Oliver
The light of the new day blasts into the room like fireworks. It doesn’t feel like I’ve been asleep that long; my eyes are still sticky and thick with leftover bits of dreams dancing on my eyelashes. Yawning, I close my eyes again and snuggle back into the pillow, the aroma of sunflowers and strawberries filling my head. It’s so nice that it makes a wide smile spread across my face.
Oh, right.
I’m not alone.
Julie’s curvy body is tucked into mine—I can feel my hard-on poking her ass gently, but that doesn’t bother me as much as it probably should. When I open my eyes, I see a mess of honey blonde hair and I feel my hands sliding around her body without my consent or my direction. Julie’s body is real and it makes my head spin. I like that she’s softer—that I don’t feel bones when I slide my hands around her. She’s curvier than I’m used to. It’s exciting to think about her warm, thick thighs—exciting in a way I’ve never felt before. My hands finally stop a few inches short of her breasts, and now she’s gonna know for sure that I’m turned on because I’m getting harder. I have to let her go before she wakes up and kills me for touching her like I am.
I slide my arms out from around her and squint, watching her bite her bottom lip and smile into her pillow.
Oh, no. I have to get out of this bed.
Don’t look at her Oliver, just get up.
I manage to leave the bed without stirring her, but I tower over her body, assessing what I’ve just woken up to. I don’t even bother to dress before I open the bedroom door and sneak into the hallway, pushing the hair from my face so I don’t miss a step down the stairs. When I walk into the kitchen, I let out a huge, relieved sigh.
I didn’t make it without anyone else seeing me, though. Casey and Nora both raise their eyebrows at me over their coffee mugs, throwing knowing stares. “Good morning, Ollie,” Casey says and snickers. “You have some serious bedhead, brother.”
I growl. “You try sleeping next to a stranger.”
Nora giggles and slaps Casey’s hand away. Their PDA makes me want to gag—I wish they’d turn that crap off. “Oh, sometimes it’s not that bad,” she says.
“Coffee. I need coffee before I listen to all of this,” I grumble and push my hair back. “Then I’m going to work out.”
Casey scoffs. “No surprise there.”
I shake my head and pour the coffee. The steam tickles my nose as I blow on it—I don’t want to burn my mouth just in case I need it later for something exciting. Not only do I need to release tension about my hate for Heather, but now I need to add my lust for Julie to the list. I feel like my brain is tugging me in sixteen different directions and the two lovebirds making out in the corner aren’t helping me think any clearer. I know I have to go back into the bedroom to get workout clothes, so my heart skips a little. I hope I can sneak a peek of her sleeping again.
I enter the room and she’s cuddled up with all of the pillows, a sweet smile on her face.
Damn.
She’s cute.
Oh, dude, come on, get your stuff and get out of here.
I strip naked and throw on different sweats, a clean t-shirt, and a pair of socks, but finding my sneakers is a much harder task. That requires moving a bunch of stuff next to the bed and then sifting through a suitcase with a loud-ass zipper, but I succeed and nod in victory to myself.
My weight on the bed makes her stir a little. I pick up the coffee cup from the bedside table and swallow some before she rolls toward me. I freeze, thinking I did all that quiet maneuvering for nothing. Julie looks like she’s at such peace that it makes me smile. I wonder what she’s dreaming about—
No.
No, Oliver you don’t.
“Fuck,” I hiss. The weight of keeping myself from thinking about her is finally taking its toll on my mind. “I’m a fucking mess.”
I hear her yawn behind me. “You can say that again.”
Forcing a smile on my face, I turn to face her. “Well, good morning.”
“Yeah, morning.” She stretches out and she’s still small enough to fit into my pocket. Her hips call to me as the blanket uncovers them. Her teeth sink into her bottom lip as she fights sleep and tries her best to wake up. “Is that coffee?” She bats her eyelashes.
I hand her the cup without question. “Do you need anything else?”
Oliver, you aren’t her boyfriend…
She shakes her head and smiles. Her hair is a mess too. “I’m good, thanks for asking. That’s—”
“I have to get out of here,” I blurt before she can call me “sweet” again.
