routinely ordered book covers from me. She wrote young adult romance under a pen name, specializing in BDSM. When I’d told her about my little encounter with that world, she’d begged me to let her interview me. She’d pay me for my time, and better yet, she’d give me part of the royalties and tag me as a co-author.

I hadn’t taken her up on the offer yet but as I lay there and thought about what I’d been doing, falling down the rabbit hole, I decided I would take her up on that offer.

Getting back out of bed, I headed to the living room and my desk. Right then and there, I got on my laptop and sent her an email, telling her I wanted to take her up on her offer. She could call me as soon as she wanted to do the interview. Hell, I’d even make the cover of the book free of charge since she’d said she’d give me credit as the co-author.

The prospect of this new work had me feeling pretty peppy, and I headed to the kitchen to make me some eggs and bacon. Crazy how getting a new project started can get you up and going again.

I had to move on from that night. As spectacular as it had been, it was over. I had to get that through my head; I’d never have another night like that one. Not ever.

Chapter 9

Nixon

The month after Halloween both dragged on and flew by somehow. It was the day before Thanksgiving and Shanna and I were on my private jet, heading back to Texas to spend the holiday with our families.

Like every day before that one, my mind was on Katana, wondering what she’d be doing for Thanksgiving. Shana sat across the narrow aisle from me, filing her nails as we sped through the sky. “Why do you seem so zoned out, Nixon?”

I’d been laying my head on the headrest, eyes closed, picturing Katana in that hotel room. I turned my head to look at her. “I’m just wondering what Katana is doing tomorrow. And wishing like hell I’d gotten her number or at least her address so I could send her flowers or something.”

One blonde brow arched as she looked at me with an incredulous expression. “Why? Why would you still be thinking about that little brainless twit?”

I sat up, taking offense at what she’d said. “Hey, no reason to call her names, Shanna. And need I remind you that you don’t even know her? What grounds do you have for calling her anything at all?”

“I know all I need to know about the girl. She’s into some sick shit and can’t have a brain in her head if she’s into that stuff. Now, I can see a man being into that lifestyle. Of course, who wouldn’t get off at least a little bit, ruling over someone? But being the one who’s ruled over—well, that only means one thing in my book: no brains.” She put the nail file down and picked up a magazine, thumbing through the pages. “Put her out of your head, Nixon.”

Closing my eyes again, I tried not to think about Katana—but did anyway. Shanna was wrong about her. She wasn’t brainless. Sure, I didn’t know her that well—or at all really—but I knew she wasn’t dumb.

“You know who I bet will be in town, too, Nixon?” Shanna asked with a lilt to her voice.

“Nope,” I said without even opening my eyes.

“Bianca.”

My cock twitched. Bianca had been a couple of years older than me and often taunted me when we were kids. By the time we were in high school though, I’d caught her giving me sideways glances, admiring how I’d grown up.

I’d always had a crush on her—she was the hottest girl in school. Long legs, tanned skin, dark hair that hung to her waist. And then it hit me—Katana and Bianca had a lot of similarities. Maybe that was why I had felt so instantly attracted to Katana.

I sat up and looked at Shanna. “You really think she might be visiting her parents?” I had to admit I was a little excited about seeing her.

“Why wouldn’t she be there?” Shanna asked. “Everyone comes home for the holidays.”

I nodded and lay my head back again. I tried to picture Bianca. It’d been two years since I’d seen her last. That was at Christmas. She’d been with some guy then, but gave me a sexy little smile that told me she would’ve given me a bit of her time if she’d been alone. It was a smile she’d never given me before.

But as hard as I tried to bring Bianca’s face into my mind, I couldn’t. The only face I saw was Katana’s, and it was beautiful. So beautiful it made my heart ache.

I should’ve gotten her damn number!

When the jet stopped at the San Antonio International Airport, we hopped into a rental car and headed for Pettus. It took us a little over an hour to get home, and when we did, we were greeted with open arms by our families.

Just like we always did during the holidays, everyone ended up at the only café in town, the Dairy Queen. Shanna and I were sitting in a booth, catching up with a couple of guys I played football with in high school. They’d never left the tiny town, both working as guards at the nearby prison.

I hadn’t even noticed anyone coming into the place, but when a hand moved across my shoulders, I looked back to find Bianca. “Hey!”

“Hi,” she purred. Wearing a maroon jacket, her dark hair pulled up into a long ponytail, she looked just like she had back in high school. “When did you get here and how long are you staying, Nixon?”

“Today, and leaving the day after tomorrow,” I answered as she came around to stand at the end of the table.

The conversation at our table ceased as she ran her finger along my jaw. “I like the beard. It makes you look distinguished.”

I chuckled. “I was going for dangerous, but thanks.”

Her dark brown eyes cut to the side, looking out at the parking lot. “I was thinking about going to Charlie’s for a beer or two. Wanna take me?”

I sat perfectly still, unsure if I truly did want to take her. It was pretty easy to see she wanted me. And after all these years, that was a pleasant surprise.

Shanna jabbed me in the ribs as she whispered, “Are you crazy? Get the hell up and take her. I can walk home from here.”

There went my only excuse not to take Bianca to the bar.

The guys looked at me like I was insane for not jumping at the chance to be with one of the hottest chicks ever to grace our little hick town. But the fact was, I wasn’t jumping. And there was only one reason why.

