Bryant Compton held his breath. Was today going to be the day he finally found out what it was like to kiss a cowboy? Or any guy, for that matter?

He prayed it was.

“Like what you see?” Vaughn Sevan looked up from arranging gear in the barn’s tack room and flashed him a wicked grin that emphasized his dimples. They peeked from beneath sooty scruff that speckled his strong jawline. The deep shadow there enhanced the ultra-white gleam of his wolfish smile. His Armenian roots were showing. Damn, they were sexy.

Bryant tried to say yes. Instead, all he could manage was a gulp. He swiped his dusty forearm across his parched lips, wondering why he hadn’t brought a bigger water bottle with him that morning when reporting to the barn for chores.

Snake’s son had only recently started working on Compass Ranch after coming to live with his ailing dad, who’d had Vaughn late in life after a not-so-wise hook-up with a woman he’d met at a wild rodeo after-party out of state. Two years older than Bryant, Vaughn had crossed his path on summer breaks and other visits in the past. However, it was only since he’d become a permanent fixture at the ranch, taking over Snake’s duties while caring for his father, that he’d begun strutting around with his shirt off, sweat rolling down his tanned back, and his powerful legs visible through the rips in his jeans. That’s when Bryant realized just how gorgeous and cut the other guy was.

Vaughn chuckled, then leaned in to whisper, “What do you plan to do about it, big guy?”

“Uh.” Bryant choked. Sure, he was taller than Vaughn by a couple of inches, but he’d bet he was a hell of a lot less experienced. At least if Vaughn’s assessing gaze had anything to say about it. You know, that and the fact that everything Bryant had ever done with a guy had taken place in his fantasies.

What the hell could he do? While the ranch was overrun with alpha males, there weren’t many role models for the kind of relationship he thought he might like to have. Was he supposed to take charge? He’d much rather let Vaughn have the reins.

Except his hesitation spoiled the moment.

Vaughn backed up a step, his smile dimming some as he angled for the door. “Ah, shit. I forgot. Despite your grown-ass body, you’re still just a kid.”

“Hey, I’m almost eighteen. Going to college out of state in a couple of months on a full scholarship.” That didn’t sound juvenile to Bryant. So what if he hadn’t technically accepted yet? Or even broken the news to his parents, for that matter.

It didn’t impress Vaughn much, in any case. He took another step back, his boot heels clunking on the wide old floorboards as he jammed his hands into his pockets. “I heard you were smart. Maybe you should start acting like it instead of teasing losers like me in your daddy’s barn—somebody might take you up on it. You’re not ready.”

I am. I mean, I’m pretty sure I am. Bryant tried to ignore the sting of rejection that needled him more and more with every bit of distance his crush put between them. Maybe that was why he made one of the dumbest decisions in his life next.

He watched Vaughn spin around and disappear into the yard, and heaved a sigh of regret. Why had he frozen at the last second? If he’d gone for it, swooped in and taken what he’d wanted, maybe they’d be making out right now. He could have tucked himself against Vaughn’s washboard abs and defined chest, wrapped his arms around Vaughn’s trim waist and held on tight. Instead, he’d let Vaughn see that he was unsure of himself and…well, now he was standing here alone.

Or at least he thought he was.

“Hey, don’t worry about that asshole,” someone—he thought it might be the guy who’d just signed on this week—said as he came out of the shadows behind Bryant, scaring the ever-loving shit out of him. Damn it, whoever it was had overheard his whole mortifying swing and miss. “What does he have to be so damn arrogant about? He’s, what, a whole year older than you?”

Ignoring the flaming in his cheeks, Bryant tried to gauge whether the hand who’d obviously witnessed his failed flirtation was about to bash him for being gay.

Around Compass Ranch, testosterone flowed like the river in the gorge after a spring thaw. He’d listened to his cousins endlessly lusting after girls. It made it tough to be himself sometimes. Not that anyone had intentionally given him shit, he just didn’t have anyone who could really relate.

This guy was new. Who knew what he’d put up with…

“If you want someone to show you the ropes, why not go with somebody who’s been where you are? I’d be happy to teach you a thing or two.” The cowboy nudged Bryant until they swung fully into the tack room, lost in a dark cranny of the barn.

A stranger? A much older, harder man. Without the vibrancy and youth of Snake’s son.

But he was here. Vaughn wasn’t, and didn’t seem like he was interested in taking the guy’s place anytime soon. Bryant just wanted a kiss. A taste of what his cousins had already experienced.

Hell, Austin had made out with Clover Willis in the woods behind school in the sixth grade, and he and James were fooling around with their homecoming dates before the king and queen had even been crowned earlier that spring. Even Doug, his youngest cousin, had made it to second base by now.

Bryant just wanted one damn kiss. To know, for sure, that it was what he craved.