“Okay, see you.” She says it with such breeze that it actually feels like it annoys her that I don’t want to stay and talk. I’m probably blowing this entire thing out of proportion—I tend to do that with things—women—I want. She snuggles back into the blanket and closes her eyes, shutting me out and forgetting all about me.
I don’t like that at all.
I leave her and lock myself inside the basement gym, where I push my body harder than I probably should, but I’m so frustrated that it feels good to have the distraction. It’s temporary, though. The weights, the treadmill, the pull-ups, and the countless other body-numbing things I could’ve done…nothing makes me forget about the confusion inside my head.
Heather.
Julie.
I hate Heather.
I do not hate Julie.
I miss Heather.
After a few more minutes of killing myself and realizing it isn’t going to help me, I give up and wipe the sweat from my eyes, looking at the clock.
Eleven o’clock.
I’ve been in here for two hours.
The mini-bar has bottled water on top, so I grab one and drink it, then open a second and down that one too. My shirt is soaking wet, so I pull it off and almost do the same with my sweats but remember there are other people in the house. I’ll just have to suffer until I reach the bedroom.
“Whoa, hey,” I hear someone say behind me as I try to sneak up the stairs. “Sweat, much?”
I turn. It’s one of the other girls.
“Staci,” she says. I guess it’s obvious I don’t remember her name.
I click my tongue. “Yeah, sorry, I was working out.”
She bats her lashes—heavy with eyeliner—at me. “I can see that.” The growl in her voice grosses me out but I do my best to hide it. Okay, down girl. I definitely don’t need any of that.
“Working off some sexual tension?” She giggles.
You can say that again, a million times over.
I fake a laugh. “Sexual tension from who, exactly?”
She throws me a weird expression and it makes me uncomfortable to be alone with her.
“Okay, well, I’m headed up to shower now,” I blandly say.
She smiles. “Do you want company?”
“No thanks.” I smile at her.
Staci giggles and kisses me on the cheek. “Rain check, sexy?” I say nothing as she climbs the rest of the stairs and disappears.
“Propositioned by Staci on the second day,” Julie’s voice, amused, says from behind me. “I’m surprised it took her so long to try and snag you. Can you pick up your jaw from the floor and move so the rest of us can go about our days?”
I look at her with annoyance. “Jealous.”
Her laugh is loud and real. “Nowhere near jealous.”
“You know,” I growl and stand my ground, not letting her pass, “you’re frustrating as hell.”
Julie nods and her hair falls in waves around her face. “Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies. Can I pass now?” I give up and move my body over and she brushes past me, making damn sure she touches my arm with hers as she passes by.
“I’m heading up to shower, okay?” I call after her.
She ignores me—she’s already in the bathroom when I make my way upstairs and into our bedroom. Once again, I call out what my plans are, but she says nothing. I wait a few minutes before the annoyance builds up so much that I bite my cheek and open the door, not caring what she’s doing or what I’m about to see.
“Oliver!” she screams my name.
I mean—Screams. My. Name.
“Get out!”
Her body is stretched out, her right leg hoisted up on the sink. A towel is wrapped around her—I assume—naked body and she has knotted her honey hair on the top of her head. White shaving cream is lathered down her leg, and if she raises it any higher, I’m going to be able to see all of—everything. I startle her so much that her hand slips with the razor and she clutches her chest, catching her breath.
I’m the one to see the blood first.
“Oh, shit.” I run over to her, grab her slippery leg, and hold it firm. The remains of the shaving cream run down my hands and my mind goes blank. “You’re bleeding.” Her whimper makes me spring into action, scooping her up and getting into the shower with her to wash off the remaining shaving cream from both of us, but I quickly realize—when the water hits her open wound and she lets out a guttural, primal scream—that it’s the wrong thing to do. “I’m sorry,” I say as I pick her back up and start to panic a little more with each passing second.
Okay, Oliver, just calm down. Look at her leg.
The gash in her leg is pretty deep.
“I am so sorry,” I say again.
