Chapter 11

“What’s going on, M? You’ve stopped coming to the house. I never see you anymore.”

Meredith raised her eyes from her salad and faced her father. “I’ve been busy.”

“How are your studies?”

“Fine.”

“I’m glad you called and suggested lunch.”

“I thought you would like that.” Meredith needed to learn more about Thompson, and since her father had talked about him in the past, she figured she’d start there.

“You’re not being your usual cheerful self. Things are not fine.”

“Everything is fine,” she insisted.

“When I asked Pam if she had seen you, she brushed it off. Sounds to me like you two had another argument. We both only want the best for you. We care about you.”

“She’s not my mother.”

“She’s obviously not your mother, and no one is saying she is, but Pam has been part of your life since you were sixteen. Don’t dismiss her contribution to who you are today.”

Meredith didn’t want to get into a conversation with her father about Pam. She needed to placate him. “I might have hated Pam when I first met her, but I was a teenager. I would have hated any woman. You’re right, sometimes we fight, but it’s nothing serious. Pam and I are fine. Believe me.”

“A friend of mine mentioned he saw you having drinks with Isaac Croswell. Are you two dating?”

Meredith almost dropped her fork. “You know Isaac?”

“Socially. Chicago can be a small city.”

“He never mentioned you to me.”

“I’m assuming he was distracted.”

“By what?”

“I’m your father, don’t make me spell it out to you.”

“We’re not sleeping together if that’s what you’re trying to get at.”

“Who you choose or don’t choose to have sex with is up to you. I’ve never gotten involved in that aspect of your life and I’m not going to start now. All I can hope is that your choices prove that I’m a good father and that I raised you well.”

“I never accused you of not being a good father. You’re certainly better than most.”

Meredith put a fork filled with spinach in her mouth, forcing herself to chew. She wondered why she had ordered the salad when there were several other items on the menu she’d rather eat. She hated salad. It was messy and by the end of it she would still be hungry.

“Are you still planning to move to France once you’re done with your Masters?” he asked.

“You don’t think it’s a good idea?”

“On the contrary, I believe it’s exactly what you need. The next chapter in your life. I can help you get settled.”

“Are you saying you’ll pay for it?”

“You’re my only child and living in Paris will make you happy. I will do anything in my power to make that happen. I’m not spoiling you. I’m helping you achieve your dream.”

Meredith smiled. “An apartment in the Sixth Arrondissement?”

Samuel smiled back at her. “You remind me of your mother. She also loved Paris, and that was her favorite neighborhood. We used to visit the city twice a year before you were born. It reminded her of St. Petersburg. She was permanently homesick.”

“And then I came along and ruined everything.”

“That’s not true, M. We wanted you very much. And after you were born we continued to take you everywhere we went. You were just too young to remember, that’s all.”

“You two always sounded too perfect. There had to be something wrong with you guys. I don’t know anyone who has happily married parents.”

“Pam and I are happily married.”

“You’re happily married because you’re both always working. You live separate lives. She’s obsessed with her murder cases and you, I don’t know”—she played with a piece of cucumber on the edge of her plate—“lock away as many people as possible, I guess.”

“Both Pam and I love this city. We have dedicated our careers to it, and everything we do is to protect the ideals we believe in. Our strong love for Chicago is what brought us together and one of the reasons our marriage works. We have common goals.”

Meredith saw this as the perfect opportunity to shift the conversation. “That reminds me, I just read an article about Steven Thompson. It jumped out at me because you, Pam, and I once had a conversation about him and Mayor Matheson. Do you guys know Thompson?”

“What was the article about?”

Meredith took a long sip of her water so she could buy herself time to come up with an answer. “Something about the city,” she replied, making herself sound nonchalant.

“Steven was the one who introduced Pam and I,” Samuel chuckled. “I always said I owed him one.”

Meredith was sure her jaw had just touched the tabletop.

“But we aren’t friends. If you recall, Pam is not his biggest fan.”

“You met Pam through Thompson?” She couldn’t believe it.

“They went to college together. He introduced us at a fundraiser.”

“How about Thompson’s wife? Do you know her?”