Katana.

Before I could say a word, the bell on the door jingled, and this time I noticed it. When I looked to see who it was, a tall, decently built dude was heading our way. “Shit,” Bianca hissed. She walked toward him. “There you are. I was looking for you.”

He gave me a look before he looked back at her. “Come on.”

She glanced back at me and shrugged. “See you guys around.”

I’d missed my chance with her and knew it. I couldn’t say I actually cared, but Shanna seemed invested, as she waited until Bianca and her guy walked out before lighting into my ass. “Are you crazy, Nixon? You mooned over that girl all through junior high and high school. You said if she gave you half a chance you’d make her see God. Well, she just gave you a hell of lot more than half a damn chance. She was throwing herself at you, Bianca style.”

With a shake of my head, I said, “Did you not notice that she has a man, Shanna? Damn. I’m not about to get some redneck pissed off at me over a piece of ass.”

Plus, even before he walked in, I couldn’t seem to make myself get up and do it. Katana just kept flashing through my mind like a strobe light. I had to do something to get myself over the girl who obviously wanted nothing more to do with me. She had my number, and she had never called.

The fact was Katana had signed a paper that had had her promise not to contact any man she encountered at the club. But after Halloween, the Dungeon of Decorum was destroyed, destroying all that with it. Nothing could stop her from calling me if she wanted to. She wouldn’t be in trouble or get fined by the club.

So why didn’t she ever call?

The answer was simple. She didn’t want to.

Maybe I’d been too rough. Maybe I’d gone too far. Or maybe I hadn’t gone far enough or been rough enough. Who knew what the reason was.

Why should I care? I kept asking myself that question over and over again.

There wasn’t any reason for me to care why she hadn’t called.

As I sat there, sipping on my chocolate shake, a thought I’d never had before popped into my head. What if she had lost my card?

If I went back to Portland, I might be able to find her apartment building again. I had no idea what her address was, but I wasn’t opposed to knocking on every door until I found hers.

Suddenly I had a plan, a real plan to find her.

I got up, and Shanna looked at me in surprise. “Where’re you going now, Nixon?”

“Back to Mom and Dad’s. I know it’s noisy there and chaotic with all the nieces and nephews running around, but I need to visit them. You want a ride to your parents’ place?”

She got up to come with me. After shaking hands with my old friends and wishing them well, we left, and I dropped Shanna off. I couldn’t help but feel excited about what I’d be doing as soon as we got back to L.A., and my plan began to get more and more detailed as the night went on.

Thanksgiving Day

The next afternoon Dad and I sat in the backyard, watching all the kids play. He opened the Yeti ice chest I’d bought him just that morning when we went shopping. He’d filled it up with beer and took a couple out, tossing one to me.

I popped the top on it and took a nice long drink. The cold brew felt good going down my parched throat. Although it was the end of November, the temperature hovered around ninety that day—pretty hot for Thanksgiving. I didn’t miss the South Texas heat one tiny bit.

“So, how’s it going out west, son?” Dad asked me, then took a drink of his beer.

“Great.” I put the bottle of beer between my legs to hold it steady as a football sailed in my direction. Catching it, I tossed it back to my oldest nephew.

“Any girls you like out there?” Dad asked me.

“One,” I found myself saying. “But she’s playing hard to get.”

“You’re not used to that, are you, son?” He winked at me.

“Not at all. But I’ve got a plan now.” I smiled then took another drink.

Tomorrow I’d start that little plan, and soon I’d have that sexy vixen right where I wanted her.

Chapter 10

Katana

Thanksgiving Day

I had never felt worse than I did on Thanksgiving as I waited for my turkey pot pie to cook in the oven. Normally I’d just nuke the thing, but it being a holiday that was celebrated with turkey, I gave it a bit more love and put it in the oven.

An acrid taste had plagued my mouth for over an hour, so I gave up trying to use water to get rid of it and went to brush my teeth again. While in the restroom, I noticed the unopened box of birth control pills that were sitting on the vanity. I hadn’t taken any in weeks, since my stomach had been giving me fits. But something compelled me to pick up the box and look at it.

When I opened it, I began to count how many I’d taken out of it. There’d been fourteen pills I knew I hadn’t taken. And those were there. There were three missing, but before those three there was a week’s worth that I hadn’t taken.

My heart stopped. I’d forgotten to take my pills during that crazy week. The week right before I was with Nix.

I dropped to my knees, which had suddenly gone weak, and looked up. “Lord, please don’t let this be what I think it is.”

Shaking, I got up and went into my bedroom to grab my purse and car keys. The smell of the turkey pot pie had me going to turn the oven off before leaving the pie behind and going to go to the store.

As I drove around town, I found most places were closed for the holiday, but I did manage to find a convenience store and was lucky enough to find a pregnancy test.

When I took it to the checkout, the clerk scanned it then asked, “Congratulations?”

A shake of my head told her that was not the case. Not at all. I couldn’t speak—I thought I might just burst into tears if I tried. I quickly grabbed my purchase and went back home.

There were two sticks in the package, and I took one and headed to the bathroom. Once all set and ready to go, I found I couldn’t. I was dry as a bone.