Julie blows out a deep breath. “It’s okay; it isn’t your fault.”
After placing a towel over the gash and pressing down, I carry her to the bed and sit down next to her. I keep applying pressure the best I can without hurting her. “I shouldn’t have scared you—I really am sorry,” I blurt out.
“Hey…” She tilts her head so she can look into my eyes. “It’s really okay. Let’s look at it.”
I suck in air through my teeth to brace myself. “It’s bleeding pretty badly; should I take you to the hospital?”
Julie laughs and I feel a little better. “I hardly think it’s that bad.” She pulls back the towel and a green look comes across her face. “On second thought, maybe we should go just in case.”
I groan. “I really am sorry—”
“You can grovel on the way to the hospital.” She waves me off. “Can I borrow one of your shirts and a pair of boxers?”
I instantly get hard when I see her slip into my clothes, careful not to get the blood on them, but I don’t care about that. I definitely didn’t want the first time I saw Julie naked to result in a trip to the ER. My clothes are wet from getting in the shower with her, so I change quickly while she’s distracted. Before she can protest, I pick her up, grab my keys and wallet, and carry her all the way through the house and to the Jeep. No one even notices us as I put her in the passenger seat and pull out of the long, gravel drive.
“Are you okay?” I ask her.
She doesn’t look at me. “I’m fine.”
You are not fine.
“Julie, I really am sorry.”
“You say that an awful lot to me.” Her voice is thick with ice and I know it’s to freeze me out. “I think I’ll sleep in the girls’ room and let you have the bedroom…it’s your house, after all.”
“No, I don’t want that,” I say, concentrating on the road the best I can.
Her sadness matches mine completely for the first time since we met. “I do.”
Oh, man. Dagger to my chest.
I’m seething now. I don’t know what else I can do to make her believe I’m a better person than this. I want her to see me how I see her so badly. “You have to believe that I didn’t mean to hurt you, right? I don’t know what it is we have between us, but the bickering and shit has to stop.”
Julie smiles when we arrive at the emergency room entrance. “You think we have something between us?”
“I don’t know, do we?” I smile at her. “I don’t want you to move rooms.”
“Then I won’t.”
She lets me help her out of the Jeep, then lets me throw one of my jackets over her as we walk through the emergency room doors. We check in and wait for what seems like forever. I offer her soda and candy as bribes, but it really seems like she’s okay when we finally get called back by a big, surly looking nurse. She moves Julie’s leg to the side and she winces in pain. Julie reaches for me and grabs my hand, squeezing tight enough where I feel a little pain. The nurse uses her forefingers to open the wound wider, making Julie bury her head into my chest and cry.
“Hey, you’re making her cry,” I snap at the nurse.
She rolls her eyes. “She needs stitches—how did this happen?”
“I cut myself shaving,” Julie sobs into my shirt. “Can you hurry?”
The nurse isn’t amused. “I’ll give you something for the pain and the doctor will come in and stitch you up. Be right back.”
I let Julie clutch onto me as long as she needs. After all, this is my fault. “Hey, Julie?” I say in a soft voice. “Do you want anything?”
Her small giggle excites me. “No, I’m still good. I’m sorry for wetting your shirt.”
My hair falls into my face as I look down at her, snuggled in my chest and—“Uh,” I mutter, slightly moving so she’d move her head, “I think I’ll go see where the doctor is.”
Before I can do anything, there’s a knock at the door and a doctor comes in, making a few corny jokes as the nurse gives us a bottle of pills for pain. Ten minutes later, we’re headed out the double doors and back to the cabin. Julie had taken one of the pills before we left and I notice her eyes starting to glass over a little, so I help her into the Jeep and shut the door behind her.
“Oliver?”
Oh, shit. Her voice drives me fucking crazy.
“Y-Yeah?” I croak.
Her honey hair is next to me now…her sunshine is breaking into my head. “Thanks for taking care of me. I’m glad I met you. You’re not self-absorbed and crude like Nora says…not really.” Her words slur as she snuggles into my side. The smart thing for me to do would be to put her back on her side, buckle her in, and go home.