“We frequent the same circles. I’ve seen her a few times but we’ve never been formally introduced. Why do you ask?”

Meredith hoped she wouldn’t end up spitting up organic leafy greens all over the pristine white tablecloth. Conveniently, Pam hadn’t mentioned her connection to Thompson.

“You look upset, M.”

“I find it surprising that Pam and Thompson have known each other since college, that’s all.”

“Why?”

“Because he’s—” Meredith stopped herself mid-sentence. It was best not to mention the details of Sofia’s murder and Tatiana’s presumed disappearance with her father. She didn’t want the discussion to lead to Julian. Instead, she came up with another answer. “I got the impression that Thompson comes from money and Pam had—how should I put it—a more humble background.”

“She grew up in Albany Park.”

“I guess that makes her from the right side of town.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“C’mon, you raised me in a bubble. We still live in one. You don’t mingle with anyone that doesn’t belong in your world, so I never really understood how you and Pam came to be. But if she’s from Albany Park and she went to college with someone like Thompson, she’s not the rough-around-the-edges, South Side homicide detective that she pretends to be. It explains things.”

Her father sighed, resting his fork in his plate. “You told me you and Pam were on good terms but that’s clearly not the case. What can I do to fix whatever is going on between the two of you?”

“She’s a lying bitch. Can you fix that?”

“Meredith, stop it.” Samuel kept his voice low but his tone was stern. “I won’t have you talk about her like that. She’s my wife and your stepmother. You are going to sit down and have a conversation like two adults. Can you come by the house tonight?”

“I can’t. Got things to do.”

“Cancel whatever you have going on. We’re having a family meeting.”

“A family meeting? What the hell are we? The Brady Bunch?” She removed the napkin draped over her lap and placed it on the table. “I’m not coming.”

“You and Pam are working out this nonsense tonight or you can kiss the apartment in the Sixth Arrondissement goodbye. What’s it going to be, Meredith?”

“Are you serious?”

“It’s your choice. I’m tired of the two women in my life acting like immature schoolgirls. You can’t have everything you want and not at least make an effort to give back to your family.”

“Why is it on me to fix it? Have you told Pam she has to play nice or you’re going to take away the swanky lifestyle she’d never be able to afford on her own?”

“I don’t talk to my wife as if she were my twenty-three-year-old daughter. We’ve had conversations and she’s aware of how important it is for me that the two of you are on good terms.”

Meredith wanted to smash all the dishes laid out between them but she knew that such emotional display would only make her look like an idiot. She needed to harness all her self-control and use it to act rationally. She reached for her purse and stood up.

“Thanks for meeting me for lunch.” Before she turned to leave, she faced her father. “I’ll live in Paris. Without your help.”

• • •

“Are you sure you didn’t know that Pam and Thompson went to college together? That he introduced her to my father?”

Tatiana shook her head. “I wish I did. You can’t trust your stepmom, Meredith. Her or anyone else.”

After her disastrous lunch with her father, Meredith had sought out Tatiana’s company. She wanted to find out more about the relationship between her stepmother and Tatiana’s husband. Pam was investigating a murder that somehow involved Thompson and she had said multiple times that she disliked the man. But was it possible Pam was protecting him, and did he have anything to do with her hatred toward Julian?

Meredith lay on Tatiana’s bed. “I wonder if she’s aware that your husband goes to The Raven Room.”

“If she does, it’s because Steven couldn’t keep his mouth shut. My sister was the only person I ever told I had a membership and I wish—”

Meredith sat up. “You have a membership?”

“Didn’t you see me at the club?”

“I assumed you had access to it because of your husband.”

“He has a membership too, but I got mine first. It’s because of me that he got involved with The Raven Room.”

“If you wanted to, would you be able to get in?”

“Sure, why not?”

“Do you ever think about going back?”

“I’ve never met anyone who has managed to walk away. That place takes hold of you.” Tatiana’s serious expression broke into a smile. “It’s a mix of prohibition bordello with opium den atmosphere.”

“Julian said that what Thompson did to you at the club cost him his membership…would it be safe if you visited The Raven Room?”

