My lips still tingle hours after Devon left my shop. I'm trying to focus on the dragon I'm tattooing onto my client, but damn it, my mind keeps going back to what happened earlier. The way he looked, stalking into my office, his take-charge alpha demeanor, and the way he grabbed me, smashing our lips together. It felt right, perfect, like I’ve always remembered, and yet, it felt new, thrilling, and earth-shattering. For a brief moment in time, I forgot, forgot everything in the past, all the time that has gone by, and my shattered heart.
The palm of my hand stings, remembering the slap across his face. I'm not a violent person. Really, I'm not, but who does he think he is? No matter how hot and sexy it was, he didn't have the right to kiss me. He lost that privilege long ago, the night he decided to up and leave without so much as a goodbye.
I feel like I'm giving myself whiplash with all of my confusing back and forth. I love him, but I'm mad at him. I don't want him to kiss me, but my heart wants to beg for more. I want him to stay gone so I don't get hurt, so Zane doesn't get hurt, but I want to see him a lot more. My soul yearns for the boy I loved, my soul cries for its mate, but my head screams that he’s trouble and to stay far, far away from the man who could destroy me all over again. Eleven years ago I shattered and the pieces were never put back together, but he could mend it all if he can prove he means what he says, that he speaks the truth.
I dip the needle into the black ink and zone in on finishing Makayla's outline on her outer thigh, up onto her hip, and curving around to her stomach. Her outline alone is taking hours. We're already three hours in, but the fine details will have me here for hours after closing. Since it's such a big tattoo, and I don't want to take the chance of giving her skin too much trauma or having the colors bleed together, I’ll have her come back in two weeks to get the color put in. I've already called my mom to pick up Zane and I'll go by my parents to get him before going home.
* * *
I park in the driveway at my parents’ house. The small brick home is the same one I was raised in, the one I still love and have so many memories in. I stride up the sidewalk and step onto the front porch. I open the front door without knocking and join my mom in the living room. "Zane sleeping?" He should be, it's close to ten P.M. and past his bedtime.
"Yes." Mom yawns. "I think he wore your dad out today, wanting to play catch for hours." She laughs. “Your dad went to bed a couple of hours ago too.”
I mimic her. "Sounds like, Z." My laugh and smile become somber. "I saw Devon."
She freezes, staring at me. It takes a few seconds for her to gain her composure. "When?"
I sit in my dad’s blue recliner. "Last week, yesterday, today."
She clears her throat. "How long has he been back? What's going to happen? Has he answered for himself?"
I put a hand up. "Wow, Mom. Stop." I laugh lightly. "He's been back for years. I don't know what's going to happen, and a lot of questions have been asked between the both of us, but not nearly all of them."
She nods, but her lips purse. "Why is he just now showing up?"
I dip my chin to my chest. "We ran into each other by accident. He knows about Zane." I'm almost thirty, but I'm not telling her I took Zane to the Satan's Sinners compound. Everyone in this town knows their reputation. She would be pissed knowing I took him there, not to mention that I went into business with them.
Her eyes widen immensely. "I hope he doesn't think he can just bulldoze into Zane’s life after all this time."
I shake my head. "I explained to him that I need to be sure before I introduce them."
"Good." Satisfaction shines in her gaze. "Are you hungry? I made roast."
I give her a small grin. "I could eat."
I follow her into the kitchen, she heats up a plate for me, and I sit at the breakfast nook.
My fingers fidgeting, I stare at them and ask absently. "Is it wrong of me to want to forgive Devon? To want us to be a family?"
She sets the plate down in front of me with a glass of iced tea. "No, honey. You know your father and I have always considered Devon part of this family, even after leaving, but he hurt you and you being hurt, hurts us.” She’s silent for a moment then says, “I've always wondered if something made Devon leave the way he did."
With knitted brows, my gaze connects with hers. "What do you mean?"
She shrugs her shoulder. "I don't know really. You were his whole world, you two had plans, and he just left. It always seemed strange to me."
That surprises me because she’s never mentioned anything before. I take a bite of my food and slowly chew it as I think about her words. "I always assumed he left because we fought that night."
She sits across from me and holds her own glass of tea. "Whatever the reason was, it doesn't give him the right to disappear like that. He has a lot to answer for." Her eyes bore into mine. "I want you to know that me and your father are so proud of you. We always have been, and we may not tell you enough, but you are an amazing mom. Everything you have accomplished is admirable."
"Mom." Tears well in my eyes.
She reaches over taking my hand in hers. "Whatever happens with you and Devon, you deserve to be happy and don't settle for anything less."
I nod and wipe away the stray tear running down my cheek. "Thank you."
I finish my roast, potatoes, and carrots, then walk into my old bedroom.
I nudge Zane, waking him enough to get his shoes on and stumble out to our car in order for us to go home.
* * *
I started working on some new tattoos I have coming up for appointments. Audrey pokes her head into my office. "Doc's here." She has a silly grin on her face.
"Send him back."
A few minutes later, he walks in and I almost bust out laughing. "What are you doing?"
He smiles broadly and takes a seat. "I remembered how much you loved it when I wore shit like this." He's wearing loose-fitting jeans, an old band shirt with the sleeves ripped off, his baseball cap is turned backward, and no cut. He's right, I did love it. I thought he was the sexiest boy to walk the halls of our high school. But...I can't deny seeing him in his cut gives him a sex appeal that is outta this world. It gives him a hard exterior that screams rough and dominate.
My own smile widens, and I shake my head. "We aren't teenagers anymore." I give no hint to the fact that I still think he's the sexiest man to walk the earth.
"So whatcha doin'?" He leans over my desk, looking at the drawing I'm working on. It's a woman's face with long dark hair blowing in the wind. "That's really good, Daph. You always were unbelievably talented. I could watch you for hours drawing in your sketchbook."
I laugh lightly. "I remember too. And you would always try to distract me." After a long silence, he would lean closer to me and kiss my neck or tickle me until I was screaming in a fit of laughter.
He clears his throat. "Yeah, good times."
I rub the back of my neck. It's a little tight from having my head bent for so long. "Have you thought about what tattoo you want?"
"Are you going to tattoo me?"
I glance at him and shake my head. How, after all this time, does he still make me feel like a young girl with a crush? He still makes those butterflies swarm in my belly, my heart race, and nervousness takes hold of me. If I’m not careful, I’ll lose all sense of clarity and give in to the temptation that is Devon Mayfield.
"Then nope." He leans back in the chair.
Neither of us says anything for hours. He stays watching me work, he stays while I take care of my appointments, and he stays until I leave for the day.
He walks me out and reaches for my hand. I let him take it and it feels nice, feels like it used to, but new at the same time. It’s so weird how all of this is a mixture of past and present, old and new. "So, I'll see you tomorrow?"
I beam brightly. "Yeah."
He grins like a Cheshire cat and nods once. He drops my hand and starts to walk toward his bike. I narrow my eyes when I see the scars peeking out of the back of his shirt. What happened to him? I’m beginning to wonder if there really is truth to his words, “I’m damaged. I’m broken good.” Maybe we can heal together, but I need to know what happened to the boy I loved.
I climb into my car, start the ignition, and drive to pick Zane up from school.
Day one of mending is over.