Chapter 4

In the time that had passed since I found freedom, I had thought often of Kypher. This was despite the pain that he had brought me—the long days and even longer nights in which I had been a slave to my Ak-hal mate and his whims. It wasn’t that I had ever wanted to see him again, or that I desired him. A part of me still could remember those early days of the mating when I had seen him as my savior—as a beautiful, alien creature that had rescued me from a life of drudgery back on Earth.

Though the reality would hit me hard later, it was impossible not to regret my naiveté. Perhaps, if I had been better prepared for what was to come, I could have escaped the many, many years of hardship that would follow. At least, that was what I often told myself.

As Kypher flew with me over the stretches of ice on Aman, it occurred to me that I hadn’t changed much at all—not since I was first brought to the planet, and not since I was freed. I had still allowed him to take me without even attempting to fight. But other things had changed. The ruins of the castle scarred the landscape as a harsh reminder of what I had been through, and I gazed at it as we passed by, remembering all those long years spent under Kypher’s harsh hand. And soon, I could see other objects in the distance—the new home of the Ak-hal where they had rebuilt their civilization.

Kypher settled down on the ice, and I stumbled down beside him, trying to get my bearings. I watched as he transformed back into the shape that I knew so well—the shape that still haunted my memories even after the long years that I had been away from him.

“Finally, I have you back where you belong, Clara,” he said, approaching me and gripping my chin in his strong hands, pulling it up so that my eyes met the flaming wheels of his own blazing gaze. My heart thudded in my chest, so hard and fast that I felt dizzy as I stood there. Instinctually, I tried to turn my head away, but he was too strong and I was helpless to do anything but stand there as he held onto me, reaching out and taking me by the hand. “You should have come with me when you had the chance. Why go with those savages?”

As if it were impossible for him to understand. I finally managed to break myself free from his grip and took a hesitant step back. “They’ll come for me,” I said. “They won’t let you and the other Ak-hal keep me prisoner here.”

“Prisoner?” His voice was tinged with disbelief, as if he really couldn’t understand what it was that I was saying. “You are my mate, Clara. I am taking back what was stolen from me.”

His mate? I was astonished that he really thought that, after all the time that had passed and everything that had happened. But the truth of it was, a ‘mate’ to him wasn’t a partner. A mate to him was an object—a possession. Hence, his feeling that I had been stolen away when really, I had found my freedom.

Shaking my head, I tried to formulate a response to what he had said, but it was impossible. My head was still muddled. I was confused and afraid, and above all, couldn’t believe that this was all happening to me. It didn’t seem real, like this was all some sort of hazy dream. If I were lucky, I would wake and go to hash things over with Maggie. Maybe we would laugh about how wild my imagination was while we started on our morning chores.

But already, I knew there would be no waking from this. It was all too real, from the cold that bit at me to the hollow feeling already growing inside me as Kypher forced me to walk alongside him toward the base that the Ak-hal built up over the years since they had fled the castle.

Because their old home had been such a point of pride, I knew that having to downsize their base must be a sore spot for the Ak-hal. While they had still managed to create something of beauty in this new base out in the arctic wilds, it was nowhere near as elegant and striking as Argaram Castle had been. Mithrim spires shone in the light, rising high in individual, protected towers. I could see other Ak-hal circling in and around these towers up above, in a strange sort of ballet. These towers all ranged in height, creating a shimmering backdrop against the whiteness. The highest of them stood at the very center, where it seemed to garner some protection from any potential threats. I assumed that this must be where the royal family lived.

Kypher led me to a smaller tower at the edges of the base, near to where we had landed. Several other Ak-hal turned our way when we entered, their eyes sliding my way and fixing on me as soon as Kypher pulled me in beside him. And in addition to the Ak-hal, there was a single human woman in the tower, whose face paled when her gaze fixed on mine. If it weren’t for protocol, I think she would have gasped in recognition. However, I did gasp when I saw her, for it had been a long time since last we met.

“Libba!”

