While Royce and I pace back and forth, trading places in front of the windows Adam calls out, “Uh. Does anyone feel like the air is so tense in here the room’s about to split in half while we all stare at this phone?”

He’s sitting between Hunter and Gregory who’ve been squished on the couch in our suite, ever since the press conference ended. Evie and Apple left us after the press conference so the baby could sleep in her own little crib, but everyone else has been pacing the room along with me.

Adam groans again, this time stretching his back. “I swear the walls are cracking too, and if we keep staring at the same spot, I’m sure the table under this phone is going self combust.”

“He’s right. Dear, me.” Mrs. Felix, laughs a little. We all pause to watch her while she zooms her wheelchair around in a small-nervous-circle and then she returns to the table to stare again—as do all of us—like even she can’t take her eyes off the phone.

“Waiting is the most excruciating thing, isn’t it? Gregory, please open a window?”

Gregory obliges, lifting the curtain and cracking one of the tall windows about four inches.

Sage, who’s been perched on the edge of a chair, puffs out a frustrated sigh and pulls out his phone, checking the time. “It’s been way more than an hour. Maybe because Dad hasn’t called us yet, maybe…none of it’s true?”

Hunter throws a wadded up napkin at my brother. “Dude. Don’t even go there. Of course it’s true. Your dad is fine, he’s been recovered. He’s all good. These things take time.”

Gregory pulls a face, but it’s more to hide what I think may be his own worries. “I would not have made such a serious announcement to you or to the press if the story were not true. They did say he was weak, and as we all know he had been under a lot of stress. Maybe he had information on the people who were holding him, and he’s still in debriefing.”

Mrs. Felix adds, “Or, maybe he needed some sort of minor medical treatments. It’s very possible he was dehydrated and they had to hook him up to an IV, or maybe the poor man simply fell asleep?”

“My father would call us, even if he felt like falling asleep,” I whisper. “I’m with Sage. Maybe something is wrong.”

Royce pauses in his pacing right in front of me, examining my face in that over-analyzing way he always does, then he pulls me into a small version of his bear hug. “Well, whatever the reason, he’s going to call eventually, but I’ve decided we don’t all have to sit here like this. I think we should all return to normal activities. We’re all on jet-lag here. We should try to sleep some, or tomorrow’s tours of Paris will be wasted.”

“I agree.” I sigh. “It’s so cool of you guys to want to be here for me, but we are all exhausted.” Without thinking, or because it’s become a habit, I take up Royce’s hands and squeeze them both as I pull out of his comforting embrace, adding, “I think Sage will sleep in here on the chaise, or on a rollaway like he did back in London?” I turn to my brother, because after all that’s gone down these past months, he hates when people make decisions for him. “I mean, if you want to do that again, Sage?”

Sage stands and stretches his arms over his head. “Hell yes, I do. I also want to move the furniture so my hand is resting on the phone while I sleep,” he adds, suddenly sounding too old and like some low-voiced man instead of sounding like my little brother. “And…did we check the damn thing again to make sure it’s working?”

For the first time ever, Mrs. Felix or I don’t chastise him for cursing, but from the circles under her eyes, I get that maybe Mrs. Felix’s slip means that she’s more tired than all of us are.

“It’s working,” I say, picking up the receiver, hitting speaker so everyone can hear the dial tone, then hanging it up really fast again, just in case that one move has caused us the miss the call. “Everyone, thank you for your love, for your support. Go to bed,” I add. “I promise to text a big group message a simple thumbs up when he calls and all is well. Okay? Because all will be well.”

Gregory nods, agreeing, “Thank you. Yes. A good idea.”

Vere gives me a quick hug, her big brown eyes are encouraging and smiling as always, while Gregory’s already maneuvering his mom’s wheelchair out the door.

Hunter and Adam exit next, with Vere trailing behind them.

“Text right away, dear.” Mrs. Felix calls out. Vere turns and locks eyes with me one last time.

As the door closes, I call back, “Promise. Right away.”

I return to the table to stare at the phone just how I vowed I wouldn’t while Sage grabs an orange juice off of the fancy room-service cart we’d all been munching snacks off of this whole time, while Royce starts scooting furniture around. “Sage. I’ll move this so you’re close to Robin. I think I can stick the phone on to a side table and jam right between you two so you won’t miss the call.”

I smile my gratitude at Royce while Sage sets down his juice to help Royce shove the ornate chaise over to my side of the bed, all while I turn back and continue to stare at the phone.

I find that I’m doing it even more steadfastly than before, because now I’m the only one left responsible for it.

Once Sage is settled on his chaise with pillows and blankets, Royce comes to stand behind me, and he drops his hands onto my shoulders, pressing thumbs into the tight muscles of my back. His first movements nearly melt me with the instant relief he’s brought me. “Breathe. Your father is okay.” He trails his fingers under my hair and gently presses away the rods of steel that my thoughts and worries have made out of my neck. “Thank you,” I breathe out, turning to face him, only to find him frowning and unable to meet my gaze.

“What?” I ask.