“Nothing happens to me there that I haven’t consented to. Same with you or anyone else.”

“What if you and I went together? Could we?”

“When?

“Tonight?”

Before Tatiana could reply, she continued. “How long has it been since you’ve been outside? A month and a half, two months?” If Meredith was to learn more about the murders, she needed to go back to the club, but she didn’t want to share her true motivation with Tatiana. “Don’t you want to get out of this condo? Go somewhere? The Raven Room is the perfect place. We’ll have fun together, without having to worry about your husband or the police.”

“Six weeks. It’s been six weeks since I’ve been outside.”

“Listen, I’ll go back to my place and borrow a dress and pair of high heels from my roommate for you. You two aren’t the same size, but close enough. I also have this black wig I wore to a Halloween party a couple of years ago. I’ll drive back here, drop off everything, and while you’re getting ready I’ll head to the club.” Meredith knew she was being followed, either by the police or someone else. It would be safer for Tatiana if they traveled separately. “You can take a cab there. You’ll look very different. No one will know it’s you. We’ll meet at the check-in area of the club.”

Tatiana continued to face the ceiling. When Meredith thought she had decided to ignore her, she spoke. “As long as on our way back here we get to stop in the cemetery to visit my sister’s grave.”

Meredith didn’t hesitate. “Let’s do it.”

“Julian can’t know.”

“Is it because I shouldn’t go to the club without him? I’ve always been there as his guest.”

“If you’ve been at least once it means you’ve been vetted. After that, you can get in as a guest of any member.”

“Where is he now?” Meredith asked.

“Not home.”

“What if we run into him at The Raven Room?”

“We won’t.”

Tatiana spoke with such certainty that Meredith believed her.

• • •

Two hours later, Tatiana met Meredith by the check-in area of the club. Relief over having reached their destination without any trouble coursed through Meredith, and on impulse, she kissed Tatiana.

“I like the way you kiss,” Tatiana said as she caressed Meredith’s neck. “Like you don’t have a care in the world.”

“There’s only one thing missing.” Meredith pulled out her Chanel lipstick from inside her purse. She applied it to Tatiana’s lips and when she was happy with the result she took a step back to admire Tatiana. Wearing a black bob wig, a short red dress, and six-inch heels, Tatiana had lost her soft, ingénue appearance. She looked like a woman Meredith should be intimidated by. “You’re beautiful,” she whispered to Tatiana.

Tatiana turned to the check-in desk and passed the security guard her phone and Meredith’s. Next, she pressed her thumb to a small glass surface by the reception desk. When Meredith didn’t follow her through the main door, Tatiana appeared confused. “What are you waiting for?”

“Don’t you need your membership card?”

“You mean my key?” Tatiana chuckled. “That’s just theatrics. All they really need is my fingerprint.”

As they entered the club, Meredith smiled inwardly—she had missed The Raven Room. But the nostalgic feeling quickly disappeared and she stiffened. She remembered the club might be the reason behind the deaths of two women.

Tatiana left to use the bathroom, and Meredith lingered on the main floor, surrounded by a crowd too at ease to allow her to continue to feel apprehensive. Bodies brushed against her. The usual curtness that came with that type of anonymous contact, which she had experienced at concerts and nightclubs, wasn’t there. The touch of soft fabric, bare arms touching her uncovered skin, the physical awareness with which the people around her moved, all made her feel attuned to her own body.

She saw Tatiana talking to a well-dressed Asian man with shoulder-length hair. In his three-piece suit, he didn’t blend in. He reminded her of the security guards she had come face-to-face with when she had tried to sneak into the lower level. But he didn’t wear all black, and as far as she could tell, he didn’t wear an earpiece either.

By the time she reached Tatiana, the man had walked away.

“Who was that?” she asked.

“An old acquaintance.” Tatiana adjusted her wig, running her fingers through the short bangs. “Let’s go. I need to drink something strong.”

They had just sat at the bar when Meredith spotted Ben, the bartender.

“I was wondering when I’d get to see you again. Where’s Julian?” he asked.

Meredith pondered over her response. She didn’t know how much she should trust Ben. She held Tatiana’s hand. “He’s not here tonight. I came with someone else.”

