Chapter 23

Claire

“Your dancing is getting better.” Jonathan smiled as he twirled me around the yacht’s dance floor.

“Yours is still questionable.”

“It’s because I have a terrible teacher.” He laughed and pulled me into his arms. “Are you still on the fence about being my date to the IPO ball?”

I nodded. I knew he wanted me to go with him; he’d been making that fact very clear all week. Yet, it was still a while away and I was nervous about making our relationship public.

It seemed like we were the only people at corporate who’d been taking advantage of the invisible fraternization policy, and I knew my coworkers would have something negative to say about it.

“I’ll give you until the end of the week to say yes.” He dipped me low to the ground. “I’m not going with anyone else.”

“You could always go alone...”

He rolled his eyes and pulled me back up. “Let me know when you want Greg to take you shopping for a dress.” He brushed a stray hair away from my face. “I always take an employee as a date to the company’s social functions. No one will suspect anything.”

“So, you won’t touch or kiss me while we’re at the party?”

“I can’t promise that.” He tilted my chin up and brushed his lips against mine. “You know I don’t care who’s watching.” He traced my lips with his tongue and parted my mouth open, but then he stopped.

“Where is the pool?” “He said he had a pool.” “Maybe he lied about it to get us to come.” “How are we supposed to brag to the rest of the squad about being on a luxury yacht that doesn’t have a pool?”

He laughed and stepped back as Ashley and Caroline rounded the corner, staring at us.

Ashley breathed one of her most dramatic sighs. “You told us that there was a pool, Jonathan. We brought our bikinis and our cameras, but there’s no pool.”

“I’ll show you where it is.” He grabbed my hand and motioned for them to follow us. He led us up two stairwells and inside a massive room with walls that were covered in frosted glass. He hit the lights and then he pulled on a small lever—making the hundreds of dark gray panels on the floor slide open to reveal a clear blue pool.

“Ugh! How did he expect us to find this?” Caroline shook her head.

She and Ashley immediately tossed off their towels and slid into the pool, laughing about the many ways they planned on making their friends jealous.

“Would you like to finish your dance lesson now?” he whispered.

“I can’t use the pool?”

“There’s another one downstairs...” He slipped his arm around my waist. “You can use it after we’re finished.”

“Dancing?”

“You can call it whatever you want...”

––––––––

I couldn’t get into Girls’ Night...Not tonight.

All I could think about was Jonathan—him kissing me, him holding me, and him making love to me.

Ever since he’d said “I’ll do better,” he’d taken things to another level: He came over on the weeknights and hung out with me and my daughters—crushing me at Monopoly, helping them with their model planes, and even cooking for us sometimes. On the weekends, he treated us to full days at sea, bringing along a chef team that prepared whatever we wanted. He insisted on picking me up for work in the mornings, and he’d even managed to get me to eat lunch with him every afternoon.

The flowers he had delivered on a daily basis now included small chocolates and sweet little notes that made me blush. And the sex between us—though it’d always been amazingly mind-blowing, was becoming way more passionate and intense. 

Tonight, he was away at some conference in L.A. and I was missing him—truly missing him, and I was too scared to acknowledge the exact reasoning behind that.

“Some men really need to take a class on the proper way to please a woman.” Helen set down her glass. “It’s so sad when they don’t know how. These last few men have forced me to invest in a brand new vibrator. I’m thinking about starting my own website and giving free pointers.”

I sighed. “Do you keep track of how many men you’ve been with, or is that completely pointless now?”

“I stopped counting at thirty.”

“Thirty?”

“Or was it forty?” She shrugged. “Men do it all the time. I don’t ever want to be married, so why not?”

“You don’t ever want to settle down and—”

“Be with one man for the rest of my life? No. I’ve learned from the failure of my parents and all my friends’ marriages. No offense.”

“None taken.”

“How’s your cougar romance going?”

“I’m not a cougar...” I shook my head. “And it’s not a romance. It’s just...dating.”

“Exclusive dating?” She laughed.