“Nora said I was—?”
Her eyes are closed and I shake my head as she falls into a deeper sleep. Her body is cuddled into mine, so I wrap my right arm around her and pull the Jeep from the parking lot.
The rest of the drive back to the cabin is silent as she dozes off from the pills. I like her when she sleeps—she looks peaceful and at ease, like she knows something the rest of us don’t. I admit, I steal a few glances at her as I drive back to the cabin, unaware that both of our phones have been ringing off the hook the whole time we’ve been gone.
“Where the hell have you two been, and what the hell is wrong with her?” Nora screams at me when I carry Julie’s limp body into the house. She runs over to us and dramatically checks for a pulse. “Put her down! What did you do to her?”
Julie yawns and snuggles into my chest. “I had to get stitches.”
I raise my eyebrow at Nora. “Right leg, check it.”
She looks at her friend’s leg and then back at me. “And you took her to the ER?” Nora thinks for a moment. “Okay, that’s—fine, I guess. Thanks.”
“Wow, way to be sincere.” I snort. “Can you move so I can put her ass to bed? Someone self-absorbed and crude wouldn’t make sure she got there safely, would they?”
Nora blushes. “Oliver, I—”
I roll my eyes and blow hair from my face. “Save it. I don’t care what you think of me.”
Nora moves out of my way and I stomp, on purpose, all the way to the bedroom and lay Julie on the bed, collapsing next to her to catch my breath. She breathes softly and I know she’s asleep, so I don’t bother telling her to take off my jacket. I stand up and gently move her body horizontally, cover her with a light blanket at the end of the bed, and swiftly lie back down next to her.
I want her to roll over and lie on my chest.
Maybe I could give her a nudge.
No, don’t. Leave her alone.
Then, a knock on the door makes Julie stir and almost wake up.
“What!” I hiss toward the opening door.
It’s Casey. “Dude, is she really okay?”
“Shut the hell up!” I hiss again. “You’re going to wake her up!”
He holds up his hands in surrender. “Okay, okay,” he whispers and eyeballs the two of us, lying in the bed next to each other. “Is she okay? I see the bloody towels.”
I nod. “She’s fine. Twenty stitches, pain pills, and this—” I wave my hands over her body. “She’s a zombie.”
He stifles a laugh. “A cute zombie.”
“I’m going to try and take a nap; did you want something?” I snap.
“Just checking on her, man.” Defeated, he turns to leave the room. “Look, I’m sorry about what Nora thinks about you, okay? She knew you before she and I met, and I really like her. I thought bringing her here with you would change her mind on it.”
“I don’t remember meeting her, Casey,” I tell him.
He shrugs. “I know that, man. Look, don’t worry about it. I’ll leave you two alone.”
I salute him as he walks out, then get up to light the fireplace. I poke the wood until cozy warmth fills the chilly room. It’s always cooler at Lake Reed no matter what time of the year it is.
I slide back in next to her and relax, making sure I don’t touch her in any way. The fire snaps and I smile; I like that sound.
Julie softly moans in her sleep.
I definitely like that sound.
Heather.
I thought Heather was cute too.
And sweet. Kind. Loving. Wife material, maybe.
Turns out, she isn’t.
I drift into a light sleep.
***
As I enter my front door, I think that it’s weird that Heather’s Audi is home in the middle of the day. I’m pretty sure she has a standing mid-afternoon social event every day, so coming home at two o’clock on a Thursday and seeing her car here is a bit odd. I know I haven’t been home much; my grandfather had some business I needed to tie up in New York. I was pretty good about keeping tabs on the woman sharing my bed, but still, maybe she invited some friends over that she neglected to tell me about.
You know better than that, Oliver.
Turn back.
I put my keys in that stupid ceramic bowl Heather insisted on paying three hundred dollars for and scowl.
Dude, turn back.
I hear her. She giggles and moans.
TURN. BACK.
She moans louder. My heart races because I haven’t heard that moan in weeks.
I want her.
I want to burst into the room and take her—she must be watching a dirty movie.