As Ben took in the faded scars on Tatiana’s body, Meredith felt Tatiana tense up beside her.

“What can I get you?” he asked.

Even without words, Tatiana’s displeasure toward Ben became evident. Awkwardness settled between the three of them and Meredith, mustering a grin, tried to dissipate it. “Bulleit on the rocks.”

Tatiana’s demeanor remained cold. “Mint Julep. Add both to my account.”

“I need your key.”

Tatiana made a sound of disgust. “Jesus, Ben, spare us. Straight up alcohol with no bullshit will do.”

“It’s the rules.”

“I don’t have my key with me, and I know you can add it to my account.” She tilted her head toward Meredith. “Do it for our beautiful friend here.”

“I can’t—”

“Go ahead, Ben.”

The same man Meredith had seen speaking to Tatiana arrived at the bar. He gave a silent nod to Ben, who responded by preparing their drinks.

Tatiana didn’t turn to face him and the man’s eyes lingered on the curve of her neck, his stare as intimate as a caress. Tatiana let go of Meredith’s hand.

“Aren’t you going to introduce me to your girlfriend?” he asked.

Meredith reached for the drink Ben had placed in front of her. She took a long sip.

“Vincent, Meredith; Meredith, Vincent.”

Vincent extended his hand to her, seemingly not bothered by Tatiana’s hurried introduction. “Pleasure to meet you, Meredith.”

“Likewise.” Meredith gave him a firm handshake. “How do you and Tatiana know each other?”

All his attention was now on her. “The club.”

Meredith waited for Vincent to elaborate, but suddenly, he stepped away from the bar.

“I’ll see you both around.”

Meredith watched Vincent walk away. He carried himself with effortless authority—the type of man that didn’t answer to anyone.

“An old acquaintance, huh? Who is he really?” Meredith asked Tatiana quietly. The background music drowned their voices, but part of her felt that Vincent could still hear their conversation.

“Someone you might want to fuck but not fuck with.”

“How did you two meet?”

“I used to work here.”

Meredith’s eyes widened.

“Not as a sex worker.”

“I didn’t—”

“Don’t lie, Meredith; it’s written all over your face. You’re not as open-minded as you pretend to be, do you know that?” Tatiana chugged half of her drink. “I had Ben’s job.”

For a short second, Meredith thought that Tatiana might be kidding. “How come? And you and Julian never saw each other?”

“I stopped bartending before Julian showed up. By then, I had my own membership. It was easy to avoid him. He always stayed downstairs. Until the day he brought you with him. That’s why he saw me. I guess I have you to thank for bringing us back together.”

“It wasn’t me who brought you two together again. It was your sister.”

“I guess you could say that.”

“How did you get a bartending job here? Do all employees have a membership as well?” Meredith asked.

“Employees don’t have memberships. And I can’t tell you how I ended up working here. That’s against the rules.”

“The same way it’s against the rules to buy alcohol without your key.”

“Some rules, like that one, are there to make you feel like you belong to an exclusive club. They’re meaningless. Others are there to keep you alive. Those rules, Meredith, should not be ignored.”

“Does Vincent work for the club?”

“Sort of.”

“I was expecting a yes or no answer.”

“‘Sort of’ is the most honest answer I can give you.”

Tatiana absently traced the marks on her arms.

“I tried finding a dress with long sleeves.” It sounded almost like an apology, Meredith realized.

“Do you think they’re ugly?” While the question implied vulnerability, Tatiana’s voice carried no such emotion.

Meredith recalled Ben’s reaction to Tatiana’s scars. “People might think they’re unpleasant.”

“For some people here, they make me captivating.” Tatiana chuckled, but Meredith was unable to do the same. “I’ve become priceless.”

At that moment, Ben replaced their empty glasses with new drinks, and even though he didn’t say it, Meredith knew they came with compliments from Vincent.

“I’ve only been here a few times but I never saw anything that I wasn’t, in a way, expecting to see at any sex club,” she said to Tatiana. “Which makes me believe that the people who might find you priceless dwell in other areas of the club; perhaps the lower level?”

“I can’t take you down there.”