“That’s right, don’t let anyone tell you what you can and can’t have,” the guy coached as he approached.

He held perfectly still as the ranch hand knocked Bryant’s hat from his head then leaned in, trapping him against a weathered post. His heart pounded in his chest. He should probably listen to the sliver of his brain telling him this wasn’t the right way to do this. That this guy didn’t know anything about him, didn’t care about him, was at least twice his age.

He was being used…

To be honest, the majority of his seventeen-year-old brain didn’t give a damn.

He just wanted to know, once and for all, if it was as good as he imagined it might be.

Bryant moaned softly when the guy kept coming. “Hey, uh, could you at least tell me your name first?”

“Bill. Make sure you scream it later.” He lowered his head and crushed his mouth against Bryant’s.

Bryant was still wondering exactly how a kiss would make him scream. Especially because it wasn’t exactly how he’d pictured it, but he couldn’t deny that his cock reacted to the pressure of the guy’s sloppy tongue.

He parted his mouth, struggling to take a breath. Bill didn’t stop there. He deepened his hold, making Bryant wince when teeth bruised his lips from both the inside and outside. He’d been decked before. Had laughed and wiped away the blood from a split lip one of his cousins had given him when they’d argued about something unimportant. But he hadn’t expected to be hurt right then, by a guy who seemed to be into him. He’d thought it would be more…pleasurable.

Bill jammed his dirty hand down the front of Bryant’s jeans and growled, “You like that, don’t you?”

“I guess,” he attempted to say. His timid response was devoured by the ranch hand, who seemed to be getting off on what they were doing. Maybe Bryant was the weird one for not enjoying it as much as he’d anticipated.

He scrunched his eyes closed, trying desperately to magnify the warm, tingly feelings and suppress the warning bells, which leaned toward panic or even pain. When the man fisted Bryant’s cock in his hand and squeezed, Bryant couldn’t help his reaction. He instinctually rocked his hips toward the tight grip, fucking dry into the man’s calloused fingers. It might have been rough, but his body still responded. In fact, if he wasn’t careful, the guy would end up with come all over his hand.

At seventeen, it didn’t take much to set Bryant off.

“See. You’re into it. Don’t act like you’re not. We don’t have time for coy.”

He was right about that. It wouldn’t be more than twenty minutes until the rest of the hands came in from the far pastures, where they’d been mending fences before they sent Bryant and this guy back to get the stalls ready for the rest of the work horses.

“Okay, sorry.” Bryant swallowed hard. No one’s first foray into intimacy was perfect right?

If he passed up this opportunity, who knew when there would be another?

None of the other guys around the ranch—or in town, for that matter—would look at him twice. Compass Ranch was home to some people in unconventional relationships, including his uncle Silas and uncle Colby, who were both married to his aunt Lucy. There still weren’t any openly gay Comptons, though. Besides, everyone knew it wasn’t good for your long-term employment options to fool around with the boss’s kid. Since their ranch paid well and had better benefits than nearly all other operations in a three-state radius, they tended to attract the best of the best. Which apparently also meant something about morals and shit.

Once Bill realized who Bryant was, he wouldn’t be offering to jack him off anymore either.

“Can I touch you, too?”

“Hell yeah.” The man unbuckled his pants and shoved his jeans to his knees. He wasn’t wearing any underwear, something that surprised Bryant, though he couldn’t say why. The guy’s dick was hard if sort of disappointing. It wasn’t anything like the ones in the porn he’d snuck a peek at on his laptop. “What? Ain’t you never seen a cock before, boy?”

Bryant shook his head. “I mean, not other than mine or my cousins’, but that’s not the same.”

“No, I don’t suppose it is.” Bill grinned, revealing a few missing teeth and several others that needed to be pulled. “In that case, come take a closer look.” He crumpled the front of Bryant’s shirt in his fist and yanked, sending Bryant sprawling on the floor.

He caught his balance, keeping himself kneeling at least even if he might have a chip in his kneecap.

Bill stepped closer, putting his cock right at eye-level. Or mouth-level.

It wasn’t any more impressive from this vantage point. The guy had obviously been sweating out on the job, but Bryant licked his lips anyway. He’d always wondered…

Bill laughed as he speared his fingers into Bryant’s hair and used the grip to position Bryant’s mouth near his cock and balls. “Get it in your mouth. Suck it, like you want to.”

Bryant did want to. Sort of. But he also was having some pretty serious doubts. What if Vaughn came back? He scanned the interior of the barn. Nobody was around.

Who was he kidding? Vaughn had made himself perfectly clear. He wasn’t coming back.