“I…uh, just wanted to tell you that I can leave you and Sage in here alone, if you want? Like to have it be just you two, together…you know for when the call comes in?” He shrugs.

“No!” Sage and I both reply at the exact same time.

Sage is sitting straight up on the chaise now. “Robin’s going to be all blubbery and awkward afterwards. You have to stay, because I can’t deal with that. You’re the ones with matching wedding rings. That’s your husband-job, right?”

“Right.” Royce grimaces at that, and he gives me a look I don’t understand as Sage goes into the bathroom to brush his teeth. “Robin, I’m serious? Am I making this awkward?” he whispers out quickly as Sage shuts the door.

“Do you want to leave, because if you don’t want to be here that’s understandable,” I ask, tension shooting straight up my neck again as I pull on my oversized sleep hoodie. “But…I can’t imagine going through that phone call without you by my side.”

He looks over his shoulder to be sure the bathroom door is still closed. “Yeah, but remember? Sage doesn’t know our marriage is fake. Do we tell him now? If you talk to your father, you’re going to have to explain some things about us to him, and…shit. I don’t want to let the kid down, but like, what if Sage gets upset about all of the lies? He’s my bro now. The idea of disappointing him makes me sad.”

The bathroom door swings open, and Sage stalks out holding his hands up. “Guys. I already know about how this has all been a ‘marriage of convenience’ or whatever arrangement you have between you.”

“How. Who told you?” Royce nearly chokes on his words, flushing suddenly bright red.

“Your grandmother is going deaf.” Sage starts fluffing his pillows. “And when she talks to your uncle, she sort of shouts. That’s how. I knew two days after you two got hitched.”

“Why didn’t you say anything? Talk about it with me?” I gasp out.

He shrugs. “What was there to say? Once the stars got out of my eyes, and once I was safe from being forced to go back to North Carolina, I didn’t care if it was fake or not.” Sage delivers a wide smile to both of us. “Because fake or not, it was…is totally awesome. Mrs. Felix and I have talked about it a few times, because she’s always checking in like she’s a real grandmother to me. She asks me all the time if she thinks I need a therapist from all of this. ” He laughs and puts his hands up to his eyes, rubbing them and yawning some before continuing, “Which is why I didn’t want to talk about it with you, Robin. Because I can’t change it, and because the whole thing is so nice. What everyone’s done for us, it makes me choke up and cry like a baby even if I think about it.” He pulls in a loud sniffle. “See? It’s happening even now.” He shakes his head, blinking tears away. “Who wants to cry in front of your sister and the dudes from your very favorite band? Not me.” He pulls in another long sniff and crosses his arms.

Royce walks over and pulls him into a half hug. “Dude. You’re so cool, you know that?”

“Back at you.” Sage says, voice slightly quaking as he’s trying not to tear up again.

“Swear you’re not mad?” Royce asks him.

Sage’s next sniffle is longer and louder, but thankfully he doesn’t let the tears he’s trying to swallow flow. “How can I be mad? I like—love—Robin being married to you, Royce. It makes me feel so damn happy, because I know she’s been safe. You’ve protected her in every way that I would want to do, and you’ve been building that pillow fort each night like a pro.” He points at our bed. “And I know you are such a cool guy to do that—to respect my sister how you’ve done. And…like…every day Robin tells me about how much she admires you and that she loves the person that you are, so how could I be mad about any of this?”

Royce raises his brows and darts me a glance at what Sage has just said, because I’m not sure I’ve shared those exact sentiments with Royce quite yet; but I don’t deny it. I simply nod as Sage continues, “And…shit, dude. You went all out and helped us find our father. If you hadn’t married Robin, maybe our dad, maybe he would still be a hostage somewhere and…not okay.”

My chest twists as a few tears escape and fall down his cheeks.

Royce draws the kid into another full hug and after a moment, Sage adds a muffled whisper, “Thank you, Royce. Just, thank you. I know that if our father had never been found, that you all were setting up something permanent to keep me in school and keep both of us housed and safe. Like…you’d meant to be with us for the long haul and that means everything.”

“Hell yes, Dude. Of course we’d have been there—without question.” Royce’s answering voice is sandpaper-low as he looks over Sage’s head and paints me with tears glistening in his silver-bright eyes.

“Yeah well,” Sage goes on, shuddering out a long breath and pulling awkwardly away from Royce’s hug. “I don’t know where to put what you did, or hardly even how to think about it.” He rubs a hand against his tear-wet cheeks, trying to get it together. “Because what you did, shit.” He shakes his head. “And then, bringing us to Europe and everything? It is so huge, that it’s easier to not think about or talk about it with you guys, you know? I should have said something sooner, or tried to say thanks more. Just wanted you to know now, that’s all.”

I nod, completely choked up. Luckily, Royce saves me from answering with, “Dude. I totally understand. As long as you and I are good, and you’re good with how we pulled off all of this lying, that’s all I care about.”

“Cool.” Sage shakes his head and moves away to sit on the couch. “I probably would have pitched a fit during the wedding had I figured it out earlier.”