Back I went to the kitchen to drink copious amounts of water. My stomach felt like it was floating in deep water, yet I still couldn’t pee. I guess my nerves had shut things down.

Digging through my purse, I found the business card Nixon had given me. I just stared at it for the longest time. “I’m so sorry, Nix. I didn’t do this on purpose.”

If I am pregnant, should I tell him about it?

Did he have to know? He’d made sure to ask me about birth control before we ever did a thing and I had told him I’d taken care of it. I hadn’t meant to lie about it—I thought I had been telling the truth.

That damn busy as hell week was to blame for this!

I sat at the kitchen table, my head in my hands as I stared at the card on the table, his name staring a hole in me. Nixon Slaughter, my baby’s father’s name.

I shook my head back and forth—I had to stop thinking like that. I couldn’t hold him accountable for this. I couldn’t do that to the man. He didn’t deserve that.

What did he deserve?

Did he deserve to know if he was going to be a father? Did he deserve the right to make his own decision about what part he wanted or didn’t want to play in his child’s life?

I knew the answer to those questions. I wasn’t without morals. I had never known my father. My mother had often said she had no idea who it was. Being a bastard child wasn’t a thing I’d want for my son or daughter.

But I was getting ahead of myself. I had to take the test before I could totally freak out—though I was pretty sure I already knew what the result would be.

I would tell Nix if the test came back positive. I wasn’t heartless. But I wouldn’t ask him for a thing. He could do for the child whatever he wanted. He could see it or not. Whatever he wanted.

All of this was my fault, and I’d carry the burden alone if I had to.

My phone rang, jerking me back to reality. Blyss’s name popped up on my screen, and I answered it, my voice shaky. “Hello, Blyss. Happy Thanksgiving.”

“You sound bad. What’s wrong, Katana?” She knew me better than most people did.

“Oh, nothing,” I lied. “How are the kids enjoying their yummy Thanksgiving dinner?”

“They hate it. No kid likes a meal that’s half vegetable-based sides. Troy made a homemade pepperoni pizza for them. He’s the best dad ever,” she gushed. “But enough about us, how about you? What are you doing to celebrate this day?”

God, I couldn’t tell her I was going to maybe eat a pot pie that came out of a box—and that was the best I could expect of my night at this point. I couldn’t tell her that it all depended on the results of the pregnancy test, because I knew I wouldn’t have an appetite if it was positive.

“Oh, not much,” I finally said. “Just working.”

“Please tell me you and a couple of friends went to eat somewhere. Please tell me you’re just coming in from a fun time and are now chilling because you’re so full,” she begged me.

Oh, how I wish I could tell her those things. “I wanted to stay in. I haven’t felt well in a couple of weeks. I think I have a bug or something,” I told her. That was the truth after all. I had thought that up until a short time ago.

“No one gets a bug for a few weeks,” she griped at me. “You need to go to the doctor as soon as possible. Is there a non-emergency care facility open near you today? You should go today if possible. That’s much too long to be sick, Katana.”

She might be right. I certainly would go see someone if the test came back negative—and I guess I’d be going to the doctor if it came back positive, too. “I’m not sure if there is anything open other than the emergency room at the hospital. I don’t think this constitutes an emergency. I don’t always feel bad. I’m tired all the time and have no appetite. I’ve made myself eat little bits here and there, but sometimes it comes back up.”

“Are you drinking water?” she asked. “Because you need to drink lots of it. Even if it just comes back up, you need to keep drinking it. And you said this has been going on for a couple of weeks?”

“Yes.” I didn’t want to tell her about it, but I’d lost five pounds in the week following Halloween, and I’d lost five more in last five days. My ribs were beginning to show, as were my hipbones.

Then she gave me some helpful advice. “You need to get those drinks that elderly people drink to keep their nutrients up.”

“Oh, I forgot about those things. My foster parents, Mr. and Mrs. Baker, used to drink those. I recall liking them when I tasted them once. I got in trouble for doing that, but at least I know I like them.” Sitting back, I put my hand on my stomach, as if I would even be able to feel a tiny little embryo at that point if I was preggo.

I wasn’t a kid. At twenty-four, I felt mature enough to have a child. Things would work great with my job, so I could stay home to raise him or her. There wasn’t much to fear. Except having to do it all alone.

Would Nix want to be there for the baby? Would he want to be there for me?

“You should go out and buy some of those right away. If you’ve been sick that long I bet you’re losing weight, aren’t you?” Blyss asked with a knowing tone in her voice.

“A little. I promise I’ll pick some up. And I’ll go to the doctor.” I would do that, one way or the other. If I was knocked up, then I’d have to, and if not, then I’d have to see what the hell was wrong with me. It couldn’t just be depression.

I wasn’t sure if I even had depression. The only thing I was kind of sad about was Nix. I missed him every single day. But I knew time would take care of that. I couldn’t be feeling this bad over missing him. Could I?

And if it was that, then what could I do about it? Call him?

I’d told him I wouldn’t be doing that. I’d signed a contract stating that I’d never try to contact anyone I encountered at the club.

But the club was no more, as were all the contracts in their system, right? And did the contract really matter if he wanted to hear from me too? He hadn’t seemed opposed to the idea when we’d parted ways.

