I told him I wouldn't forget him and it was true. But probably not a wise thing to say. It was too much, too soon, but we wouldn't have anything else. I couldn't wait for a future moment because we didn't have one. This was it. He hadn't said it back to me, but I'd seen the look in his eyes when I'd said it. It had been enough.

It had taken all of my self-control not to succumb to the tears welling up in my eyes as Reed and I came. The finality of the moment hit me and I was thankful Reed wasn't looking at me. By the time he raised his head, I'd gotten my emotions under control.

He rolled us over and, as he slipped out of me, I felt a pang of loss. I wondered if it would feel the same when I slept with my husband. Would I wish he was still inside me or would I be grateful that he was done? Reed pulled me back against him, wrapping his body around mine. I snuggled back against him, grateful that I had asked for the whole night.

“Are you okay?” Reed asked, his voice low.

I nodded, not trusting my voice to speak.

“Get some sleep.” He kissed my temple. “I'll be here when you wake up.”

I pulled his arms more tightly around me. I didn't think I could to sleep, but I had no problem lying here in his arms while he slept. I'd never shared a bed with someone, not even by accident. Tomas and Kai had been diligent about me never falling asleep when Aaron and I hung out. The night we'd slept together, I'd left almost immediately after it was over.

Now, with Reed's arms around me, I knew what I'd been missing. Warmth. Safety. I felt his heart beating against my back, the slow rise and fall of his chest. The faint stubble on his cheeks was rough as he tucked his chin against me. I could feel his cock against my ass, soft and still slick with the results of our union. The logical part of me said we should clean up, but I was content where I was and didn't want to go anywhere.

The last thought was sleepy and I was surprised to feel my eyelids starting to fall. I'd rest them, I decided. It wasn't like I could see Reed anyway. It was more about feeling him. I was still concentrating on the various places our bodies touched when I finally slipped under.

I didn't know how long I slept, only that morning light was peeking between the curtains. It was still early though and, like he'd promised, Reed was still there. He'd shifted at some point during the night. We both had. He was on his back and I was laying half on his chest, one of his arms wrapped around me, his other hand on his stomach. The sheet was low on his waist, barely hiding what I knew was underneath.

I looked up at him, enjoying the chance to see him in a new way. He looked much younger asleep, closer to my age than to thirty. His face was relaxed, with none of the worry I'd seen. Even when he'd been laughing or we'd been in bed, there had still been little lines on his face. Based on what he'd told me about the stress he'd been under back in the States, I supposed it wasn't surprising. Now, however, all of that was gone.

I shifted slowly, not wanting to wake him, but needing to see him better. His hand slid down my back, coming to rest just above my ass, but he didn't wake up. I reached out, hesitating with my hand just above his face. I traced his lips with the lightest of touches, letting my fingers memorize their shape and feel. I could feel them now, the ghost of them on my mouth, between my legs, on my body.

Heat pooled in my stomach. I wanted him again. I wished I had more time. That I could take him in my mouth while he was still soft, feel him grow and swell as I licked and sucked the soft flesh. I hadn't gone down on Aaron that night. Reed was the only man I'd taken in my mouth and the memory of his taste was still thick on my tongue.

Before Reed, I'd never imagined I'd want to do something like that, but I'd loved the sounds he'd made, the way I felt. I loved that I could make him come apart, the look in his eyes when I'd swallowed every drop. I hadn't known what I was doing, but I didn't doubt I'd done well.

I was surprised at how easily sex had come to me. Things had been awkward with Aaron, but he'd assured me that first times were always like that. I wasn't sure that the difference between the first and second time was that drastic with everyone, but there hadn't been any awkwardness with Reed. It had felt natural, right. My body had moved with his in a way it hadn't with Aaron, and I didn't think it was simply because I'd done it once before.

His hair fell across his forehead and I gently pushed it back. I smiled at the mess it was. I could almost imagine him struggling with it before going in to work, trying to get it to lie flat. I wondered if it ever did, but as much as I tried, I couldn't quite picture him with neatly combed hair. In a suit, yes, but not looking like the hundreds of other businessmen I'd seen. My smile widened. It didn't matter what he wore or how he looked. Reed could never be like anyone else.

A lump rose in my throat and my eyes pricked with tears. I couldn't put it off any longer. I eased out from under his arm. I'd promised Tomas and Kai that I would leave with them, and I meant to keep my word. I wouldn’t give them any excuse to burst back in. Reed and I'd had our perfect night together and I would keep that memory safe, untainted by a confrontation.

I climbed off of the bed as carefully as I could. I didn't want to say good-bye. Mostly because I didn't know how to do it. We'd already done the awkward one-night stand good-bye, but this time it was different. He meant more to me than just a single night. But I didn't know what that actually meant. I couldn't tell him that I hoped we'd see each other again, because that could never happen. If he woke up, I wouldn't know what to say.

And I couldn't say for certain that I'd have the strength to leave him if he did. One kiss, even a kiss good-bye, and I couldn't guarantee I'd be able to walk away. I didn't think clearly when I was with him, when he was touching me. The very fact that I was here was evidence to that. Before I'd met him, my rebellions had been little ones. I would never have dreamed of spending a day in Venice without my bodyguards, but he emboldened me, made me act more impulsively than I ever had before. Even my rebellions had been planned out.

I gathered up my clothes from where I'd left them and headed into the bathroom. I didn't take a shower, not wanting to waste the time or risk Reed waking. I cleaned up as quickly and as best I could, then dressed again. I scowled as I pulled on the clothes I'd worn yesterday. I hated the feel of them, but I didn't have any other options. At least one good thing would come out of having to go straight to the plane and home. No one would think it weird I wanted to shower, put on some clean clothes and sleep.

How different this would be if I'd just been some girl he'd met in Paris. Someone with a normal family.

I shook my head and splashed cold water on my face. I couldn't think of that now. The time for flights of fancy and daydreams had passed. It was time to move on, to do my duty. I knew what it would mean and what was expected of me. I’d been raised for this. Born for this.

I took a steadying breath and walked back into the bedroom. I'd half expected Reed to be awake, but he was where I'd left him. More or less. He was on his side now, but he still appeared to be asleep. That was good. I didn't want him awake, but I also didn't want to leave without something to say good-bye. Reed deserved better than that.

On the desk was a sheaf of paper and a pen. A note would have to do. I stood there for a moment, wondering what to write. The words came more easily than I'd thought and it didn't take me long to get them all down. I folded the note and turned towards the bed. I set it on the end table and let myself have one final look at Reed. I leaned down and brushed my lips across his forehead. I couldn't stop the tear that trailed down my cheek, but I hurried out of the room before others could follow.

I'd wanted the time with Reed so I'd always remember him, but as I left the bedroom, I knew I couldn't hope for Reed to do the same. He needed to forget me. And that's what I'd told him.

My note had been simple.

Thank you for giving me what I needed. I can move on with my life now. I wish you all the happiness in the world.

And I did wish him that. I just wished that he could've been happy with me.