I hear her moan again, louder, as I get to the bedroom door.
You don’t want to go in there.
I go in there because I want her.
I go in there and see her with someone else.
They don’t see me.
She moans and calls out his name.
Suddenly, the room is empty and they’re gone.
I smell bacon and my mouth waters. I follow the scent downstairs into the kitchen at the cabin.
Julie.
Her face brightens when I walk in. I’m confused, but watching her twitter about, humming to herself and mixing some large bowl of batter, my heart sings.
Yeah, fucking sings.
“Hey, don’t just stand there.” She giggles. “Lend me a hand.”
I smile down at her as I approach her side. She giggles again and hands me a wooden spoon and the bowl, mouthing the word, “Stir” at me. I do what she says; I’m afraid to disappoint her. Her long honey hair is braided down her left side and I feel my legs start to shake from excitement. She dips her finger in the batter and puts it in her mouth, sucking off the tan glob. Her eyes roll to the back of her head. “Perfect.”
I groan. “Why do you like to tease me so much?”
She smiles around her finger. “Why do you like it so much?”
“I think you mean why do I love it so much?” The smile that spreads across my face is instant and feels good…it feels so damn good to be happy. I can’t remember this feeling; I’m not even sure that I’ve felt this kind of happiness before I met Julie. I don’t even know what it is about her that makes me happy, not that I care to question it.
I raise my hand to touch her face, bringing my lips down to meet hers. She kisses me with so much longing that it’s hard to breathe after a few minutes. I press her body against mine and lift her up, placing her on the kitchen counter and losing myself, kissing and nibbling on her neck and collarbone.
Julie whispers my name.
“My head is going to fucking explode.” I try and catch my breath as I nuzzle her ear and my lips graze the curve of her neck. “I don’t know what you’re doing to me, Julie.”
“It’s okay to let go and feel something,” Julie tells me as she tangles her long fingers in my shaggy hair. “We can be like this, you know. We can have this.”
“I don’t want you to hurt me,” I admit to her. “I’m done with that.”
Her giggle is sexy. “I won’t hurt you unless you want me to.”
“When did you get so bold?” I ask, pressing my body deeper between her open legs. She lets me in without restriction. She wants me too.
“Another time. It’s time for you to wake up.”
And sexy Julie is gone.
***
My eyes open swiftly. “What the hell?” I whisper.
“Did I wake you?” Julie asks, still half-asleep next to me.
I shrug my shoulders and shake my head. “You could say that.”
Right here.
Right here is where it started.
I have a series of pissed-off moments where I wish I could go right back to sleep and back to my dream, followed by several screw-it moments where I want to ignore my mind completely and do something stupid. There is a war waging between my head and my heart.
My head wins.
“Screw it,” I say out loud.
Julie looks over at me, confused. I don’t let her speak—I pull her toward me and devour her lips. I’m hungry for her after that dream; I want her more than I’ve ever wanted anyone. I can feel her relax her body into mine as I kiss her, our lips parting and re-joining as we breathe shallowly together. She lets out a small moan into my mouth and I tighten my grip on her, pressing my hard-on into the bare flesh of her thigh.
This is everything I thought it would be.
I am kissing Julie.
My thumb finds the corner of her mouth and rests there. I am leading her lips on a roller coaster ride; her mouth tastes like mint.
I make myself pull away from her and look down. Her eyes are on fire.
“What—what was that?” she breathes.
My eyes close and I shake my head. “Fuck, I’m sorry.”
“For what?” she says, touching her lips. “That was…intense.”
“I shouldn’t have done that.”
Julie’s face falls. “Oh, I see.”
“No, it’s not you,” I assure her and run my fingers through my hair. “I just don’t want to give you the wrong idea.”
“By kissing me?” she hisses. “Oh my God, just when I thought you couldn’t be any more of a jerk.”
She leaves me on the bed alone, everything short of slapping me in the face. I deserve it, I really do. I want her so bad, but I’m not willing to lie to her to get it. I don’t want to take her home—I want to sleep with her for a week and then leave her behind, right?
Keeping it casual.
See, there I am.