I made a pact with myself—if I wasn’t pregnant, I’d go to the doctor. If they couldn’t find a thing wrong with me, I’d give Nix a call and see if he wanted to come for a visit. Maybe I’d test the relationship waters with him if I found out he missed me the way I had missed him.

There were so many variables though.

The urge to pee hit me suddenly, and I hurried to the bathroom. “Okay, Blyss, I’ll do everything you told me. I’ve gotta get off here now. Love you. Happy Thanksgiving. Bye.” I ended the call before she said a word as I was about to bust.

The three bottles of water all seemed to be ready to come out at the same time. The stream I let loose easily covered the little stick and I placed it on a washcloth next to the sink.

The next three minutes went by like three whole days. I covered my eyes the whole time until the timer on my cell went off, telling me I could look now.

Moving my fingers apart, I snuck a peek at the stick.

“Oh, shit!”

Chapter 11

Nixon

The day after Thanksgiving Shanna and I left early to get back to the L.A. grind. Only I wasn’t going to be staying in L.A long, or going home at all. No, I was going to Portland to search for Katana Reeves.

Shanna and I lived miles apart, so she took a cab back to her place, and I acted as if I was waiting for my driver to come pick me up. I wasn’t; I’d already told the pilot to take an hour off, then I’d be ready to head to Portland.

Chilling in one of the lounges at LAX, I was sipping on some Scotch. At only a bit past noon, I knew it was a bit on the early side to be drinking alcohol, but my nerves had been stirred up. I had to do something to soothe them.

My cell beeped, letting me know a text had come in. I didn’t recognize the number but opened the message anyway.

Nix, it’s Katana Reeves, from Portland. I don’t know if you remember me at all, but I need to talk to you. Can you call me when you get a chance?

Why would she think I wouldn’t remember her? Shit, it hadn’t been a month since we’d been together. I wasted no time calling her. Her voice was soft as she answered. “Nix?”

“Yeah, it’s me. How’ve you been?” I ran my finger around the top of my glass, picturing her lovely face in my mind.

“Okay. And you?”

“Same. It’s funny you sent me that message. I grew tired of waiting for you to call, so I’m sitting at the airport right now, waiting for my pilot to finish his break so he can take me your way,” I told her and hoped she was going to be cool with that.

“Really?” she asked, sounding as if she didn’t quite believe that.

I held up the phone and asked the bartender. “Hey, buddy, can you verify where I am right now?”

“LAX,” he said without hesitation.

“See,” I said. “I just got back from visiting my family in Texas, and all I could think about was getting to Portland to find you.”

She let out a heavy sigh, as if she were holding her breath. “That’s good to know. I’ve got a lot to talk to you about. When do you think you’ll get here?” she asked and I heard her voice crack a little.

“A couple of hours. I’ll be at the Heathman. I can send someone to get you and bring you over.” I took another drink and waited to see what she’d say.

“I can’t do what we did before,” she mumbled.

My heart fell. I definitely wanted to do what we’d done before. But I didn’t ask why. “Okay. That’s fine. I just want to see you.” I also wanted to find out what had taken her so damn long to contact me. “If I’d had the forethought to get your number, I’d have called you a long time ago. That was my mistake.” I hesitated then went for it, “I’ve missed you, Katana.”

“I’ve missed you, too,” she said, and it made me sigh. She’d missed me! “To be honest, I’ve thought about calling you often. The contract had me holding back. But then I finally realized only yesterday that the contract probably doesn’t matter now that the club is closed It’s nice to hear that you missed me.”

I saw my pilot walking past the lounge toward the gate he’d parked the jet at. “Hey, I see my pilot. I’m going to see if we can take off now. I’ll call you as soon as I get there.”

“K, bye,” she said, then hung up.

I hurried to catch up to Bernie, the pilot. “Hey, Bernie, wait up.”

He stopped and turned to look at me. “Yes, sir.”

I caught up with him. “Are you doing anything? I mean, I’m ready to take off if you don’t have anything else to do.”

“No, we can go. The plane’s been fueled up. Can I ask how long we’ll be in Portland, sir? My wife is wondering how long I’ll be gone this time.”

“You can come right back if you want. I can just call you when I’m ready to come back. It’s not like it’s that far.” I clapped him on the back, and we started walking to the jet. “How long have you been married?”

“Ten years,” he said. “We’ve got three kids.”

“Kids, wow.” I shook my head. “I’ve never even thought about having kids. My sisters and brothers all do. I come from an enormous family. Mom and Dad had six of us. I’m the oldest and I’ve just never found anyone I’ve wanted to settle down with. Tell me how you knew your wife was the one for you, Bernie.”

“She and I clicked right from the beginning. I mean, we had a small stretch of time there where it was a little awkward, but we fell into step with each other pretty quickly. And I’d never felt about anyone else the way I felt about her. For me, it was a no-brainer. Married that girl as fast as I could.”

We stepped onto the plane, and I went to my seat while he went to the cockpit. “Thanks, Bernie.”

“You sweet on someone, sir?” he asked me then winked at me. “Maybe someone in Portland?”

“Maybe,” I said with a chuckle. “And Bernie, do me a huge favor and stop calling me sir. Hell, you’re older than I am. It’s Nixon, okay?”

“Copy that, Nixon. Buckle up now.”

