Chapter Sixteen

BY the time Blake managed to leave Henry Clay on Friday, he didn’t know whether he wanted to scream, cry, or throw himself at Thane and never let go. He shouldn’t have agreed to have dinner with Thane, Kit, and Phillip last night. He’d known it was a bad idea when he said yes, and then he’d gone and had a great time. And then, as if that wasn’t bad enough, Thane had shown back up again today for stage crew and brought enough lumber to brace all the platforms with some left over—in case someone measured wrong the first time, he’d said when Blake protested the extra—and had flat-out refused to give Blake the bill so he could reimburse Thane after the performance, when they’d have money in their account again.

He drove into town and found a table at Enoteca. Darren brought him a drink without him asking. He must look like he needed it. “Thanks, Darren.”

“You’re welcome. You okay? You look a little frazzled.”

“Nothing a drink and some tapas won’t fix. I’ll wait for Heidi to get here before I order, but you could bring me some of the Bucherondin to nibble on while I’m waiting for her.”

“You got it,” Darren said.

Blake took a sip of his drink and tried to remember if he’d had time for lunch today. He didn’t think so, which meant he’d better go slowly on the drink or he wouldn’t be driving home tonight. The last thing he needed was to end up with a DUI or be in an accident.

He took a sip of water instead and tried to figure out what to do next. Blake had expected Thane to be distant after he’d turned him down on Wednesday, but Thane hadn’t given any sign of being bothered by it Thursday or today. Of course, that could be because Blake had gone out with them last night, even if he’d insisted it wasn’t a date.

“What’s got that look on your face?” Heidi asked as she sat down across from him. “Dalton giving you trouble again?”

“You could say that,” Blake replied, although honesty compelled him to add, “but not the way you’re thinking.”

“Then what’s going on?”

“He asked me out on Wednesday,” Blake said. “I turned him down, of course, but somehow I still ended up having pizza with him and his nephews last night.”

“That might be a new record for the fastest about-face on the planet,” Heidi teased.

Blake sighed. “It wasn’t a date. Kit, the younger nephew, was struggling a bit with his grades, mostly because he wasn’t applying himself. I told him he had to start doing better or he couldn’t stay onstage crew, and he’s gotten As on the last two tests. The pizza was to celebrate.”

“And?”

“And what?”

She kicked him underneath the table. “Don’t play dumb. I know you better than that. Did you have fun?”

“Too much fun. I know most people think of adolescence as being the worst possible time to be around kids, but I love teenagers. I wouldn’t work in a high school if I didn’t. Kit and Phillip are such bright boys who could have been totally defeated by losing their parents and changing cities and schools and then having to deal with bullies, but they haven’t been. I know Thane has a lot to do with that. He’s worked so hard to help them adjust, and it shows. I can’t remember when I last laughed as hard as I did last night, listening to Kit and Phillip tell stories about his visits when they were younger. They adore him, and for all that he protested them telling some of the stories, it was all done in good fun. It makes it hard to keep my distance.”

“I don’t know why you didn’t get married and have a family years ago,” Heidi said. “And don’t give me that line about you being gay. You know as well as I do there are options—adoption, surrogacy, fostering. I’ve thought for years you’d make a great father.”

“I work too much to be a single father, especially to an infant, and I’ve never met anyone who wanted the same things and who I liked enough to take the risk,” Blake said. “I’ve seen too many kids torn apart by broken homes to take the chance on anything less than a sure bet.”

“There are no sure bets,” Heidi reminded him. “Maybe it’s not divorce, but Dalton is taking care of his nephews. I’m going to bet nobody planned on that happening.”

“Least of all him.”

“My point exactly. He didn’t set out to be a father, but now he is one through whatever twist of fate brought his nephews into his life. That same twist of fate could take you or your partner out of a child’s life regardless of your best intentions. If people didn’t take the chance, you’d be out of a job in a couple of years.”

“I still have to meet someone I like well enough to consider having a family with,” Blake said.

Heidi snorted. “I think you already have. And best of all, he comes with a family attached.”

“I can’t go out with him.”

“Why not? You went out with him last night.”

“Last night I went out with some of my stage crew students and their family. That’s already skirting the line of acceptable behavior. If I start dating the guardian of students I’m responsible for in an active discipline case, I’ll be lucky to have their case handed to someone else rather than be fired for conflict of interest,” Blake said. “I don’t care how attractive he is or how much I love Kit and Phillip. I can’t afford to lose my job.”