Tatiana’s firm answer didn’t deter Meredith. “Why not? Is it because I’m not allowed?”

“Yes. And even if I could, I wouldn’t.”

“What are your reasons not to?”

Tatiana turned on her seat, toward Meredith. “Dive into BDSM, explore some safe, sane, and consensual fetishes. If that’s not your thing, the club still has plenty to offer. Three floors of it. They were designed for people like you. Healthy, fun, exciting. You’ll meet some amazing men and woman along the way. I guarantee you.”

“The young woman I told you about, Lena, she—”

“It’s called The Raven Room,” Tatiana interrupted.

“Excuse me?”

“The lower level. That’s where the name of the club comes from. There’s no harm in you knowing that. Don’t ask me why that name, though. I sincerely don’t know.”

“Both Lena and Sofia ended up dead because of this place. I can’t prove it yet but I know that’s the truth. I also know that this club killed your sister.”

“What do you want me to do? Call your stepmom?”

The bitterness in Tatiana’s voice warned Meredith that they were about to fall into an argument.

“I’ll be back.” With her drink in hand, Meredith left the bar and made her way upstairs. She needed a few minutes to herself.

As Meredith reached the second floor, she stopped by the banister. The unique scent she had come to love filled her senses. She remembered the first time she had visited the club with Julian. She had felt welcomed, at ease. Such strong sense of belonging had been a new emotion for her. She didn’t want to feel at home in a place associated with murder, but she had to be honest with herself—she loved The Raven Room.

“You look unhappy.”

Startled by Vincent’s sudden appearance, Meredith took a step back.

“You can see your girlfriend from here.”

Meredith followed Vincent’s gaze. Tatiana still sat by the bar.

“She looks even more unhappy than you do.”

Vincent was right. Tatiana looked like she was crying as she slouched on her stool, her elbows resting on the counter, with her head tipped forward.

“Did Tatiana tell you how we came to know each other?” Vincent asked.

“Are you trying to find out how much I know about the club?”

“I’m trying to find out how much you know about me.”

Meredith instinctively leaned away, toward the banister. The nervousness she felt in Vincent’s presence made her overlook her fear of heights. The wooden handrail, which now supported her weight, gave slightly under her. She suppressed a gasp.

“You’re a journalism graduate student at the University of Chicago. How do you like it?”

“Who told you that?” she asked, still holding the handrail. She didn’t have to look at her hand to see that her knuckles had turned white.

“Julian Reeve.”

“You two are friends?”

A naked couple to their left started having sex against the wall. Neither she nor Vincent paid them any attention.

“It’s on your guest file,” he replied.

“So you’re an employee?”

Vincent smirked. “Exactly. What do you think of The Raven Room?”

His question sounded innocent enough, but Meredith worried it carried a double meaning.

“Sex, money, and power. Aren’t those the things everyone wants?”

“The more often you come to the club, the less sex you’ll end up having. At least here,” he said.

Meredith took in his flawless white teeth, his smooth skin, and his well-groomed black hair. Human beings were not supposed to look so unmarred.

“Too much choice?” she asked.

He tilted his head in the direction of the couple. “Not enough clothes.”

She frowned, confused.

“Fully naked people are hardly ever sexy.”

Meredith chuckled at his words.

“You should visit the room on the top floor.” He pointed toward the staircase that would lead her upstairs and his silver cufflinks caught the light. “It’s known as the Black Dragon.”

Meredith remembered a conversation she had had months ago with a woman named Nina. She had drawn a floor plan of the club on a mirror with her red lipstick. She had mentioned that each room at the club was named after an animal and she had pointed out that particular room—the only one with a door, walls, and ceiling painted black. Meredith had yet to go in.

She finished her drink. Her throat felt dry. She couldn’t shake the feeling that, somehow, Vincent was leading her into a trap.

“I have no interest in the upper floor.” Meredith walked by him, heading downstairs. “Come talk to me when you’re ready to take me to the area of the club that I really want to go to—the original Raven Room.”

Despite her sense of foreboding, when she glanced at him over her shoulder and found him smiling at her, Meredith caught herself smiling back.