Bryant swallowed hard, then thought of how Vaughn had dismissed him because of his inexperience. Maybe next time he wouldn’t be so eager to walk away. Maybe if Bryant knew what he was doing, he’d have a shot at seducing the guy he really wanted…

He closed his eyes and pictured Vaughn, the predatory flash he’d had in his eyes the day he’d stumbled upon Bryant and his cousins skinny dipping in the back pond a few weeks ago. What if he’d been alone? What if he knew how to handle a guy like Vaughn?

It was time to learn so that he’d be prepared for next time.

Bryant parted his lips. The cowboy did the rest. Bill wrapped his hand around the nape of Bryant’s neck before tugging him toward his crotch. It felt so weird when the guy’s dick slid along his lips. Slippery and salty when it plunged into his mouth. At least it wasn’t huge, so he didn’t choke or anything. He’d hardly gotten used to the heat and weight against his tongue when the guy began to rock his hips, fucking Bryant’s face with coarse shoves and grunts.

He figured that meant he was doing something right, so he tried sucking on it some.

It wasn’t horrible. In fact, by now he was pretty damn hard.

So he reached down and cupped his aching shaft and balls.

Bill noticed. “You were made for this. Do it much more and I’m going to ruin your fun before we get started.”

Started? With what? They’d already done more than Bryant had dared to imagine.

He pulled back to clarify, “I thought… Maybe I could get you off and you could do the same for me. Like this.”

“Nah, we’re not stopping here.” The man shook his head. “You don’t know what you’re missing out on. Let me show you.”

Vaughn had been right. Bryant wasn’t ready for that. For more.

“I don’t think—”

Bill gripped his upper arm and flung him around. It was right about then Bryant realized he’d been overconfident in himself and the protection afforded by his family’s name. Hell, this guy might not have even realized Bryant was a Compton, son of one of Compass Ranch’s owners.

His gut hit the corner of a bale of hay, knocking some of the wind from him. “Hey, I’m not sure…”

“Oh no. You’re not going to back out now, are you?” Bill sneered as he shuffled between Bryant’s knees. “You led me on. You can’t get me hard and ready to fuck then leave me hanging.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to. I never did this before.” Bryant shook his head, trying to think clearly. Had he given the guy the wrong impression? Yeah, probably. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t change his mind, did it?

What was the right thing to do?

While he debated, Bill didn’t hesitate. He yanked Bryant’s jeans to his knees, then shoved between his shoulders, hard. His chest smashed into the hay. And next thing he knew, the guy was mounting him, shoving his cock through Bryant’s crack, nudging his asshole as he growled.

“Don’t you need…?” Bryant swallowed his objection, embarrassed to even say the word lube. That probably should have been a clue to himself that he wasn’t mature enough for what was about to happen.

Instead, Bill spit on his hand, then rubbed it around a bit before holding his cock down with two fingers and spearing Bryant with it. Thank God it wasn’t even half as long or thick as Bryant’s own dick. It hurt bad enough as it was.

Bryant roared, then bucked, trying to dislodge the guy. Unfortunately, Bill dealt with unruly horses for a living. Bryant didn’t stand a chance.

“Stay still. Give it a second. You’re going to love this.” Bill didn’t waste any time. He began riding Bryant, slamming into him hard enough that his balls slapped against Bryant’s taint. Bryant was half-excited and half-terrified. Neither eclipsed his pain.

He gave it a second.

He still wasn’t having fun.

Bryant shouted, “Enough! Get off me! I changed my mind.”

“I’m almost done.” The guy huffed, then slapped Bryant’s ass, hard. “Stay still. Man up and take it. Fuck yeah.”

“No, stop!” Bryant started to panic. He balled his fists but couldn’t reach around far enough to get in a swing at the guy taking advantage of him. “I’m serious. Stop. Please…”

Just as he was about to freak the fuck out, someone shouted, “What the hell is going on in here?”

In that moment, Bryant felt relief first, followed immediately by a sickening wave of humiliation and shame.

Jake.

Bryant couldn’t see what happened then, but he felt Bill’s cock being ripped from his body around the time he heard a dull thud that sounded like a fist smashing into someone’s face. Oh shit. Oh shit.

He scrambled to his feet, yanking up his pants as fast as he could given the shock of his body and the utter disappointment mixed in with the rest of the swirling emotions assaulting him. Something he’d dreamed about forever had just gotten utterly wrecked. He’d learned his lesson.

Cowboys weren’t for him.

“Get the fuck off this ranch. You’re fired. And if I ever see you again, you’ll lose more than your job over this,” Jake snarled, enraged and dangerous in a way Bryant hadn’t fully realized he was capable of. He was seeing a lot of the world for the first time today.

“Who gives you the right?” Bill had the bad sense to argue. “You’re just some old man—”

“He’s part of our family,” Bryant barked. It was one thing for someone to come at him, but no one messed with Jake. He stood beside the man he’d come to think of as a surrogate grandfather.