I hadn’t known the woman for long before we parted those many years ago. She had just come to the Ak-hal, on the same ship that had brought Shay. I hadn’t liked her then. She had been a cold, ruthless woman who had jumped at the chance for immortality and who had done everything she could to betray those around her to gain an upper hand for herself. Though perhaps the reason I disliked Libba so much was that she reminded me, just a little, of myself in those early days of my life with the Ak-hal, when the idea of immortality—when the beauty of those beings—had enticed rather than repulsed me. However, seeing her now, it was obvious that something about the woman had changed.

Though she didn’t speak back to me, the disdainful look in her eyes that she’d had in the past disappeared. And I was acutely aware of the fact that even though she was supposed to be mated to Bahir, a noble, she stood here amongst lesser soldiers of the Ak-hal.

“Take her upstairs and dress her appropriately, Libba,” said Kypher. “I want her out of these savages’ rags.”

The other woman gave a short nod, and then I was pushed along and after Libba, toward a narrow set of stairs that spiraled up the tower. I quickly saw that the tower was made up of several floors, each of which was a separate apartment, presumably one for each of the Ak-hal. Libba led me to one of the upper floors and we stepped in together. It was only once we were alone that she quickly turned to me and spoke quickly in a hushed tone.

“Clara. Please. You have to help me get away from this place.” She reached out and took hold of me, a hand on each arm. “I know I was horrible back then. I know I made so many mistakes, and did so many awful things to you and Shay. But—”

“Libba?” I shook my head. She spoke so insistently and so fast that I could hardly wrap my head around what she was saying. “I don’t understand.”

She dropped her head down. I could see the full difference in her now as compared to the way that she had been before. She was a defeated woman, any pride that had been in her before now fully stripped away, leaving her bare and broken. Moving away from me, Libba walked to the edge of a long bed and dropped down. I noted for the first time how thin she was compared to the way that she had been before, and the ashen cast to her skin, feeling a surge of pity despite knowing everything that she had done.

“Bahir—my mate. They executed him not long after we set up our base here. He was one of those they blamed for the fall of Argaram Castle. But because there weren’t any more women…” Her voice faltered. I reached out slowly and let my hand fall on her shoulder.

“It’s okay,” I said softly, but she shook her head.

“They need all the women that they have, so they didn’t execute me with Bahir. Instead, they gave me away, but since I was… impure… I was only fit for a lesser soldier. Uldrith. He’s harsh and cruel. A monster.”

To me, all the Ak-hal were monsters, but I refrained from saying that. Instead, I continued to lay my hand on Libba’s shoulder as she quietly wept, doing her best not to let the sounds leave the room. After several long minutes of this, she looked up at me with her red-rimmed eyes and asked, “Clara? What are the Kamani like?”

“The Kamani? They’re… they’re wonderful,” I said. What else could I say? There were hardly any words good enough to describe them. They were agents of peace. They were a force for greatness. They had helped make me whole again after I had been broken down by my life in Argaram Castle.

“All I ever hear is that they’re beasts,” said Libba. “But I think… I think that I would rather live among beasts than keep on living this way.” She sniffled pathetically and wiped her hand over her face. Then she got up quickly, suddenly remembering that she was supposed to get me ready. She hurried to a large metallic wardrobe and pressed the panel on the front; it opened with a hiss to reveal an array of dresses. Pulling out a simple but elegant pale-green dress, she turned around and made her way toward me. However, I felt an immediate revulsion in the pit of my stomach.

“I won’t wear that,” I said.

Libba stopped where she stood, dress in hand, and gave me a strange look. “But…”

“I didn’t fight when I should have. But that just means I have to start fighting now. I won’t let myself go back to being the way I was before.”

And I realized then that I meant it. I had gone down without a fight, and that had been a mistake. But that only meant that now was the time for me to rise and take a stand. I was terrified, and I didn’t know what would come next, but I couldn’t just keep my head down and remain passive. I would fight back and I would return to the Kamani, where I belonged.