I napped all the way to Portland. Just knowing I’d get to see Katana allowed me to have one of the calmest sleeps I’d had in a month. It wasn’t until I relaxed back in that seat that I realized how pent up I’d actually been.

When I got off the plane, I called Katana to let her know that I’d landed and was hiring a car to pick her up. But she told me she’d drive her own car over to meet me. I just needed to let her know when I had a room, and she’d come.

The fact that she didn’t want to be without her car had me a little on edge. But then again, I couldn’t expect her to be at my beck and call just because I was in town.

Once I’d gotten all checked in and up to my room, I called her, and she said she was heading my way. As I waited, I began to get nervous and thoughts crept into my head that I hadn’t considered in my excitement. What in the hell could she possibly want to talk about?

I mean, I knew what I wanted, and that was another go at her. But I didn’t necessarily have anything I wanted to discuss with her. She had said we couldn’t do what we did last time, and that we needed to talk. So what could it be about?

Had she caught an STD and wanted to blame me?

I knew I was clean. Or maybe now I wasn’t.

Shit!

A knock came at the door, and I walked over to open it, unsure how I’d react to seeing her with my current thoughts clouding my mind.

But when I saw her again, my mind went quiet, and my heart sped up.

Wearing some jeans and a light sweater with a pair of black flats, Katana stood there, looking at me. Her blue eyes ran up and down me. I’d worn jeans and a T-shirt and had kicked off my shoes as soon as had I gotten into the room.

We just stood there, our eyes feasting on each other, until a flurry of movement broke the stillness. I grabbed her, pulling her inside and straight into my arms. Pinning her to the door, my mouth crashed down on hers, and I couldn’t get enough of her.

Clothes ripped as we pulled them off each other, and before either of us knew what the hell was happening, we were both naked. She wrapped her legs around my waist, and I plowed into her soft, hot cunt as we groaned with relief.

I fucked her hard, using the wall to hold her up for me just where I needed her. We both came in a heated rush, and then I carried her like that, with her legs still wrapped around me, to the bed.

Laying her down, I let our bodies part for only a moment before I was on top of her, my cock growing hard already. I pushed myself back into her, thrusting with a force that seemed inhuman. We looked into each other’s eyes as I stabbed my dick into her still pussy, which was still pulsing from the orgasm I’d just given her.

Her hands moved through my hair and then over my beard. “That looks good on you, Nix.”

I kissed her sweet lips then moved my mouth over to kiss her neck, my thrusts finally slowing to a less urgent pace. Her body arched to meet mine, and we moved as one until both of us were shaking with another orgasm. We’d come together once more. Seemed we had a connection that not even our bodies could deny.

There wouldn’t be any more walking away from her and expecting nothing more. I had to have more of her. And it sure did seem like she had to have more of me, too.

She’d told me there’d be none of this. So I wondered what made her change her mind. But I’d ask that later. For now, I wanted to flip her over and spank her sweet ass while I took her from behind. But when I grabbed her by the waist, it became clear she wasn’t going to let me do that.

It also became clear that she’d lost some weight. I felt the bones of her hips, and when I ran my hands up her sides, I felt her ribs. I hadn’t taken time to notice anything; I’d wanted her too badly.

Her hands caught my wrists. “I have to tell you something, Nix.”

The way her lips began to quiver told me it wasn’t anything good. Was she sick? Dying?

“Tell me,” I whispered as I stayed right where I was, my dick still inside of her. I didn’t want to lose the connection. I couldn’t lose it.

“Nix, I’m pregnant with your baby.”

Shit!

* * *

Chapter 12

Katana

Silence filled the room. Nix stared at me for a long time then rolled off me and hurried to the bathroom without saying a word. Without a clue as to what he thought about the baby, I lay there and started crying, pulling the blanket up to cover my body.

I’d had no idea how he would take the news. I didn’t know if there was any right way he could have reacted that would’ve made me happy. But this reaction definitely didn’t make me happy.

A few minutes later he came out of the bathroom, a wet washcloth in his hand. He didn’t look at me as he ran it over his face and came to sit on the edge of the bed. “Are you positive it’s mine? I know you told me that it had been over a year since you’d had sex, but people lie. So I need to know the truth.” He looked directly into my eyes. “It’s okay if you lied to me. What’s important now is that you and I both know the truth about everything. If there’s the slightest chance it’s not mine, I need to know. Did you sleep with anyone after me?”

I shook my head and wiped my tears away. “I told you the truth before about not having sex for over a year. And I haven’t had sex with anyone else. I’ve been sick. I thought I had a bug. But yesterday I took a look at my birth control pills. I hadn’t taken them in a couple of weeks, since I first started feeling sick to my stomach. I saw that I’d skipped the week before I met you. I didn’t do it on purpose; I swear that to you.”

He nodded. “I believe you. I recall you telling me you’d had a rough week. It must’ve been one hell of a week.”

“It was. But I can’t believe I forgot to take so many pills. I’m so sorry.” I began to sob and covered my face with my hands so he couldn’t see me ugly crying.

I felt his hands move over mine and he pulled them away, grabbing me up and hugging me, swaying back and forth. “Don’t cry. We’ll handle this. I’m so glad you told me right away. I’m so glad you didn’t leave me out of this.”

He was glad I hadn’t left him out. That was so good to hear. The truth was I’d been worried he’d be mad at me and tell me the problem was all mine since I had caused it.