“None of the Compass brothers will stand for you attacking innocents around here, least of all one of their own children.” Jake spit at the man. “Go ahead and try them if you think they’ll be more lenient than me. You’ll find I’m a cuddly teddy bear in comparison. Start with Silas. He’s always had a soft spot for Bryant. This kid might even be Si’s favorite nephew. It’ll be fun to watch how you handle yourself with someone your own size. Your own age. Someone far stronger and faster, too.”

Bill paled. The consequences of what he’d done were finally beginning to sink in. “I didn’t need this piece-of-shit job anyway.”

“That’s good. Because once I spread the word about how you’re compensating for that tiny cock by abusing young men, you’re not going to get another offer within a thousand miles of here.” Jake crossed his arms and spread his feet wide. “Get out of my sight before I change my mind about kicking your ass on the way out.”

Without another word, the guy turned and ran, his belt buckle clanking with every step. He hadn’t even bothered to finish getting dressed.

Bryant sagged against the tack room beam. Thank god the barn was there to hold him up.

His family, the ranch—they would always be there for him to lean on.

Even when he’d been a colossal idiot.

“Are you hurt bad, kid?” Jake winced as he caught sight of a streak of blood on Bryant’s pants. It wasn’t anything life-threatening. Alarming enough to make them both realize what might have happened if Jake hadn’t sensed something was off and come to check on him, though. Had Vaughn tipped Jake off somehow?

Bryant dusted off his jeans and forced himself to stand straight. “I’m fine.”

“You’re not. But you will be,” Jake promised.

“I just wanted a kiss,” Bryant croaked. “That’s it. I swear.”

“You’re a handsome kid, polite, charming, and you’ve got more brains than everyone else on this ranch put together. There’s somebody out there for you. Somebody who will respect you.”

Bryant studied the wood grain in the floor intensely. “I don’t know. It’s just…the Compass Curse, you know? No one will even look at me once they figure out I’m a Compton.” He shrugged one shoulder. “Every eligible guy in this damn town stays half a mile away from me because they’re afraid of my dad and uncles. And you, of course.”

“Well, the smart ones are anyway.” Jake grinned. “Didn’t mean to cock block you.”

Bryant groaned and tried to erase that phrase and Jake using it from his memory. In fact, he wished he could delete the entire day from his medial temporal lobe. He hoped they could walk out of here and never mention it again.

“Jake, please. Don’t tell my parents, okay?” He swallowed hard, trying his best not to disgrace himself further by crying. But when he thought about having to admit what had happened to his father or Uncle Silas…shit. The last time he’d done that he’d probably been five and had gashed his arm bad enough to need stitches when he’d ignored Jake’s advice not to chase his cousins with pitchforks in this very same barn.

Damn this place.

He thought of the letter he’d gotten yesterday, the one he hadn’t even told his family about yet despite bragging to Vaughn about it.

His mind was instantly made up. He was going to go away to college.

“Kid, I don’t know…” Jake slapped his hat against his thigh. “That bastard should go to jail for what he did to you. Your uncle Sawyer would have him locked up in a second. You know that, don’t you?”

Bryant nodded. He did. And that was the problem.

“I don’t feel right about that.” Bryant cleared his throat. “I might have led him on. I wanted to see what it was like and…well, now I know.”

“You don’t know shit, Bryant.” Jake whipped a glare in his direction. “If you think that what happened here today is anything like it should be when you make love with someone you care about, and who cares about you, you’re nowhere near as genius as I thought you were. Hell, even if you were just looking to hook up and have a little fun…nope. That’s not what I saw and heard as I came into this barn.”

Bryant’s face burned. He stared at his boots.

Then things got even worse. Vaughn bolted through the door. News traveled fast in a small town, faster still on the ranch. “Son of a bitch, Bryant. Are you okay?”

“Fine.” Like he would admit anything else to the handsome young cowboy who’d turned him down flat.

“Vaughn, time to get back to work.” Jake came to the rescue again. “I’ve got this covered. Thank you for your concern.”

Though he opened his mouth as if to argue, Vaughn closed it. They both knew he needed his job to support Snake, who was going downhill fast. “Yes, sir. Sorry.”

“No need to apologize. Just go on now.”

With a final lingering glance over his shoulder, he nodded and left.

Jake mumbled, “Boy, he’s the one you should have been screwing around with.”

“I tried. He isn’t into me.” Bryant might as well admit it. He had no pride left to object.

“Hmm.” Jake made a sound somewhere in between disbelief and wisdom. Had it been some other day he almost certainly would have had more to say about the matter than that simple harrumph. But both of them were a little talked out.

They’d shared enough for one day.

If only Bryant had stayed and listened, he might have saved himself a whole lot of pain and longing. Because for years after, no one could measure up to the beautiful boy he’d lost before he’d ever had him.