Finally able to talk, I laugh and agree with him. “I knew that to my core. It’s why I didn’t want you to know. Because you’d feel guilty and you would have tried to stop it.”

“Yeah…I would have. Because I wanted it to be me fixing everything for Robin and I, but I couldn’t. But when I get older—grow up, I’m going to figure out a way to pay you back. Both of you.”

I smile at my little brother and join him on the couch, hugging him way too hard. “Sage. It’s possible you’ve already grown up because of all you’ve just said. And you never, ever have to pay us back. Never.”

“Yeah.” Royce crosses his arms over his chest, smiling at Sage. “Whatever happens, and wherever your father takes you after this, we’re going to be part of your family now. It’s not like we can go back from this or forget, right? I messed up your lives then married your sister to make it right. We care so much about you two now that it’s…gone deep. I mean…shit…we’re going to be friends forever after this, aren’t we?” His eyes skate to mine, and then away, and for some reason the look he’d shot at me had made me sense he’s holding back, and that there’s a whole bunch of words he is not saying right now.

Makes my tummy hurt, makes my heart ache, makes me feel like all of the air is going out of me. Because…like what my brother just said. What is there to talk about right now that’s not going to hurt between the three of us?

He’s Royce Devlin. And despite the name I’ve got on my driver’s license right now, I’m still—always and forever going to be—Robin Love.

He wants to be friends forever, when he’s got no clue that he and I being just friends passed by me so long ago, that I can’t hardly remember if he and I ever were just friends.

How’s that for admitting that things have gone…deep? Deep is an understatement about the extra two-million-feels I’m going to have for him for the rest of my personal forever—whether he loves me back the same or not.

Looking at his tortured expression now, I figure that it’s possible the guy has some extra feelings floating around about me right now, too. Simply because we’ve grown so accustomed to each other that…well, now that everything is going to change between us, he’s probably feeling weird about it, too.

His feelings will fade, mine probably will, too. I would also assume his will fade much easier than mine. His life moves Air Force fighter jet fast. He’ll simply zoom ahead to the next cool city, to the next show he’s got to preform, that when he comes up for air to wonder about us—to remember this month we’ve shared? He will be planets away, probably cutting album number ten.

I will be living my life, too. Hopefully, I’ll be in NYC, starting art school if all is well with my dad. But for my extra-big-fun, I’ll only just be downloading the Uber app for the first time, because I heard you need Uber in NYC, and buying new paints and… socks or…yeah… normal stuff like that.

I figure Royce gets how we’re about to split apart like one of those rockets to the moon, one part going all the way up, while the other bits fall back to earth. So, of course, just like whatever it is he’s not saying to me right now, I’m not saying my stupid lines of what is completely obvious, right back to him.

I’m pasting on my own small smile while trying to live this moment, because here and now, he is still our friend. He did help my find my father, so he’s also our hero and he will always be that to me. And, better, it’s not quite over yet, is it?

Royce and I are going to spend some days seeing Paris together.

So…yeah. Whatever becomes of us a month from now…or ten years from now, I need to just realize that all of what he and I have shared has been more than enough. I can’t expect or even want more when I’ve already had so much. Besides, none of this was ever supposed to be real.

Like my brother’s somehow psychic, and because the kid is too young to process all that I’ve just swallowed down, Sage suddenly blabs it all out loud: “Do you really mean we’ll be friends forever, dude? Because.” Sage glances at me, then back to Royce. “I have this weird feeling, like…maybe we’ll never see you again once my dad comes back. Or, I’m wondering if all of this will become some sort of a strange memory. Or…” He blinks. “Wait. It will all feel like we dreamed this whole thing. Hell, it kind of already does, right, Robin?”

“Oh. Well. It’s silly to speculate, right? And don’t cuss.” I snap out. “I mean, like Dad hasn’t even called us yet, so let’s just don’t play it too far forward yet, okay? I don’t want to jinx anything.”

Sage shrugs and lets his shoulders droop. “Yeah. Right. Sorry.” He points at the horrible, endlessly-silent telephone. “I…uh…don’t know what I’m trying to say anyhow, except maybe that I’m really tired?” Sage looks away from both of us and toward the window, which highlights the very dark circles under his eyes.

I hate that I don’t have the courage to meet Royce’s gaze right now, so I also stare out the window. “Me, too.”

Royce’s voice is clear and unwavering as he steps up and places a hand on my shoulder. “Then, let’s just all try to get some sleep, okay?”

“It’s all going to be fine,” I whisper out the words I always used to say to Sage when things were not fine—when we were runaways. I regret that I’ve said them now, because they’ve somehow made Sage look even more deflated. Quickly, I add, “Royce is right. Let’s all snuggle up to our pillows, okay?”

I finally risk looking at Royce, watching as he stalks away to the couch to gather up some more pillows and seat cushions for the pillow fortress, acting as though this is any other normal night for us.

Breathing in again, I take stock of my lungs, surprised that they feel normal, that I’m able to simply breathe in and breathe out just fine right now.

As for my heart beating okay?

Well…it’s not doing as well, because I think it’s cracked right in half.