But he hadn’t said that. He was holding me and telling me we’d handle things. Things were turning out better than I’d thought they would. But I knew I had to pull myself together so I could let him know a bit more.

Sniffling, I pulled back and looked at him. He took the damp cloth and wiped my tears away. “Nix, I just want you to know that I’m not going to hold you to anything. You can have as much or as little to do with this baby as you want. I can take care of him all on my own if you want nothing to do with it. I’m not trying to trap you into a relationship with me either.”

“I’m sure you’re not,” he whispered. “You’ve only known about the baby for a day. You’re sure you want to keep it?”

I nodded. “It may seem like I haven’t thought it all out. But I can’t kill a baby. No matter how small it is. No matter if it hasn’t developed its tiny little heart yet. I can’t do it.” I looked him right in the eyes. “I won’t do it.”

He smiled. “Good. I’m glad to hear that. We got pregnant for a reason. God doesn’t make mistakes.”

He’d used the word we. We’d gotten pregnant. I wasn’t in this alone. He was right here with me. For the first time in my life, I had someone who was going to stick with me.

I sighed. “You don’t know how good it is to hear that, Nix. I promise you I won’t bother you about anything. We’ll figure it all out, and things will be okay.”

“Sure they will,” he said then kissed the top of my head. “Now I understand why you said we couldn’t do what we did before. I have to tell you I was pretty disappointed when you told me that. But now I get it. And I want to tell you that makes me feel very good about the kind of mother you’ll be. A pretty damn great one, I expect.”

I laughed a little. “I guess you should know some things about me, Nix. My mother never knew who my father was. She left me alone a lot and one day she just didn’t come home at all. I was taken to an orphanage, and later an elderly couple took me into their home and fostered me until I turned eighteen.”

“Damn,” he muttered. “That’s rough.”

“I think I should take some parenting classes. It’s not like I know how to care for a baby, or a child for that matter.” I looked down, feeling pretty pathetic.

His hand on my chin brought my face up, and he kissed my lips before he said, “My mother had six kids. I think she’d love to teach you about babies and raising kids.”

His mother?

“You’d take me to meet your family?” I asked with surprise.

“Of course. You’re having my baby. You have to meet the people who’ll love him almost as much as we will.” He kissed me again.

This was all going too perfectly. It didn’t make sense. Things never went perfectly in my world. Something would eventually happen to fuck it all up. But for now, things were going well, and I could enjoy the moment.

When our lips parted, he had more great things to tell me. “I know this is sudden. I mean, we’ve been hit with a lot. But you’re not in this alone. And I want to be there for you just as much as the baby. Come to Malibu. Live in my home. I’m not rushing a relationship or anything like that, so don’t get scared off by what I’m saying here.”

“You aren’t?” I asked. “I mean, I don’t want to force anything either. Do you have enough room for me to have my own bedroom, so we’re not moving things too fast?”

“I’ve got four bedrooms. You’ll have one, and the baby will have one, and we’ll still have one for guests. All of the bedrooms have their own bathrooms so we won’t be getting in each other’s way.” He kissed my cheek. “I mean it. I want to be a part of this whole thing, the pregnancy too. I don’t want to miss a single thing where this child is concerned.”

I was grateful to hear how optimistic he was about this whole thing. But I didn’t want to become a burden to him. “I’ll pay half the rent and all the other bills.”

“Like hell, you will.” He got underneath the blanket with me and put his arm around me. “What is it you do for a living, anyway?”

“I design book covers. I’m a freelancer. I can work from home. I’ll never have to leave the baby with a sitter to do my job.” I smiled. The flexibility of my job made me happy. With all the worries I had about having this child, knowing that I wouldn’t have to find a babysitter was a great relief.

“Cool. Not that you’ll have to work. I’ve got more than enough money. But if you want to do it to keep yourself busy, go right ahead.” He gave my shoulders a little squeeze.

“I won’t be able to be your little slave for quite some time. Are you going to be okay with that, Nix?” I asked, as I had no idea what he’d want.

He chuckled. “Yeah, I know. It’s okay. I only get that urge a couple of times a year anyway. It’s not my full-time thing.”

Glad to have heard that, I laid my head on his chest and felt safe in his arms. I’d never felt as safe as I did when he held me. I had a father for my child. A man who wanted to be there for me and our baby.

I couldn’t believe that a chance meeting at a BDSM club had ended up like this.

With me pregnant with a wealthy man’s child, being swept off to Malibu, California, to live for who knew how long. The future looked a hell of a lot brighter than it ever had before.

But that niggling thing inside of me that hated to get my hopes up about anything came to pester me. Things never go right for you, Katana Reeves, you know that. Something will rear its ugly head and make this thing go south. Just you watch.

I pressed my lips against Nix’s chest and tried to silence the nagging voice in my head. For now, everything was going right. For now, I had a man who was going to stand up and do the right thing. This hadn’t been planned, but it had happened, and he’d had the level-headedness to deal with that.

For now, I would be okay.

Chapter 13

Nixon

Katana slept like a baby in my arms the rest of the night. I suppose finally having someone there for her might have had something to do with that. I had no idea what it felt like to be all alone in the world. It must feel terrible. That’s not a thing I would wish on anyone.