“If they weren’t sophomores, if they were juniors and on someone else’s caseload, would it be different?” Heidi asked.

“Yeah, but he’s not asking me out next year. He’s asking me out now.”

“You could try telling him what you just told me. If he’s really interested, he might be willing to wait three months until school’s out.”

“Maybe.”

“You’re going to let this get away from you. You’re an idiot, Blake. I love you like a brother, but you are a goddamn idiot.”

Blake shook his head, but he didn’t argue. Hell, she was probably right, but he couldn’t take the risk of getting his heart broken for what would never mean as much to Thane as it would to him.

BLAKE spent Monday torn between hoping Thane would come to stage crew and hoping he wouldn’t. If he came, Blake would get to see him and spend time with him in a way no one could question, but the more time they spent together, the harder it would be to resist the temptation Thane represented. By the time school let out, he was completely fed up with himself. He had a job to do, both during and after school, and obsessing over Thane didn’t help him accomplish any of it.

He changed clothes and headed to the theater. Jenny would be working on blocking the sewer scene all week, so he and the stage crew would work on something else, probably the Havana nightclub. It was a simpler set—walls in the background and tables and props for the rest—but they still had to build and paint the walls.

He heard Thane’s voice the moment he stepped into the theater. So much for keeping his distance. He was tempted to use the work onstage as an excuse to retreat to the light box and work on lighting for the scene, but until Jenny figured out where everyone was during the scene, there was no point in worrying about which rows of lights to have on with which gels or where to have the spots pointing. He took a steadying breath and headed backstage. He’d just have to find other ways to keep his distance.

He managed it for most of the first hour. Thane seemed content to work with Kit on one set of walls while Blake worked with Zach and his crew on the finishing touches for the mission. When he came down off the ladder they’d been using to create the makeshift roof, though, he found Thane right there.

“Hi. I didn’t get a chance to say that earlier.”

“Hi.” Blake’s voice sounded like a croak in his own ears. He cleared his throat. “Did you have a good weekend?”

“Busy but good.” Thane leaned against the wall of the set, leaving Blake feeling caught between the mission wall and Thane’s body. He blinked a couple of times and slid out around the ladder.

“Good to hear it. Kit and Phillip deserved a break, as hard as they’ve been working.”

“Phillip had a date on Saturday,” Thane said with a shake of his head. “I’m not ready to be a parent. I’m certainly not ready for dating.”

Blake laughed. “You remember what it was like to be a teenager. He’ll be fine.”

“I remember.” Thane’s voice deepened. “That’s what I’m worried about.”

Blake wanted to laugh it off and tell Thane he had nothing to worry about, but the words died in his throat. Phillip didn’t have the same bad-boy air about him that Thane had developed so early, nor any of the self-confidence bordering on brazenness that had let him casually announce to the whole school that he’d had anal sex with a girl, but Blake remembered it all too clearly, and now, standing in close proximity to Thane, his magnetism was almost too much.

“I need to get more nails for the roof,” he squeaked, retreating toward the closet where they kept their supplies, but Thane followed on his heels. The closet was barely large enough for both of them to fit, but Thane seemed to have no qualms about crowding with Blake into the small space.

“I found my senior yearbook, you know,” Thane said in that deep, rumbly voice that did unspeakable things to Blake’s libido. “It’s probably a good thing I didn’t notice you back then. I wouldn’t have known what to do with you.”

Blake choked back a laugh at the memory of Thane’s casual announcement to the school cafeteria and the effect it had had on him. “I think you would have.”

Thane turned Blake around to face him, his heavy hands hot on Blake’s shoulders even through the layers of cloth that separated their skin. “I’m sure I would have managed to fuck you,” Thane agreed, and the thought alone was enough to make Blake weak in the knees, “but I wouldn’t have known how to treat you the way you deserve.” He stroked Blake’s cheek with one thick finger. Blake’s eyes fluttered shut despite himself. “I wouldn’t have known how to keep you.”

Blake’s eyes shot open. Thane hadn’t just said that. But Thane met his gaze steadily, not backing away from the statement in the slightest.

“Is that what you want?” Blake asked hoarsely.

Thane smiled and took a step back. “I’d be a fool to want anything less.”

Before Blake could process that, Thane turned and left, the closet door swinging shut behind him.

Oh God, how was he supposed to resist that? He’d managed up until now because he’d been convinced Thane was just looking for some fun. Now, though….

He sank to the floor and stared at the shelves on the other wall of the closet. What had he gotten himself into?