CHAPTER 31
ELI
Watching her walk out the door was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Who knew how far Snake would go before this whole thing was over? I already hated the guy but now I seriously wanted to wipe him from the face of the Earth.
I’d fallen for Sophia. Hard and fast. Too fast, yeah, I know. Faster than I’d ever fallen for anyone before. Maybe it was foolish. Maybe it was dangerous. Maybe everything would come falling down around me but there was no way in hell I could stop this avalanche of emotion, even if I wanted to.
I loved her.
How that was possible with my old, shriveled up, dead heart, I wasn’t sure. But somehow, she’d snuck in and there she was. Taking up space, filling my heart with love and lust and desire and I was drunk on her.
Morning came and I couldn’t stand being alone in the hotel room any longer. I headed over to the restaurant again and ate breakfast, then I took a walk, leaving my bike behind.
I needed to move. I found a park and began jogging around it, stopping every few minutes to knock out a set of push-ups before jogging again. An hour later, I was panting and sweaty and exhausted and walked back to the hotel just as the rain started pouring again.
Clear skies never last very long in Oregon.
Opening the curtains in the hotel, I sat there for hours, watching the clouds roll in and the rain drench the city. Rain was an every day existence here, and I’d grown to love it, to enjoy the cleansing feeling I had after a good, long downpour. Watching the cars drive by, kicking up the rain puddled in potholes and leaf-clogged sewers, they sprayed the sidewalks and the people on them.
Christmas was a week away and everyone was out shopping and living their lives merrily buying trees and decorating and cooking. If Dad wasn’t in prison, we’d be at the clubhouse right now in Salem, the air filled with the delectable scent of Dad’s famous Christmas ham. Nate and I would exchange gifts, usually something motorcycle related. I’d watch as Nate and Dad got drunk on whiskey, laughing at them stumbling around and singing Christmas carols with all the wrong words.
That would never happen again, at least not for a very long time.
It’s funny how everything can change in an instant.
How one can lose everything in the blink of an eye…
I felt terrible for my Dad. Locked up in prison like that, enduring shit I could only imagine. Shit I didn’t want to imagine…
My phone rang and I was happy to see it was my brother. If anyone would understand what I was going through, it would be him.
“Hey, bro,” I answered.
“Eli, how’s it going out there?”
“Honestly, I’m riding a rollercoaster of emotion right now. I was just thinking about Dad. I feel so bad for him.”
“Yeah, me too. I talked to him yesterday, doesn’t sound like he’s doing too well. Got in a fight, broke a rib…”
“Shit.”
“Yeah, I know,” he said. “What are you so broken up about?”
“If I tell you, you can’t tell Grace and Ryder, or anyone else either.”
“Dude, when I have ever betrayed your trust?”
“Never,” I replied. “But still…”
“What did you do?”
“It’s crazy, really. I don’t know how it happened.”
“Tell me.”
“It’s Sophia, man…”
“Ah, fuck, dude. I told you not to get mixed up with her.”
“I didn’t really have a choice.”
“Spill it,” he said.
“She showed up at the hotel late the other night…”
“You fucked her?” he asked, his voice turning to a furious whisper.
“Don’t be so fucking crude.”
“Eli, this is a really bad idea.”
“I know, I know. She showed up again the next night. And the last night, too…”
“Jesus, Eli!”
“I know, I know,” I said, pausing. “Listen, man, I think I’m falling for her.”
“She’s going to get you killed!”
“You don’t know that,” I protested.
“You think Snake is going to take this news lightly?”
“No, but he’s not going to find out and soon he’ll be out of the picture anyway.”
“You’re going to fuck everything up, Eli! The job, getting those girls out of there, the Gods will string us up by our fucking balls!”
“Stop being so fucking dramatic, for fuck’s sake, Nate!”
“Look, man, I was there. I met Snake. I saw the power he’s working with, all those men, those fucking dogs! Jesus, my ass still hurts just thinking about them.”
“Everything’s going to be fine. Forget I told you.”
“Yeah, right,” he said. I could feel the disapproval through the phone. I never should have said anything.
“Look, man, I gotta go. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Keep your shit together.”
“My shit isn’t falling apart, contrary to what you think.”
“Just keep your dick in your pants until we get this shit over with, can you do that?”
“Yeah, yeah…”
I hung up the phone without saying another word, feeling even worse than I had before he called. It’s not like I didn’t know how risky this all was, but what was I supposed to do about it now?
Turning the clock back wasn’t an option.
My heart was hooked.