I found it hard to believe a woman as beautiful as she could be so alone in this world. Whatever her past held, her future was bright. She’d never be alone again now that she carried our child. And no matter what, I’d never turn my back on her. But I had no idea how much of my heart I’d be able to give her.

It wouldn’t be fair to her to ask her to marry me after knowing each other such a short amount of time. I didn’t believe in divorce—that’s just the way I was raised. My parents had been married a long time and taught us all that when you married someone, you stuck with them through thick and thin.

Mom and Dad didn’t let any of us in on their bad times, but we knew they had them. Things would get a bit tense in our household and words were barely spoken between them at times, but before we knew it, they’d managed to work things out behind closed doors. Mom always told us it was important for a mother and father to put their marriage above everything else. Treat it the same way you’d treat a business partnership at a highly profitable company.

I didn’t really understand why she’d say such a thing when I was younger. I mean, shouldn’t a couple always put their kids first?

But I’d overheard Mom explaining her ideology to my sister just before she got married. Mom had told her that the marriage was the foundation for the family that would soon follow. Without a firm foundation, everything would crumble. Each and every part of the family was important, and everyone had their part in it. But without a solid marriage, things could fall apart.

I couldn’t make a solid marriage with Katana at this point. It wouldn’t be fair to either of us or the baby. But I could be kind, and I could be there for her. I knew she blamed herself for the pregnancy; she’d told me as much. But I wanted desperately to take that burden off her narrow shoulders.

Then and there, I made a pact with myself to always let Katana know I was over the moon about having a baby. Because that was the truth. I’d never contemplated having a child. Not even once. But I believed that was only because I hadn’t found the right woman for me—that was another strong belief that my parents had instilled in me.

With Katana already pregnant, accident or not, I had no choice. I was going to be a father, end of subject. Why fight it? Why not enjoy it?

My parents wouldn’t be too thrilled with me at first, but they’d come around. They adored every one of their grandchildren, and they’d adore mine too, even if they didn’t agree with Katana and me not being married.

As I held her in my arms and breathed in the sweet scent of her lavender shampoo, I wondered how we’d end up getting along. Would she be okay with us being more like friends and co-parents rather than a couple? Because that’s how I imagined this turning out.

Even as that thought went through my mind, I felt her snuggling into me, letting out a sigh as she did. My heart pumped a bit harder—it made me feel good to make her feel good. She felt safe, I could tell. I could keep her safe. I could keep her mind free from worry about most things. With my money, resources, and family, there was a lot I could make happen for her, and I could do that for the rest of her life.

What I couldn’t do was tell her I loved her. I didn’t, and I wouldn’t lie to her about that. And I hoped she’d never lie to me about that either.

Katana was no gold digger—at least she didn’t seem to be. But that was neither here nor there. She carried my child; I’d always make sure she had more than enough to take care of the child for the rest of her life. She’d kind of hit the lottery when my seed took hold inside of her.

Another thought hit me, and this one knocked me back a bit. What if I fell in love with her, but she never fell in love with me? What if she met some man someday that she did fall in love with and wanted to marry? Where would that leave me?

A deep sigh came out of me, realizing how rough things could get in the future. The future was uncertain. All I could do was my best. Suddenly I felt the tremendous weight of responsibility resting on my shoulders.

A father to a child, a co-parent with a woman who had no one else in the world, and the responsibility to make sure no one got lost or left out of our little family.

I was going to have a family of my own!

It might not have happened in the way I’d imagined it happening someday, but I was about to have my own family. My father had taught us all that the man of the house had more responsibility to the family than anyone else did.

I kind of hoped that wasn’t true. I liked to think both parents carried that responsibility together. And for the most part, from what I had seen in other’s marriages, that proved to be true. But then, I’d had few up close and personal experiences with marriages.

When my sister had had her first baby with her husband a couple of years after they married, I was there. Things were going fine. She and her husband were working together to keep her calm and breathing through the painful contractions. A real team.

Everyone had come up to the hospital to welcome the first of our expanding family. Taking turns visiting the expecting couple, some of us had waited in the waiting room while others spent some time in the room with them. I happened to be in the room with them when the shit hit the fan.

Some alarm went off while she was having a contraction and suddenly two nurses were coming through the door in a rush. My sister held her husband’s hand, and both looked nervous. I had no idea what was happening.

“We have to get her to the OR right now,” one of the nurses said.

“Wait, why?” my brother-in-law asked. “What’s going on?”

The nurse, who was busily taking IV bags off the stand and placing them on the bed, answered him. “That alarm is letting us know the baby’s heart has stopped beating. We’ll have to do an emergency C-section.” She pressed the call button on the bed, and another nurse asked what she needed. “Get the OR ready and get the doctor and everyone else in there now,” she told her.

My sister began to cry. “What’s going to happen?” she asked the room in general.

The nurse nearest to her patted her on the arm. “You’ll be put under, and we’ll get the baby out and see what we can do about getting its heart going again.” She looked at my brother-in-law. “Daddy, can you help keep Mommy calm until we put her under? And you’ll need to throw on some scrubs—they’re in the room just before we get to the operating room. You’ll need to hurry. You’ll have decisions to make once the baby is delivered. Decisions your wife won’t be able to make, as she’ll be asleep.”

