CHAPTER 29
ELI
Leave it to me to say the wrong thing.
“Fucking idiot,” I muttered to myself all damned day as I sat in front of the television. I waited. And waited some more. Anxious for nightfall, I couldn’t help but wonder if she’d come back tonight. If maybe she’d find it in her heart to understand where I was coming from.
It wasn’t rejection. My god, I probably couldn’t say no to her even if I wanted to. But I desperately wanted a new life. I’d found a little redemption and it felt so fucking good, I couldn’t turn my back on it now.
Couldn’t she see that I just wanted to be a better man? Couldn’t she understand the toll living the outlaw life took on a man? She’d seen it up close and personal for a long time. I knew she wanted a better life, too.
I just wanted to do the right thing, whatever that was.
Hell, maybe I was wrong, maybe there weren’t any rules. I was just trying to be careful. I mean, all the Gods had found love this way. Grace and Ryder, Riot and Lacey, Wreck and Frankie, Bones and Daisy, Slade and Diana…
Couldn’t she see I wasn’t saying no, I was just being cautious?
Couldn’t she see that I was quickly falling for her, rules or no rules? I wanted to call her, explain everything, assure her that everything was going to work out and that we’d figure out all the logistics as soon as everything was over, but that was out of the question.
I couldn’t risk her safety.
Fuck, her safety was in jeopardy every time she came to my hotel room, I knew that, and that was risk enough for me, for now.
Minutes dragged by torturously and once the sun had set, I couldn’t take my eyes off the damned door, as I waited anxiously for her knock. She’d shown up past midnight both the previous evenings and when the clock struck midnight again, my heart was racing like crazy.
But midnight came and went. Then the next hour. And the next, until I was sure she wasn’t coming and I’d scared her away completely. I cursed myself over and over, attempting to distract myself with television. Desperately, I wanted a drink, my brain tempting me with reminding me how easy it would be to jump on my bike and head to the corner store before they stopped selling booze for the night.
Being sober was hard enough, but knowing I’d hurt her only made me hate myself more and increased the urge to dull the pain. Unfortunately, I knew all too well what kind of pain one drink would bring.
I tossed and turn for another hour, finally passing out and falling into fitful violent dreams. When a knock sounded at the door, I thought I was dreaming it.
I’d given up on ever laying a hand on Sophia again. I was sure I’d ruined any chances for a future with her before we’d even begun. She knocked again, finally ripping me from my slumber.
I answered the door with my heart beating like a drum in my chest.
When I saw the condition of her face, rage pulsed through me.
“What happened?” I shouted, eyeing the busted lip and bright red cheek that I was sure would bruise in a few hours.
“Snake happened,” she murmured. “I pissed him off.”
“I’m going to kill that motherfucker!” I seethed.
“No, you aren’t,” she said, shaking her head. “You’re not going to do anything. Not yet, at least.”
“I’m not going to let him get away with hurting you!”
“Relax, Eli. I’m alright. This isn’t the first time, it’ll heal.”
“Well, you can damn well be sure it’ll be the last. He’s never laying another hand on you.”
“You’re right about that. Because I’m not going to let him. Once we get the girls out, I never want to see him again.”
“Once we get the girls outta there, he’s a dead man walking,” I growled, pulling her into my chest. “I can’t believe this shit. Maybe you shouldn’t go back, Sophia.”
She stared up at me, her eyes wide and searching mine questioningly.
I knew what she was asking.
“If there’s a way for us to be together after this, Sophia, we will. I promise. I know I sounded reluctant last night, but that’s not what I meant —.”
“Hush,” she said, standing up on her toes and brushing her lips against mine. My body responded immediately to her touch, despite the rage ripping through me. “You didn’t say anything wrong. I understand, I do. I overreacted, that’s all.”
“Sophia, I lo—.”
“Stop,” she shook her head, placing a finger on my lips. “Not yet. Let’s just get through this first and then we’ll figure us out after.”
I leaned down, kissing her as gently as I could so I didn’t hurt her more. She wrapped her arms around me, pressing her body into mine.
“I don’t have much time tonight,” she whispered. “I need to get back very soon, but can we —.”
I growled as my body came alive. I smashed my lips to hers.
She pulled me onto the bed behind her and in seconds we were clawing at each other’s clothes until we were naked together again, our flesh pressed together in a hungry dance of lust and need and desire that could only be quelled by one another.
Our hips rocked together as I slid into her, our souls intertwining, our love blossoming silently in the darkness of a stolen, passionate, forbidden moment.