“Yes...Where’s Sandra?”

“She’s not coming—something about a last minute date with that hot doctor you set her up with?”

“Oh! Well, good for her. I’m glad they’re still going out.”

“She said he’s an animal in bed. I can’t believe you passed him up! Then again...” She smiled. “Never mind.”

I set my drink down. “What happens when me and Jonathan don’t work out?”

“What?”

I decided to finally lay my pent-up insecurities on the table. I’d been holding them in for far too long and I wouldn’t dare tell Jonathan. It would just make him become even more wonderful and make me seem insane for even questioning this.

“You know we’re not going to last, Helen,” I said. “It’d never work. Everything that attracted him to me was superficial...Once those things wear off and he realizes that he could have someone half my age with half the baggage, it’ll be over...Then what happens? Do I date someone my age because dating a younger man in the first place is a bad idea? Do I date again at all? Or do I become like you and simply have sex with random men whenever I’m lonely?”

“Are you deliberately trying to kill my buzz or is this something—”

“I’m serious...I can’t talk to anyone else about this. There are some days when I honestly feel insecure about the whole thing.”

“Everyone feels insecure from time to time.” Helen sighed. “It’s normal.”

“But this is different. I don’t know how to deal with his—”

“Listen to me, Claire. Just stop. You think too much—wayyy too much. You know what you should do right now?”

“What?”

“Text him and tell him that you miss him.”

“Huh?”

“Tell him that you miss him.”

“I don’t miss him.” I lied. “I saw him a few days ago. Besides, he’s at some conference in L.A.”

She rolled her eyes. “You don’t have to have all the answers right now. If you two work out, great. If not, great. Take it as a learning experience. You don’t have to have a happily ever after with every guy you date. Just date, and for now be honest with yourself. You miss him.”

I tossed back a drink and decided to take her advice. I texted him. “I miss you...”

My phone vibrated immediately. “Where are you?”

“At a bar with Helen.”

“Which bar?”

“Blackbird.”

“Stay there. I’m on my way to get you.”

“I thought you were in L.A?”

“I am. It’s only a one hour flight (don’t worry) back to San Fran. I’ll see you soon.”

“Was that so hard to do?” Helen downed her gin and tonic. “Now, order me a new drink—an extremely stiff one. Your depressing psycho-babble completely wore off the effects of my last one. I didn’t even feel it burn.”

We both laughed and filled each other in on what had happened over the past few months: She’d officially been named “The Lawyer of the Year,” and had experienced “the sensations of a lifetime” with one of the other nominees when she’d gone to Vegas.

I was telling her about me and Jonathan’s most recent date when I felt my heart speeding up and fluttering against my chest, when I felt my body letting me know that he was somewhere nearby.

I turned around to look for him and saw him standing right behind me. 

“Good evening, Claire.” He grinned. “Hello, Helen.”

“Well, that’s my cue.” Helen smiled at us both. “I’ll see you two—”

“Are you okay to drive yourself back?” he asked.

“Oh, I’m not driving. I’m going to call a cab.”

He shook his head. “I’ll have my driver take you home.”

“Are you sure?”

“Absolutely.”

We walked outside where his town car was waiting and Jonathan helped her inside. “Have a good night, Helen. I’ll see you again soon I’m sure.” He shut the door and waited for the car to drive off.

“Come on.” He clasped my hand and walked me two blocks down, into a private parking garage.

We took the elevator up to the third level and walked over to his car. I was about to head over to the passenger side, but he pushed me against the car and wrapped his arms around my waist, kissing me until I was out of breath.

“I missed you too...” he whispered as he continued to make love to my lips. “Where do you want to go?”

“What do you mean? I—”

He tenderly bit my bottom lip to each syllable. “Where. Do. You. Want. To. Go?”

“Your place?”

“That’s forty minutes away...” He moved his kisses down to my collarbone. “Pick somewhere else.”

“My place?”

“Thirty minutes away...”

“A hotel?”

“Which one?”

“The Ritz Carlton around the corner?”

“Good choice.”