His face paled, and he nodded. But the color quickly rushed back to his face, and he looked at his wife with a strength he hadn’t had before. “I love you. I’ve got this. I’ve got you, and I’ve got our son. You have nothing to worry about. You can count on me.” He looked at me, frozen in my place with shock and worry. “Nixon, I need you to go out and inform the family about what’s happening. Tell them I will come out and let you all know how things are going as soon as we have everything under control.”

“I love you, sis,” I managed to say, and then I hurried out of the room.

In that moment, I’d seen the transfer of energy. I’d seen what a wife looked like when put into a situation where she was completely helpless, and I’d seen the weight of responsibility come to rest on the husband’s shoulders.

Later, after the baby was born, and after they’d discovered that the umbilical cord had prolapsed and been pinched by the baby’s head, causing the heart to stop beating, my brother-in-law had come out.

“He’s fine. And so is she. It was scary, but I don’t want any of you to worry. I’ll take good care of my wife and son,” he said.

My mother went to hug him, and she started to cry. “You’re a great man. Our daughter is lucky to have you.”

We’d all nodded, and everyone had gained a lot of respect for the man our sister had married. And after witnessing similar scenes with the rest of my family, I knew the possible obstacles that could come my way with a baby and a woman to take care of. A heaping load of responsibility.

Daunting, yes, but completely doable.

I kissed the top of Katana’s head, closing my eyes and trying to stop thinking about everything so I could fall asleep.

My future had been changed forever, and I could rest well knowing that I’d been brought up right and could handle all I’d just been given.

Chapter 14

Katana

After finally getting a good night’s sleep, I woke up feeling refreshed and better than I had in a very long time. I heard noise coming from the bathroom and knew Nixon had gotten up before me. When I sat up and stretched, I saw something hanging on the hook on the closet door, and saw a brand-new pair of black flats sitting at the bottom of a garment bag.

A smile curled my lips, realizing Nix had already had something sent up for me to wear since my clothes had been pretty much destroyed. He really knew how to take care of a girl. I had to count myself lucky that I’d gotten myself knocked up by him and not some low-life.

The bathroom door opened and steam poured out of it, shrouding a hulking figure. Nixon stood there with a towel wrapped around his waist as he used another one to dry his hair, rubbing his head. “Hey, pretty lady. Glad to see you up. Wanna go grab some breakfast?” He jerked his head toward the garment bag. “I got you something to wear.”

Climbing out of bed, I took the sheet with me to wrap around myself. The weight loss had me feeling self-conscious about my thin body. “I’ll get showered and dressed so we can head out.”

He stepped out of my way but reached out to me, grabbing the top of the sheet. “Why are you hiding behind that?”

Ducking my head, I mumbled, “I’m not hiding.”

He let the sheet go and took me by the chin. “You’re not happy with your weight, are you?”

I shook my head. “Not really.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll make sure you’re well taken care of now. We’ll find a doctor in Los Angeles to help you feel better.” He kissed my forehead. “I’ve got you. Don’t worry about a thing.”

“I already feel a lot better,” I admitted, looking into his green eyes. “Your support means the world to me. I know this wasn’t planned …”

He put his finger to my lips. “Hush. I want you to know something. It doesn’t matter that this wasn’t planned. I’m over the moon about this baby, and I can’t thank you enough for making this all so easy.”

I couldn’t believe what I heard coming out of his mouth. He was over the moon? “You’re a surprising man, Nixon Slaughter. It’s been less than a day since you found out about this baby, and already you’re stepping up to the plate much faster than I’d ever thought possible.”

“Yeah, well, what’s done is done. Why fight it? Might as well enjoy this as much as a real couple would, right?” he asked, then walked away from me.

“That’s a great attitude to have,” I said as I went into the bathroom.

As great as his attitude was, what he’d said hit me harder than it should have. Maybe it was the hormones, I couldn’t tell, but I felt tears welling up in my eyes, and they fell down my cheeks.

We weren’t a couple. We were hardly more than strangers. And we had been pushed together by this pregnancy. How’d I ever gotten myself into such an awkward situation?

How would a child fare with parents who didn’t even love one another?

I stepped into the shower, letting the water wash my tears away. My hands trembled as I moved them over my flat stomach. There was something growing inside of me, a tiny human that would grow bigger and bigger with each passing day. And the father and I barely knew one another.

Trying my best to pull myself together, I tried to stop thinking such thoughts and concentrate on the fact that I had someone who’d be by my side through all of this. Granted, I had no real idea how helpful Nixon would prove to be, but what he’d said told me he’d be great. Having him would be a hell of a lot better than doing this all on my own.

A knock on the door jolted me out of my internal thoughts. “Hey, if you don’t feel up to going out, I can order room service. It’s all up to you.”

“If you want to order in then you can do that,” I called out, and then finished rinsing my hair.

He opened the door and stepped inside. “I want you to decide, Katana.”

“It doesn’t matter to me.” I moved back a bit, hoping the water hitting the clear glass shower door would distort my image somewhat. My hipbones jutted out, and I hated the way they looked.

“Pick,” he said, undeterred by my lack of an answer. “There’s a breakfast buffet going on in one of the cafés downstairs. Doesn’t that sound good?”

I could see he wasn’t going to make the decision so I made one. “Yeah, let’s do that. I’m getting out now.”